by M. C. Vann
“Okay, I know ... I know,” I repeated, feeling the burn in my eyes. I wanted to ask him what sparked his desire to change, but I decided to leave it. It probably took every last sliver of his courage and pride to tell me he was trying.
“Your birthday is coming up,” he mentioned as the air suddenly felt lighthearted. “What would you like to do?”
I looked at him surprised that he actually remembered my birthday when I didn’t even remember it myself. “You remembered?”
“It’s February first, right?” he asked. “This Friday?”
I slowly nodded as a tear managed to escape, but before it could fall deeper, Henry reached over and brushed away my tear lightly with the pad of his thumb. I leaned forward and embraced him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I tightened my grip on him and pull him closer to me. I felt his arms laced around my back too while his nose nuzzled into my neck. I wanted to cherish this moment before pulling away.
He rested a hand on my cheek and smiled gently. “So … what will it be?”
I removed his hand and played with his fingers bashfully, keeping my eyes on our intertwined hands. “Can I have anything?”
“Anything, just say the word and it’s yours.”
“You. I just want to spend it with you,” I replied. I smiled back at him as my eyes were still welled with tears. “If that’s not too much to ask.”
His lips gradually spread into another smile. Bliss flashed in his eyes as he looked at me until he broke our gaze for a fleeting moment to look at my lips. He leaned in further, letting his lips linger over mine for just a second before pressing them softly but firmly together.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
When I woke the next morning, my lips were already fixed in a permanent smile. The soft caress of Henry’s lips on mine was something I thought I’d never feel again. It was as if everything that happened yesterday was a dream. Was it only a dream?
After getting ready for work, I walked out of the house towards the direction of the garage, but it wasn’t hard to notice Henry’s car parked in the driveway. My eyes widened when I noticed his back leaning into the driver’s side door. He was already dressed appropriately for work. His burly arms were crossed against his chest as he looked downward at his feet.
Was he waiting for someone? Me, perhaps?
“Henry?” I called out.
He turned around immediately with an astonished expression on his face for just a moment before he walked around the hood of the car to me. He greeted me with an innocent smile. “Good morning.”
“Good morning. Were you waiting for someone?”
He bit his bottom lip before bashfully kicking his feet. “Would you mind … if I accompany you to work this morning?”
Did I hear that correctly? Henry was offering to take me to work? He detested the idea of me working at Horizon only a week ago. I’d have agreed in a millisecond if I wasn’t so confused. I wasn’t used to this Henry. Although he was similar to his old self and being nice again, this side of Henry was more discreet and diligent in his actions toward me.
But I suddenly thought back to his words — he was trying. Yesterday wasn’t a dream.
“I wouldn’t mind at all,” I answered.
The ride to my workplace was quiet, but a bearable one, unlike the few past times. Though I tried not to stare too much for too long at him, I could see there was something on his mind. We arrived outside the Horizon building in little time and as I reached for the door handle, Henry called out my name at the same moment his hand stretched out to stop me from leaving. The sudden contact unsettled my thoughts and even more so when he pulled my hand down my lap, his hand still around mine.
“Yes, Henry?”
He considered something for a long second. His striking green eyes conveyed a hidden message that seemed to be of great importance. “Did you want to have lunch with me later?”
“Uh, yeah. Yes.” I blinked, astounded once again. Was that his important question? “My lunch is at twelve thirty. Will that work for you?”
“I will clear my schedule,” he said, pressing on another smile. “Have a good day at work, Ally.”
“You too,” I said.
Henry loosened his hand on mine, allowing for me to leave. I thought I heard him whisper something behind me, but the sound of the car door closing drowned it out. I turned around to wave goodbye to him and he only smiled at me before disappearing from my sight.
This was all so unusual. I know I should be happy. I should be absolutely and completely overjoyed that this was happening. But I wasn’t. And I couldn’t understand it at first.
When Henry’s face appeared before me, I knew there was something he was holding back. There was a profound trace in his eyes, unveiling a subtle trace of sadness. And that was why I wasn’t happy. Because he wasn’t happy. I could see it clearly behind the strained smile he wore.
The text tone of my phone brought me back to reality. I checked my phone and saw a text from Henry. Upon reading his name, there was the familiar delay in my reaction again. I don’t even remember the last time Henry had texted me like this. I slid my finger across the screen to reply to his text.
I’m outside, he texted.
He was outside? Why? I looked at the clock on the wall and realized it was five minutes past my lunch time I told Henry.
Okay. Be there in 2 minutes, I quickly sent. I hurriedly grabbed my bag and clocked out before heading out.
Henry stood outside the revolving doors, his front facing me with his hands in his pockets. When he locked eyes with mine through the glass, a gentle smile appeared on his lips, and I returned the smile. He looked much calmer than this morning.
“Where are we going?” I asked, practically jumping onto the tips of my toes.
“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “How about we stop at the nearest place we see?”
I agreed and nodded, making light of the situation. No matter what we chose, we were both in for the surprise. We walked down two blocks before he turned into a small restaurant called Mali’s Cafe, located right at the corner of the street.
