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Venera

Page 2

by Jay Rogoff


  for bouquet and everywhere

  a gray

  absence

  minutely detailed an obsessively exact

  disdain of color.

  What prospect

  for such a girl?

  What imaginary

  bridegroom? What invisible

  candle to light her chamber

  with mystery?

  What dance

  to possess the wrecked

  and serene foreigner

  raised among us our Barbara?

  For Malcolm in Carolina

  An only son

  an only son

  sent a thousand miles

  from crack wars and street sales

  to wander where the mockingbird whistles

  and not the police,

  where instead of a jaundiced streetlamp there’s

  the moon,

  south to paradise

  with tractors and machinery,

  hulks and explosions

  too beautiful, too filthy and dangerous

  to keep a seven-year-old away.

  To say he’s

  got a home

  in heaven or this poem—

  what comfort? He

  belongs where he can tell

  the mockingbird’s mood each minute

  and stain

  his hands with grass and cowshit

  to wash off in the rain,

  where he

  can ask on the telephone

  hard questions of his dad in a northern cell,

  whom he will someday see.

  Night Light

  Oil lamp glows

  in the dark lone house

  reflected

  in a mirror

  and two windows:

  four planets conjunct,

  bred into a small gala

  of light

  spilling out

  to where I stand, staining the perfected

  night

  whose stars

  are no mirrors

  but a struck conversation,

  a centuries-

  late invitation

  from abroad, translation

  impossible,

  the tongue

  inaudible

  the host long

  still.

  Which way home?

  The artificial

  lamp and its three

  shadows

  signal

  conjunction: walls, room

  and bed where you, love, lie

  sleeping, descending through household space.

  Paradise

  overhead is

  beckoning

  hourly, seductive with fire

  and black hole. Standing

  in desire

  between stained and stainless worlds of fire

  I feel welcome

  in both and neither, home

  in that I have no home.

  The Porch

  Before we built the porch

  the woods hammered the door.

  Coming home we’d plunge

  from poplars into the parlor

  where the hand-me-down albino

  upright slipping its grip

  in the bass confounds the tuner,

  where houseplants droop

  and the jumbled silverware

  can’t find its way

  home to the proper drawer

  or, when put there, stay.

  Pausing on the porch, our handmade

  halfway house

  from green rectitude

  into homemade chaos,

  we hear the cold trees mutter,

  Those unpaid

  bills… that unplumped sofa…

  that warm, unmade bed.…

  Loosening nail and splinter

  off the strict porch boards, bless

  these our wanderings into

  bewildering wilderness.

  Adirondack Scenic

  The blue-hung clouds dangle, a wavering curtain

  above the stage-flat lake, as though a show

  were about to start—I have a good seat

  on the cabin porch. Offstage a cardinal

  rehearses, some birds tune up, and from the trees

  a wood thrush flutes an air like Debussy.

  Offstage the loon begins an aria—

  a long note—carrying it out onto the water.

  A long note, a long note—and then it laughs,

  it can’t recall if this is tragedy

  or opera buffa. Back and forth it shuttles,

  deciding, and before I can call you out

  to catch the ending of the second act,

  asbestos clouds ring down, and I run

  inside, battered with the applauding rain.

  Butterfly Effect

  FOR ANNE DIGGORY

  Enchanted on the painting’s edge,

  a butterfly punctuates the page

  where marks of pigment aim to fasten

  explosions of a world passing—

  frozen faults, stalled waterfalls.

  The painter fixes wilderness

  securely as the clip’s black spring

  preventing the image from taking wing.

  Meanwhile the wings of the live insect

  waggle darkly to deflect

  an inch of air. Oceans away

  an ostrich shakes its plumes in snow

  and ice caps swell the polar seas

  as your lips brush my eyelashes.

  Fastening here, fluttering there,

  which wings tune the darkening air?

  Chrome skeleton? Black gossamer?

  Translations

  Starts somewhere in a subcutaneous

  shudder, somewhere beneath the heart,

  gut feelings parsing into syllables

  about as easily as I can translate

  the chocolate warble of the hermit thrush

  fluting through a gauze of trees

  like blood through a pinprick or tears through ducts;

  its trill erupts—doutz brais e critz— You tussle

  with German in the bedroom, courting the vampire’s

  heart, while I ransack our nervous

  system. The birdsong charms its listeners,

  striking us dumb. What is the meaning of this?

