The First Cut: A Dark Psychological Thriller (Gushers Series Book 1)

by Chuck Buda

  “Relax. I need you to do something for me.”

  Ryan grinned sheepishly. “No problem. Doing is my specialty.” His arm drifted over the back of the seat, attempting to curl Zoe into his chest.

  Zoe slapped his face.

  Ryan recoiled with a hurt expression on his face. He stroked the reddened cheek she had struck.

  “Stop fucking around. This is serious.” Zoe exhaled and paused a moment to collect herself. She was angry Ryan had caused her to lash out. Now she would have to smooth things over in order to win him to her bidding.

  “Sorry for hitting you. I’m really upset and I need you to listen. We can deal with your groping later.” Her apology appeared to be acceptable, especially once she hinted at petting afterward. Ryan would listen if it meant he could squeeze her tits later.

  “Aiden wants to quit The First Cut.” She blurted it out. As the words sunk in, Ryan winced as if he bit into a lemon.

  “He wants to quit? Why?”

  “All he said was he felt uncomfortable.” Zoe explained with wildly gesturing hands.

  “Uncomfortable getting hot pussy? What a douche.”

  Zoe frowned at Ryan’s crass language. The sex was much more than just the physical act. Although, it didn’t surprise her that Ryan only saw the surface of it. “Let’s keep it on a twelfth grade level, shall we?”

  Ryan nodded an apology. He sat up in his seat, more interested in finding out what Aiden could be thinking.

  “I want to get to the bottom of Aiden’s request. Something seemed weird about the way he said it.” Zoe contemplated the conversation before continuing. “That’s where you come in.”

  Ryan raised his eyebrows in wonder. “What? Like you want me to talk to him? Convince him to stay?”

  Zoe shook her head as she bit her lip.

  “Oh, you mean rough him up a little. I could do that. I kinda like Aiden though. I hope you don’t want me to beat him too much because I wanna still be friends with him afterward.”

  Zoe kept shaking her head. Ryan watched her, and she knew he was confused about her expectations. She wanted to see if he could figure it out. The game made her evening more enjoyable. Zoe compared waiting for Ryan to understand what she wanted to watching a puppy in front of a mirror. The puppy would chase the reflection in the mirror and bark at it. And their expression matched Ryan’s.

  She gave up waiting. “I need you to keep your eye on him. See who he talks to. Where he goes.”

  “Like spy on him?”

  Zoe tilted her head. “In a way, yes. I don’t want you to tell him you’re tasked with watching him. And I don’t want you to harm a hair on his head.” Leave that to me, Zoe thought.

  Ryan seemed relieved he wouldn’t have to hurt Aiden. Zoe felt it was necessary to confirm how Ryan should handle the task, just in case he couldn’t figure that out either.

  “Keep your distance so he doesn’t even feel like he is being watched. The key is to be very stealthy. As if you’re a ghost.”

  Ryan got excited. “Oh, I have this awesome make-up kit from a few Halloweens ago...”

  Zoe pressed her hand to his chest. “No. No disguises or anything else stupid. Just watch him. From a distance. Quietly. Understand?” Zoe stared at Ryan, burning holes in his skull for compliance.

  “Got it.” Ryan gestured as if he zipped up his lip and threw away the key. Zoe rolled her eyes. She thought for a moment she might have been better off tasking this to Todd or Spencer. She needed Spencer focused on the rituals and ceremony prep. The problem with getting Todd involved was Zoe would have to use some sort of leverage with him too. She was already using sex with Ryan, so it was easier to package it in with their little deal. She hoped it wouldn’t cost her in the long run. Otherwise, Ryan would have to watch his back the same way Aiden needed to.

  Zoe looked at Ryan’s puppy dog eyes. She understood exactly what he was groveling for. And she had expected to deliver it in order to maintain his loyalty and incent him to keep tabs on Aiden for her.

  “Before we fuck, promise you will tell me everything you observe with Aiden as soon as you see it. Nothing in writing. No emails, no texts. Call me and give me detailed reports. I want to know every minute detail so pay attention.”

  As she wagged her finger in Ryan’s face, he unbuttoned his jeans and began preparing for the fun. Zoe clucked her tongue and climbed into the back seat of his car. She slid her hands along the leather seats. “You get all the blood out of this thing?”

