Blessings

by Kim Vogel Sawyer

  Graham snorted, his grin returning. “Lester, huh? Oh, that’s easy.” He whizzed back to the floor and in moments caught up to Lester Hess. After a whispered consultation in the corner of the rink, the two lined up for a race. An excited wave of laughter carried the other skaters to the edges to watch the contest. Several heads blocked Trina’s view, and she rose up on tiptoe to peek out just in time to see Graham zing by a few seconds ahead of Lester.

  A cheer rose, and someone grabbed Trina’s hand.

  “Did you see him? He’s the fastest skater ever, I think.” Darcy’s blue eyes shone with admiration. “I wish I could skate that fast, but never in a dress.” She giggled, and Trina couldn’t help but join in, imagining Darcy trying to keep up with Graham’s long-legged stride.

  The crowd headed back to the floor, except for Darcy, who remained next to Trina and waited for Graham’s smiling approach.

  “Well, I guess I showed him, huh?”

  Before Trina could answer, Darcy said, “You sure did! That was exciting!” She crinkled her nose. “Lester is always bragging, so it’s good to see him bested now and then.”

  “I guess so.” Graham wiped the sweat from his brow. “But that wore me out. I’m ready to go now, Trina, if you want to leave.”

  Darcy grabbed Graham’s sleeve. “Oh no! Don’t go yet! A bunch of us are going for ice cream afterward. You’ll want to come.” She turned to include Trina. “Won’t you?”

  Seeing Darcy and Graham side by side on the other side of the wall left Trina feeling strangely distanced from her friends. She swallowed. “I’m not really hungry.” She looked at Graham. “But if you want ice cream, I don’t mind staying.”

  To her relief Graham shook his head. “It sounds fun, Darcy, but I worked today, and I’m worn out. I think Trina and I will go on home.” He skated around Darcy and left the rink.

  Darcy’s lips slipped into a brief pout, but then she shrugged and shot Trina a grin. “Well, I’ll see you at service tomorrow.” Her smile turned impish. “Maybe I’ll go console Lester on his loss in that race.” With a laugh, she skated off.

  Graham approached, skates dangling from his hand. He pointed to his gray-stockinged feet. “I’ll get my boots on, and then we can go.”

  She nodded, shifting her gaze to watch the skaters for a few more minutes. A part of her longed to rush onto the rink and laugh and chase with abandon, but another part of her only wanted to go home. With a sigh, she turned from the wall and stood beside the bench where Graham pulled his boots over his socks. When he’d tugged his pant legs back over the boots, he looked up at her. A sad smile played around the corners of his mouth.

  “This wasn’t much fun for you, was it?”

  Trina’s chin trembled as she fought tears.

  He rose, taking her hand. “Come on. We can talk in the car.”

  When the door closed behind them, sealing away the noise of the other skaters, Trina heaved a sigh of relief. She shook her head. “I never realized how loud we were. Was it always so. . .uncontrolled?”

  Graham laughed, swinging her hand as he led her to his waiting vehicle. “Yes, and you were usually in the middle of the ruckus.”

  Did she detect a note of regret in his tone? He opened the car door for her, but she stood beside the car and peered up at him. “Are you upset about leaving early?”

  “No.” The answer came quickly. “Time alone with you is precious, so I don’t mind heading out.” He put his hand on her back, giving a gentle nudge. “Slide in there.”

  When he was behind the steering wheel, he sent her a sympathetic look. “I noticed most people avoided you tonight. I’m sorry. I guess they’re not comfortable with the direction you’re taking, and they don’t know what to say. So they say nothing.”

  Trina nodded. Her friends, with the exception of Darcy, had been distant. But, she acknowledged, she’d distanced herself, too. She couldn’t blame them entirely. “I know. I understand them. I just wish I understood me.” Shifting her gaze, she stared at the building that housed the skating rink. All the times Mama made her stay behind, she’d longed for the opportunity to go. Now she could go, and she longed to be away. With a soft laugh, she added, “I must be going through one of those ‘stages’ Mama used to complain about. I don’t know what I want.”

