Forbidden Love (Needle's Kiss Book 3)

by Lola Stark

  The recording stopped and I looked up at Jude who was sitting there in front of me, never having left my side. He looked so worried; I realized something I’d not seen in the last few months. Jude had worn himself out worrying about me. His hair was a mess; he had dark circles under his eyes, and it was evident he’d lost weight. All for me. Jude sacrificed himself the only way he knew how, just to make sure I was okay.

  “I’m not putting the moves on you. Just in case you thought I was trying to…I don’t know, worm my way in.” He put his phone down on the table beside him and rested his elbows on his knees. “I do love you, Haven. Fiercely. But I also know you need time. Shit, you may not want me at all, and that’s up to you. I won’t force myself on you. But all that time ago, when you told me you didn’t love me anymore, I think you lied.” Jude stood and started pacing. “I think you can love two people at once. I think you still loved me then.” He stopped and looked at me, his hands splayed open at his sides. “You might even love me now.”

  He slid back onto the table in front of me, his large warm hand encasing my smaller one. “Ma said something to me that made no sense until now.” He looked down, gathered his thoughts and met my doe-eyed stare. “Haven, she said that old love can be made new again under extenuating circumstances.” I gasped as I absorbed the words he was sharing. “These, babe, are definitely extenuating. But know that my feelings have never, and I mean never changed toward you.”

  It occurred to me right then, at that moment, he was right. And so had Dylan been. I did still loved Jude. I hadn’t ever stopped. I had loved two men at once and probably always would. I was speechless, and Jude took it as rejection. I could see the look of hope drain from his features and slowly be replaced by defeat. “I loved you since we were kids, Haven. When I found you in that crack house, nursed you back to health, I took advantage your vulnerability, and could never find the right time to share with everyone just how much I loved, still love you.” His eyes pleaded with mine, imploring me to understand.

  I touched his cheek with my free hand and stood up. I adjusted my shirt that had ridden up slightly before walking over to where Jude had just been wearing holes in my carpet. It was my turn to pace. My hands rested on my hips, my head bowed as I struggled to grasp all the words I had waited forever to hear from Jude’s lips.

  “Haven.” He came to stand next to me, not touching but close enough that he could if he reached out. “Please, say something.”

  His heart was on the line, just like the last time we stood in this position. I cleared my throat and gave him the most honest answer I could muster. “Jude, thank you for telling me all of this. For sharing Dylan’s wishes, his voice…” I choked back a sob, “I needed to hear that. His words, his request, it’s the same thing he told me before he…he died.” I was crying now.

  Jude reached for me, but I pulled back; I needed to say my piece. He dropped his arms once again and waited.

  “I will always love Dylan. But you’re right. I’ve never stopped loving you. I never will.” His shocked expression wasn’t what I was expecting. Somehow I’d told myself that Jude and I were in a good place and both knew where we stood. Apparently, my assumptions had been off the mark.

  In an instant, he couldn’t keep away from me if he tried. And I didn’t want him to. He reached forward and wrapped his hands around my waist. He lifted me up and spun me in a half circle before placing his lips on mine. “That is probably the best thing I’ve ever heard, Haven.” He kissed me again, this time a little softer. “Thank you. I promise you won’t regret giving me a second chance.” His forehead rested against mine. “I’m never going lose you again, Haven Torres. I’ll fight Satan himself to prove to you just how much you mean to me,” he claimed with fierce conviction. “I love you beyond all time and space, Haven.”

  His lips came down on mine once more, our tongues meeting for a passionate kiss that left me lightheaded.

  “Jude.” One word. I whispered, “My Jude.” I wrapped my body around his, remembering the feel of his body and how well he fit mine. Yes, I had loved and was loved by two men. Two very different men.

  I lost Dylan in body, but never in my heart. I was learning that there was room for both of them. Jude was here; he never really left, and as he held me in his arms, I realized even more about his love for me.

  He loved me enough to let me be loved by someone else. He loved me enough to stick around when I wasn’t very loveable, and to be present in my darkest hours. Not once, but twice. He saved me once, and after I lost Dylan, he did it yet again. I couldn’t think of a better man to experience my second chance at love than Jude.

  I’m doing it, Dyl. I’m loving again, just like you wanted. Thank you for bringing Jude back to me.

  I sent up a silent prayer of gratitude to the man who was still watching over me, healing me from the inside out.

  I rubbed my nose against Jude’s in an Eskimo kiss, our breath mingling, hands coaxing and caressing. “I love you, Jude.” My words came out in a sigh. “Please don’t break me.” I kissed him again.

  “Never again, Haven. I will love and cherish you always, just like you deserve.”

  Yes, I was damaged. I had eaten from the forbidden fruit and I was suffering the consequences. The scars I bared on my soul were a reminder. They were a reminder of both a tortured and treasured experience.

  I took a moment to think of my family, my friends. Their own lives and love had been that of sorrow and sometimes chaos. I’d often wondered why they hadn’t given up, why they’d fought so hard? I finally understood. Love was worth the heartache and the pain.

  When the broken parts of my tattered heart eased, I knew I’d look at those scars and smile. Knowing that even after we least expected it, there was a happily ever after, even if it stemmed from a forbidden love.

  Haven

  “I’m sweating!” I whined, dabbing my armpits with a tissue.

  “Oh, stop being a baby,” Scarlett retorted, handing me a bottle of anti-perspirant. “Everyone sweats on their wedding day. Get over it. Jude doesn’t care what you smell like anyway.”

  “Nope. He just wants to find the closet cloakroom and bang your brains out.” Teeny laughed, handing me my bouquet of roses and baby’s breath.

  “Here,” Scarlett called out before diving under my cream lace-layered dress.

  “What are you—oh, my God!” I screamed, startled by the cold spray. “What the hell, Scar?” I asked as she inched out from between my legs, holding up a spray bottle of Febreze.

  “Just making sure it smells good under there. You don’t want to be hiking up your dress and smelling like a tuna sandwich do you?” She was so matter-of-fact in her argument; I was lost for words. Teeny stood off to the side, doubled over in laughter.

  “You two are horrible bridesmaids, you know that?” I shot at them, trying not to crack up laughing.

  “Yep,” they both sung in unison.

  “Let’s go. I want to marry my fiancé and I’m afraid to be in a room with you two any longer.” I started for the door and took a long deep breath, touching Dylan’s charm on my bracelet with my fingertips.

  Thank you, Dylan. You gave him back to me. You’re always in my heart. I sent my silent thanks up to the heavens and opened the door that led out to the church.

  Truth be told, I cried a little when Jude looked into my eyes and promised in front of all our family and friends that he’d forever be mine. I never thought the day would ever come for me, but there I was, holding my husband’s hand and walking into the beautifully decorated reception room. Jaxson and Jordan walked just in front of us with Javerio holding each of their hands and giggling as he stumbled with them. Off to the side stood Scarlett wrapped up in Mace’s arms and beside them, Teeny stood beside Trip, her head resting on his shoulder, smiling brightly up at him.

  They all found their place in the world and I couldn’t be happier for each of them. They’d fought a hard battle to get there and they deserved their happiness.


  I walked in to the room with Jude holding my hand in his, and sighed. This was it. This was my happily ever after. It turned out my forbidden love was not so forbidden after all.

  This brings to an end the Needle’s Kiss series.

  Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed the ride.

  XOXO

  Lola