Lexington Black

by Savannah Smythe

  The larger man had turned in his seat, and Rob realised he was staring into the face of his eldest brother.

  'Jesus, Roger!' They hugged tightly over the shallow pew. Rob looked around him. 'Where's your wife? Couldn't she make it?'

  'Huh, this is my husband, Tony.' The slimmer man peered around Roger's bulk and gave a little wave.

  'Oh my God, why didn't you tell me? All that time we've been talking ...' He gave Tony a tight hug. 'Welcome to our fucked-up family. Sorry, I'm blown away. I just assumed...'

  'Yeah, I know. Everyone did apart from Chris. It's about time everyone else knew the truth.'

  'Looks like this is Queer Corner,' Simon said, his voice carrying over the assembled crowd.

  'You got that right,' Tony grinned at him.

  'Congratulations, both of you. We'll catch up when this madness is over,' Rob said as the organ began to play.

  The service wasn't as bad as it could have been. Only those in the know would have picked up on the tension running through the immediate family like low velocity electric current. The white doves didn't crap on anyone and the smallest bridesmaid didn't have a tantrum or pick her nose. Sara looked stunning in oyster silk and pearls and the groom didn't vomit with fright on the floor, although he looked as if he wanted to.

  As she made her stately way down the aisle, Sara's eye was caught by Caressa's outlandish outfit. She did a double-take as she saw Rob and her eyes narrowed. He blew her a kiss as she went past.

  Then Sandy passed, sombre in her role as Matron-of-Honour. She looked elegant in a long, navy blue satin dress, clutching a posy of white freesias. By the way she stared rigidly ahead, Rob knew she had seen him.

  'The ex-wife,' Rob whispered to Caressa.

  'Someone needs to tell her face she's at a wedding, not a funeral,' Caressa whispered back, not quite so discreetly.

  'That's her usual sunny expression,' Rob said dryly.

  The service passed without incident, barring the moment when Caressa dropped her handbag in the silence that followed the obligatory "If anyone has any objections ..." They received several killing looks and some giggles from the younger contingent, but otherwise, everyone in the back row behaved themselves, sort of. Although a shoving competition between Caressa and Geri almost propelled Rob into the aisle and knocked off one of the flower arrangements at the end of the pew.

  Roger turned to him, grinning.

  'You were never this fun when we were growing up.'

  'Neither were you,' Rob retorted.

  He had no intention of making a discreet exit once the service had finished. He wanted people to see him. The way Sara had banished her own brother from the wedding, just because it was inconvenient to find another Matron-of-Honour, had infuriated him. He wanted the chance to have a little fun at her expense, because God knew the whole family had suffered at her hand in the last few months when she was organising her Big Fucking Day.

  'You're getting the Evil Eye,' Geri said as they stood together, slightly away from the main crowd. The photographer was moving everyone around and the Best Man, Steve's brother, held a clipboard with a list of names on it. Periodically he bawled out a group of names and those people would obligingly shuffle forward and take their place next to the Bride and Groom.

  Rob dispassionately watched it all, not feeling as if they were part of his family at all. His family consisted of Geri and Simon, and now Roger and Tony, who stood with them. And in a strange way, Caressa felt like family too. Her arm was resting on Rob's shoulder, almost protectively as if she could tell the animosity radiating from the bridal party.

  Steve's brother headed towards them with a determined stride.

  'Alright, you've seen her get married. Now piss off.'

  Rob moved close so they were face to face. 'You need to remember who you're talking to. I'm Sara's brother, dickhead. That means I have more right to be here than you do.'

  'Yeah? Well, I've been told to get you and your freak show the hell away from here. So fuck off, both of you.'

  Caressa stepped forward. 'Which freak show are you actually talking about? From where I'm standing, there are several candidates. There's the 34JJJ boob job over there, the tattooed biker with a nose ring, and what the hell has happened to that poor lady's face! She looks like she's been attacked with a blowtorch, poor love.'

  'That's my mother,' the man said tightly. 'I won't tell you again.'

  Rob took Caressa's arm. 'We're going,' he said firmly.

  As they headed off out of the churchyard, he heard his name being called. He turned back and saw Sandy, hovering awkwardly.

