Love Notes (Rocked by Love #1)

by Susan Scott Shelley

  Zander nodded. "You were happy with Dom. I'd rather see you happy than resenting us down the line because you missed out on something good with him."

  "No. I need to make sure nothing else goes wrong. I need to be in my usual all band, all the time mode."

  He handed over the sunglasses. "You were popping meds because of your all band, all the time mode. I was an idiot for not seeing it. Maybe I'm a perfectionist with music, and you are with, well, everything. But we all should've insisted on you sharing the workload, no matter how hard you fought to manage it all yourself."

  "You guys have to handle the music and the fans, and you get so caught up in it and lose track of everything else… And Brendan's even worse with remembering about being on time for things, and Luke and Landry—"

  Raising his brow, Landry held up his hand. "Luke and I aren't helpless. We're not as lost in our own world as Zander."

  "Hey, I managed to handle the flight and car for this trip, didn't I?" Leaning forward, he cuffed the back of the bassist's head. "And I didn't say things would be perfect. If something gets messed up, it gets messed up. That's why you also need an assistant. Someone like Jayne who double-and triple-checks things." He glanced at Luke. Hurting his friend was the last thing he wanted to do. "But maybe not actually Jayne—not right now, anyway."

  Luke turned toward the window. "Don't let me stand in the way. I'll deal with it…better than I did before."

  He hoped so. Jayne mattered to him, more than anyone ever had. He loved her. Choosing between Jayne and his band would be painful, awful. He didn't want to lose them, but he couldn't lose her.

  Irisa nudged Luke's shoulder. "Any news on Seth?"

  He nodded. "Griffin texted me. Seth's awake, and going to do a lengthy rehab stay once he gets out of the hospital."

  "I'm glad he's okay. Hopefully he'll get the help he needs." She patted his arm, then twisted toward Zander. "So what are we going to say to Vance, anyway?"

  "Leave it to me." He rolled his shoulders as the massive estate came into view.

  He'd been to Vance's house a few times before and had made friends with the security guard. After a few minutes of small talk, the guard waved them through. Vance had granted the all-clear for his biggest client. The son-of-a-bitch acted like he was king.

  "Let me do the talking." Zander followed the guys out of the car. Together as a unit, they ascended the stone steps.

  The front door swung open. Vance DuBrow stood before them. His slicked-back hair, tinted glasses perched low on his nose, and scowl were at odds with his colorful golf attire. "To what do I owe the honor of this visit?"

  Zander took the older man's sneer with a nod and crossed his arms over his chest. "When you have your lackey tell my sister that she needs to resign from being band manager or you're going to kick us off the tour, you can bet I'm going to have a problem with that."

  Luke flanked Irisa's other side. "We all have a problem with that."

  Vance gestured for them to come inside, and they crowded into the foyer. "I've always liked you guys, but lately you've been in the spotlight for the wrong reasons."

  "Lately, we've had some extenuating circumstances." Landry stood shoulder to shoulder with Luke and Brendan stepped up beside Zander. Solid support and a united front..

  After nodding at the drummer, Zander turned his gaze to their host. Money drove Vance's every decision. Channeling his anger, Zander aimed for the man's bank account. "Here's the thing, Vance. We're a package deal. My sister stays. I'm sure you thought about the money. If you kick us off, you can expect the fans to be pissed and for sales to fall. But if you're ready to do that, then we're ready to part ways completely."

  "You can't walk away. You owe Excite one more album."

  "Then throw together a greatest hits collection for all we care. You won't get any new music. If you're so ready to wash your hands of us…" He shrugged and let the threat hang in the air.

  Lips pressed together, Vance stared at them for a long moment, stroking his chin.

  Zander widened his stance, meeting old man's stare with matching intensity. "I expect you to be straight with me. Have those extenuating situations you mentioned been cleared up?"

  Zander glanced at the guys. They could pull off the rest of the tour. They nodded and his sister answered, "Yes."

  "Do I have your word that nothing else will happen?"