  “Yes, you do.” Graham gave her hand a tug, bringing her focus to him. “You want to serve God by taking care of animals. And you want me to be your support system.” His smile grew. “Well, you’re getting what you want. So let’s see a smile on your face.”

  Obediently, Trina offered a smile, but she suspected it lacked luster.

  Her suspicion was confirmed when Graham snorted. “That’s a pretty poor excuse for a smile. I guess I’ll just have to buy you a double-dip chocolate ice cream cone. That always perks you up.”

  After Graham purchased two double-dip chocolate cones at a dairy store’s drive-through window, he aimed the car toward the highway and home. Trina kept her window up while she ate her cone to keep the dancing tails of her cap from landing in the chocolate, but the moment she finished, she rolled it all the way down and put one hand out.

  The pressure of the cooling evening air against her palm sent a tremor clear to her shoulder. She experienced a sense of strength, keeping her hand braced while the coursing wind tried to push it back. If she could hold that wind at bay, surely she could overcome the difficulties facing her as she moved toward her dream.

  “Trina?”

  She pulled her arm inside and turned to face Graham.

  “I’m glad we have this time alone. I need to talk to you about something.”

  His serious tone sent her heart pattering. She scooted to the center of the seat, away from the wind’s whistle, so she could hear clearly. “Okay.”

  “You were talking about not having enough money to finish your degree.”

  She nodded. In her daily prayers, she had petitioned God to help make a way to cover all of the expenses.

  “I think I know how you can do it.”

  Trina’s eyes flew wide. “You do?”

  “Mm-hmm.” His gaze flitted sideways, a twinkle in his blue eyes. “You’ve never been upstairs in my folks’ house, but when Dad built it, he made the second floor kind of like an apartment. My grandmother was living with them when he and Mom got married, and he wanted her to have her own space that felt like a separate house.”

  Trina nodded to let him know she was paying attention, but she couldn’t figure out why he was telling her about his parents’ house.

  “Well, Grandmother died when I was still small, so Mom and Dad moved me up there after Chuck was born. Chuck has those rooms now, but there’s the second bedroom downstairs still, which he could move into again.” Graham removed one hand from the steering wheel and placed it over hers. “Which leaves the upstairs open.”

  Trina shook her head. “But what does that have to do with paying for college?”

  His hand tightened. “Just listen, okay?” Another quick glance combined with a wink held her silent. “I built my house for us to live in when we got married, but we don’t have to have our own house if we live in the upstairs at my folks’. If I sell my house, then—”

  “No!” Trina jerked her hand free, pressing it to her chest. “I can’t let you do that!”

  Graham’s lips turned downward. “Why not? As your husband, it should be my responsibility to help pay for your needs. And education is one of your needs.”

  “But, Graham! I—” And then it occurred to her that he’d referred to himself as her husband. She gulped. “Are you wanting to be married right away, then? Even before I finish school?”

  He shrugged with one shoulder, the gesture boyishly appealing. “Well, if you don’t have a whole house to care for—if we live with my folks—it would eliminate one responsibility, giving you more time to study. And it would also mean you wouldn’t need to go off to college by yourself. I would go with you, get a job, and support you while you finished your schooling.
”

  Trina’s mind whirled. She had worried about going off alone, had fretted over putting off their wedding for so long, but now that another option was available, she didn’t know what to think.

  “Your parents said it would be all right for us to live with them?”

  Graham smiled. “Mom’s never had a daughter, so she was especially thrilled to think you might live with them for a while.”

  “And your dad? He didn’t mind, either?”

  Graham chuckled softly. “Well, to be honest, Dad thinks I’m a little nutty, building a house and then selling it, but he didn’t say I couldn’t do it. He said if it was what we wanted, he’d be okay with the decision.”

  “And Chuck isn’t unhappy about losing his room?” Trina thought about how Tony would feel if he were kicked out of his bedroom. There would certainly be resentment. She didn’t want to live with that.

  “Chuck is fine. He’s only been up there a year or so—and he’s young enough to think it’d be neat to have me home again.” He shot her a serious look. “It wouldn’t be permanent—just until you have your degree. Then I’d build us another house.”