  'You look ...' She groped for words. 'Great. You look great, Rob. Wow. That holiday in New York really did you good.'

  'Thanks. I fucking needed it.' He turned away, but not before he saw her blanch at his harsh language.

  'Rob, I know you're mad at me. Maybe one day you'll...'

  He faced her again. 'You want me to forget what you did? That isn't going to happen, Sandy. You treated me like shit, far worse than I ever treated you. But don't feel bad about it, sweetheart, because my life is better now than it's ever been. I would thank you, if I thought for one moment you actually did it for my benefit.'

  'So why didn't you tell me you were gay?'

  'Believe me, it was as much of a surprise to me as it is to you. Now I'm celebrating it, so if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get a drink.'

  'Is that why you're here today. To humiliate me?'

  'It's not about you. I was here for Sara.'

  'She didn't want you to come. Why couldn't you stay away?'

  'Because I was clinging on to the vain hope that this family might be able to get along together for one day. One fucking day! I was obviously wrong so I won't bother trying again. You spent the whole of our marriage telling me how you couldn't stand my family, yet they chose you over me. Fine. As far as I'm concerned, they're welcome to you. Go fuck yourself, sweetheart. Go fuck all of you,' he said loudly.

  By then, people were staring at him with horrified expressions. Caressa led him away, turning with a toss of her regal head and a swish of skirts.

  'Keep walking,' she muttered, her hand firmly on Rob's arm.

  They headed back to the Deansfield, where they were staying. Staff were running around, bracing themselves for the wedding party to arrive. Outside the dining room, a large heart-shaped sign, bedecked with white and navy blue ribbons, held the seating plan.

  In the bar, Caressa thrust a double Scotch into his hand. 'Drink this.'

  'Getting hammered won't solve anything.'

  'No, but it might make us all feel better,' Geri said behind him. She was standing with Simon, Roger and Tony. Rob was amazed to see them.

  'What are you doing here so early?'

  'We wanted you to know where our loyalties lie,' Geri said. 'Hopefully this means we won't be expected at Christmas any more.'

  'And I know we won't be,' Roger said cheerfully. 'Mother tore me a new asshole for turning up with Tony.'

  'So we snogged, right in front of her. Tongues and all,' Tony added happily. 'I had no idea English weddings could be so entertaining.'

  'The day's not over yet,' Caressa said, smiling enigmatically.

  After a while, Christopher sauntered in to join them. 'Ah, the black sheep,' he said. 'Looks like we're quite a flock now, doesn't it?'

  'We? As far as I know, you're still in Mother's good books,' Geri said archly.

  'Actually, no.'

  'Surely you're not gay as well?' Caressa asked.

  'Not to my knowledge,' Christopher replied seriously. 'I've just told Mother she's a silly old trout and she won't have any family left if she continues treating them like dirt.'

  'Way to go, bro.' Rob knew he had misjudged his outwardly stiff older brother.

  There was a lull in the conversation as everyone tried to decide what to say next.

  'I tried being gay once, but it was a pain in the arse,' Simon said gloomily. Geri thumped him, but it broke the ice.
They stayed together, drinking, talking and laughing until the other guests filtered in. Sarah and Steve stood by the door, welcoming the guests as they arrived, but they pointedly refused to acknowledge Rob or any or his party.

  Finally, the time came for everyone to sit down for dinner. Sara swept past, her nose in the air. She paused when she saw Rob.

  'Why are you here? You're not welcome.'

  'I'm staying here with Caressa. And Roger and Tony are staying as well. As Roger has travelled over 6,000 miles to see you, the least you can do is be civil to him.'

  'I don't have a problem with him. Just you.' She turned to go.

  'Why?'

  'Girls do talk, Rob. Sandy's told me all about you. How you can show your face here is beyond belief. You're just like our father. The way he treated Mother was appalling and you've done just the same to Sandy. You're disgusting.' She tossed the contents of her wine glass in his face and walked away.

  Caressa fussed around him with tissues. There was an awkward silence and then Roger said to Tony,

  'And that's why I moved to the States.'

  Everyone laughed, more out of relief than anything else.

  Geri came back, smiling like a hyena. 'I've been in the dining room, screwing with the seating plan. It's total chaos in there. What's the plan?'