  Irisa stepped forward and Zander followed suit, ready to back her up. "You've known us for ten years. That should count for something."

  Ten years. Too damn long for them to lose all they'd built up. Too damn long to let anything come between them. Yeah, they needed a break, but not a break up. Zander rolled his shoulders. One tour out of all those years couldn't sink them. Yeah, they'd been stupid. He didn't expect Vance to be sentimental. The man looked at the bottom line and money won out over anything else.

  Vance gave them a slight nod. "All right. Then you can stay on the tour."

  Half of the battle won… Zander raised his brow at Vance. "With Irisa."

  "With Irisa," Vance confirmed.

  Zander laid his hand on her shoulder. He'd promised to help ease her workload, and Vance had the power to remove one of her biggest headaches. "One more thing. I don't want us to have to deal with Oliver anymore."

  "Why?"

  "He oversteps a lot, and he makes my sister uncomfortable. I'm not okay with my sister being uncomfortable."

  In the corner of his vision, his sister smiled and the tension in her shoulder eased.

  "Fine. Done." Vance glanced at her, and then his gaze spanned the rest of the group. "Anything else?"

  "We didn't eat on the plane." Brendan flashed a smile and Zander laughed. "I'm a little hungry."

  Irisa stifled a groan. "Brendan, we're not making Vance feed us. We'll get something at the airport." She extended her hand to Vance. "Thank you."

  He nodded and returned the shake. "I expect a decent report on the next show."

  "You'll get one."

  "Then get outta here and earn your pay. Your rock'n roll dramatics made me twenty minutes late for my tee off."

  When they returned to the car, Irisa hugged him. "No more Oliver. I think that deserves it's own celebration. Thank you for doing that for me. For the first time in years, I won't cringe when I deal with Excite."

  "Hey, you look out for us, I'm just returning the favor. No one fucks with my family."

  They arrived at the airport an hour before their flight. Zander and Luke grabbed coffee for the group while Irisa, Brendan, and Landry went looking for breakfast. After securing seats for the others, Zander settled into an uncomfortable chair across from Luke and stared at the steam rising from the cup in his hand.

  He'd helped save his band. The guys were getting along much better. Things would have been perfect but he still didn't have Jayne.

  Luke nudged Zander's chair with his boot. "Call her. Tell her to come back."

  Zander swallowed a mouthful of coffee, then balanced the cup on his knee and regarded his friend. Luke looked like hell. "Are you really going to be okay with that?"

  Slouched in his chair, legs kicked out in front of him, Luke nodded. "I'll deal with it, and I won't be an ass this time. She's important to you, and I don't want her hating me or refusing to see you because of me."

  He'd never forget Jayne's teary-eyed, defeated expression. "She'll need a lot of convincing before she'd agree. If she even agrees."

  A light sparked in Luke's eyes. "I have an idea."

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  The community center was a flurry of activity. Jayne stood in the music room as old instruments were hauled away. The shipment Zander had promised Kate had arrived. Guitars, three drum kits, mics, amps, even a new piano. Her throat thickened when she touched the keys. He'd done that for her.

  It looked like she'd have a lot more time for piano lessons. Vendetta's manager called to inform her that the band had canceled their summer tour. They were taking a break, citing artistic difference
s. Was every band she connected with doomed for failure?

  Footage of The Fury's concert from the previous night had surfaced, and she couldn't get the image of Zander and Luke throwing punches on stage out of her head. She had to be the reason. The temptation to reach out to Zander was strong. Her phone held the two voicemails and texts he'd left. Call me. I need to talk to you. And, Stop being stubborn and answer the phone. We can work this out. I need you.

  Torn between missing him and doing what was best for him, she didn't know what to do. And music, her lifeline, just reminded her of Zander and the mess with the band. Her reflection in the window caught her attention. Being a strawberry blonde had been fun, but she missed her platinum locks. Change your look and change your life. She'd tried that once, going for the red tint after Pepper had died. Life hadn't worked out well as a redhead.

