The Decision

by Patricia Roberts

  “Don’t you have anything to say at all?” Samantha asked him. “You’re going to be lucky if Shelby ever talks to you again.”

  “What have I done” he said looking at the photo. “I have to go find her” he told them running out the door. Samantha watched him shaking her head and began to go. “Samantha it’s not what you think it is.”

  “You want to know what I think Sara?” I think that you have had every intention of coming between them since the moment you arrived. Shelby is one of the kindest and sweetest women you will ever meet and I will not let you fill my head with lies when I know what you were doing” she told her and left.

  Sara bent her head and had tears coming out of her eyes. No one had ever said such hurtful words to her before and she hated feeling like this. She was only trying to be a good friend to Stephen, and she had never meant to hurt Shelby in the process. Shelby left the restaurant and started to drive. She didn’t know where she was going but she felt like she needed to get away. She ended up going to her mother’s grave. She sat down on the grass and wiped some dirt off the grave.

  “Hey momma” she said with tears in her eyes. “I really miss you a lot. Especially here lately I found out I am going to have a baby and I wish you were here with me. I am so scared about everything. From things that happen in the pregnancy to having a child. I want to be a good mom and I know Stephen would make a good dad but I don’t even know where our marriage is going at this point. I know that we have both made mistakes but what if he doesn’t love me anymore. I feel so lost sometimes without you. I feel like you were such a big deal in my life and I lost you way to young. I miss you every day and I wish I could hear you say things would be okay.”

  “They will you know” she heard behind her. She turned to see her dad standing there with some flowers. “Hey daddy” she told him. “Hey sweetheart are you okay? I didn’t mean to hear you.”

  “It’s alright I just miss her a lot” she told him. “I know the feeling” he said to her.

  Shelby looked at her dad and felt horrible for him. He had only loved one woman his whole life and she had been taken from him to soon. She didn’t know how he made it every day without her. Shelby was barely making it without Stephen and it had only been two weeks. Seeing him at the pizza joint she didn’t even know if they still had a chance of staying together. What if he had moved on from her and she was alone. He laid the flowers down and pulled out some weeds that had grown. John came over to sit next to her and she leaned her head on his shoulder.

  “Do you ever think of dating dad?” she asked him. “What a question!” he told her laughing. “What is so funny about it? I highly doubt that mom would want you to be miserable for the rest of your life.”

  “I don’t know I mean it’s been five years so I guess I have thought of it but at the same time it would feel weird. I haven’t dated anyone since I was in high school.” That made Shelby laugh and somehow she knew that things were going to work out for them. She just had to have faith that it would happen.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  Shelby arrived home to see Stephen’s vehicle in the driveway. She sighed and leaned her head back. “I don’t know if I can deal with this” she whispered. She made it inside to see Stephen sitting on the couch with his face in his hands. “Stephen?” she asked him. “Shelby you’re here” he said coming near her. She didn’t know why but she moved back. “Shelby about lunch” he began. “The last time you were here I gave you the opportunity to talk so now I need you to give me mine.” “Alright” he told her.

  “I have been completely by myself for the last two weeks. I have missed you every day and prayed that you would come home. I know you needed some space but I needed you here with me. I am terrified thinking of doing this by myself and I needed my husband. So imagine my shock when I find another woman kissing your cheek. If that is what you really want I won’t stop you, but that is not the man I married” she told him with tears in her eyes.

  “All I know right now is that I am not supposed to be stressed out and if you have come over here to blame me again or fight with me I just don’t have the energy left in me to fight with you” she said sitting down. “Can I speak now?” he asked cautiously. “Yes” she told him.

  “I have been an idiot and I am so sorry. I know that doesn’t make it better and I wish that there was some way that I could. I think I became so scared at the thought of becoming a father and I needed someone to blame. It doesn’t make it right what happened but I am so very sorry. As for the woman you seen me with at lunch she was just a friend. The day I moved out Sara Bishop came over to the shop. She was best friends with Lily and wanted to catch up. She is actually the new Vice Principal at your school. She is the only person who wasn’t mad at me for leaving you and she let me talk about how I was feeling without judging me. She heard my side but also made me realize that I was wrong in leaving you. She has had a crush on your dad for years and I was teasing her about it. She was giving me a kiss on the cheek because I told her I was going to talk to you today. When Samantha came over to the table she laid this on the table he told her holding the ultrasound picture. As soon as I looked at the picture I knew what a fool I was. I looked all over town for you and couldn’t find you so I came over here he told her. I know that I have been wrong and it’s asking a lot but I really want to be involved now.”

  “All because a girl you knew in high school told you too? Shelby asked hurt. “No of course not. I was already coming to see you but when I looked at this picture I knew I had been wrong. You have a little life growing inside of you that we created. I want to be here every step of the way” he told her. Shelby sighed and looked at him.

  “I do forgive you for what you did. I have been just as scared as you have been but that doesn’t mean things can go like they were. You can’t just get angry at me and leave. I didn’t know if we were going to remain married or go our separate ways. I want to be able to forgive you completely but it’s going to take some time. It won’t happen overnight” she told him. “I completely understand” he told her. “For right now I think that it would be best if you slept in the guest room. I am not very hungry so I am going to bed. Goodnight Stephen” she told him and left the room.

