Turns Out I Do Know The Muffin Man (A Dear Mary Mystery)

by Stacy Matthews

  We both thought this was a little strange even for Tweddle; maybe he was just in need of some of his “medicine.” We walked down closer to the boat ramp and inflated the boat. We got in and started to paddle our way out to the island. It was much bigger and longer than it looked from land. This pop-up had to be at least a mile long. Thank goodness we hadn’t had any rain in awhile. I could tell it was hard enough for Charlie to be rowing, if it had rained the current would have been too strong and they would have canceled the boat rides. So he cranked up the little motor that he had decided to put on the boat.

  That river really is dangerous. As we got closer to the island Charlie said, “Something’s not right. I feel like we are being watched.” He was right; it was an eerie feeling, I could feel two eyes on me but, I couldn’t see where they were. Charlie decided we would motor around to the other side of the island to see if we could see any signs of life. It was only then we realized how big this island actually was, we couldn’t see down to the highway. We didn’t slow down; we just kept a steady pace in case someone was watching us. There weren’t any obvious signs of life on the island, well up close to the shore anyway. The island was thick with trees and shrubbery. If there were someone living on that island, they were staying deep in the middle. Charlie had told me not to look too hard at the island as if we were looking for someone, but just casually as if we were sight seeing.

  Now it made since why Tweddle got nervous when we told him we were going out to the island. He most likely knows there is someone out there and why they are there. Now we need to find Tweddle again and the answers to our questions. We decided to watch the island tonight from the highway for any activity, and not to let the ladies in on our newfound information. We decided to put them on the scent of Tweddle and the fact that he may try to make a hasty exit before they could get their hands on him. Between Edwardsville Days and trying to find Tweddle, this should keep them busy long enough for us to get done what we need to. I’ll talk to you later tonight and let you know if we see anything.

  Later

  Thursday Night

  Dear Mary,

  Well, we went up to the highway about 10pm. We drove up to the closest exit and parked the car, then walked down to where we could see the island the best without getting hit by traffic. Because this wasn’t Charlie’s first rodeo, we had taken a couple of those really comfy folding chairs and made sure we were on the other side of the concrete barrier.

  We sat there from 10pm till 2am. I’m still unclear as to whether we were on a stake out or surveillance. Charlie boiled it down the easiest way he could for me. A stakeout is when there is intent for an arrest to be made and surveillance is when there is no intention of an arrest to be made. Either way I needed to pee in the worst way and we both know how much I hate going to the bathroom outside. I did have the good sense to bring some toilet paper, baggie and some handy wipes.

  It wasn’t until around 1am that we saw the smallest amount of movement on the island. The only thing we did see was a light that came on ever so briefly, and it came on from in the middle of the island. It was on for maybe thirty seconds at most then went out, but that’s all we needed. We now knew for sure someone was staying on that island. We folded up our chairs and went back to the car. On our way back we thought whoever was out there may have a connection to the Burkhart case. No one would voluntarily go out to one of those pop-ups to live. You never know when it’s going to rain, and if that island is going to stay. Some of them do and some of them go back under. Mother Nature decides that. I just know you don’t want to be out there when the current of that river picks up and you don’t have a boat to help get you off that island.

  I was supposed to work the stand for the ladies, but I’m going to have to find someone to fill in for me. We think they will try to make their getaway on Saturday when everyone is down by the river for Edwardsville Days. Unless we’ve missed our mark, we’ve guessed that they have a partner helping them. So far our theory goes something like this: since the river is so calm there will be people out rowing around in their little boats. Some in costume, some not. We believe they will be in costume. We think this person’s partner will put their boat in up at the highway, stop off at the island, and pick up this person. They will row down, or in this case up the river and mix in with the others. No one will really notice them. They can dock their boat and casually walk right out of the festivities to their waiting car and disappear for good. No one will ever be the wiser. The hard part is going to be keeping an eye on them even if we do see them coming off the island. Yes Mary, we had thought of having water patrol waiting for them and snatching them as soon as the person from the island got into the boat. But there really is nowhere for water patrol to hide, the pick up person would see them and bail. No, we need them to think it’s going as planed. Once they get to the boat dock we’ve got them, on what I’m not sure. At this point, they are just persons of interest.

  Thank goodness we have one more day to get things ready and explain to the ladies why they aren’t going to be involved in this last part of the investigation. I’m really counting on Edwardsville Days, all the new drinks, and taking care of Tweddle filling up their time that it won’t be that big of a blow. Who am I kidding? They are going to want to be in on this. I’m just going to have to have a firm hand and stay strong. Again who am I kidding? I’m going to need Charlie there with me.

  I’m going to get a little sleep before a very long day starts for me.

  Talk to you later

  Friday

  Dear Mary,

  Well, this morning started very early. Not really, it started at its normal time. It just seemed earlier since I didn’t get to bed until very late. I do love waking up to the smell of coffee and breakfast cooking. It puts me in a good mood right off the bat. I went into the kitchen and the ladies were chatting away. Mostly about the food stand and costumes, which couldn’t have been better timing. I poured myself a cup of coffee and made my way to the table. The entire time they were talking they were making my breakfast as well.

