Black Regrets (A Kelly Black Affair Book 4)

by C. J. Thomas

  “This isn’t coincidence, girl.” Sylvia reached her hand out and gently touched my arm.

  Every muscle in my body stiffened as I felt my breath get caught in my throat.

  “Madam put us together.” She brushed the pad of her thumb over my skin.

  I stared at her hand on my arm, reminding myself how I’d first met Sylvia Neil. She was working the story of Blake Stone’s missing money. Her reporting connected it to Alex, then to Nash. She was good at her job and that was what kept me hesitant today—not knowing how she would decide to use the information she gathered.

  “Madam knows you’re here?” One side of my face scrunched.

  “Honey, that envelope is for me.” She laughed. “Now, c’mon in. I promise I won’t bite.”

  I followed her inside, remaining cautious. Keeping a firm grip on both the package and the shoulder strap of my backpack, I looked around the walls trying to make sense of all this. The place was incredible and certainly not something I expected her to be able to afford with the salary I assumed she made. I hadn’t been here before, so I doubted it was Madam’s. “Why did Madam send you?”

  Sylvia spun around, catching her hair inside her hand. “I work for her.”

  Her eyes sparkled like stars as she combed her fingers through the hair draping over the front of her shoulder. Though I couldn’t say it, she looked incredible herself. “You work for Madam?”

  The corners of her eyes smiled. “Don’t we all?”

  I bit the inside of my lip, feeling my cheeks flush pink. I didn’t want to answer her out of fear that I might unknowingly admit guilt to something I didn’t want any part of. I kept quiet, waiting for her to keep the conversation going.

  She took a step forward, her pumps clacking over the hardwood flooring. Counting each of her steps, I was mesmerized by how fluid she moved through the room. It was like she didn’t have a care in the world. Or maybe she knew the secrets to self-confidence better than what I was feeling today. Either way, she was style and grace.

  “I told her she should have warned you.” Sylvia smirked. “But Madam didn’t think it was a good idea.”

  My heartbeat raced as I felt confronted. I couldn’t look at her without thinking about Maria. Kelly had told me everything. Everything he believed Sylvia did with Angel to keep Maria’s murder covered up. And when I thought about how Sylvia nearly broke Alex and Nash up, I felt my fist squeeze into a tight ball.

  “No.” I shook my head. “I think this is a mistake.”

  Sylvia’s eyes narrowed into tiny slits. Her smile was still there, but it was tight. “This is no mistake.”

  Feeling my breaths grow quicker, I said, “Madam wouldn’t put us together.”

  “She would.” Sylvia smoothed her hand up my arm and squeezed my shoulder.

  I tightened as I held my breath thinking back to the conversation I’d had with Angel outside Madam’s office. Her warning rang loud between my ears—if I didn’t stop laundering money for Madam I would end up just like Tonya. “Why?”

  Sylvia stole the package out of my hands before I had time to stop it from happening. She turned her back and marched into the kitchen, peeking inside the envelope.

  “Hey!” I followed after her. “Give that back.”

  She hid the envelope behind her back as she turned to face me. “Sit down, Kendra.”

  I followed her gaze to the kitchen table. “Not until you give me that back.”

  “You’ll be leaving it with me. Regardless of whether you think it’s for me or not. So just sit your ass down.” Her lips pinched as she gave me a stern look. “There is something we need to discuss.”

  Falling into an empty chair, I stared at the pitcher of cucumber water Sylvia had prepared. Moving to the table, Sylvia dropped the package, picked up the pitcher of water, and poured me a glass. I took it, but I wasn’t thirsty.

  “Madam brought us together because she let me know that you’re after something.”

  I arched a brow.

  She nodded once. “And I have the answer.”

  “What are you talking about?” I folded my arms over my belly, leaning back.

  “You want to know why Nora killed herself?”

  I tipped forward. “What do you know? And why all the way down here?” My head swiveled around the room. “We could have had this conversation in the city. Instead you dragged my ass all the way down here and wasted my day.”

