Riptide (A Renegades Novel)

by Skye Jordan

  An uncomfortable tingle traveled along her shoulders.

  Zach sighed. “I am, but something tells me this isn’t going to go bad.”

  “I hope you’re right—for you, Sophia, and Tessa.”

  Tessa didn’t like the fact that this woman already knew her name.

  Zach promised to call her soon, disconnected, and leaned his forearms on the railing, staring out at the ocean. The soothing sound of the surf drifted into the silence, but it wasn’t doing anything for Tessa. She felt shaky now. So many emotions tumbled through her, she wasn’t even sure what she was feeling or why. But she was suddenly terrified of having the conversation she’d come to have. She looked over her shoulder at the door. If she left as quietly as she’d come in—

  “Tessa?”

  His voice made her flinch. Too late.

  She returned her gaze to the deck and found him in the doorway, leaning into the door jamb.

  “I, uh…sorry, I…” Where was the woman who could speak to Congress without a hitch? She tried again. “I knocked, but you…” Her mind fragmented—to losing Sophia, to walking away from Zach, to getting this damn bill turned into law, to going home and facing Corinne’s absence again…

  She had the wild urge to run. To grab Sophia and move to Switzerland or Norway or some other location in the Netherlands where people were supposedly the happiest people on earth.

  “Who was that?” she asked. “On the phone.”

  “Oh.” He looked at his phone, then slid it into the pocket of his board shorts. “My, um, my sister. The youngest.”

  The psychologist. That explained her words and formality.

  She blew out a breath, trying to calm her nerves, but it wasn’t working. “I came to talk about Sophia, but…I don’t think this is a good time…”

  “Hey.” He came toward her, his voice soft and concerned. “What’s wrong?”

  A better question would be ‘What wasn’t wrong?’

  “Everything,” she said, dropping her hand and sniffling back the sudden sting of tears. “Nothing.” She choked back more emotion. The urgent need to find a dark corner where she could break and no one would see overwhelmed her. She turned toward the door. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”

  “Hold on.” His warm hand closed on her forearm, then his other slipped around her waist from behind. “Hold on.”

  Tessa squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed them hard, willing the tears to dry up, but the emotions inside her wouldn’t stop spiraling, and a sob escaped.

  He turned her to face him and enveloped her in his arms all at the same time, pulling her to her toes and stealing her breath. She was trapped in his big, strong arms, holding her like she mattered, like she meant something to him—something more than a meaningless hookup. More than the woman he had to deal with to see his daughter. More than a pseudo-mom, a nursemaid, an employee.

  Her mind couldn’t wait for a private place to snap. She’d endured too much for too long. Hearing Zach’s honest opinion of her overloaded her already overtaxed emotional system. Tears leaked from her eyes and slid over his bare skin.

  “Sh-shit…” she stuttered through the emotion choking her. “I’m s-sorry. I just…” She took another breath, but couldn’t find control. “It’s all so much s-sometimes…”

  “Shh, it’s okay.” He stroked her hair and kissed her head. “Let go. I’m here.”

  That made her cry harder—in fear, in hope, in gratitude. God, she was so fucked-up. She buried her face against his chest. She had to stop. He was going to think she was a lunatic. That she was unstable and couldn’t take care of Sophia.

  “Tessa,” he crooned, his voice so soft, so understanding. “The harder you hold on to it, the scarier it seems. You’re safe here. Let it go.”

  Her body didn’t give her a choice. The tears flooded over her lashes, the sobs choked her, and she trembled.

  Zach slid his arms lower and picked her up. Carrying her to the couch, he sank into the cushions, where he pushed her thighs apart so she straddled his lap. He tilted his head and pressed kisses to her cheeks, then rubbed away the tears. He combed his hands through her hair and murmured such sweet things. “I’m here. I’m not going to steal Sophia. You’re an amazing mother. We’re going to work this out. I’m scared too, but we can do this. I believe in us.”

  His words were so sweet, they hurt. And it felt like forever before her body relaxed against his. Until her sobs quieted to hiccups. Until she could breathe properly.