The atmosphere was very different compared to the previous restaurants Henry had taken me to. Everything had color here. There were windows all around, letting the natural light of the sun illuminate each inch of the room. It was safe to say this would be one of my favorite places.
Henry ordered the Salmon Benedicts for himself, and I got the House Salad, examining it in contrast to our personalities. His dish cost nearly twenty dollars while mine was commonly known and barely worth ten dollars.
“How was work?” Henry asked.
“Is that the only question you know how to ask me?” I couldn’t stop myself from saying out loud. But I was glad I didn’t hold myself back because Henry — for the first time today and in a long time — laughed. He actually laughed. Though it was small, his laugh was genuine in every way.
Okay, then,” he said, defeated. He adjusted himself to the edge of his chair, resting his forearms on the table and eyed me with a cocked brow. “What would you like me to ask?”
I bit my lip, mulling over his question. Maybe I should have kept my mouth shut and answered his simple question. After thinking about it for a minute, I finally came up with something worth asking about. “Ask me about what I did for my last birthday.”
“What did you do for your last birthday?” He humored me while leaning forward and listening attentively.
“It was a typical birthday. I had brunch with Lily and Adam — the usual tradition. Then, we went to Eve’s house and they would ‘surprise’ me with a home-made confetti cake with whipped cream frosting. I would always make fun of my sister because she would do the writing on the cake, and it always looked awful.”
“Do you miss them?” Henry asked, keeping a straight face. “Your friends and your family?”
Almost a month had passed since I had seen them. Though Nancy, Lily, and Adam all lived i
n the city, we never saw each other. Mostly because I didn’t want to even though Henry forbade me. I didn’t want to lie in front of them about my marriage with Henry. And Eve’s little family of her own was now miles away from Chicago. Just thinking about them — especially Alexis and Eason — made my heart ache.
I nodded, staring down at the tabletop. “Yes, I do. I think about them every day.”
“Are you disappointed that you don’t get to spend it with them this year?” His voice was low as the words slipped from his lips.
“What?” My eyes darted towards Henry, slightly worried that he would even ask such a question.
He watched me under a pair of alert eyes, observing every little bit of my expression. “Are you … disappointed?”
“No,” I replied promptly. “I’m not disappointed. Why would you even think that?”
“Because nobody likes change.”
“Henry,” I said, staring right back at him and hoping to convey my honesty. “When I told you yesterday that all I wanted was to spend my birthday with you, I meant it from the bottom of my heart.”
—————
“Happy Birthday, Ally.”
I looked up from my desk and spotted a high-spirited Nick reclined forward with his elbows against one of the walls around my cubicle.
“How did you know?” I asked. I flicked my head in all directions to make sure no one heard him. Not one person has said that to me today, not even Henry. It was mainly because he had to leave early for work so he couldn’t wait for me this morning.
“Why’s that important? What’s important is what you’re doing for your birthday.” He slyly attempted to change the subject, but I continued to eye him suspiciously.
“You looked at my information, didn’t you?”
“I reserve the right to know about my employees.”
He wasn’t even denying it! But maybe that was what made Nick so approachable. He was honest about his intentions.
“So, what are you doing? Anything special for tonight?” he continued to pester me with a deceptively charming grin.
Now that I thought about it, Nick was constantly in a cheery mood, always wearing that grin. What did Juliet say about him again? “Always partying with randos.” I didn’t know why I was hesitant on telling him that I was spending it with Henry. It wouldn’t be out of the ordinary for a wife to spend her birthday with her husband.
“Not special really. Just the usual like every birthday,” I said. “Dinner and a maybe a movie.”
“Are you asking me out on a date?” he questioned and I gaped at him, horrified that he would say such an outrageous thing out loud. He knew others were aware of my marriage so the reason why he would spout such nonsense…
“What? No!” I lowered my voice suddenly, realizing that my loud tone might catch other people’s attention. “I wasn’t—I wasn’t asking you—”
“I was only joking, Ally,” Nick assured me as I fumbled for words.
I let out a relieved breath. “That’s good to know.”
“You still owe me a drink, you know?”
“I do?”
“You don’t remember?” Nick asked, and I slowly shook my head. “I’m offended, Ally. You didn’t take the shot I poured you. Your knight in shining armor came to your rescue, remember?”
He was referring to that? Why would I owe him a drink for that?
“I guess?” I said, my tone wavering.
“I’ll remind you at a later time. Anyway, I’ll see you on Monday,” Nick told me. “I’m glad you decided to stay here.”
Before I could open my mouth to ask what he meant, the blonde, blue-eyed man walked away from my desk. Nick was starting to become very peculiar. He seemed to be poking fun at me, but there was a quiet whisper in between his jokes indicating much more. I didn’t ponder it too much. I needed to get all this work done so I could enjoy the rest of the day with Henry.
When it was finally time to leave, I nearly sprinted out of my cubicle. I couldn’t wait another second to begin the evening with Henry. As I stepped onto the escalator, my eyes drifted to the exit, but to my disappointment, he wasn’t there. My spirits fell, thinking he had forgotten or he was busy. My eyes roamed to the bottom of the escalators where he stood there waiting.