  They briefly asked if Charlie was coming for breakfast, I said no and they went back to their conversation. Before I knew it I had a plate with 2 eggs over medium, 4 strips of extra crispy bacon and toast. They each had a seat on either side of me, they said, “You know Sid, we were thinking you could wear a pair of pants, with a period blouse. You’re going to be moving around too much to wear a skirt.” I said, “About that, I’m going to have Sally fill in for me. With the information we got from your confidential informant and the lead we got, Charlie and I are going to be working the entire day. Now you know I would tell you what it was we were working on if I could, but I can’t. So please don’t ask, I’m begging you.” They looked at one another with that “Oh I so wish we hadn’t agreed to that statement we signed,” mixed with a very proud look about their CI information working out.

  Then I said, “I ran into Tweddle yesterday. Now that Bob is gone he’s looking pretty run down. I don’t know if he’s sick or what. He said he didn’t know what he was going to do now that Bob’s gone. I thought you ladies should know about that. It won’t be long before the cooler weather starts setting in, and you know how susceptible Tweddle is to getting upper respiratory infections.” I really need to start keeping my phone at the ready to take pictures Mary. You should have seen the looks on their faces. This snapped them right out of their investigative funk. They said almost in unison, “Oh Sid, we need to call the other ladies and get on this.” Then Mrs. Edmonds said, “We are going to need to get some supplies together and get to him as soon as Edwardsville Days are over. We need to figure out where he’s going to stay. I know he stays at that shelter during the winter, but they kick everyone out during the day. He can’t be wandering the streets during the day.” Then Mrs. Houtz pipes in with, “We may have to invest in one of those little houses we’ve been seeing so much about on T.V.. We could all pitch in and buy it together, that way it won’t be so expensive and he’ll have a
place to stay all day long.” She didn’t stop there, I just kept nodding my head and put my dishes in the sink. She was going on about how she had seen some that were only a hundred square feet so it shouldn’t be that expensive. But I had to get ready. Charlie was going to be picking me up in a little while. Before I got out of the kitchen, they did manage to ask if I knew where they could find Tweddle. I told them I had talked to him down by the river, but he said that he and some of his buddies were headed towards Bonner, but that was a couple of days ago. I told them if they found him to let him know that Charlie and I needed to talk to him as well. Ha! If they find Tweddle they aren’t going to let go of him. We’ll be able to talk to him face to face. I don’t know if I’m happy or sad for Tweddle. A little of both I think.

  Charlie picked me up and we drove up to our spot on the highway to see if there may be a place for us to park that no one would notice us. We figured whoever was taking care of the person on the island was coming and going from that boat ramp up there. Now during the day a lot of people would go fishing on the river. So it wouldn’t be unusual to see a boat on the river. We found a place to park the car that we thought was out of sight or at least didn’t look suspicious. We stayed for about four hours. No one came. We would come back tonight and see if anyone showed up or if the light came back on.

  After our short surveillance, we went to the police department and talked to Sgt. Det. Langer and told him everything we talked about with Tweddle and the theory we had come up with. We told him we realized it wasn’t much to go on, but at this point it was all we could find and seemed like it could lead to something. He was good with it and said he could only spare a couple of officers, besides we didn’t want to draw too much attention. If there were more than the normal amount of officers present at the event, the potential suspects might panic. That’s when we decided they should be in costume with us. We told him we would like to let them get far enough away from the event grounds before making contact with them, so as not to make a huge deal out of something that may turn out to be nothing. He agreed that was a good idea.

  Our plan for tomorrow: Mark was going to get down to the river early in the morning, and I mean early. Like 5am early and hide up along the banks on the East end. That would be towards the tip of the island. He would stay there pretty much all day. If he saw any movement he was going to contact Charlie by radio and keep an eye on them and give a description to him. Of course Charlie and I would be in costume, and two of the Edwardsville police officers would be in boats and in costume as well. Everyone is going to keep their distance from them and just keep an eye on them. Once they got far enough away from the event, that’s when we would make contact with them. They may be anyone at all, they may not know anything at all about the Burkhart’s, but we need to know.

  So far there has been no sight of Tweddle. That ups the suspicion level for Charlie and I anyway. We aren’t going to waste any time trying to find him, what with the E-Mafia trying to find him. All of his things are still down at the river, so we know he’s still in town. As far as everyone else is concerned everything is going just fine, same as usual. Nothing new or exciting, talking about how much fun this year’s Edwardsville Days are going to be and how much money they will hopefully make.

  We went back home for dinner. The ladies had made a beautiful shrimp salad with stuffed cheese croutons. Charlie had stopped off at his house and picked up a bottle of wine that went great with the salad. For dessert they had made little Éclairs. They were rich, but so good. We had coffee with the Éclairs.

