Playing Doctor

by Cathy Yardley

  How hard can this be?

  She opened the door, and he stepped in quickly, closing it behind him before too much of the cold air could come in. “Thanks,” he said quickly, unbuttoning his coat. “It’s a hell of a lot colder up here than it is in Long Beach.”

  She smiled. “Can I make you some cocoa?” she asked, then looked at him from under long, auburn lashes. “I mean, I just made some for my friend Kyla a little while ago, and I’ve still got plenty on the stove.”

  “Sure, I’d love some.”

  He followed her to the back of the store, into a kitchen that was painted a pale apple green. It had old fashioned looking appliances and a big, sturdy oak table. He sat down at one of the chairs as she got out two mugs and then used a wooden spoon to guide the cocoa from the pot to each vessel.

  He thanked her, and then watched as she took the seat next to him. She looked nervous, as well.

  “You okay? With me being here, I mean?” he asked, taking a sip of cocoa. “This is great, by the way.”

  “I’m fine with you being here. Really,” she said, and he wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince him, or herself. Guilt stabbed at him again. “Like you said earlier, it’s nice to put a face to the name. I mean, we’ve known each other for years.”

  “But it’s never quite the same until you meet someone in person,” he admitted. You’re trying to reassure her, jackass. So be reassuring! “I’ve wanted to meet you for a long time, actually. I’m glad that we finally get the chance.”

  “What made you drive all the way up here, anyway?”

  He took another swallow of cocoa, thinking over his answer. How to not sound like a psycho stalker or someone who was trying to take the treasure from her? “Curton confirming the clue,” he finally admitted. “We’re close. Or more to the point, you were close. I’m just along for the ride.”

  “Hey, talking it through with you helped me get there,” she demurred.

  “No, you’ve just got a really good head for this,” he said. “If you could’ve been out there in the field, I bet you would’ve found it by now, or you’d be really damned close.”

  That blush again. That damned blush. He didn’t think he’d ever even noticed women blushing previous to her. He refused to let himself get distracted by it, but it was hard.

  “You said you wanted to help me find it,” she said, warming her hands around her mug rather than drinking from it. “Did you mean it? Or, well, what did you mean by that?”

  So they were just getting down to brass tacks. He put the mug down on the table, mirroring her. “I’ve done some searches in the past. And I’ve taken some time off of work. He said maybe we’re a day away, and right now I can go out and look for it. But you’re the one who can interpret the clues, who knows the book inside and out, and who can help me stay on track.”

  “Let me make sure I’m getting this,” Cressida said. “You’re saying I’d tell you where to go, and you’d go fetch it for me?”

  This is where it got sticky. “Well… I mean, I thought we could… um, split it.”

  He saw her eyebrow go up, and he quickly plowed forward.

  “I know, you’re the brains of the organization. But I’d be the one out in the field, actually running the clues to ground and digging up the treasure.”

  “I don’t think he actually physically buried it,” she interjected. “But I see where you’re going with this.” She shot him a funny look, like she was weighing his words.

  “I’ll be honest, it’s not all altruistic. There’s stuff I need, and the treasure would help with that.” For example, keeping his mother in the United States, if Killian was serious about his threat. That would be priority number one.

  “I know. You said if you got the treasure, you’d like to go to med school,” Cressida said, surprising him.

  He was startled. He’d mentioned that in passing last year sometime, when they were talking about what they might do with the treasure. “You remembered that?”

  “Of course.” She sent him a gentle smile. “I admire that about you.”

  He felt warmth pulse through his chest, even as another stab of guilt hit his stomach. “I do want to help you,” he said. “It would be an even split. Or, um, maybe I could take lower…” He paused. Why was he talking about a split? Why was he acting like he’d give up the treasure if his mother needed it?

  Guilt pecked at him. He ignored it.

  “No, I think fifty-fifty is fine,” she said, and he felt relief hit him like a tidal wave. She was going to go for it!