  Sylvia wrapped her lips around her glass and crossed her legs. Snickering, she said, “After you hear what I have to say, you won’t think I wasted your time.”

  Bringing my elbows to the table, I shrugged. “Then let’s hear it.”

  “This is where I work when I’m on a tight deadline.” Sylvia’s gaze drifted to the living room where she had a mess of notes and a laptop computer open on the coffee table. “So, sorry, for having you come to me,” she said sarcastically.

  Taking it all in, I couldn’t help but be curious about what story she was working on now. And who had her in their back pockets besides Madam. Because I was sure someone like her—someone with an audience ready to listen and who could change public perspective instantly—was extremely valuable to many wealthy people.

  “Which brings me to my next point,” she said.

  “Wait.” I turned back to face her. “What about Nora? You haven’t said a word about her.”

  “I’m getting there.” She flicked her eyebrows. “But, first, I know you’re aware Kelly blackmailed Parker.”

  A stone hardened in my stomach. “That’s what they say.”

  Sylvia smirked, casting her gaze to her fingers stroking the pellets of water dripping down her glass. “Then you’re also aware that Tonya was killed shortly after.”

  Her eyes lifted and met with mine. “Is that the story you’re working on?”

  Sylvia turned her head toward her computer. Lifting her hand to her hair, she made sure there weren’t any unruly lose strands disrupting her perfect appearance.

  My heart slammed against my ribs hard enough to shake my vision. I was afraid to hear what she may have discovered during her own investigation, assuming that was in fact what she was getting at and why she wanted me here.

  “Tonya was Madam’s girl.” Her voice grew softer as she turned back to face me.

  Her eyes drifted over my face before falling to my neck. Then, suddenly, she stood, rounding the table to stand over me. Without saying a word, she took the necklace Kelly had given me between her fingers, stroking the stone with her thumb. Letting it fall back between the dip of my collarbones, she went for my ears next. Shame forced me to close my eyes, knowing that she recognized the earrings to be Madam’s.

  “Kelly may not have been the one to do the deed,” she said, hovering over me. “But he certainly has his hands covered in Tonya’s blood.”

  The pounding of my racing pulse thrashed between my ears as another warning to watch my back was tossed my way. I watched Sylvia step away and head back to her seat. But not until she made sure to give me a hard glance that made my heart stop.

  “Kelly is dangerous, Kendra.” She sighed. “Affiliated with the wrong people.” She fell back into her chair and took a sip of water. “And he’s finding himself involved in something no one wants to get caught up in.”

  Each time I blinked, I saw Angel’s mouth giving me a similar warning. Suddenly, my eyelids were heavy and I felt dizzy.

  “People will blame him for Tonya’s death.” She glanced toward her laptop computer.

  Now I had little doubt about the story she was working on. But the question now became, how was she going to spin it? Shivering, the blood in my body ran cold. And with a cracked voice I said, “I know how Kelly set up Madam’s business to look legit.”

  Sylvia laughed. “My story is bigger than that, honey.”

  I glared at her, grinding my teeth.

  “But I guess the biggest news of all,” she raised her brows, “is how Kelly said nothing when he put us all on this wild goose ch
ase to track down Maria’s killer when, in reality, Wesley Reid covered up the truth of where Maria’s body was actually found.”

  My brows drew together as my body tipped forward.

  “That, my dear, is the story right there.”

  “If Maria wasn’t killed where the police think she was killed, then where was she found?”

  “A place I’m sure you know by now.”

  My eyes scurried over her face, not wanting her to see the guilt hiding in the corner of my eyes. But her knowing glare was enough to confirm she already knew I’d been there. “Mint?”

  Offering a bemused smile, Sylvia said in a joking manner, “Criminal defense lawyer Kelly Black’s buddy Wesley Reid’s nightclub. Coincidence?” Her cackle was like a whip snapping across my back. “I’ll let you decide.” She lifted her glass of water to her lips. “Though I must admit,” she said into her glass, “he sold me on his innocence with the effort he put in to disguise it.”

