Holding a Hero

by Layne, Lyssa

  Without thinking about it and caught up in the moment, she put her hands on his neck and kissed him back. They stood in the hallway of St. Luke’s where everyone could see them, both lost in the passionate kiss. It reminded her of when they were dating and she had looked forward to these moments with him. No sooner had the memory come to her, she was brought back to reality and Jesse who was at home waiting on her. She quickly leaned back breaking the kiss.

  He grinned at her. “I just wanted to tell you thanks.” He kissed her again quickly and turned to head back to his new daughter.

  Katy stood there trying to focus on what had just happened. She looked around to see who noticed. There were two nurses in the hallway whispering to each other. At the far end of the hallway, she saw her best friend. She jogged toward her, but Tiffany was already moving in the opposite direction.

  “Tiff. Tiffany!”

  Tiffany kept moving toward the elevator. She punched the down button a few times as Katy caught up to her.

  “Hey, I was calling you,” Katy said.

  Tiffany shrugged without looking at her. “Guess I didn’t hear you.”

  Katy touched her arm. “I thought you were off tonight. What are you doing up here?”

  Tiffany pulled her arm away. “I heard Sarah had gone into labor.”

  Katy stared at Tiffany’s arm as she moved it. “I didn’t realize you two were friends.”

  Tiffany hit the button again. “We’re not, but she’s a colleague so I thought I should be here.”

  Katy nodded, completely confused by Tiffany’s reasoning. The nurses never befriended the interns, Tiffany and Katy’s friendship was the rare exception. “Well, did you go see her?”

  Tiffany turned to her and said loudly, “No, I didn’t, because the doctor who delivered her baby was making out with her baby’s daddy in the middle of the hallway.”

  Katy’s faced turned crimson and she looked around to see who had heard Tiffany’s outburst. “It was a thank you kiss, it meant nothing.”

  Tiffany threw up her hands. “It meant nothing to you, not to Jeremiah. You’re busy playing house and getting laid by Jesse, so just leave him alone. Let him move on and get over you!”

  Katy wasn’t sure where this empathy for Jeremiah was coming from. Tiffany had never felt this strongly about him before. Obviously, something was wrong with her best friend, especially with the dig on Jesse.

  “Tiff, I don’t know what’s wrong. If it’s the mystery guy, or what, but—”

  Tiffany cut her off. “Just leave me alone, ok? Leave Jeremiah alone, leave us all alone. Go be the perfect little FDNY wife until the next one comes along, okay?”

  The elevator doors opened and Tiffany stepped in. Katy stared at her, stunned to silence as she watched her so-called best friend’s face disappear behind the doors.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Smoke filled the kitchen of the fire house as it always did. The kitchen was the designated smoking place. Jesse took in a deep breath, inhaling the nicotine he still missed on occasion. He’d started smoking when he was in the fire academy, because that’s what all the veteran firefighters did. Nick, who was Mr. Healthy, refused to even be in the room when others lit up.

  It was mid-afternoon and Engine 58 crew had just finished a late lunch. The veterans were working this shift so they could attend the annual St. Patrick’s Day Ball that evening. It meant the probys would take over while the veterans let loose and had a good time. Katy had agreed to go this year and actually talked Abby into going as Murph’s date since his wife never attended. Two years ago, Jesse had taken Katy while Nick helped out the probys. Even then, Jesse enjoyed having her on his arm, and he was looking forward to it again tonight. The only issue was that they still hadn’t come clean to anyone other than the Garrity family, Murph, and Tiffany.

  Jesse looked around the room to make sure he and Murph were alone. Jesse watched the older man puff on his cigar slowly. Murph looked at him and blew smoke in his direction.

  “Say what’s on your mind, kid.”

  Jesse tapped his fingers on the table. “Tonight’s the night.”

  Murph raised his eyebrow. “I thought you’d lost your virginity a while ago.”

  Jesse threw a pretzel at him. “At the ball, telling the guys about Katy.”

  Murph leaned back and puffed on his cigar not saying a word. Jesse leaned forward waiting for some kind of response.

  Murph finally looked at him. “It’s your grave you’re digging.”

  Jesse sighed. “So what do I do? Keep hiding it? It’s not going away, Murph, I love her. I’m going to marry her...one day.”

  Murph stood up, patted his shoulder and said, “You do what you have to do, O’Neil.”

  Jesse leaned back in his chair, irritated at Murph’s reaction. All he wanted was the man’s blessing. He knew if Murph had his back then the other guys would be okay with it. Perhaps he’d better rethink things.

  ***

  Jesse looked in the mirror while he buttoned his official FDNY dress uniform. His hands were shaking as he finished. He felt like it was his first date ever. After Murph’s comment, he was still undecided what he would do tonight. The only thing he’d decided on was that he’d wait to see if the right time came around.

  He picked up his hat and grabbed the keys to Katy’s Yukon. She was getting ready at Abby’s house so he had to swing by to pick up Murph and then the ladies. He turned the radio up, letting AC/DC blare while he tried to shake his nerves. Ten minutes later, he arrived at Murph’s house.