  Trina chewed her lower lip, her mind racing. “But would anyone buy your house?”

  “There is someone interested.” For a moment Graham didn’t answer, his fingers curling briefly around her hand before slipping away to grasp the steering wheel. “Walt. For him and Michelle. They’re getting married in early February, you know.”

  Although the words were delivered on a light note, Trina sensed an element of sorrow. She imagined Michelle working in the kitchen Graham had designed for her, and she understood the undertone. A lump filled her throat. “Oh, Graham. . .”

  “It’ll be all right.” The glib tone didn’t fool her. “After all, it’s just a house. Not really a home until a family lives in it, and we haven’t had that chance yet. So after you’ve finished school, we’ll build another house, and we’ll move in, and it’ll be home. It’ll be fine.”

  Tears welled in Trina’s eyes, and she turned her face to the window to allow the wind to dry them. Her face aimed away from Graham, she said on a sigh, “You’re giving up so much for me.”

  His fingers cupped her chin, bringing her face around. “I’m not giving up anything I don’t want to—nothing I can’t live without. You’re more important than ten houses—you know that.”

  His hand found hers, and she clung to it, welcoming the contact. “Thank you, Graham.”

  “So. . .if you agree. . .then we need to talk to the deacons. Get published. And start planning a wedding.”

  “A wedding. . .” Trina shook her head, wonder filling her. Soon she’d be Mrs. Graham Ortmann and a veterinarian. How could her heart hold so much happiness at once?

  TWENTY-ONE

  The first Sunday in October, the acting minister published Graham and Trina to the congregation, making known their intention to become husband and wife. Although Trina noted the well-wishing didn’t seem quite as exuberant for her as it had for Michelle only a few weeks earlier, she managed to swallow the prick of disappointment. Changes were hard for many in the fellowship, and she would need to be patient until they accepted this new road on which she was embarking.

  Mama, in preparation for the announcement, had invited Graham’s immediate family plus Trina’s grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins to dinner at the café. Dad had grumbled a bit about opening the café on a Sunday, but Mama pointed out there wasn’t enough room at the house. Plus she wasn’t serving paying customers— she was treating the family to a celebration. So Dad nodded and agreed.

  Nearly all of the tables and booths were filled, and when Trina tried to help serve, the ladies shooed her from the kitchen. “Go sit,” Aunt Marie said, taking her by the shoulders and giving a gentle shove. “Soon enough you’ll be serving Sunday dinner to your own family. For now, let us spoil you a little bit.”

  So Trina joined Graham’s family, Dad, and Tony at the table in the middle of the dining room and allowed the others to wait on her. Mama had prepared all of Trina’s favorites—meat loaf, mashed potatoes with lots of butter and fresh chives, steamed whole green beans flavored with slivered almonds, crusty rolls, and lime Jell-O holding together chopped apples, pecans, and celery. Filling her plate, Trina wondered if she’d have room for the German chocolate cake Mama had baked for dessert.

  Conversation around the many tables and booths filled the café with happy noise, and Trina missed Mrs. Ortmann’s comment. Trina leaned closer, raising her eyebrows in a silent query for her to repeat the words.

  “Has Dr. Groening agreed to sell you the clinic when he retires?”

  Trina stifled a sigh. “No, but he hasn’t come right out and said he won’t, either.” Trina recalled the lengthy discussion concerning the future of the clinic. While she understood the doctor’s reluctance to commit to another five years of work, she still wished for the security of knowing the clinic would be there waiting for her. “He’s sixty-eight years old already, and he isn’t sure he wants to continue for five more years.”

  Mrs. Ortmann nodded, sympathy softening her expression. “I don’t suppose a person can blame him. He’s taken care of animals in our community for many, many years. He’s earned a break.”

  Trina agreed wholeheartedly. Dr. Groening had been a dedicated servant and was well liked by all of the area residents—Amish, Mennonite, and worldly. She would have some big shoes to fill when she took over the clinic.

