Awakening

by Rebel Miller

  After another heavy round of debate, it was evident that the panel would vote against subordinate representation. My shoulders slumped and I felt the urge to look for Tai. Chancing a glance behind me, I found him seated at the back, with his elbows on his knees, intently watching the proceedings. Every fiber of my being lit up when, after a moment, his eyes shifted from the panel to me. I ducked my head and was staring blankly at my tablet when the high chancellor’s next words quieted the room.

  “Why don’t we hear from someone who was, in fact, working on the proposal before us,” he said, steepling his hands on the table.

  I glanced toward Gabriel to find him readying himself to speak. He cleared his throat and waved a hand above the mic located on the table.

  Glancing at the document before him, the high chancellor said, “Subordinate Metallurgist, please come forward.”

  I swiped through my tablet. Obviously, I had heard incorrectly. No doubt I had become delusional as a result of my deep embarrassment over leading Gannon and Gabriel down this foolish path. I had encouraged a recommendation for subordinate representation, and we were about to have the proposal rejected. I was cursing the All Above when the volume of the murmurs around the room swelled. I frowned and looked around, seeking the cause for such increased chatter. One by one, people turned to look in my direction. I swung my gaze back to the panel.

  “Subordinate Metallurgist,” the high chancellor said, “please approach the panel.”

  Gabriel swiveled slowly in his chair toward me, a look of utter disbelief on his face. I was sure my face was an exact reflection of his.

  Stunned, I looked at the high chancellor, who nodded, confirming that he was indeed speaking to me.

  With my heart lodged firmly in my throat, I collected my tablet and stood. I decided to walk slowly toward the center of the room where a podium was positioned, allowing the high chancellor time to correct his mistake, but, unbelievably, I arrived uninterrupted.

  I glanced around at Gannon, who was now behind me. I had never seen him so tense. With a deep breath, I looked over the rest of the onlookers; they were starting to quiet down, eagerly awaiting the outcome of this unusual occurrence. Before turning back to the panel, I spotted Tai, now standing, a fierce scowl on his face.

  “Subordinate,” the high chancellor began, “you were heavily involved with this proposal. Perhaps you could provide your opinion on subordinate representation.”

  “I —” I paused, dropping my gaze to the podium. I activated the mic with a shaky wave of my hand above it, then started again. “All of the details on the requirements of the law have been included in the proposal. It captures my interpretations as well as those of the Prospect minister and chancellor.”

  He sniffed. “Young lady, I’m quite familiar with the law,” he said. A few guffaws sounded around the room, and he silenced them with a look. “I’m interested in knowing what you think a subordinate could bring to the table.”

  “With all due respect, high chancellor,” interrupted Xavier Minister of Hale Five. “We have more important matters to discuss. As she said, her ideas are in the proposal. We should simply go to vote.”

  “Minister, allow me to remind you that I’m responsible for chairing this special meeting. I will determine when a vote should be taken,” he said. The minister sat back, glowering. “Subordinate, please proceed.”

  I swallowed past the constriction in my throat, a forewarning of an impending attack. One of the things that helped me keep my panic attacks at bay or hidden was to think about people or things that gave me comfort: my family, friends, being by the lake or staring at the sky in the late evening. I lowered my head, closing my eyes briefly as I inhaled deeply. When I reopened them, I turned slightly to look at Gannon, whose gaze was steady on me. He narrowed his eyes and tilted his chin up toward the panel. I immediately straightened my spine and faced the panel. After taking another restorative breath, I looked at each of the panel members as I spoke.

  “One of the first things I learned while in training was that governance and law are based on three things: transparency, accountability and openness. During my time at the Judiciary, I’ve seen some of the inner workings of our system, a system I am proud to be a part of because of its weighed and measured arguments.” I brought my gaze to the high chancellor’s. “We ask every one of our subordinates for strength, resolve and adherence to the Realm, but we deny their involvement on many levels.”

  “They have participation within the system, subordinate,” he remarked.