  'First, we need to have another drink,' Caressa said.

  ******

  Rob and Caressa stayed in the bar, listening to the wedding meal as it progressed. They insisted that the others go ahead and eat in the main hall whilst they contented themselves with bar snacks and chatted up the attractive bartender. The speeches were long and boring. At one point, Caressa actually fell asleep in one of the comfy chair, snoring loudly. Rob nudged her awake as the guests began to mill about, heading to the bar for more drinks whilst the room was prepared for the disco.

  'Looking forward to showing everyone your New York dance moves?' She asked him.

  'You're not thinking of going in there?' Geri said, overhearing her.

  'Of course, my dear,' she simpered, with an exaggerated wink.

  'Guys, some people in there would lynch you given the smallest opportunity. Don't do anything stupid.'

  'Honey, that's why I called for backup,' Caressa said, patting her arm.

  Geri looked suspicious. 'What the hell do you mean?'

  Disco music began to blare out of the room. Caressa was grinning like a Cheshire cat. On cue, a squeal cut through the thumping bass and the bar suddenly seemed full of feathers, satin and sparkles.

  'Christ, there's enough drag queens in here to start a carnival,' Roger said, as introductions were made above the noise.

  'Now honey, you leave this to us,' Caressa said. 'If I were you, Rob, I'd stay out here. This is going to get messy.'

  'No way. I wouldn't miss this for anything,' Rob laughed.

  Caressa's eyes widened. 'Oh!' She exclaimed. 'This was nothing to do with me, I swear.'

  Rob was puzzled. 'What are you talking about?'

  Caressa turned Rob around. His mouth fell open as he stared at the man who was standing in front of him.

  Lex.

  CHAPTER 19 - Deja Vu

  He looked fantastic. Stunning, and angry as hell. I had no idea what I was going to say to him when I saw him again. All the way over the Atlantic I had thought about it. Sorry seemed so lame. I love you was too selfish. He deserved words that portrayed how much he meant to me, not how much I needed him.

  He slowly walked towards me, his eyes wide. I was gratified by that, at least. It wasn't outright hatred, which is what I deserved after the way I had lied to him.

  'Why are you here, Lex?'

  'I knew this day would be difficult for you ...'

  'So you decided to make it more difficult?'

  'I wanted to support you.'

  'I have all the support I need.'

  I fixed my gaze on Caressa, surrounded by the other queens. They glared back at me.

  'Don't you dare,' Rob said. 'Caressa's a good friend, Lex. Leave her alone. And leave me alone. I don't need you.'

  He walked away.

  'That went well,' Ruby murmured.

  I didn't know what to do. Boys don't cry. Neither do real men. That's the theory, anyway. And the theory sucked. Inwardly I was weeping bitter tears, yet my face betrayed nothing. I left the room, pushing past the queens, the brightly-clad girls with high heels and fascinators wobbling on their heads, past the over-stuffed men, trussed up like turkeys in their morning suits.

  I went out into the garden and kept walking until I reached the woods. Deep within them I leaned against a sturdy tree and let out the grief I had been holding onto since he first walked out of my life. I sobbed and pounded the trunk with my fists, cursing myself for every stupid thing I had done in my life. Even the pain from my split knuckles wouldn't ease that terrible hurt. In frustration, I head-butted the tree.

  That worked. My vision clouded. I swayed backwards.

  And was caught in strong arms and laid gently down on the ground.

  'Ouch,' he said, milliseconds before I did.

  ******

  I spent the night in hospital, not the auspicious reunion I had been planning. After a scan to make sure I didn't have brain damage, a tetanus shot and several stitches, I was bandaged-up, wheeled into a bay and left to sleep whilst they kept me under observation. I had fallen into an exhausted slumber when I felt someone touch my hand.

  'He's concussed,' someone whispered.

  'Unconscious,' another voice said.

  'What did he do a dumb thing like that for?'

  My eyes flickered open. Four anxious male faces looked back at me. One of them was Peter's, so I assumed the others belonged to his gang of drag queen reprobates.

  'You're alive! Thank god,' Peter said, plumping down on the bed. 'I bought you some grapes.'

  'I've only just got here!'

  'Honey, you've been asleep for five hours. And we've bought something else.'