  He cupped her face and pushed her back to look at her. So much emotion brewed in his eyes—passion, intensity, confusion. Then he leaned in while pulling her toward him and kissed her hard. A murmur of surprise ebbed from her throat. His tongue swept into her mouth, found hers, and devastated her with an erotic kiss she felt all the way to the bone. Dizzy, she leaned back to tell Zach they shouldn’t make things any more complicated. But he pulled her tee off over her head, stroked those big, warm hands down her back, and Tessa’s resistance caved.

  Everything happened so fast. He found the clasp on her bra in seconds and stripped it from her body. His hands pressed against her spine, arching her back. Then his mouth covered her breast and made her head drop back on a cry of pleasure. He hummed in approval, shooting more sensation through her chest and straight between her legs.

  So wild. So passionate. So raw. Like he’d been waiting since their first night for this. Like he couldn’t wait another second. A swift, powerful streak of emotional and physical lust slammed through her and cleared her mind of everything but Zach. Tessa had never been wanted this way. Sex had never been this hot, this urgent. She’d never needed anyone the way she needed him now. On so many levels.

  A warning flag fluttered somewhere in the back of her mind. This was dangerous—to her heart. Her soul. So dangerous. Her logical brain fought to be heard, but Zach sat forward and laid her on the coffee table. The snap of cold against her skin almost pulled her back to reality, but Zach followed her down and kissed her, ending all rational thought. He braced his hands on the table above her head and kissed her. And kissed her. And kissed her.

  Within seconds, she was ravenous. She stroked her hands down his body, into the waistband of his shorts, and tugged at the Velcro holding the front together. Tessa took his cock in her hand and sighed at the same time Zach groaned. His tongue dove deep into her mouth, and he groaned again, the sound so dark and needy, it shivered through her.

  “Want you,” he murmured into her mouth between kisses. “Need you.”

  His mouth and hands stroked and teased her breasts. His lips burned a path over her belly while his fingers unfastened her shorts and pushed them off. Zach dropped to his knees, swung her thighs over his shoulders, and opened his mouth over her sex.

  “God.” Light flashed in her head. Sensation cut a path through her body. “Zach…oh, God…Zach.” She didn’t know what her body was doing. It was out of control. So out of control. Pleasure streaked up her spine, arching her off the table and lighting fireworks off behind her eyelids. Sounds choked out of her throat. Sounds of passion, need, pleasure so extreme, it wiped out all thought. She was on the edge of orgasm so fast, she sank one hand into his hair, clenched her teeth, and lifted to look down at him.

  He had her thighs over his bare shoulders, his arms locked around them, holding them wide, and his mouth moved over her with a hunger she’d never imagined, his face filled with a dark lusty need like a starving animal feasting on a delicacy.

  The sight, so erotic, pushed her over the edge. She gripped the table edge and screamed as the first shock speared right through her body. The pleasure just kept coming, shard after shard after shard of pleasure so intense, she bucked and twisted. By the time he lifted his mouth off her and bit her inner thigh, all Tessa could do was gasp.

  He stepped out of his shorts, gripped her thighs, and hauled her to the edge of the table.

  “Oh my God.” Her mind wouldn’t work. Her body was lifeless. She scraped a hand through her hair
and let her arm drop over her face. “Jesus.”

  The soft sound of a foil packet crinkled in the air a moment before Zach hooked his thick bicep under one thigh and opened her. Then his cock was pushing into her. She gasped and moaned, clutching his free arm where it was braced on the table. Zach’s head was down, his gaze watching his penetration, over and over and over, a little deeper each time. So hot. So fucking hot. His moves were so fluid and confident. His body beautiful and powerful. And when he thrust fully inside her, stretching her until her breath caught and her body strained, only then did he let go of restraint.

  With his hands braced on the table, her thighs still over his shoulder, he leaned in, stretching her, opening her, pushing so deep, she felt him everywhere. In the burn of her pussy, the pressure in her pelvis, the tightness of her throat. “God, Zach… God.”

  “Mine,” he murmured, pulling out, then smoothly thrusting home. “Mine.” He thrust again, a full tip-to-balls thrust that moved her whole body, inside and out.