  Until her next words. “But I don’t want you to be my guy in the field.”

  “You don’t?” He tilted his head, studying her. She looked like she was gearing up for something, frowning slightly and biting her lip. “Then… wait. I don’t understand. What do you want me to do?”

  “I want you to work with me to find the treasure.” She took a deep breath, then crossed her arms. “I want to go out there. With you.”

  He stared at her. “No offense,” he finally said, his brain still mulling it over, “but how? I thought you couldn’t, or don’t, leave the house…?”

  She let out the breath she’d inhaled. “Did you see the RV parked outside?”

  He nodded, vaguely remembering a camper parked next to the house.

  “It belongs to my friend Kyla, the one I made cocoa for,” Cressida said. “Anyway, a few years ago, I read about some agoraphobic people having luck with RVs. As long as they could consider them safe spaces, it helped. For me, it also helps that they’re small and self-contained. It took me months to get out to the RV, and a full year to be comfortable enough in it to go on trips, but it was very freeing.”

  He looked at her in awe. “That’s fantastic!”

  She looked down at her mug, smiling. “Thanks. It was hard, but it was worth it.”

  He felt like hugging her. He’d known how hard she had it – or at least, he knew from what she’d told him when she felt low. He admired the hell out of her.

  “Anyway, I asked Kyla if we could borrow the RV,” she said, her eyes meeting his. There was a set to her jaw that showed she meant business. “I can’t drive – I’d need your help with that. Honestly, I’ll just need your help getting to where we want to go. But I can get a better idea when we get closer to the spot. I’ll be able to see landmarks, and…” She worried at her lip with her teeth. “I can do this. I want to do this.”

  Admiration warred with concern. “You don’t even really know me,” he couldn’t help but point out. “And this would mean traveling with a strange man, over a thousand miles, in a small RV.”

  “I know.” She took a nervous sip of cocoa.

  “Your sisters probably shit kittens when you told them about your plan, am I right?”

  She snickered. “No,” she said, then looked down at the table. “Probably because I haven’t told them.”

  “You haven’t told them?” He thought of the fiercely protective women he’d encountered earlier that day. “This is a bad idea. I don’t want to get arrested for kidnapping you, and I get the feeling that’s the route they’d go.”

  “I am an adult,” she said, her tone brooking no argument. “I know I have… well, a mental condition. I have pursued treatment for it, and yeah, it’s a pain in the ass. But it doesn’t mean I’m incompetent. And it doesn’t mean that someone else has to make my frickin’ decisions for me.” She sounded fierce, and he got the feeling this was something she’d run into a lot in the past. “If they have a problem with it, I’m sorry. But I’m doing this to help my family. And they can respect that, and me, or they can just…just… well, they aren’t going to stop me!”

  “I can tell you mean that,” he said quietly. But guilt and worry bubbled up inside him. “So, how far have you gone in the RV?”

  She swallowed visibly. “Um, Puyallup. That’s an hour, hour and a half away.”

  “That’s not far.” He grimaced. “And how long were you out?”

  “To be fair,
not longer than a night or two when we were out on the road,” she said. “But I’ve spent a week there over the summer. Parked, um, here.”

  He closed his eyes. Now guilt was a tangible thing, choking him. How the hell was he supposed to find the treasure, and then take it from her?

  “This can work. I promise,” she said quickly, leaning forward and taking his hand, surprising him. “I’ve worked hard to prep for this, and I’ll take care of myself. I won’t let you down.”

  He squeezed her hand, hard.

  “I’m sorry,” he heard himself say. “But I think the answer’s gotta be no.”

  Noah’s rejection hit her like a brick.

  “Why not?” she asked, crossing her arms.

  He looked like he was struggling with his words. “We’ve known each other for a while now. But in a lot of other ways, we don’t know each other at all. Do you really think the first time we meet each other face to face is when we take a road trip together down the West Coast?”