  The men parted and there was Rob, casual in a black polo shirt and snug black jeans. They shoved him forward.

  'Glad you're okay,' he said, hugging me awkwardly. It was a brotherly hug, not what I wanted at all.

  'We're in hiding,' Peter confessed. 'We had to leave the hotel in a hurry.'

  'What the hell have you been up to?'

  'Well, first we sneaked into the disco and kidnapped the DJ,' Peter said, his eyes gleaming. 'He was playing all kinds of techno-trash. I couldn't stand it. So the girls grabbed him and bundled him out. Gemma here took over the decks and I distracted everyone with a superlative performance of It's Raining Men. The audience loved it.'

  'Then the younger male contingent realised what was happening and tried to muscle him off the stage,' Gemma added.

  'They lunged at me whilst I was singing, darling. What else could I have done? I beat them off with my Manolos.'

  Then there was the food fight, a conga round the grounds, and the groom snogging Ruby under the top table. When things began to get a little too lively, the four queens had beaten a hasty retreat back to their room. They had taken off their costumes and make up, so when the inevitable knock on the door came, the potential aggressors were met by four bewildered middle-aged men who had not the faintest idea what they were talking about. It bought them enough time to check out and get the hell away before anyone realised they had been tricked.

  'I had no idea England could be so much fun!' Ruby squeaked, clapping her hands.

  The door opened and a nurse walked in. 'I need to do your obs, Mr. Black.' She stared at the assembled group. 'Who on earth are you? It's way past visiting hours!'

  'We're going,' Peter said. He hugged me tight. 'See you back in Manhattan, darling.'

  The nurse waited impatiently as one by one, they embraced me and said farewell. Rob hung back. The nurse left the room, saying he had five minutes and that was all.

  'I've come to say goodbye,' he said.

  Panic gripped me. 'Where are you going?'
r />   'Connecticut. I'm on my way to the airport.' As I was processing this information, he leaned down and kissed my lips, moving away before I could hold him to me.

  'Why Connecticut?'

  He smiled gently. 'I found a house in the clouds.'

  'Yeah? Tell me about it.'

  'It's an old lighthouse in Freehaven. At the moment it's just broken floorboards but I'm going to live there and write terrible novels.' A small, sad smile. 'Peter told me about your father. I'm sorry.'

  'Thanks. It was pretty quick at the end.'

  'What will you do now?'

  I shrugged. 'I haven't thought that far ahead.' It was true, I hadn't. Sorting out my father's affairs was time-consuming enough, without worrying about how I was going to spend the rest of my life.

  Or who with.

  'Well, if you fancy a break by the sea ...' He handed me a piece of paper. I looked at, and saw that it was an address. 'I need some help making the place habitable if you're interested. But get your life sorted out first, Lex.' He thoughtfully ran his thumb over the ring I wore on the third finger of my left hand.

  'It's yours if you want it back,' I said.

  He shook his head. 'Another time, maybe. Goodbye, Lex.' He pressed a gentle kiss to my lips and walked out, leaving a cold empty space behind him.

  CHAPTER 20 - I Knew You Were Waiting For Me

  I didn't see Rob for months after our brief conversation at my bedside. There never seemed to be a good time when I could concentrate all my efforts on mending our broken relationship. Also, I guess I was scared, which was a new feeling for me. I didn't want to see him and find out for sure that he didn't want me any more. Even though he had said "maybe," in my book that was a resounding "no." Rejection sucked, so why put myself through it again?

  During that time I sold the company and all the assets that went with it, including the housekeeper, the helicopter, fleet of limousines and penthouse apartment. After Dad's death I realised I had too much of everything. It wasn't as if I needed it.

  To give myself some kind of focus, I bought a derelict building in the heart of the city. Some of the people finding themselves without a job after the company sell-off began running it as a drop-in centre, where anyone down on their luck could go in and get a hot meal and a bed for the night. I worked non-stop to get the Charles Martyn Center up and running. Did I do it to make myself feel good? Hell, yes, but also because I knew that finally, my life had begun to mean something. The day Rob had given Jerry Ford a hot coffee and a couple of dollars had shamed me. I had walked past such people all my adult life and hadn't given them a thought.