Beautiful Goodbye

by Chandin Whitten

  "Jacob, stop! He doesn't love me, maybe like a sister but not like you love me," I pleaded.

  "I don't love you, you stupid whore. I bet you’re screwing him too."

  "Are you freaking insane?” I threw my hands up, pacing. “Jacob, listen to yourself. I’m with you every free second I have. You're the one who ditches me to hang out with your friends."

  Jacob grabbed my shoulders and shoved me against the wall, hitting my head off the doorframe. I fell to the floor, and I knew I had pushed him too far. I tried to get back up, but before I was able to move he kicked me in the ribs. Grabbing my side as I heard bones popping, I curled into a ball.

  Jacob stepped over me and walked out of his room. I lied on the floor helpless. I was in too much pain to move. Thankfully I had put my phone in the pocket of my jeans before coming inside. Sucking in my breath I scooted so I could see down the hall to watch for Jacob. I struggled to grab my phone and I texted Gage.

  help pls. jacobs house

  As soon as I hit send I saw Jacob looking at me from down the short hall.

  "What the fuck are you doing?!" Jacob came barreling at me, grabbing me so tight by my shoulders I thought he was going to pop my arms off.

  "Jacob please, you’re hurting me." I was fighting my tears trying to stay calm.

  Grabbing my phone Jacob opened the messages and saw I texted Gage. I could see the fury in his deep hazel eyes, the eyes that once sparkled were now filled with fire.

  Jacob threw me on his bed and started taking my jeans off. Starting to panic I begged, "Please, I can't Jacob. Please don’t do this."

  "Shut the fuck up. I'm going to fuck you and you’re going to like it." He pulled my jeans off followed by my panties.

  I closed my eyes hoping it would be over soon and Gage would be here. I should have tried fighting Jacob but he was much stronger than me and I was afraid of what he might do to me or his unborn baby that he didn't know about. So I kept my mouth shut and laid there, letting Jacob rape me.

  "Feels good huh baby? You always liked it rough, didn't you?" Jacob asked through gritted teeth. When I didn't answer he smacked my face. "I will ask you again and if you don't answer I will make it hurt. Feels good doesn't it."

  I felt the tear slipping down my cheek as I answered, "Yes."

  A few minutes, and what felt like an eternity later Jacob was finally done and climbing off me. I decided to tell Jacob about the baby and hope he would change his attitude. "Jacob I'm pregnant," I choked out.

  **********

  Larkin started to open his mouth but I held my hand up. "Just let me finish while I can, if I stop I don't know if I will be able to continue." Larkin only nodded for me to continue. I wiped a few more tears off my cheeks and took a deep breathe.

  **********

  Jacob slowly turned to face me, his face a burning red. "You’re what?"

  "I'm pregnant." As soon as I said it again I saw his face contort into something I had never seen before. It was way beyond rage, it was downright murderous. I knew then he was going to kill me.

  "You stupid fucking bitch. I bet Gage is the dad, isn't he. But, you’re trying to trap me and tell me this fucking mistake is mine. I would never want to have fucking kids with an ugly whore like you."

  Before I saw it coming Jacobs fist hit my face. I cried out in pain. He hit me over and over as I felt my blood running down my face. Jacob climbed off of me and I was hoping he had grown tired of hitting me and left. When I opened my eyes and attempted to get up I saw Jacob enter the room with a baseball bat. I was helpless, there was nothing I could do but hope and pray to God I would survive this. A sob escaped me before he grabbed me by my hair and flung me across the room hitting his dresser. Blow after blow with the bat my world started fading. I tried to curl up to protect my baby, but I was too weak. My whole body was growing numb from the assault. The last thing I remember was hearing sirens and a deep voice yelling out my name. Then my world went dark.

  I heard voices around me but couldn't see faces, everything was black. I wanted to tell these people that I wasn't dead, but I couldn't move or speak. Slowly everything faded away again.

  Next time I heard the voices I felt a warm hand on my own cold one.

  "I can't believe this has been going on for months and she never said anything."