  Jesse went inside and visited with Mrs. Murphy who sent them on their way with a tray full of baked goods. He promised to keep Murph out of trouble and kissed her cheek goodbye. Once in the car, he turned the SUV toward Abby’s house. Murph still hadn’t said a word.

  Jesse glanced over at him. “Your silence is deafening.”

  Murph shook his head, waiting another thirty seconds before speaking. “I watched you two grow up, never thought I’d see you in this position.” Jesse watched him out of the corner of his eye. “Nick Garrity was the best damn firefighter Engine 58 saw, his brother a close second. When Nick finally found his Mrs. Garrity, he had it all. He’d been waiting awhile for her, hadn’t he?”

  Jesse nodded, uneasy about where the conversation was headed. “Katy’s a good girl. She jumped into that family without hesitation—taking care of Lisa, Nick, Andy, hell now even Ryan’s girls. Shame those two didn’t even get a year together.”

  Murph looked away from the window he’d been staring out and turned to Jesse. “Seems as though you’ve stepped into Nick’s shoes.”

  Jesse pulled into Abby’s driveway and shut off the engine turning to Murph. “I guess it does.”

  Murph clapped his shoulder. “If Garrity had a choice, I don’t think he’d pick anyone other than you to love her and his kid.”

  Jesse smiled. “Yeah?”

  Murph nodded. “Absolutely. I know you’re looking for my approval, but I think his is the only one you need.” Jesse nodded and shook his hand. As always, Murph was right.

  ***

  Katy’s fingers wrapped around Jesse’s arm. It’d been two years since she’d attended the St. Paddy’s Ball. The last time, everyone was skeptical of her having married one of their own after barely a month of knowing each other. This time, she was coming as the date of a firefighter who wasn’t her husband. She glanced up at Jesse, who was beaming with her on his arm. She smiled and squeezed his arm as he looked down at her proudly.

  “You’d better hide that smile or you’ll give us away,” she teased.

  He grinned. “Maybe that’s my plan…”

  Jesse leaned down and kissed her cheek as Katy looked up at him surprised. He laughed and took her pashmina. The men checked their coats while Abby and Katy found a table to sit at. The ballroom was decked out in shades of green and gold and almost at maximum capacity with all the firemen and their dates.

  As they found seats, Abby fidgeted, smoothing imaginary wr
inkles on her pale pink dress. Her other hand sliding her cross pendant back and forth along the chain of her necklace.

  “Relax,” Katy said with a smile and lightly touched her hand.

  Abby took a deep breath. “Sorry, it’s just been over ten years since I’ve been to one of these.”

  “And you look gorgeous, so men will be buying you drinks all night.”

  She let out a nervous giggle. “I don’t know about that.”

  Katy nodded to a firefighter making his way toward them. Abby started to iron out another wrinkle, but Katy grabbed her hand to stop her.

  The tall, good looking Irish man gave a slight bow as he reached their table. “Good evening, ladies. I’m Lieutenant Chambers from Ladder 28.”

  They each shook his hand. “I have to ask, aren’t you the wid—, eh wives, of the Garrity brothers?”

  Tears sprang to Katy’s eyes as she nodded, afraid to speak or even look in Abby’s direction. She started to stand up, reaching for Abby to get them out of the room. Before either woman could make a run for it, Murph slapped Chambers’ shoulder a little harder than needed.

  “Well, well, Chambers, to what do we owe the pleasure?”

  Lieutenant Chambers turned to face him, extending his hand to shake it, which Murph ignored. “I saw these beautiful women and came to inquire if they were married to the Garrity brothers. How’ve you been, Murph?”

  By now, Jesse had arrived and he slid his arm around Katy’s waist, pulling her close to him, making her feel safe. Likewise, Murph draped his arm over Abby’s shoulders. He ignored Chambers’ nicety as he answered. “Our dates this evening are in fact the amazing wives of the best damn firefighters that FDNY has ever seen. If you’ll excuse us, we plan on flaunting their beauty in your face tonight while you stand in the corner, dateless, with your crew.”

  With that, the men led the Garrity wives away from Chambers whose jaw clenched in anger. When they were out of earshot, Jesse and the girls started laughing. Abby looked gratefully at Murph and said, “Thank you.”

  He nodded. “I only speak the truth, my lady.” He kissed her hand and he pulled her onto the dance floor.

  Katy looked up at Jesse. “Well, that was an exciting start to the evening.”

  Jesse started to kiss her and stopped. “I’m sure as the drinking gets going, there will be even more excitement.” He finished his beer and grabbed her hand, pulling her onto the dance floor with Murph and Abby.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  The more Murph drank, the more stories he told, especially the ones everyone already had memorized. Tonight’s topic was the crew of Ladder 28. Murph was set on teaching them a lesson.

  Jesse hadn’t left Katy’s side all night. He’d refrained from kissing her, which would have been an obvious sign they were more than friends, but he didn’t stop himself from caressing her and letting his hands run free. He couldn’t help himself. She looked out of this world in that light green evening gown. It was a halter cut and backless, which displayed her athletic shoulders and back. Jesse was using every ounce of control he had to keep his hands from doing more to her. Besides, he figured if anyone said anything, he’d blame the alcohol.