  She opened her mouth to cry out, but her throat trapped the sound. Her nails dug into his arm for the next drive. And the next. Each a perfectly smooth, perfectly deep, perfectly powerful stroke of ecstasy. One after another after another. No break, no pause. Steady, hard perfection. Taking her higher and higher and higher. His eyes burned into hers. Watching her reactions, feeding off her pleasure. A pleasure he controlled. Slowly. Deeply. Passionately.

  “P-please,” she choked out.

  But Zach held on to the rhythm of perfection. “Uh-uh,” he murmured, his gaze sharp and demanding. “I’m gonna keep you here. Right here. Under me. Wanting me. Begging me.”

  “Zach,” she panted, lifting her hips, seeking release.

  “Right here, right now, you’re mine. All mine,” he said again, his teeth gritted, his thrusts strong and purposeful. “Let go, Tess. Let go of all that control you hold on to. Give yourself to me.”

  Tessa dropped her head back just as his thrust hit home. She arched and cried out, but he withdrew too soon, leaving her on the edge of climax.

  “So good,” he ground out. “So fucking good.” He lowered his head and licked into her mouth, then whispered, “Let go, Tessa. Give me everything.”

  Sweat slid over his forehead and down his temple. He put extra power behind the next thrust, and she almost climaxed. She could taste the release on her tongue, just before it slid away and out of reach again. The stress of unfulfilled climax plunged her into disappointment, and when the next thrust came, she didn’t have the energy to reach for it again.

  “Oh, yeah.” Zach’s voice dipped into the depths of dark, gritty pleasure. “There it is.” And he thrust again. “That’s it. Right there, baby.” His thrusts came hard and fast, but no less fluid. Hammer after hammer after hammer of smooth, deep penetration. He dropped to his elbows. One hand slid into her hair and fisted. His gaze locked onto hers. “Mine. Feel it, Tessa.”

  “Yes.” The word came out of nowhere but felt perfectly right.

  “That’s it…” Glide, hammer. “Let go, Tessa,” Glide, hammer. “I’ve got you.” Glide, hammer. “Give it, Tess. Give it to me.”

  As if he had more control over her body than she did, Tessa rose to his words and broke to his will. The orgasm slammed through her body like an earthquake. Ripple after ripple after ripple of pleasure twisted and tortured her into euphoric ecstasy. Tessa cried out, dug her hands into Zach, into the table and hung on as Zach’s own release pummeled him with hard jerks of his powerful body while dark sounds of ecstasy vibrated in his throat.

  Zach fell to his forearms on the table and dropped his forehead to her chest. His hot breath cascaded over her sweaty body. Tessa tried to form a thought, but her brain wouldn’t pull together. She was obliterated and still shaking.

  Zach stayed there a long time. As their breathing quieted, the sound of the ocean waves drifted in. The room’s silence seemed loud in the wake of the blood rushing in her ears. And as soon as her mind started to work again, Tessa wished she could turn it off, because all the worries pushed in and tried to steal the raw pleasure lingering.

  Finally, Zach pushed up on his hands and looked down at her. She couldn’t read the expression, a little wary, a little joyous, a little confused. “That…” His gaze went distant a moment, puzzled, before he shook his head, “was one for the record books.”

  Tessa was too wrung out to even laugh. She managed a shaky smile and met his slow, sweet kiss before he pulled from her body and straightened on wobbly legs. He held out his hands to help her up. All she had the strength to do was take them. Zach moved her to the sofa, leaned in for another kiss, and whispered, “Cleanup. Be right back.”

  Zach stood at the sink in the bathroom, looking at his reflection in the mirror. His hair was all over the place, his lips were swollen and red, his face was flushed, and scratch marks curved one biceps.

  That had been way more than one for the record books. That had been…

  He didn’t know how to classify it. Zach had been with plenty of women. He’d had great sex. But this…this was different. It wasn’t about the sex—though that was fan-freaking-tastic. It was something else. Something more. Or maybe his head was messed up because of Sophia and the custody issue and Tessa’s role in Sophia’s life. He’d never felt an overwhelming need to own someone. He’d never thought of a woman as his. Not even the few women who’d been special enough to call girlfriends.

  Had to be Sophia. Or maybe it was Tessa’s situation.