  "I never suspected anything. All those times, all those bruises and I just shrugged it off. I thought if something was wrong she would tell me."

  "And the baby..."

  I had heard the voices before but I couldn't figure out who was there. My world went black again.

  I attempted to open my eyes but the bright room and constant beeping had my head throbbing. I felt someone grab my hand. "Honey I'm right here. Open your eyes for me."

  I slowly opened my eyes and tried to speak. My eyes felt like they were full of sand and my throat felt as if it was stuffed with cotton. I tried to speak but soon realized I couldn't. Oh my God, I couldn't talk! My eyes searched the room waiting for someone to tell me what was going on. My mom had tears streaming down her face and yelled for my dad to get the doctors.

  Gage was at my side and squeezing my hand as he said, "Hey babe. You’re going to be ok. Jacob is in jail and won't be getting out anytime soon."

  That's why I was here, it was slowly coming back now, Jacob had raped me and tried to kill me. I wanted to ask about my baby but dammit, I couldn't talk. Why the hell couldn't I talk? My throat was on fire and I felt the urge to gag.

  "Sweetheart, just relax. They have you intubated, your dad went to get your doctors and hopefully they will get the tube out." My mom was trying to calm her crying.

  My eyes filled with tears and I felt myself on the verge of a panic attack. Before I lost it Gage was wrapping his arms around me. "Shh babe it's ok. Jacob's in jail. He will never hurt you again, I promise. I'm here. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere."

  A few seconds later my dad and two doctors came into my room. "Well Ms. Reylan it’s nice to see that you’re awake. I'm Dr. Lopter and this is Dr. Faizer. We are going to remove the tube from your throat now. Is that ok with you?"

  I slowly nodded and I instantly regretted doing so. My head was killing me.

  After the tube was removed I sipped a little water before Dr. Lopter started talking and asking questions, "How are you feeling?"

  "In a lot of pain. Still kinda fuzzy I guess," I finally sputtered out.

  "That’s to be expected. We had to fight to keep you with us. Do you remember anything that happened?"

  I took a few deep breaths and swallowed a few times before finally getting out, "Yes, kind of. I remember being at my boyfriend’s house. We got into an argument and he was mad." I glanced to my parents then to Gage and back to the doctors, "He um r-raped me then he beat me. First with his hands then he went and got something. I think it was a bat."

  "You have sustained quite a few serious injuries. I am going to start explaining but if it gets to be too much just let me know, ok?"

  I nodded my head and looked to Gage pleading with my eyes that he come back beside me. Gage was instantly at my side, grabbing my hand.

  "Ok Ms. Reylan, you had some bleeding and swelling in your brain so we had to open your skull and drain the blood and reduce the swelling. We couldn't get the swelling down and you slipped into a coma. You also had a lot of internal bleeding in your abdomen. You have four broken ribs, broken nose, broken femur, and a broken collar bone. We had repaired your nose and fixed your lip that was split open. You still have a long road ahead of you but you waking from the coma is a big step. These next six months or so are going to be rough and you’re going to have a lot of pain but you should be thankful you’re alive."

  I was speechless. I felt my tears burning my eyes then escaping down my cheek. Gage used his thumbs and wiped my cheeks off and kissed my temple.

  "What about my baby?"

  That was when Dr. Faizer stepped forward. "I'm so sorry but you lost the baby. There was too much trauma for the small fe
tus to survive. Your uterus took too many direct hits. We tried everything we could but we are pretty certain you will not be able to carry a child again. "

  My parents came to stand beside me, my mom grabbing my hand and giving it a slight squeeze and asked, "Dr. Lopter when will she be able to go home?"

  "If everything goes well and there are no complications I would say in a week she should be good to go to the rehab center then if she progresses well while she's there we can schedule out-patient rehab."

  "Thank you Dr. Lopter and Dr. Faizer." My dad reached out to shake their hands. "The police want to question her, do you think we should tell them to wait or would it be ok to let them ask now?"

  "I think she should be fine to answer questions now but as I said if it gets to be too much and you’re feeling overwhelmed just ask them to stop."