  “Yup.” Ryan panted as he fought his clothes and shoes in the small front seat. “Took me a whole day to scrub it and wash it. Then I took it for detailing.” He clumsily climbed over the seat and began pawing at Zoe’s breasts. She leaned back against the seat and allowed Ryan to do what he wanted. She would leave the undressing to him. And the foreplay. And the sex. She had lots of things to think about. And the rhythmic action of Ryan’s humping would provide her with a perfect backdrop to focus on getting her hands around Aiden’s scrawny throat.

  Chapter 44

  Zoe closed her bedroom door. She threw herself on the bed and closed her eyes. Leading people was tiring business. She liked the control and being on top, but it was hard work. She wondered how Generals like Patton did it. Making sure all the pieces were in place where you needed them to be. The timing of the moves had to be precise. The ownership of communication flow, pristine. Exhausting, she whispered to the empty room.

  Ryan had finished his business. Not in record time, but she was thankful it hadn’t gone on too long. Now that she was shaved clean, things tended to get a little sore. Luckily, Ryan was able to complete his mission without extending into a period of soreness.

  Zoe had figured out what she wanted to do with Aiden. He would become a sacrificial lamb for their party. It served two purposes, both of which were critical to the objective of The First Cut. Primarily, it cut the cancerous limb away before it festered and turned gangrenous, infecting the rest of the group. Just as important, it served as an example to the others. Dissension and quitters would not be tolerated. Everyone knew they were committed to each other as friends and to the group as loyal members of a closed organization. If it became too easy for people to join or leave, then the sanctity of The First Cut would be in question. And all things down the line would lack meaning and importance.

  Aiden had to be dealt with. Swiftly and harshly.

  The thought reminded Zoe she needed to speak with Spencer. She had to fill him in on Aiden’s exit so he wouldn’t be blind-sided by the news. Zoe would keep her intents under wraps, but Spencer should be informed of the general issues involved in the group. She felt tired and just wanted to crawl into her bed. But she had to talk to Spencer. And she had to shower Ryan’s filth from her skin.

  Zoe dialed Spencer and waited for him to answer. She rubbed her puffy eyes as Spencer picked up the line. Zoe started off with asking Spencer to update her on preparations for the upcoming meeting. She had learned from an article she had read somewhere about a football coach who used a sandwich method to relay bad news or feedback. The coach would start off with something positive, then apply the criticism, and follow it up with another positive message. She employed the same technique herself.

  “Excellent. Sounds like things are on track for our best meeting yet.” She paused and chewed on the inside of her cheek. “Spencer, we ran into a small issue this afternoon.”

  “How small?”

  “Small enough to be swept away, but big enough to cause irritation.”

  Spencer waited in silence on the other end. Zoe continued.

  “Aiden told me he wants to quit The First Cut.”

  “Quit? Why?”

  “That’s the million dollar question, isn’t it? I refused him permission but I have a feeling he will challenge me.”

  Spencer chuckled. “Aiden? He can’t challenge a marshmallow to stay puffy.”

  Zoe found Spencer’s analogy funny. “I told him the only way he could quit was if he quit in person, to ev
eryone’s face, Friday night. I don’t think he has the backbone to stand before the group and walk away.”

  “What are you going to do if he goes through with it?” Spencer sounded interested in learning her plans for Aiden.

  Zoe told Spencer she had Ryan keeping tabs on Aiden until Friday. She asked Spencer if he would pull double duty and make sure Ryan didn’t goof up. She wanted Spencer to keep a close eye on both Aiden and Ryan. Just in case Ryan did something to jeopardize her plan. Spencer agreed to help out. He questioned why she had trusted Ryan with this information and given him such an enormous responsibility to tail Aiden. Zoe wanted to keep her sexual incentives under the radar so she lied to Spencer. Zoe used Ryan’s energy and athletic prowess as reasons for choosing him. Laughing, she threw in a barb about how easy he was to control, making Spencer chuckle as well. He repeated her sentiments about Ryan being easiest to manage.