  Dazzle

  For such blue this dazzle

  what sacrifice? None

  too great, none.

  Let liars in public trust go free?

  All day.

  Saints tear

  singer and soothsayer?

  Wives

  and husbands strop knives

  in the jealous sun?

  Out of our power. Our power

  lies in dazzle,

  our responsibility

  to such explosion

  as eyes’ blue

  through

  my irising,

  through

  to the nerve,

  a perpetual

  losing

  of all

  but dazzle,

  a flirtation

  with

  the perfumes of the palpable

  an embrace cruel as the grave,

  as strong as death,

  the sky in desire open

  upon

  the slow dazzle

  of this world, at once redeeming and reducing

  us two

  in consummate dazzle

  to full

  zero.

  Intercourse

  “You guys stayed up talking so late.

  How come you talk so much?

  Are you going to talk again tonight?”

  My knee nudges

  your knee; you tell your boy we’re sorry,

  we’ll talk quieter.

  He thinks a moment—that’s okay

  with him—and goes. You stare

  at me like a schoolgirl, and we count

  the possibilities:

  1. Like kids in Wordsworth, he meant

&nb
sp; it: talking. 2. He’s

  speaking euphemistically

  to (a) prevent his blushing

  at knowing what he wants to know,

  (b) pretend our thrashing

  about comes as a trick of the chaste

  night air so he need not

  know, or (c) act unembarrassed

  at our blushing that

  we know he knows. Such ceremony.

  Knowledge is quickening,

  delivering grief or joy

  talking or fucking.

  Orienting

  Cold facts can drive you nuts, what’s what, when’s when,

  late spring snow subverting what calendar

  we keep beneath the garden’s amorous trees,

  collecting swiftly round our feet and—fragrant?

  Oh! it’s blossoms—smell their delirious drift.

  And isn’t our love like that? Isn’t it

  urgent as fragrant petals, cool, skin-soft,

  fluttering down to pile up in our palms

  but disappearing at a touch, huge flakes

  melting as the sea embraces them?

  Mother and Child

  1

  Hell of a place to start a family:

  an abandoned building, a reek like a stable,

  glittering with broken glass, rich with animal

  filth, where a teenaged girl nurses her baby.

  His lips clutch; she snugs him like a stuffed toy;

  the remote father hangs, invisible.

  A family? I love her impossible

  imagination, her holy naiveté

  here in the darkness. Around them fires bloom

  where folks cook up their desperate sustenance—

  how solemn their night progress to the heavens,

  entered through a needle in the arm.

  They kneel crystal with offerings, their waters

  distilled in the effulgence of her face.

  2

  Bringing forth glory on her own without

  wise doctors or shepherding midwives—the rubble,

  the shining shards, a frightened girl in trouble

  with one star dancing in the firmament

  haloing her through a shattered casement,

  a pickle jar for Jordan pot—Godawful,

  simply undivine, unbearable,

  a watermelon bursting through her cunt.

  Instead of screaming she felt the world shout

  (she cried for her bible); instead of blood

  she sniffed a lack of sanitation, a primal

  lack of grace. Still, she’d done it with her body

  and smiled: no need of anyone! as night

  engulfed the ruins. The child began to squall.

  3

  My antennae sniffing out this young woman,

  I hereby declare my desire to nurture

  and… love? I’d even change his diaper

  as long as I might advertise as mine

  that glowing, otherworldly flesh. Alone!

  I’d shadow her into a leafy arbor,

  hoarding the secret liquids of my ardor

  rising in me in an eternal groan

  like Apollo in his fever. If she turned

  into a tree spreading her limbs, I’d abide

  forever in the odors of her shade

  descending aurorally about my face

  and savor fruit instead of fruitlessness,

  plucking the fatherhood for which I’d burned.

  4

  It might be malnutrition, but she swears

  she hears an orchestra of fiddling angels

  whose music she inhales, although it jangles

  like hip-hop, like the dying fall that pours

  in from the street, from boys in stolen cars.

  She hears him snaking through the bass viols,

  his determined intonation, his sinuous

  chord smelling of violent death. Through tears

  (it might be malnutrition) she can spy

  only rainbows. Wait: a leg, a gold arm

  now crystallizing, see those platinum wings

  whooping it up, having a heavenly time—

  how can she step in time, eternally?

  Rising, she whirls her baby as they dance.