  We knew it was going to be a very long and busy day tomorrow, so it was an early evening, at least for the ladies. Talk about making it hard to keep your eyes open. Good thing we made a pot of coffee to take with us. We parked our car in our spot and waited and watched. Right at about 1am the light came on again for about thirty seconds and then went out again. Charlie had brought his binoculars this time and was scanning the banks to see if it was some kind of signal for someone. But he didn’t see a sign of anyone around. We couldn’t see Tweddle’s camp from this view, but he doubted very seriously if Tweddle was at his camp. Even if he was, he didn’t know if he would be able to see that light from his camp. Like I said, that island was much bigger than it looked from the bridge. The foliage was so thick we could barely see the light when it came on as it was.

  We waited a little longer to see if there was any of movement, but there was nothing. No acknowledging light from the shore. Nothing. Charlie dropped me off at home and said he would see me in a couple of hours, so sleep fast. Boy he wasn’t kidding.

  The ladies were fast asleep. I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but in a way I was hoping they might have been up. I wanted to know if they had run into Tweddle. If I remember, I’ll ask them in the morning.

  Talk to you in a bit

  Saturday

  Dear Mary,

  Well, today is the big day. Or should I say we are hoping it’s the big day. Mark was in place. The officers from the police department would be down later in costume to get a boat and get out on the river. Charlie and I helped the E-Mafia down to their booths to set up. Once we got them set up, we were off to get ourselves ready.

  Charlie and I went back to the house and changed into our costumes. Then went back and unloaded his boat back into the river and tied it off. I kept looking down towards Tweddle’s campsite but didn’t see any movement. I have a feeling he is either in hiding or has already taken off for the South. I’m not sure who he’s afraid of, the E-Mafia or the people we are trying to find. I’m personally hoping it’s the E-Mafia. I would hate to think he’s involved in the Burkhart case in any way shape or form.

  By the time we had gotten the ladies set up, and ourselves ready the parade had finished. People were showing up, looking around the craft booths and getting coffee. There were a lot of people in costume this year. The one exception was they all had up to date sunglasses on. Charlie and I decided to go ahead and get in the boat and float around on the river. I can’t even begin to tell you how uncomfortable that dress was. Well, I didn’t have the entire outfit on. I had pants on underneath and just the outer shell of the dress. I needed it to look like I was wearing the whole thing, but I was still uncomfortable.

  We got into the boat and floated around. Charlie had one of those ear pieces in, that way it wouldn’t be so obvious he was talking to Mark. We must have floated around for two hours. There weren’t that many other people out there with us. We went in and a couple of the officers came out. We walked up to the ladies’ booth and got some lunch. It was great. It was a warm day, so they went with that menu.

  The area was starting to fill up with people. So many of them had turned out in costume. Many more than we had expected. Everyone was either dressed like a flapper or a schoolmarm. Well, what I call a schoolmarm. They were very nice dresses, with a lovely hat that had a half veil. It came down just to the nose, making it impossible to tell who was under the hat. This was going to make it harder than we anticipated. It was going to make it much easier for whoever is out on that island to blend in with all the other people at the festival, but harder for us. It seems like this year’s turnout was larger than expected, another plus for them. So far it was all going their way.

  We headed back down to the boats. As we were trading out with the officers, Mark radioed that he saw a boat coming around the bend of the island. There were a man and woman on board. They were in costume. The woman was dressed like a schoolmarm so we couldn’t tell who she was, and the man had a full beard, sunglasses, and hat. There was no way to confirm the identity of the people in the boat from where he was.

  Charlie and I got into our boat and slowly started out. I had the same kind of hat and an umbrella for shade and Charlie’s back was to them because he was rowing. By now there were roughly 25 boats out on the river. We asked Mark to look for any distinguishing mark on the boat. We knew it was going to be hard, but he did find a small green scratch at the tip of the boat. We were fr
antically trying to catch up with them; as the officers were trying to casually make their way to down to the docking area. Mark was trying as best he could to run through the muck and weeds back to the beach area. By the time we all made it back to the docking area and found the boat with the small green scratch, the people in the boat were long gone. Poor Mark was thinking as hard as he could to come up with anything else that would distinguish them from every other schoolmarm around. Then he remembered that her umbrella had a dark cream-colored handle. The Chief had given us another plainclothes officer so there were six of us looking for this mystery pair. We decided they most likely hadn’t just bolted. They were probably trying to fit in and slowly make their way out. So our main priority was to find the woman with an umbrella with a dark cream-colored handle. I was going to keep an eye out for Tweddle. The officers had radioed a description of the woman and her umbrella to all of the officers, so the ones stationed at the exits of the park knew what to be looking for.

  Mary, we must have strolled around there for an hour or more. If it weren’t for my small bladder and the few porta-potties we most likely would have been looking for them all day. I opened the door to that porta-potty and there it was, a woman’s costume. We looked in a few others and found his. Now we have no idea what they look like, or what direction they’ve gone. I have to tell you, I’ve never felt so let down and, well I don’t know what it was I felt. I guess outsmarted. I had so many questions. Did they know we were watching them, or was that just part of their plan all along?