My heart soared at the mere sight of him. He wore a pair of dark blue jeans — the first time I’d ever seen him wear jeans — and he was bundled up in a dark green fur coat. His hair wasn’t styled up like it usually was; it was messy, slightly concealing his forehead. It was very similar to how it was the first time I laid eyes on him.
“Ready to go?” he asked.
I chuckled. “I was born ready.”
Henry got on the highway and drove north into the snow-covered countryside. After about an hour and a half, we arrived at a big cabin home. The sky grew darker earlier during this time of the year so by the time we arrived, it was almost pitch dark. The eerie surrounding only reminded me of the last time Henry took me to a similar place, our honeymoon or rather the nightmare I didn’t want to relive.
“Shall we go inside?” Henry asked.
I turned to look at him, hiding my thoughts with a smile. He gently took my hand in his, and we walked into the unlit house. Once we were inside, he led me into the living room, refusing to turn on the lights.
“Wait right here, okay?”
I gulped. “Okay.”
Henry’s figure disappeared into the dark. I tried to remain calm and kept my thoughts positive while he was gone. But as the seconds dragged on, I grew more anxious being alone in a dark, dingy room. Doubt crept into my mind and despite my best efforts to remain positive, my silent thoughts overpowered the deafening silence in the room.
What if Henry was lying to me? What if he suddenly turned back to being cold and cruel? What if …
Suddenly, I saw a faint light floating closer to me from the corner of the room. In the flickering shadow of the candles stood Henry holding a small birthday cake with the two lit candles, a two and a four. He steadily walked toward me singing Happy Birthday in an out-of-tune voice. Moved by the simple gesture, the tears began to surface, blurring my vision. After he had finished singing, he held the cake out to me.
“Make a wish,” he spoke gently.
I closed my eyes and blew out the candles after making a silent wish.
“Thank you, Henry.”
“It’s confetti cake with whipped cream frosting,” he told me, somewhat proudly. “I made it this morning after you left.”
“You did?” So, that was the reason why he wasn’t there this morning.
“And another thing ...”
Our song came on — Frank Sinatra’s “Always.” Henry placed the cake down on a corner accent table. The lights just barely dimmed before he pulled me into his embrace. His arms wrapped above my shoulders as my arms slowly cinched around his waist. Relieved, I inched my head closer to the side of his chest, hearing the beat of his heart softly drumming against my ear. It was a mediating sound.
“Happy Birthday, Ally,” he whispered, locking me tighter in his arms.
“Thank you,” I said again through tears. I closed my eyes, relishing the precious moments as we swayed together in the intimate lighting. “I was afraid … that you would go back to your old self.”
Henry didn’t answer me right away, nor did he tense up like I half-expected him to. Instead, I felt him pull away. He rested his fingers underneath my chin, raising it up so that our eyes met.
“I won’t go back there,” he stated plainly. Carefully, he stroked a finger along my hairline, bringing the hairs hanging by the side of my face behind my ear.
“You won’t lie to me anymore, right?”
He shook his head.
“You won’t hurt me again?”
He shook his head again. Though he didn’t confirm it verbally, I could feel the sincerity flowing from his eyes. The way he was looking at me so dearly. The way he was h
olding me so closely. I knew my Henry had returned to me. The one who cared and worried for me. This alone was enough to satisfy my wish.
For the rest of the evening, Henry and I sat on the couch in the living room and enjoyed the cake. We talked about random things like we used to in the past before I slowly drifted to sleep in his arms.
When I woke up in the middle of the night, I was still in Henry’s arms, one around me while the other rested off the arm rest. I looked and noticed he was fast asleep. I shut my eyes and leaned into his chest again, wishing we could stay like this forever.
After what seemed like only a few seconds, I woke again to lights streaming through the windows, realizing I was alone this time. A cotton throw was placed over me and as my eyes searched the room, the person I was looking for appeared nowhere in sight.
“You’re awake.”
I spun my head toward the direction of the sound and felt at ease upon hearing his voice.
“Morning,” I replied. I mentally noted that Henry was still in his attires from yesterday.
He bent down to his knees beside me and tenderly caressed my hair. “What would you like for breakfast?”
I didn’t have an appetite for anything this morning. I was actually feeling rather dizzy, probably due to dehydration and eating nothing but cake for dinner. But since it was Henry, I didn’t want him to feel bad. “Hmmm ... how about scrambled eggs and toast?”
“That’s all?”
“Yes.”
“You’re making it too easy for me, Ally,” Henry said with a chuckle. He placed a kiss on the top of my head. “You go shower, and I’ll have it ready for you, okay?”
I nodded as he walked back into the kitchen. As soon as he was gone, I felt a little uneasy at the words he used. “You’re making it too easy for me?” He didn’t mean anything by those words, did he?
Stop it, Ally. I needed to trust Henry. I needed to trust that he wasn’t going to lie to me nor hurt me anymore. He made it very clear and I had to believe him.