  Stephen watched her go and his heart ached. He knew that he had made this happen but he didn’t realize how hurt she had been by his actions. Over the next few weeks Stephen tried to do things to help Shelby out. He made her breakfast and lunch every day and made sure she had enough gas in her car. He cleaned the house and cooked most of the meals. Shelby knew that he was trying and she was grateful he was back home but she was still hurt over what had happened with him. That Friday Shelby was eating lunch in her room at school when there was a knock on the door.

  “Come in” she called out. Sara walked in to the room and smiled. “Hello I don’t think we have been formerly introduced. My name is Sara Bishop” she told her. “I am Shelby Matthews but I guess you already knew that.”

  “I was hoping that we could talk” Sara told her. “Sure” Shelby said motioning towards a chair. “I know that you saw me kiss your husband on the cheek and I wanted to make sure you knew it was harmless.” Shelby sighed and looked at her. “I think I knew at the time it was harmless. There was always a part of me that knew that he still loved me the whole time he was gone but it hurt to see him period that day. I feel like I have been on a roller coaster for the past few weeks” Shelby told her.

  “I know and I am sorry that you had to go through it alone” she told her. “Thanks and I know that talking to Stephen he told me you were always telling him to come and talk to me and I do appreciate that.”

  “I had no doubt in my mind that he loved you” Sara told her as Shelby looked down. “Did I say something wrong?” Sara asked her.

  “No I just haven’t been very fair to him lately. When he first left me I kept on expecting him to come home and then he didn’t. I think by the time that he came home that I was so angry at him for leaving me that
I wanted him to see what it felt like. He has been so kind to me. He fixes me breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I come home to see the house is cleaned, and he even puts gas in my car because he knows that I hate to do that.” Sara smiled at her as she spoke. “Well that doesn’t seem so bad to me.”

  “I know but I think I am just terrified that he is going to leave again that I have been cold towards him and not opening my heart.”

  “I have known Stephen since I was in high school. One thing I do know is that when he loves he does so with his whole heart. I know it can be scary especially after what you two have been through but open your heart back up to him. I may have spent a lot of time with him when he was gone but all that he talked about was his life with you. I just want you both to be happy and felt that I needed to come and talk with you today.”

  “Thanks for coming to talk to me today” Shelby told her. “Of course I wanted to meet the woman that had captured his heart. I remember coming back for Lily’s funeral and seeing how broken he looked. No one thought that he would ever find love again and I am glad that he did” Sara told her and left the room. When Shelby got home she seen that Stephen had left some chili in a crockpot with a note beside it.

  Shelby, I have to work a little later tonight to get a vehicle ready to be picked up. If you need anything call me and I will come home. I love you, Stephen. Shelby held it with tears in her eyes. She ate dinner and took a bath afterwards. It was then that she decided that it was time to have her husband back. A few hours later she heard Stephen close the door and a few minutes later she heard the shower running. She knew it was time and went to his room. Stephen was so exhausted. It had been a long day and he just wanted to go to sleep. He wished it was upstairs with his wife but he would do anything to make her happy. He was doing everything that he could to make it up to her. He just hoped it was enough to win her back. He heard a knock on the door and he got up. He opened it to see the beautiful face of his wife.

  “Hey” he said smiling. “Hey have you ate?” she asked him. “I grabbed something earlier but we can talk if you want.”

  “No I want to go to bed” she told him. “Oh alright” he said looking down. Shelby took a deep breath and reached for his hand. He looked up surprised. “I want you to make love to me tonight in our bed” she told him.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  “Really?” he asked shocked. “Yes” she told him smiling. Stephen pulled her to him and kissed her with all of the passion he had. He had waited weeks to hold her and love her again. Stephen smiled and picked her up and took her upstairs. He spent the night making love to her and cherishing her body. Shelby had never loved him as much as she did at that moment.

  “I love you” Stephen told her. “I love you two” Shelby said and curled up asleep in his arms. Stephen stroked her back and thanked God that he gave them another chance. He promised he would take care of her and this child inside of her for the rest of his life. The next morning Shelby woke up with a smile on her face. She was wrapped in Stephen’s arms and didn’t want to move. She looked up to see him smiling at her.

  “Good morning” she told him. “Good morning” he said kissing down her neck. Shelby giggled and he closed his eyes sighing. He had missed her so much and was so glad things were going back to normal. Over the next few weeks they felt like newlyweds again. Last week they had celebrated their anniversary by going to the new pizza joint in town and eating and laughing. Today was Shelby’s appointment at the doctor and she had told Stephen about it a few days ago but she didn’t know if he remembered. She didn’t want to go again but she was nervous about asking them. Even though they were doing great together her pregnancy was still a touchy subject. She wanted to share so many things with him that she was feeling but she was afraid that if she did he would end up leaving again and that thought scared her. She came downstairs to see Stephen dressed for work.

  “Hey” she told him. “Hey baby, how did you sleep?”