  “God…” He didn’t know.

  Zach splashed water on his face and watched it drip off in the sink. Damn, he wanted her. He wanted her and Sophia with him.

  His whole fucking life had taken a one-eighty.

  And it scared the living shit out of him.

  Zach exhaled, dried his face, and returned to the living room. Tessa was curled on her side, using her arm as a pillow. Her eyes were open, but barely. He sat on the edge of a cushion beside her and brushed her hair back from her face. A sleepy smile turned her lips.

  “You look so good naked on my couch.”

  She laughed, a sweet, bubbly sound that made him smile. “You look better sitting naked next to me.”

  He leaned down and kissed her. Her lips were soft and sweet, and when she kissed him back, that whole world-shifting-on-its-axis thing happened again.

  Zach rolled her to her back and lay directly on top of her, making her laugh. Then he slid down the sofa until his chest was wedged between her thighs and his cheek lay against her belly. The scent of their sex mixed with her perfume and lightened his head. Tessa combed her hands into his hair and scraped her fingernails gently along his scalp.

  Zach groaned. “That feels amazing.”

  “Your daughter loves it too. Never fails to calm her down when she’s upset.”

  “Hmm.” That was the perfect segue. He just wasn’t exactly sure for what. And he wasn’t overly eager to create tension between them again.

  She pulled in a deep breath that stuttered a little, then sighed. “I’m sorry about my meltdown,” she said, her voice soft and embarrassed. “I don’t know where that came from.”

  “Tessa.” He turned his head and rested his chin on her belly, meeting her gaze. “Your best friend died a few months ago, you have no family, you’re raising a baby on your own, all while trying to not only maintain a demanding career, but excel in it.” He reached up and stroked her cheek. “If you didn’t melt down once in a while, I’d think you were made of stone. And if you were made of stone, I wouldn’t want you raising our daughter.”

  Our daughter.

  The words had just come out. He hadn’t thought them before they’d spilled off his tongue, he’d just spoken from the heart—where, he realized, both Tessa and Sophia resided. By the look on her face—a little stunned, a little melancholy—they’d hit her as odd but sweet too. A part of him told him it wasn’t real. That he was simply reacting to the shock of learning about Sophia and latching on to the only buoy close eno
ugh to keep him afloat. That it had all happened too fast.

  He tried to tell himself he’d meant the words in a different way—that Sophia was their daughter separately. But the resounding rightness of the alternative meaning—that Sophia was their daughter together, as a family—continued to vibrate inside him.

  He stroked his hand down her chest, over her breast, around her ribs and back to her hip. “Do you have any friends back in DC? People to talk to?”

  She hesitated. “I work with some great people, and Abby—”

  “Abby’s not a friend.” He softened his voice to take the edge off his words. “Abby’s a good person, but honey, she’s not a friend. I know she loves Sophia, and I know she’s worried, but she’s also young, immature, and judgmental. Friends don’t judge you. Friends support you. And the people you work with can only be friends if you see them outside of work.”

  Her gaze lifted to her hands, where they continued to move through his hair.

  “I’m talking about the kind of people who stand by you when the tough stuff hits,” he said. “The kind of people you can tell anything and you know they won’t think less of you.”

  “Then…no. I mean, I used to. I used to, you know, have friends and date. I…” She exhaled, her expression sinking with an edge of despair that hurt Zach to see. “Corinne was my only real friend,” she said softly. “We were opposites in so many ways, but we loved each other in spite of our differences. We loved each other’s unique personalities, you know? There is something really special about that kind of relationship, where you’re so completely different, but are still the best of friends. It’s so…I don’t know, so real. You’re not friends because you shared a hobby or profession or something equally coincidental or superficial. She always understood me even if she didn’t agree with me. And she was always there when I needed someone.”

  She shook her head and laughed a little. “I was the quiet rule follower. The mediator. I play everything safe, do what’s expected, do what I’m told, never make trouble. I’m the person people go to when they’re in trouble or need something, not when they want to have fun. Corinne was the free spirit. She loved everyone; everyone loved her. She partied hard and would work any job to make ends meet. She swore, ran with a rough crowd, broke the law.”