  I nodded respectfully. “Yes, at the region council level. But when it comes to Realm Council affairs, subordinates are excluded. Then we’re asked to pay the penalty for the corruption of others.”

  “Subordinate Metallurgist,” Xavier Minister said. “We have all heard this argument before, from other subordinates and indeed from citizens of other castes who are, dare I say, more experienced than you.” He looked to the rest of the panel. “We don’t need a lecture on the faults of our system. The Realm is structured according to an order that has been well thought out and that has worked for hundreds of years.” A few ministers thumped their agreement on the table.

  I flushed, slighted by his dismissal, and took a step back.

  “But these are different times, are they not?” Gannon’s voice cut clear across the room. I looked behind me to find him standing.

  “Gannon, you’ve not been given the floor,” the high chancellor said with little heat.

  “Forgive me, but as you stated a moment ago, I worked closely with Subordinate Metallurgist. Her contribution is there in the document in front of us for all to see — ideas equal to mine and those of the Prospect minister. Why not invite other like-minded subordinates to contribute as well?” he challenged, stepping forward, close beside me.

  “It will create confusion in our system,” said Abigail Minister of Septima Nine. “It’s just not done.”

  “Then why was the law put in place?” Gannon pressed. “Our founding guardians gave us the freedom to involve all castes. Are you questioning their intention and foresight?”

  The room erupted into animated discussion, both from the panel and the audience, comments for and against the recommendation, but it became clear we had not moved the panel enough to our side. The high chancellor himself appeared on the fence in the face of some of the more strident remarks against subordinate involvement. Overall, I discerned, these sentiments were based on a fear of change and of setting a precedent of empowering subordinates. All of a sudden, I had a moment of clarity.

  “Subordinates are angered by the Realm Council’s decision to expel even innocent citizens of their caste for Argon’s corruption,” I said loud and clear. The room quieted. “As we speak, they are thinking of ways to rise up against the system. Not just subordinates from Argon, but those from the other dominions as well. Subordinate representation would be a way to placate them.”

  Gannon stared at me, no doubt taken aback by my ominous declaration, but then I saw that he understood. I was speaking their language. They wouldn’t do it for the Subordinate caste, but they would do it in protection of the Realm.

  Gannon looked back to the panel. “This is your opportunity to restore faith in our governance and law, our very way of life.”

  * * *

  Meet me in the main hall.

  I’d received Gannon’s message ten minutes earlier but was still caught in conversation with a number of subordinates and, to my surprise, with a few members of the media who had converged on me upon adjournment. One particularly keen woman from the local media was asking very probing questions, which, in my excitement, I couldn’t even begin to respond to adequately.

  With a vote of eighteen in favor and fourteen against, the ministers had approved our proposal, including our recommendation for subordinate representation. I had hoped for such an outcome, but now that it had actually happened, I could hardly believe it. Now the proposal would be brought to the Realm Council for their review,
but it should be only a formality. There would be some deliberation, but with the high chancellor representing the Council and involved in the process from the start, the Corona would find it difficult to move against it.

  I extricated myself as politely as I could from a new group of inquiring minds and made my way to the main hall where I heard another message arrive on my comm.

  To your left, down the hall, then to your right.

  I smiled and followed his directions. As I turned right, I received another message.

  Straight ahead, then turn right. Enter 245 to engage the door.

  It was a good two minutes before I arrived at the door. I entered the code and it slid open. Stepping inside, I found an unexpected surprise.

  What I’d expected to be a meeting room was a greenhouse overrun by an exotic mix of flowering plants, which covered the ground and much of the walls. The foliage painted every corner and stretched up to a glass ceiling that allowed in the early-evening light. Beyond it, stars already emerged through the duskiness of the encroaching night. In the center of the peaceful conservatory, wooden benches surrounded a small water fountain that gave off a delightful trickling sound. A mossy grass carpeted the ground, with stones laid every now and then, forming a pathway that led from the door deep into the garden.