  "Ok, thank you so much."

  When the doctors left the room I turned to my parent and said, "I'm so sorry. I should have never let this happen."

  My dad grabbed my hand over my mom’s and said, "This is not your fault. I wish you would have told us what was going on honey, we were just so worried. We are so happy that you’re alive."

  Gage squeezed my hand and I turned my head to face him. "Gage, I'm sorry I lied to you. I couldn't admit to myself that Jacob was dangerous. Then when I texted you last night I didn't know who else to ask."

  "Jenna, what do you think today is?" Gage asked slightly confused.

  "Um Friday? September twenty second?"

  Gage looked into my eyes and said, "No babe, it’s October tenth. You have been out for almost three weeks."

  I looked around the room, my parents, Gage's mom, and my grandparents, everyone looked so tired. "W-what?" I fumbled out.

  My grandma got up walking over beside me, rubbing my cheeks she softly said, "You were attacked on Thursday September twenty first and today is Tuesday October tenth."

  "Oh my God." I let out a small sob.

  Gage wrapped his arms around me softly rocking me. "Shh. You’re alive and you’re going to be ok. Just relax."

  I heard my dad telling my mom he was going to call the police and let them know I was awake and ready for questioning. After finally calming down my grandparents had left, telling me they would be back tomorrow to check on me. Gage's mom left not too long after also saying she would be back to see me tomorrow.

  About an hour later there was a knock on my door. My dad went to open the door revealing an older balding man who obviously enjoyed his doughnuts and a younger woman who looked rather intimidating. "Hello Ms. Reylan." The woman said, "I'm Detective Moore and this is my partner Detective Alberson. We wanted to ask you a few questions regarding Jacob Vincen."

  "Ok."

  Detective Moore looked around the room before landing her eyes on mine. "Do you mind if we do this in private?"

  "I guess not."

  "If you would excuse us we should only be a few minutes. If you could just wait in the hall for me." My parents and Gage gave me a hug before exiting my room.

  Detective Moore pulled out a notebook and pen before taking a seat next to me. Detective Alberson pulled out a voice recorder and sat it on the small table beside my bed then took a seat next to Detective Moore, "Ok Ms. Reylan, what was your relationship with Mr. Vincen?"

  "He was my boyfriend."

  "How long had you two been together?"

  "About six months."

  "And of those six months how many were you sexually active?"

  "Five."

  "Consensual?" Detective Moore looked at me over her glasses.

  "Most of the time."

  "Most of the time?"

  "Yes. There were times when we would fight and he would force me."

  "What about the baby? Was it his?"

  "Of course!"

  "Ms. Reylan I'm not trying to upset you but Mr. Vincen is not being very cooperative so I am relying on you to fill in the blanks."

  "We got into a fight, he raped me, he beat me, he killed our baby. What other blanks do you need filled in?"

  Detective Alberson cut in, "Jenna we are here to help. We want to put Mr. Vincen behind bars until he rots but when we got to the scene he wasn't there and he has built a story saying someone broke in and attacked you. So we have to build a case and evidence against him. This should be an easy open and shut case but we need your help."

  "I'm sorry. I am still in shock and scared that he will somehow escape and find me, killing me this time."

  Detective Moore shook her head and stated, "That will never happen. He will be locked up until court. But you will have to face him when court comes around. He has an ex-girlfriend who had agreed to testify against him but he also has a long line of girls who are willing to testify for him."

  "I'm not afraid of facing him, I'm just afraid of him finishing what he started."

  After a half hour of questioning the two detectives said they were happy with all the information I gave them and they would be in touch. As soon as they were out of my room my parents and Gage were back inside and at my side.

  My mom rubbed Gage's back and said, "Sweetie why don't you go home. You need some rest."

  "I'm ok. I can't leave Jenna right now, not like this."

  "Gage you haven't left since she arrived. Why don't you go home and take a nice hot shower and sleep in your bed. You can come back in the morning. Kevin is leaving in a few minutes to get the kids from Mrs. Huckle. You can ride with him."