  Lifting my hands to my face, I buried my nose and mouth inside my palms. Shaking my head, I squeezed her lies out of my head, assuming she was basing her opinion on some ulterior motive. Staring at her, my thoughts began to travel in all sorts of different directions.

  Does Sylvia know all this because she knows who the true murderer is? Is she going to write a story, selling her theory that Kelly is the guilty party and not her? How does the DA’s office have the wrong man if what she says is true?

  Rooting my feet into the floor, I kept taking Kelly’s side, reminding myself of the man I knew he was before new seeds of doubt were planted and sowed inside my very confused head.

  “I know Kelly. And he’s not the man you think he is.”

  “You don’t know him at all, Kendra.” She raised her chin high. “In fact, if you don’t believe me, ask him yourself.”

  Turning away, I was finished listening to her lies.

  “And if he doesn’t give you a complete answer, then tell him you know about his son.”

  My head snapped back to her with pinched brows. Thinking back to the photo I found of Kelly attending a funeral with Kaycee and Nora, there was no boy with him. “Son?”

  Resting her chin inside her hand, Sylvia raised one brow. “It’s the reason he doesn’t drink. The reason his wife killed herself.”

  Pushing away, I stood and let my hand fly to my forehead. Beginning to hyperventilate I turned back to Sylvia and asked, “Why are you telling me all this?”

  She stood and held up the package. “Knowledge is power.”

  I cast my gaze to the package, wondering what it had to do with any of this.

  “And it’s time you had a little bit of your own.”

  32

  Kelly

  Sitting behind my office desk, I was buried up to my neck with paperwork.

  My visit with Wes and Adrianna had me second-guessing our entire plan. They knew all along that Mario was innocent. Which was probably the reason they allowed me to take on his case from the very beginning. If I managed to get Mario off and learn what Madam now knew about Stone’s operation in the process, great. But, if not, it didn’t matter. Like Wes said, Mario could sacrifice himself to the system. Whatever it took to ensure nothing of what happened came back to him or his nightclub, Mint.

  I picked up several old photographs from Maria’s crime scene. Heat rose behind my eyelids. I still couldn’t believe it. Wes moved her to Echo from—

  Mint.

  Setting the photographs back down on my desk, I leaned back and lifted my head. Wiping my sweaty palms on my thigh, I couldn’t get over the initial shock.

  No wonder Wes wanted to micromanage our plan to take down both Stone and Madam. He knew. Knew all along that I was working on false information. And I was only as good as what I knew. But, with him, I could be my best. That was why he made sure I needed him.

  Looking toward the door, I flicked my wrist to check the time.

  I was expecting Giselle to arrive any minute, and I still wasn’t sure how I was going to tell her about any of what I’d learned. As frustrating as it all was, it wasn’t worth my energy staying mad at Wes. I had to trust that he knew exactly what he was doing. That he had all our best interests in mind. After all, he was the only true ally I had in this big cluster-fuck of a mess I seemed to have found myself in.

  Bringing my elbows to the desk, I hunched over and continued digging through the files I hadn’t gotten to yet today, but must have looked at thousands of times before.

  There were witness statements.

  A timeline of events.

  Disturbing images of a beautiful young woman whose body had been battered and abused.

  And after a while they all swirled into one. Over and over again, I stared, read, and scratched my head. But I couldn’t stop doubting myself, thinking that maybe I had missed something that would lead me back to Sylvia Neil.

  Which got me thinking about Bella.

  I didn’t like hearing Adrianna warn me to get Kendra out from Madam’s harem. I might not have been able to understand what Kendra was up against the same way Adrianna could, but I could feel the pressure rising, the heat building. And I could see it in Kendra’s eyes when she asked me to get her out. There was fear, terror, uncertainty. None of which I wanted her to feel—let alone, experience.

  Reaching for my cell phone, I pulled it toward me from across the desk.