  “I don’t want this task to deter you from your true purpose. I need your absolute focus on the prayers so we can achieve the contact we desire. If watching these two slows you down at all, I need you to get back to me immediately so I can move pieces around. You are too important to our goals. We can’t afford to waste your time or energy.” Zoe smiled to herself. She used the sandwich method and changing the “I’s” to “We’s” to solidify Spencer’s importance to The First Cut. But mostly, to her.

  Spencer promised he would be able to handle both chores. He confirmed that if any problems crept up, he would let her know right away. Zoe felt relieved. She knew she could count on Spencer because he wanted something greater out of this group like she did. It made her life much easier having a true partner in creating something spectacular. Zoe giggled to herself. She had always thought of Spencer as a nerdy nerd and she never would have guessed his weird stories and books would have become so important to her life.

  She wished him a goodnight and hung up the cell phone. Zoe wished she could stay right in place and pass out. But she needed to shower before dirtying up her sheets. Zoe began disrobing and tossing her used clothes in a pile behind her bedroom door. She decided to bring the laundry downstairs in the morning. She barely had energy to take off her clothes and shower. Zoe pulled on her bathrobe and made her way to the bathroom. The hallway was clear and she heard her parents downstairs, talking loudly over the commercial which blared from the television.

  Closing the bathroom door, Zoe stood before the mirror over the twin sinks. She leaned closer to inspect the bags under her eyes. For the first time in her life, Zoe noticed something dark behind her pupils. It was more of a sense she had, as opposed to seeing an actual color. The eyes stared back from the glass. Vacant. Hollow. Dark.

  She shrugged and dropped the robe on the towel rack. Her attention was drawn to the cut inside her thigh. She followed the itchy groove with her fingertips. The wound still burned a little to the touch. Ryan had chafed it a little, but he didn’t notice it. Or if he had noticed, he chose not to bring it up. Zoe clicked her fingers over the ridges of thread poking through the skin like the stitches on a football. As much as the cut hurt, something about it exhilarated her as well.

  It had been a cleansing. An opening into another dimension.

  Zoe smiled at the stitches. She winked at herself in the mirror and climbed into the shower. The hot water felt wonderful and refreshing. She enjoyed the image of Ryan’s grime washing down the drain, leaving her pure and whole again.

  Chapter 45

  Ryan drove through town, meandering across neighborhoods and the business center downtown. He needed to tell Todd about the Aiden dust-up. Their usual meeting spot was too risky, in his mind. He knew the chances were slim of Zoe heading back to the park after they had just had sex there. But Ryan felt less exposed if he kept his car moving.

  After he dropped Zoe off at home, Ryan sent Todd a text message, seeing if he was around to go for a quick ride. Todd was always up for a night out. So Ryan grabbed Todd and they drove around for twenty minutes, rocking out to the radio. Todd turned down the radio after Motley Crue finished Smokin’ in the Boy’s Room.

  “So what’s up? I know you didn’t pick me up to drive around Tenafly all night. Something is on your mind?” Todd glanced at Ryan. He sighed and put his right foot up on the dashboard.

  “Foot down, dude. I just had the car detailed.” Ryan shot Todd a look. His friend groaned and lowered his shoe. Ryan leaned over while he drove to make sure there wasn’t a footprint on his clean dash.

  “Sorry, man. So tell me what’s wrong.” Todd massaged his biceps.

  Ryan kept his focus out the windshield as another car pulled in front of him at the last second. Ordinarily, Ryan would tailgate the driver and flip them off but his mind was too pre-occupied to be bothered this time.

  “You gotta promise to keep this to yourself. Nobody else knows so if word gets around, I’ll know you spilled the beans.”

  Todd chuckled and shook his head. “After all these years, you don’t trust me? That’s cold, man.”

  “Dude, I trust you. But this is serious.” Ryan glanced over at the passenger for a brief moment.

  Todd held his hands up in the air. “Okay, okay. I promise I won’t say a word. Stick a needle in my eye and all that bullshit.”

  Ryan felt better when Todd agreed to remain quiet. He knew it was silly since words were cheap. As long as he felt better, it’s all that mattered to him.

  “Zoe told me Aiden tried to quit the group today.” Ryan stole a glance at Todd to gauge his reaction.