  5

  We’re damned, exiled to kingdoms of earth,

  given time to live in, given place,

  given phlegm, bile, blood, sexual disease,

  given air that won’t sustain a breath.

  He can expect an early, tragic death,

  given gang wars, the greasy-palmed police,

  beatitudes of crack: compared with these

  the pains of birth erupted like a laugh.

  Around her ignorant finger his fist has curled.

  She’s seized by joy. Death is impossible.

  Nursing, nectar at her erect nipple

  thrilling her, she trembles with the heavens,

  and like all teenaged mothers she believes

  the baby at her breast will save the world.

  Life Sentence

  At the bouquet of daffodils

  from the prison greenhouse

  nurtured and gathered

  lovingly

  by the hands of a killer

  with Harley

  tattoos,

  hands that caress

  the stems—as the guard

  marveling over his shoulder

  at his work has never

  dared

  even in dream touch his own wife—

  and then quickly coolly cut

  their green life

  out like a light

  like a lover

  her look—

  sun burst from cloud,

  liquid

  fire you couldn’t get

  even if you put

  all those blossoms in a blender—

  somehow her look

  took

  its light

  from the cut

  flowers, a look

  that under-

  stood

  only the body

  in its volatile

  cells can create the nerve-

  shimmering wave

  we love to lie about and call

  soul,

  love

  giving no reprieve

  no escape save

  the daily

  dalli-

  ance, the descent

  into the bouquet of fire where we give

  off

  all heat

  all light.

  Dirty Linen

  In your absence everything

  inhabits your scent:

  empty coffee cup, sandwich, paper and ink,

  all redolent

  as the nylon, rayon, cotton

  scattered when you unsheathe,

  the pattern

  of their fall

  a deciduous riot,

  rhythms of smell

  rank as air sculpted by Sappho or Wyatt—

  there’s a man I really believe’s in heaven,

  when her loose gown from her shoulders did fall—

  head spins to breathe.

  Nerves flirt with overload

  till to inhale

  one more charged

  molecule,

  one part more per mil-

  lion could kill—

  Yet good is the life ending faithfully:

  to have all matter knock

  with your olfactory

  hallucination, and public

  moments veiled with the pungent shock

  of privacy.

  Only Child

  A small child is standing at the bed.

  That’s what you said,

  that’s what you’re saying as I shake

  off the shock

  of your voice

  rocking me awake;

  then your eyes

  open

  and you chant this text:

  Can you remember what I said?

  C
an you remember— —You said

  A small child is standing at the bed.

  —Before that, before I woke. I think I asked

  Who are you? What’s your name? Who are you? —And then?

  —I can’t remember what will happen

  next.

  Something

  awful, something

  terrible.

  That’s why I wake. —Something to the child?

  —I can’t remember.

  Hold

  me.

  You breathe deep, talk of your daughter

  off at school, your boy

  off with his father.

  Imagine:

  the only child to get you up at night for water

  is the small child of this visitation—

  voice jingling

  like smashed glass, hand dangling

  an eyeless bear—

  our child. I cradle you, your back

  and bottom sweating in the dark.

  We breathe together,

  and the dark at my back

  cradles me.

  Laughter

  They resolved to invite to Florence the best craftsmen in Italy

  to make in competition, as a trial specimen of their work, a

  scene in bronze.… For the subject, they chose Abraham sac-

  rificing Isaac, considering that this would test the competitors

  in all the problems of their craft.…

  —GIORGIO VASARI, Lives of the Artists

  1

  Anyone can model men from mud.

  Make them better! Cast in bronze relief

  to make us gasp and cast out disbelief—

  in what? Is it incredible, a God

  demanding child abuse? infanticide?

  suffusing his concoction—flesh—with love

  so faulty it flees at the drop of a knife,

  its bronze clattering down the mountainside?

  Well, can you do it? Entries must include

  one ass, one fat ram anxious to dissolve

  into a thicket, two slaves goofing off,

  and popping like a rocket from a cloud

  one punctual angel with a timeless shout,

  zeroing on that bright glint at the throat.

  2

  Maybe any birth’s miraculous

  but if your husband wined and dined a stranger

  billing himself as heaven’s messenger

  annunciating your new fruitfulness—

  yes, you, enduring second menopause!—

  so what if he ate with unearthly hunger,

  turning your cakes and venison to ether,

  your wine to air, your kid to sacrifice?

 

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