  She shrugged. “Lots of other people do crazier things. And this is for a good cause. We both want the treasure. I don’t know about you, but I need it sooner rather than later.” She thought about telling him why – the house, the whole nine yards – but she didn’t want to play into his sympathies just yet. “This is about me, isn’t it? The agoraphobia, the anxiety?”

  “I’d be lying if I didn’t say it had me worried,” he replied. “I know how hard you’ve been working to manage it, and I think you should be able to make your own choices. But… I don’t know. This seems like a really big leap for you, and considering how badly you want the treasure, I don’t know if you’re making the decision with the right rationale behind it. I don’t know if you’re rushing into this.”

  “I am rushing into it,” she said. “But I’ve got good reasons.”

  He leaned forward, looking into her eyes. His eyes were deep, velvety brown, and his gaze covered her like a caress. “I want to help,” he said. “I’m just not sure this is the way.”

  She felt frustration welling up inside her like a geyser. She tried to think of a different tack to take. “Remember how I told you I’m a huge Doctor Who fan?”

  His expression lightened, even though he looked a little puzzled. “How could I forget? You made me watch all those Christmas specials, and quizzed me on them,” he said. “I’m not as big a fan, but at least I made it halfway through the eleventh doctor. But what does that have to do with this?”

  “I started watching Doctor Who when I was around twelve years old,” she said. “For someone whose whole life revolved around fear, The Doctor was someone I wanted to be. He traveled where he wanted, to whatever time period or planet or whatever he wanted, and he always had his home with him… the TARDIS. ‘Bigger on the inside,’ as he says. He brought his safe zone with him.” She smiled. “Kyla had me in mind when they repainted the RV to look like the TARDIS. It’s my safe zone. And it’s what’s going to let me go on adventures and travel where I want.”

  His smile was slow and warm. “And that is awesome,” he said. “But…”

  “But you think I’m going to implode before we leave the state line,” she interjected. “And I can’t say that I won’t. I can’t promise you that I’m not going to have… an episode, or something. But I can say that I’ll handle it on my own, you won’t have to worry about it. It’s not like I haven’t dealt with it before.”

  “That doesn’t make me feel better,” he muttered.

  She frowned. “All right. I didn’t want to put it this way, but – our landlord is putting our house up for sale. I need the treasure to buy this place, so I don’t have to move.”

  He looked immediately sympathetic. “Jesus. That sucks.” He paused, then his expression grew dogged. “But that doesn’t mean that you couldn’t work with me remotely.”

  “What if you get crappy cell reception in the desert?” she countered. “You won’t be able to send me video, and without seeing the places, I won’t be able to put together the clues!”

  “Do you really believe that,” he said, his voice a little suspicious, “or is it because you don’t trust me to take the treasure and leave you high and dry?”

  She bit her lip. “Maybe a little of both,” she said, her chin tilting up. “You’re the one that keeps pointing out we barely know each other.”

  “If you can’t trust me now,” he said, sounding exasperated, “then you definitely shouldn’t trust me to be in an enclosed space with you for, what, a week, at least!”

  The thing was, she did trust him. She didn’t think he’d hurt her – and that was saying something, since given her background, she was on high alert for just about anything hurting her. But they had gotten to know each other. It might be her internet crush talking, but her inner voice said that she would be safe with him no matter where they went. And in her heart, she doubted he’d cheat her.

  But I want to go.

  “Maybe it’s to prove something to my sister,” she admitted slowly. “Maybe it’s just so I can go and have my own adventure – be like The Doctor, or better yet, River Song. The Doctor’s wife,” she clarified. “The eleventh Doctor’s wife, anyway.”

  “I remember,” he said. “I’m just not sure that I’m the one you can do all this with.”

  And there it was: her opportunity.

  “The boards saw that confirmation by Henry Curton,” she said, pulling out her trump card. “If you don’t want to take me, I’m pretty sure I can find any number of other people who would love to split the treasure with me.”