  “It’s called a revelation room,” Gannon said, walking out from an overgrown arbor behind me. “They use it to meditate and think on their decisions. At least that’s what Gabriel told me during our tour.”

  He stood before me and, in the shadows, looked larger than life. My heart fluttered. I looked away quickly, craning my neck back to look to the stars.

  “It’s beautiful,” I said.

  “I knew you’d like it. I remembered what you said about watching the night sky and exploring new worlds.”

  I lowered my gaze to his, humbled that he’d remembered something I shared with him weeks ago. I smiled.

  He quirked his lips in response. “You were unbelievable today,” he said, holding my gaze.

  “So were you,” I said. Heat seeped into my neck and cheeks.

  “I didn’t do anything.”

  “We wouldn’t have gotten so many votes without your contribution.”

  “Yes, you would have,” he said stubbornly. “I only followed your lead.”

  I made a face and walked over to the fountain. Kneeling down, I ran my hands through the water pooling in its ceramic bowl. A few colored stones littered the bottom and glimmered, brightly colored fish playing hide and seek around them.

  “Your father — he used me, didn’t he,” I asked, peering up at him from my stooped position.

  Gannon exhaled deeply.

  “He has veto power over the ministers,” I added. “He could have approved the proposal without my input.”

  “Yes.” He crossed his arms. “But now it’s not on his shoulders. We have the ministers’ approval as well.”

  I nodded, looking back at the fountain. I’d figured as much. “I just hope that I’ve not set my fellow subordinate up for failure.”

  “What do you mean?”

  I stood, still watching the flow of the water. “Realm Council will judge the subordinate representative harshly. Any misstep could set my caste back, never again to be invited to that level of discussion.” A fish dashed after a smaller one. I smiled when the smaller one took cover behind a stone.

  Wondering at his lack of response, I turned to find Gannon standing close behind me.

  “We’ve worked together for weeks now,” he said, staring at me, his blue eyes glittering like light on water. “And all I’ve thought about doing is kissing you.”

  I inhaled deeply and stood speechless. All Above, he was unrelentingly beautiful! No matter how advanced our technology, my monitor didn’t do him justice.

  Gannon and I had developed a long-distance rapport over the few weeks we’d been working together. It was more than friendship, but I’d held off on letting it becoming truly intimate, despite Gannon’s advances, always bearing his caste in mind.

  He stepped forward slowly, assessing me. He seemed to be gauging my response. With a mind of its own, my hand rose and my fingers ran across his bottom lip. Gannon took a swift breath, as if my unsolicited caress had surprised him. He turned his face into my palm and grabbed my wrist, placing a kiss on the inside of it. Encouraged by my resulting smile, he pulled me to him and ran a palm up my back then slipped his hand into my hair, his fingers curling into it. I watched, mesmerized, as the color of his eyes deepened and he lowered his mouth to mine.

  It must have been the excitement of the day’s events or the enchantment of the garden. The truth was, I wasn’t sure why I allowed Gannon to kiss me when all I had been doing over the past few weeks was push him away. But when his lips met mine, I was glad I had. It felt natural, like breathing, and I didn’t want him to stop.

  As his mouth slanted across my own, becoming more aggressive, I wound my arms around his shoulders and rose up on my toes to deepen the kiss and flatten myself against his chest. My nipples puckered so tightly I was sure he could feel them through the thin fabric of his shirt. With a groan, he roughly ran a hand over my breast, hardening the bead even further. The heat from his body matched my own, and he rocked his hips against me, pressing his thickening erection into my belly. I squirmed, trying to get closer to him still. As he licked into my mouth, I squashed thoughts about consequences and what was happening outside of the glass walls surrounding us to focus solely on how wonderful Gannon was making me feel in that moment.

  Abruptly, he stopped and glanced behind me. I ran my tongue over my lips in a daze, leaning up for more even as the energy in the room shifted. His eyes focused and narrowed. With a frown, I glanced behind me just as the door to the greenhouse slid shut.