  Todd appeared stunned. “Wow. Didn’t see that one coming.” He contemplated it in silence. “Or maybe I did. Aiden is the quietest of all of us. So, I guess it shouldn’t be surprising for him to bag out.”

  “But sex? Free sex with hot ass like Jordyn and Zoe? Dude, nobody turns pussy away. Especially mint pussy like that. Right?”

  Todd seemed to consider Ryan’s words. “Yeah, true. Maybe he’s a fag.” Todd repeating what Ryan thought originally. Why wouldn’t that be every normal guy’s reaction to another guy not wanting tail?

  Ryan giggled. “I thought the same thing. Whatever the reason, he wants out and Zoe is pissed.”

  “Why? She shouldn’t give a fuck if he wants to walk away. If anything, it evens the playing field.” Ryan realized Todd was right. They had one more sausage than bun in the group. If Aiden quit, the numbers evened out.

  “Zoe said she refused his request.”

  Todd slapped his knee. “Man, she is a fucking piece of work, dude. She thinks she can lord over us all the time. It’s not her call. If Aiden wants out he should be allowed to quit. The fuck is this? The Army?” He laughed some more as he stared out the passenger window.

  Ryan agreed with Todd. But he also knew he wanted to keep getting laid. So it was better to play along with Zoe’s wishes. “She asked me to follow Aiden around in case he complains to someone or exposes our group.”

  Todd exhaled. “This is getting out of control. I thought we were just supposed to hang out and get people talking about us. Wanting to be one of us. Now, we’re drinking blood and fucking each other. And we need permission to quit?” Todd sounded angry. He wasn’t one to listen to authority and situations like this irritated him.

  “Don’t say anything. I just needed to share the news with somebody because I was a little weirded out.”

  “You’re not gonna let that skank get away with this shit, are you?” Todd stared at Ryan. Ryan peeked at Todd and then looked back to the road.

  “I’m not gonna fuck up our sexcapades, dude. You wanna give up Jordyn’s body? Zoe’s ass? Dude, you have to admit, no matter what is going on, Friday night was fucking killer.”

  Todd stared out the window. He nodded his head. “Yeah, it was fucking insane, dude.” He high-fived Ryan and they both howled and screamed at the top of their lungs. When the adrenaline surge abated, Todd started in on Ryan again.

  “Still, this is some fucked up shit, bro. We gotta watch Zoe. This power trip she is riding is way bigger than
her usual horse-shit.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “You gonna tip off Aiden?”

  Ryan almost swerved the car. “No way, dude. Zoe expects Aiden to quit Friday night. In front of all of us. She thinks he doesn’t have the balls to do it before the group.”

  Todd shook his head again. “Man, she is a scheming bitch. She’s probably right, though. Aiden is squirrelly as it is. He won’t be able to stand up to the peer pressure.”

  They both rode on in silence, thinking about Friday’s upcoming meeting. Most thoughts flashed back to the prior meeting and the sexual bliss. After years of close friendship, they both sensed what each others thoughts were. Simultaneously, they smiled at each other and started howling and high-fiving again. Todd cranked the radio higher as Poison sang Talk Dirty To Me. Ryan thought it was a fitting song as they recalled the orgy.

  Ryan felt better now that he had gotten the news off his chest. He hoped Todd would keep a lid on it. Once Friday night arrived, the whole matter would become public knowledge as Aiden either quit, or Zoe challenged him to quit before the group.

  Ryan took Todd home after they stopped to grab a soda from the convenience store. As they drove home, neither Todd nor Ryan noticed they had been followed all night. Spencer kept his car a few hundred feet back as he trailed his fellow group members. His finger dialed Zoe’s cell phone as he neared the street Todd lived on. He listened as Zoe picked up the line. Then he filled her in on the secret meeting he had just witnessed. Spencer didn’t know what they talked about, but he knew they drove around together. Aimlessly. And then went home again.

  Spencer relayed the information to Zoe.

  Chapter 46

  Aiden waited in the shadows. He watched Jordyn’s yard from behind a large sycamore tree along the sidewalk. Aiden hid himself across the street, a few houses down from Leah’s home. He had arrived an hour before the meeting was to begin so he could make sure he accounted for everyone.