  Kendra still hadn’t responded and I was starting to worry that maybe something had happened to her. I wanted to protect her, shelter her from harm. It wasn’t like her to ignore me like this and that was what was so infuriating. Especially after last night’s conversation. That and the fact that I found her thinking about suicide kept me on edge.

  Sitting on pins and needles, I put a call in to Maxwell. He picked up after the first ring and, without greeting him, I dove straight into what it was I wanted to ask. “Have you found her?”

  “No, sir. I haven’t.”

  I closed my eyes and dropped my head. All feelings of hope went fleeing from my body, leaving me feeling more pessimistic than before. I needed to learn where she was and who she was with. Desperate to hear back from her, I would do anything just to know she was okay.

  “There is no sign of her,” Maxwell’s voice sliced through the line. “Not even from her doorman.”

  Rubbing my pulsing temples, I applied enough pressure to forget the headache I already had. “He hasn’t seen her at all?”

  “Not for a couple of days.”

  “Keep looking.”

  “Of course.”

  “Thanks, Maxwell.” I sighed. “And keep me updated as your search develops.”

  Ending our call, I set my cell off to the side thinking Kendra had to be close. She wouldn’t just up and bounce for the entire day without letting someone know where she was.

  Then it hit me. Like lightening striking, I suspected that maybe Madam knew Kendra’s location. But did I really want to put a call in to Madam now? I wasn’t sure I was prepared to have to deal with what she would try to get from me in return.

  Diving back into my research, I thought how Madam must have known where Maria’s body was originally found. It made sense. With as many girls as she had working for her, I couldn’t see how she wouldn’t have not known. I searched my piles of notes, photographs, and reports hoping to find a link to her but, just like Sylvia, there was nothing.

  Leaning back in my chair, I closed my eyes and thought about what Wes said. He explained why Stone had purposely chosen Mint. Motivated by revenge for what Wes did to get Stone arrested made sense. But there had to be more to it than just that.

  I stood and paced the room, deep in thought.

  Blake Stone used Sylvia to murder Maria. I got that. But how? And was Maria just an innocent victim in all this? Or was there more to her than what my papers were telling me? I didn’t know, and though I posed the question to myself, I wasn’t sure it mattered all that much. The focus of my research remained the same. Connect Sylvia Neil to the Maria Greer m
urder and prosecute her—either in the court of law, or publicly—then move on to ensuring Stone remained behind bars before shifting the fight to Madam.

  The heaviness of the situation rounded my shoulders. Suddenly, I felt weak as I lowered my tailbone to the edge of my desk. Picking up the photo of Nora, I looked to her for strength as I had so many times before.

  “Guide me, love. Be my angel.” I gently stroked the pad of my finger over her bright face. “Show me what is true.”

  The sun shined and the room lit up.

  Then complete silence.

  Staring into her face, I let everything else go. Soon, it was just us as I listened for direction. No noise. No pressure. No sense of failure threatening my health, life, or job. Just calm regrets and feelings of agony that always crept to the surface every time I looked in her direction.

  But it was the secret hiding behind her that had me wondering why I felt the need to look now.

  Flipping the frame over, I popped open the back with a racing heart.

  I wasn’t sure why I did it, but I did.

  It had been forever since I’d had the courage to look, to speak to a memory that I was often too afraid to confront. I peeled off the picture behind Nora and kept my eyes open with a heavy pulse until the child’s bright face shined up at me.

  My lips tugged at the corners as I smiled down at Patrick, our son.

  Tears filled my eyes as the guilt of what I did to destroy my once perfect family overtook me. My muscles shook and my spine bent. And though tears dripped down my cheeks, I refused to look away, knowing that he and Nora were my reason to correct all that was wrong in my life.

  Never again would I make the same mistake.

  They were my motivation.

  My strength.

  My reason to never forget the decisions I’d made. Because of them, I was the person I was today. Broken. Alone. And currently without a moral compass.

  “I’m so sorry,” I cried. “I’m doing my best to make things better.” I sniffed. “I really am.”

  A calmness fell over me as if Patrick was there in my office with me.

  “Your daddy misses you.”