  “You selfish fuck.”

  Tai stalked into the space as I watched, stunned. He came over to us and gripped my elbow, yanking me behind him, and he used his other hand to shove Gannon, striking him firmly in the middle of his chest.

  I cried out, more in shock than pain, trying to twist my arm out of his grasp.

  “Did you put her up to this?” He leaned into Gannon’s face.

  Gannon’s eyes were glacial as he looked from my arm, still imprisoned, back to Tai. “Let her go,” he said through clenched teeth. He was about an inch or two taller than Tai, but what he had in height, Tai had in bulk.

  Tai’s lip curled. “Fuck you.”

  Gannon shoved Tai, who stumbled back, forcing him to release his grip on me. Recovering quickly, he lunged at Gannon, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and pushing him against an ivy-covered wall. Tai punched him in the gut and Gannon grunted as he doubled over.

  I ran over to them and pulled at Tai’s arms, but it was useless. I was struggling against a man who trained every day to maintain the physical requirements of the Protectorate.

  Tai continued to pummel Gannon, who, after shifting his position, managed to land a number of healthy punches on Tai, stunning him. Having gained the upper hand, Gannon grabbed Tai by his shirt collar and started to force him to the ground, but Tai used the momentum to flip his position and hold Gannon down, with one hand tight around his neck. Gannon stared defiantly up at Tai, his eyes like chips of ice. The veins of his neck bulged from the pressure of Tai’s hold.

  “Five years too late,” Gannon sneered, unyielding even in the face of his disadvantage.

  Tai visibly stiffened and I watched in horror as he raised a clenched fist, aiming it at Gannon’s face. I knew from Tai’s own accounts that that same fist had maimed many men. Desperate, I changed tactics and tried to appeal to whatever remained of Tai’s sense of logic.

  “Tai!” I leaned over him and pulled at his fist. “He’s a senator, damn it!”

  His fist paused midway through its descent, but he seemed to be debating whether to continue or not.

  “Tai, think of your career, you can’t be charged with abusing a senator,” I said in a rush. “They’ll dismiss you
, your status will be revoked.”

  For a few moments, only our panting breaths and the light trickle from the fountain could be heard in the stillness of the garden. Slowly, Tai lowered his fist, his eyes boring into Gannon’s. He took a deep breath before pushing himself to a standing position, then reached down for my arm and dragged me up to him.

  “Let’s go.” He pulled me into his side.

  I stared up at him, dumbfounded by this unnecessary violence. Then I pushed him away and looked over to where Gannon was now standing. He straightened his jacket with a fierce tug and ran a hand through his hair, pushing back the disheveled locks. I hurried over to him to assess the extent of his injuries.

  “Kira, come here,” Tai ordered.

  I ignored him with a scowl as I ran my hands over Gannon’s jaw, shoulders and chest. Gannon’s eyes were focused firmly on Tai, a smug smile shadowing his lips.

  “Kira!”

  I swung around, my hands clenched. “What do you want?”

  Tai drew back, disbelief clear on his face. “You’re allowing this ass-hole to use you?”

  Gannon lurched forward, but I placed a hand on his chest and stood firmly between the two of them in the hope that my presence would keep any further violence at bay.

  “He’s not using me, Tai. I wanted him to kiss me.”

  Tai stood, confounded. “What?”

  The confusion blooming on his face told me that Tai hadn’t seen Gannon and me kissing when he arrived. He was irate for some other reason.

  Tai raised his gaze slowly toward Gannon and a chill ran through me. I had never seen him look so menacing. His hand clenched and I knew he was going to strike Gannon this time, senator or not.

  Then he stepped forward, crowding me. Gannon must have relished the thought of a renewed fight, because he too took a step.

  Caught between the two of them, I pushed them away. “You’re crushing me,” I said. They both looked at me, as if they’d just remembered me, and backed away quickly, concern on their faces.