  Gage looked down at me and I smiled. "It's ok. I shall live to see another day. Go home and get a nice steamy shower for the both of us and sleep in your comfy bed. I will see you tomorrow. And I expect a present."

  "You got it, babe. I love you." Gage kissed my forehead before turning to my mom and hugging her.

  "Thanks for everything Gage, I don't know what I would do without you. Love you."

  My dad came over to hug me before he left and said, "Love you JP."

  "Love you too dad." I watched my dad and best friend leave before turning to look at my mom. Her eyes were filled with tears. "Mom, you ok?"

  "Oh I'm just a silly mom. I am just so sorry you had to go through this."

  "Mom I'm fine, just a few bumps and bruises." I averted my eyes so my mom wouldn't see my tears. Being told I could never have kids killed me.

  "You call almost dying and being told you can never carry a child bumps and bruises? This is more than just bumps and bruises. You scared the hell out of me, out of everybody. And why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? Jenna Penelope you used to tell me everything."

  "I had just found out. I went to Jacob's apartment to tell him and he didn't take the news well."

  "Well you will never have to worry about him again. If it was up to me I would have killed him myself but the cops got to him before I did. But I don't think anyone was as upset as Gage. That boy loves you."

  "I'm glad you didn't kill him. You don't need murder charges mom. I love Gage too, he's my best friend."

  "I wish ya'll would open your eyes and realize you two would be perfect together." My mom shook her head.

  "Oh no mom, we are too close. I think of him as not just my best friend but my brother."

  "I know honey, but I want you to end up with someone like him who adores you like he does."

  "Trust me mom we have our problems, we are not perfect. We fight like brother and sister and we know way too much about each other. I can't see ever being with him like that. I know you want me to be happy and have the perfect guy but Gage isn't my prince charming mom. He's like my evil step brother."

  "I love you Jenna and I want whatever makes you happy and if that’s not Gage well then, I guess I will have to accept that. Even though I think ya'll should give it a shot. You never know, maybe you would fall head over heels in love, get married, and give me a few grandba..." My mom closed her eyes and hung her head, realizing what she had just said.

  "Mom, its ok. You never know what the future holds. Maybe I can't have kids or maybe on
e day a miracle will happen and I will be able to have a baby. But for now I can't worry about that. I know my dream was to always grow up, become some bigwig ad executive, get married, and have lots of kids. Maybe this was God's screwed up way of saying not all dreams come true." I had to close my eyes tight to fight the tears building.

  "Honey, maybe someday you will have kids but always remember you are amazing and special. No matter what your future holds I will love you like crazy." My mom hugged me, kissing my cheek.

  "Love you too mom. My head is killing me, can you ask the nurse if I can have more pain meds?"

  "Of course, I'll be right back." My mom turned and walked out.

  A few minutes later my mom returned with a nurse trailing behind her. "Hello Ms. Reylan. I'm Vicky, I will be your nurse tonight. Your mom said you were in some pain so I brought some meds to hopefully help."

  She handed me a tiny cup that was holding four pills then put a syringe into my IV and instantly I felt fuzzy. I took the pills without an issue and before my nurse left the room my eyes were drifting shut. I could barely make out my mom when she told me she was going to get something to eat and she would be back a little later.

  The next few days seem to tick by so slow. I was sure I would never get out of the hospital. I had started physical therapy and was in constant pain, but I was determined to get the hell out of the hospital. After a little over a week after waking from my coma, I was released to go to the rehab center. I was there for another five weeks, but thankfully it was more like an apartment than a hospital. Gage basically moved in with me and was my rock. The day I was released to go home I had never been so happy. I was never so thankful to be at home and in my bed. I still had a long road ahead of me but being out of the hospital and rehab center gave me the push I needed to get through these next few months and get back to my old self.

  After being home a few days I got a call from my lawyer letting me know when the trial would be. I had three weeks until I had to face Jacob and that moment couldn't come soon enough. I wanted to show him I was stronger than he was and that he didn't scare me. I had to prove to myself that I could overcome everything he had put me through.