  His eyes widened a fraction. “You’re saying you’d go off with some stranger?”

  “I don’t want to,” she countered. “But I’m out of options. I’d rather go with you, someone I know and trust, than with a rando from the boards.”

  He stared at her, weighing her words, checking to see if she really meant it. The thing was, she did. She wasn’t bluffing. And there were dozens of people she could think of from the Curton boards that would leap at the opportunity. They’d be less trustworthy, and she’d have to be even more careful, but she was running out of options.

  He grimaced. “Fine,” he said. “I’ll go with you.”

  She leaped up and hugged him, surprising both of them. She quickly turned him loose, feeling a blush heat her cheeks. “Thank you,” she said, the words edged in tears. “You have no idea how much this means to me. I’ve packed. Let me grab my stuff, and we’ll get going.”

  “Tonight?”

  “The sooner we can head down there, the better,” she said. “If that’s okay with you?”

  He pursed his lips, his expression thoughtful. “I could probably get us down to Vancouver,” he said. “We’d need to find an RV camping spot or something to spend the night, but it’d get us that much closer to California.”

  She felt joy, fierce and sharp, shoot through her, and she had to stop herself from hugging him again. “You can leave your car here,” she said. “The keys are in the RV.”

  “You’re leaving a note for your sisters, right?”

  She nodded. Not leaving a note seemed like a dick move, and they were going to be upset about her decision anyway. She needed to tell them, but calling would simply create drama and take time. She’d save that for later.

  “All right. Let me get my stuff out of my car, and we’ll get going.”

  She ran upstairs to her bedroom, getting the bag she’d packed and the extra bedding. As she juggled, she thought about Kyla’s requirements.

  You don’t really know this guy. Not “in real life” knowing.

  Still, he seemed just like she’d perceived: kind, caring. He’d been worried about how well she’d fare on the trip. He seemed reluctant to split the treasure with her, even though he was right – she couldn’t do it without him, and she needed his help. Compensation for that made total sense.

  She doubted she needed it, but she squirreled through the camping gear and pulled out the bear spray. She knew that, if Noah somehow turned out
to be untrustworthy or some kind of rapey asshole, she’d be able to protect herself.

  As if that were going to be necessary, Cressida thought. He was already treating her like she was some kind of fragile sugar-glass. She doubted he’d make a move on her.

  What if you made a move on him?

  The thought made her snicker. What were the odds?

  Still, she stopped in the hallway, just for a second. He was ridiculously good looking, with his dark hair and those dimples and his broad shoulders. She felt her mouth go dry, and she reflexively licked her lips.

  Then she put her stuff down, ran to the bathroom, and grabbed condoms from Hailey’s stash. She stuffed them in the side pocket of her duffel bag.

  Not that I’ll need them, she told herself. But after all, she had made a promise to Kyla.

  Chapter 4

  “I think the campgrounds are really close,” Cressida said, her voice hopeful.

  Noah gritted his teeth. It was almost two o’clock in the morning, and he was exhausted. They’d run into some night highway construction that had closed four lanes down to one, making the drive take even longer, and the last two campgrounds they’d tried to stop at had been closed for various reasons. He’d already driven hours that morning, getting to Snoqualmie… now, he’d just put in another five hours on the road, getting used to the relatively large size of the TARDIS RV, and he just felt bone tired and irritated.

  She wants an adventure. She’s desperate for the treasure.

  She would’ve gone without me.

  Of all the things that were rankling him, that last bit probably topped the list. He wasn’t sure how serious she was, but the idea of Cressida approaching someone else on the Wastelander boards caused a knot of ice to form in his stomach. Surely, she had to know how dangerous that was. He was friends with other Wastelanders, sure, but he also knew that for a lot of them, the hobby bordered more on an unhealthy obsession, especially for those who were desperate for money. God knows what they’d do with Cressida.