  “Pretty good” she told him. “Listen I made you some breakfast and it’s in the microwave. I have to go in early today so I can meet you at the Doctor.”

  “You’re going?” she asked shocked. “Of course I am. I know I let you down before but I am trying to do the best I possibly can.” Shelby ran over to him and hopped into his arms. “I love you so much” she told him. “I love you two and everything is going to be alright” he told her kissing her forehead. Later that morning Stephen met Shelby at the doctor’s office. They walked in took her weight and told her the Doctor would be in soon. A few minutes later a doctor walked in.

  “Hello my name is Doctor Rivers” he said holding out his hand. “My name is Shelby and this is my husband Stephen.”

  “It’s nice to meet you guys. So according to your paperwork you’re here because your four months pregnant. It says here that you have had heart problems in the past.”

  “Yes I had a heart murmur that they had to do surgery for about nine months ago.”

  “How have you been feeling since then?” the Doctor asked. “I get tired easily and still have nausea but other than that I seem to be doing alright.”

  “Okay let’s take a look at you.” He got his stethoscope out and checked her heart. “Alright why don’t you lay back and we can listen to the baby’s heartrate.” She laid down and lifted her shirt while Stephen grabbed her hand. The doctor checked the heartrate and all of a sudden they heard it. “Wow that is loud” Stephen said smiling. “It sure is and it sounds real good” the Doctor said. He helped Shelby sit back up and had a seat.

  “Your pregnancy is going to be considered high risk because of your heart. Anytime you have a heart problem and you mix having a child with that it causes a problem. For right now it is best to just take it easy. I know it says here you’re a teacher.”

  “Yes” Shelby told him. “I think it would be best for you to stop working at the beginning of the year. It is just going to get harder on you and the longer you are pregnant the more we will be worried about your health and your child’s.”

  “I understand” Shelby told him. She loved teaching but she wanted to do whatever was necessary for their child to be alright. “Is there any other questions?” he asked them. “What about the baby?” Shelby asked. “What do you mean?” the doctor asked. “Is there a chance the baby could have a heart problem to?”

  “There are times it can happen but we check for that as soon as the baby is born and most time heart murmurs are not that bad. If you would have known about yours sooner it would not have got as bad as it did.”

  “Thank you” Stephen said with a sigh of relief. It had been bothering him to and he was glad to hear it wouldn’t be fatal if they had a baby. “If there are no other questions you will come in next month and we will do an ultrasound.”

  “Will we be able to know the sex of the baby?”

  “Yes we should be able to tell you by then” he told Shelby as she smiled at Stephen. They left and he took her out for lunch before he went back to work. “How did the appointment go?” Ryan asked when he returned. “It was alright they are a little worried about her because of her heart and she will have to quit teaching after next month.”

  “Does it make you feel anxious?” Ryan asked concerned. “Yeah it does but I have to put faith in God that he will not let anything hurt her or our baby. I don’t know how I would feel if I lost another child” Stephen said looking down. “I just have to trust in God and the Doctor that things will remain alright with both of them.”

  “I will pray with you man.” After school got out Sara took her vehicle over to the garage. She had a low tire and wanted them to check it for her. “Hey” she said to Samantha when she walked in. Samantha looked up and looked guilty. She had talked to Shelby about what she had said to her and she had felt guilty. “Hey I have been meaning to talk to you.”

  “Really?” Sara asked her. “I shouldn’t have been so rude to you the other day” she told her. “I understand why you were. If I had a brother that was going thr
ough what Stephen was I would be concerned to.”

  Shelby told me that she talked to you and that things were okay between you guys.”

  “Yes she has become a really good friend to me. She came in this afternoon to let me and the principal know that she wouldn’t be able to work after the first of the year. We will miss her but understand why she has to take off.”

  “Yeah I am really worried about her but more so about Stephen. He lost Lily and Timothy and if the same thing happened with Shelby I don’t know that he could go through that again.”

  “I know what you mean” she told her. Sara went in a few minutes later to check on her vehicle. “Well what is the diagnosis?” she asked Stephen. “It looks like you had a nail in your tire. I don’t have your fancy brand tire so it won’t be ready until tomorrow” he said shaking his head. “Oh no how am I going to get home?” she asked him. “I could give you a ride if you’re ready. I want to get home it’s been a long day.” “I saw Shelby this afternoon at school. She told us about having to leave at the end of the year.”

  “Yeah I know she is sad about it but I think it’s for the best” Stephen told her. They walked over to his truck and he held the door open for her. “Thanks again for this” she said touching his arm. “No problem let’s roll” he said laughing. She laughed with him and got in.

  They didn’t notice John standing there watching them. He had heard about what had happened a few weeks ago with them. He glared at the truck as it left the parking lot. He would not let Stephen hurt his daughter again. It was time that they both had a talk. He hadn’t spoken to him since he heard that he had left his daughter and had seen Sara at the garage. There was something about her that got under his skin and he didn’t like it. He knew that they were coming over for Cody’s birthday party a few days later and he was going to find out what exactly was going on with him. He just prayed he wasn’t trying to hurt his daughter again or all bets were off. Their friendship would be over.