  Three hours later, after a trip to the salon, she was back to being blonde. And she couldn't get any blonder than the platinum locks. Blondes have more fun. She needed fun, but more than fun, she needed something to go right.

  She sat at the piano, playing with a version of the song Zander had written. A knock at her door broke her concentration. She checked the peephole, blinked, then checked again, sure she was seeing things. Nope. He really was there. Trepidation rose like a ball in her stomach. Why was he there?

  Only one way to tell. She flipped the locks and eased the door open.

  Luke towered over her, for once not wearing his usual scowl. "Hi."

  "How did you get in here?"

  "Your neighbor held the security door open for me. Can I come in?"

  Too many question swirled in her head. She nodded and stepped back. Patch, far from being a guard dog, ran to the bedroom.

  He shoved his hands in his pockets. Then withdrew them and sighed. "Look, there's no easy way to say this. I was an asshole to you and I'm sorry."

  "Um… Okay?" She frowned as he paced her living room.

  Coming to a stop in front of her piano, he faced her. "I won't be one anymore. I swear. Please come back on tour."

  "Wait. What? Why would you of all people want me back?"

  "One—Zander needs you. You mean a hell of a lot more to him than anything else. And, two—you're really good at your job. Irisa was headed for a breakdown and you saved her. The band needs you."

  "But you don't like me. You're always so—"

  "Awful? I know. I'm sorry. It was never anything personal against you." He shoved his hand through his hair. "You remind me of someone I lost. Seeing you every day was a continual reminder that I'd fucked up something special and lost it for good."

  The pain in his eyes tugged at her. "I'm sorry."

  A bitter laugh escaped his throat. "I don't deserve your forgiveness or your pity. I know that, believe me. But despite what you've seen, I'm not usually an asshole."

  "I did notice that, actually." She eased her hip against the side of the couch. "I'd see these glimpses of kindness when you were with Irisa or Dalton and wonder what I did to make you hate me."

  He touched the framed photo of Pepper on her desk. "It was never about you. I wish I could redo the last few months. There's a lot I'd change. A lot."

  She knew the band had a show in Sacramento that night. "Do the guys know you're here?"

  "They know. Zander and I had a long talk. We're fine now. Except for the part about you being here in L.A. and not up in Sacramento with us." He walked to her window showcasing her view of the mountains. "Zander's never brought someone on tour. I get that you were working with us and not some chick who tagged along, but it's still the same thing. He's never been so wrapped up in someone before. It's obvious you're special to him. He was ready to leave the band for you. It kills me knowing how much of a mess I made and that you were going to give him up."

  "It was either that, or watch the band break up, and I couldn't do that to him, not after seeing how much you guys mean to each other."

  He turned to face her. "I've seen the way you two act, how you are. You go out of your way to make sure we're happy. Zander does that for you too. You've been doing little things to take care of each other since day one of the tour. Bottom line, you guys make each other better. You need each other. Don't throw that away. Not for anything."

  She hugged herself. "I don't want to agree to come back and then have the same problems again."

  "I swear it. Even if I have to duct tape my mouth shut." He smiled.

  "Please be kidding. I don't know how you'd manage to sing that way."

  He rubbed his hand over his face, his expression a combination of weariness, sadness, and loneliness. "I can't promise I'll be happy and cracking jokes all the time, but I know how bad I messed up before. You have my word that nothing else will happen. I'm dealing with my problem. You make my best friend happy. I'd like to think we'll be friends someday but I know it might take a while for you to trust me."

  Hope stirred in her chest. "I'd like that."

  "I do, too. So does this mean you're back with us?"

  "What about the other guys and Irisa? I did bail on them. They may not want me back."

  "This might convince you." He opened the door. Irisa, Brendan, and Landry crowded into the doorway. She didn't see Zander.

  Irisa entered first and caught her in a hug. "I was so worried you'd hate me. Of course we want you back. The rest of the tour is going to be so much better, I promise."

  When Irisa released her, a grinning Brendan hugged her. "Glad to have you back. My gummy bear stock is running low."

  "But, it's only been a day since I refilled them."