  Graham’s father inserted, “I can’t imagine there’s anyone else around here who would buy the place. I haven’t heard of any young people in the nearby communities planning to go to veterinary school.”

  Trina’s heart tripped hopefully. “I haven’t, either. Even though I’d prefer a commitment from him to let me take over the clinic, I have to trust God will work things out. After all”—she flashed Graham a smile—“He’s worked everything else out.”

  Tony reached to the middle of the table for another roll. “And who knows? If Trina makes good, maybe the bishop will say it’s okay for others of us to go to school. I think it might be fun to go to college, too.”

  Trina put her hand on Tony’s arm. “I’m not doing this for fun, Tony. If God hadn’t put the desire in my heart, I wouldn’t be pursuing it.” Her brother’s cheeks flushed even though Trina kept her voice gentle. “You need to pray about your future and follow the plan God has for you instead of looking for fun.”

  Dad harrumphed under his breath, the sound barely discernible.

  Trina hung her head, battling tears. The celebratory mood darkened with her father’s reaction. Why couldn’t he see she hadn’t set out to hurt him by following her heart? Why couldn’t he allow her to follow God’s leading without making her feel guilty?

  Graham’s warm hand on her shoulder brought her head up. Graham leaned forward to address her father. “Mr. Muller, I know you still harbor concerns about Trina going to college.”

  Dad’s brow furrowed into a scowl. “You’re right.”

  “I want you to know I was very concerned, too, but prayer gave my heart peace. I will continue to pray for your peace.”

  Silence fell around the table, although talking went on animatedly at the other tables. Everyone looked at Dad, who kept his gaze on his plate. Suddenly he pushed his chair back and dropped his napkin on top of his uneaten food. “If you’ll excuse me.” He strode from the restaurant. Mama jumped up and followed him.

  A knot formed in Trina’s throat, and she swallowed hard, willing herself not to cry. Too frequently tears had been her companion of late. She did not want to cry today—not on the day she was published to the man she loved. With effort, she lifted her chin and forced a bright smile. “Tony, pass the green beans, please. Mama outdid herself today—everything is so yummy!”

  To her gratitude, the others followed suit by talking again, filling the uncomfortable silence with cheerful chatter. In minutes, Mama returned, sat down, and sent Trina an apologetic look. Trina shr
ugged, offering a silent reply, and they finished their meal without commenting on her father’s absence.

  When everyone had finished, Tony and their cousins Andrew and Jacob and their wives volunteered to wash dishes and put the café back in order. Graham gave Trina a gentle hug good-bye at the door.

  “Do you want me to come over to the house with you?”

  She knew he was asking if she would need support in facing her father, and her heart swelled with gratefulness for this understanding man. But she shook her head. “No. I’m going to have a talk with Dad—somehow I must make him understand why I have to follow my heart—but it needs to be between the two of us. In fact. . .” She scowled, glancing past Graham to her mother, where she chatted with Uncle Henry and Aunt Marie. “I’m going to see if Mama will leave us alone and let us work this out for ourselves. She means well, but she tends to interfere.”

  Graham smiled, releasing a light chuckle. “Your mother interfering? I can’t imagine that.”

  Trina laughed, recognizing the teasing. “Yes, we all know her well! But I love her anyway. And since this whole thing started, she’s become such a surprising support. I feel as though I finally have the mother I always wanted. I’ll never complain about her again.”

  Graham quirked one brow.

  She laughed again. “And someday you’ll probably need to remind me I said that. But for now. . .” With a quick glance around, she rose up on tiptoe and planted a quick kiss on Graham’s smooth cheek. “I’ll go talk to Dad. Pray for me?”

  “Of course.” He squeezed her hand.

  Mama willingly agreed to give Trina and her father some alone time, and she went to Uncle Henry’s. Trina headed home, praying all the way for a reconciliation of her relationship with her father. When she entered the house, she found Dad in the living room on the sofa. A newspaper lay in his lap, but his eyes were closed, his head back.

  Trina cleared her throat, and Dad jumped. He opened his eyes and peered around, focusing on her. Immediately a frown formed on his face.