  He shrugged. "Things happen."

  "He lost them to a kid at the airport." Landry was next in line, more subdued, but he gave her a smile. "But more important than that, welcome back."

  She swallowed hard and turned toward the source of the drama. Blue eyes sober, Luke extended his hand. "Again, I'm sorry."

  "Apology accepted." She placed her hand in his. A handshake equaled a promise. They'd start over with a blank slate. "Guys, where's Zander?"

  "Behind you." Zander's voice filled the room.

  Heart in her throat, she slowly turned.

  A muscle worked hard in his jaw. He looked exhausted. "Welcome back."

  She swallowed several times to hold back her tears. "Zander."

  He turned to his band. "I need to talk to Jayne alone."

  One by one, they filed out of the room. Luke closed the door at his back.

  "The blonde suits you." His gaze held hers. He treaded close enough for her to smell his scent, close enough for her to touch him but she resisted.

  "I needed a change." She reached for her pendant and her hand closed over the heart he'd given her.

  His stare shifted to her clasped hand holding his heart, then back to her face. "I need you back. Not just as tour manager. I need you by my side, in my life. I love you."

  Her throat thickened. "I love you, too."

  His hands dove into her hair and his mouth fused with hers. Jayne strained closer, winding her arms around his neck, then sliding one into his hair. His tongue licked along the seam of her lips. She opened for him, stroking the wet heat, angling for a deeper taste. She missed him. It didn't matter that they'd only had a short separation. In her heart it had felt as deep and wide as an ocean. His arms around her, his hands roaming along her back, his scent, his taste—all of that felt right. As necessary to life as oxygen or food.

  "Missed you." He murmured the words between kisses trailed along her jaw.

  "Me too." She tugged his shirt up and slipped her hands under the fabric. Warm skin, hard muscles, a fast-beating heart.

  Knocking interrupted their reunion.

  "Guys," Brendan's voice came through. "We're going to miss our flight. Save the make-up sex for when we get to the hotel in Sacramento."

  Heat flushed into her cheeks. Jayne buried her face in Zander's neck. "Oh my God."

  "Don't worry, I'll kill him." He pulled back and nudged her chin until her g
aze met his. "And then we'll take up his suggestion when we get to the hotel."

  Her body yearned for the welcoming heat and sensations of joining with his. "I think we should do that part first."

  He groaned and pulled her tighter against him. "I like the way you think."

  The arena buzzed with energy. Waiting in the wings, Zander felt it in his bones. Excitement, adrenaline, contentment, feelings swirled together in preparation for the final show of the tour. They were home, and closing out the tour in L.A. felt right. Everyone could sleep in their own beds tonight.

  Jayne brushed by him, her hands full of t-shirts for the evening's giveaway. Having her back meant everything. He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her in for a kiss. "I can't wait until I get you alone in that hotel room tonight."

  He'd booked a suite in a hotel close to the arena so they could begin celebrating the end of the tour as soon as possible. Plus, he wanted to spoil her with the five-star treatment she deserved.

  "Break a leg out there. But don't break anything else. I have plans for you for later." She leaned into him for a moment before continuing on with her task.

  Once Irisa had released her stranglehold on her duties, she and Jayne and the band had worked out a balance. More importantly, his sister had worked out her relationship with Dom. The sparkling diamond on her left hand glinted under the stage lights.

  Beside him, Dalton shadowed Chad, watching as he tuned a guitar. The kid looked a hell of a lot happier than he'd been when Zander first met him. Dalton and a lot of the kids at the center would benefit from the band's donations of instruments, money, and time. He had gotten every member of the band on board to help out with lessons there, and had pledged to support the center with whatever they needed going forward. He finally felt like he was making a difference, and that was all thanks to Jayne.

  Luke wandered over. "Are you going to do it tonight?"

  He shook his head. The purchase Luke had accompanied him to buy that afternoon was safely hidden in his suitcase. "I had an idea for doing it when Jayne and I get home from the hotel tomorrow morning. Maybe you could help me out?"