  He pulled her closer as they danced to Into the Sky. She rested her head against the crisp, light blue shirt he’d worn under his navy FDNY jacket. Neither of them spoke as they listened to the words. When the chorus was repeated, he could feel her crying against him and he gently rubbed her bare back. As the song finished, she looked up into his face. “Thank you,” she whispered.

  He nodded and kissed her forehead before taking her hand. “Let’s take a break and get a drink.”

  She wiped her eyes and followed him to the bar. He didn’t let go of her hand as they made their way through the crowd. When they reached the bar, she glanced around nervously, but his hand tightened around hers.

  He turned to her. “You can relax now. Everyone is so drunk, they won’t remember if I do this.” He leaned down and lightly pressed his lips against hers.

  She returned a short intense kiss, but didn’t leave her lips there for long. She smiled and whispered, “You’re such a rebel.”

  She gave him another quick peck on the lips then said, “I’m going to go to the ladies’ room and I’ll meet you back at the table.”

  Jesse nodded and watched her walk off. He couldn’t wait to get her home and out of that dress. He’d replenished the condom supply so he knew she couldn’t say no. He turned back around to get their drinks and stood face to face with Missey Keefe.

  She grinned at him, walking her fingers over the buttons of his dress shirt. Missey was Nick’s ex. He’d found her in bed with one of their classmates, Jake Keefe, who now worked over at Engine 75. Missey had married Jake, but he was notorious for messing around behind her back. Missey tried to do the same, but she only went after firefighters and the men all knew better than to get involved her.

  “Hey there, Jesse. I missed you last year.” She batted her eyelashes at him.

  “Yeah, I think I had to work or something,” he lied, although he remembered exactly where he was last year—consoling Katy.

  She called his bluff, smirking as she did. “Something like taking care of Nick’s widow?”

  Jesse felt his stomach knot up. He hated the word widow almost as much as Katy did. For some reason, it seemed like an insult, although it was only a description.

  “How’s Jake and the kids? Four now?” Missey kept Jake around by getting pregnant. In the beginning, she knew he wouldn’t leave her if she was carrying his child, but now she knew he wouldn’t leave because he couldn’t afford child support or alimony.

  She nodded. “Yep, Nick would love it. Rugrats running around everywhere.”

  Jesse balled his fist. If one of the men had made that comment, he would’ve decked him right there. Missey always knew how to push people’s buttons.

  “Speaking of which, I hear you’re a dad these days. I would’ve never pictured you as the fatherly type. With all the women in your life, different one every night, right?” Her voice was sweet, but only nastiness poured out her mouth.

  “I’ve laid off the women. Nicky’s a great kid.” He saw Katy across the room at the same time Missey did.

  “So you’ve inherited Garrity’s life...his house, his kid...his wife?” She raised an eyebrow with a sneer on her face.

  Jesse started to panic, but he knew there was no way she’d seen them kiss. He wanted to be honest with the guys in his crew, not Missey Keefe. He knew he had to keep Missey away from Katy. Last time the two interacted, there’d damn near been a catfight.

  Missey laughed as she saw his reaction and pinched his chin. “It’s written all over your face, O’Neil.”

  Jesse glared at Missey. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  She let go of his chin. “Don’t pretend with me. I’ve known you a long time, probably know more about you than you realize.” She winked. “You’ve always wanted what Nick had and look, now you have it. Guess someone benefitted from him being gone?”

  Jesse watched her slink away, his stomach sinking. She’d figured out about him and Katy, but did she know his other secret? Nick was the only one he’d confided in and he was beginning to wonder if Nick was as good a friend as he thought he was.

  ***

  Shortly after Murph began his rant on the men of Ladder 28, Abby had disappeared. Katy found her in the bathroom. Her sister-in-law was reapplying lipstick in the gold framed mirror that hung above the table holding fresh daylilies. Katy stood beside her, hands on her hips.

  “Where have you been?”

  Abby smirked. “Busy.”

  Katy’s jaw dropped. “Do you mean what I think you mean?”

  Abby shrugged and Katy noticed the back of her dress.

  She stepped behind Abby and zipped it up, looking over her shoulder into the mirror.

  “Details, I want details.”

  Abby spun around and leaned against the sink. “I’ll give you d
etails, if you give me some.” She raised her eyebrows almost taunting Katy.

  “Fine, fine, no details, but...was it good?”

  Abby grinned. “Amazing!”

  The girls giggled like high schoolers at prom. Abby turned back around to finish her lipstick. Katy fluffed Abby’s hair and rested her head on her shoulder.

  “I’m glad you joined us tonight.”

  Abby gave Katy a soft smile in the mirror and patted her cheek. “Me too. It’s been almost fourteen years, it’s time I move on.”

  Katy looked down, feeling guilty that she’d barely made it a year. Abby spoke quietly, “It’s okay for you to move on, too. It doesn’t mean we love them any less.”

  Katy smiled and kissed her cheek. “You riding home with us or getting a ride from your secret rendezvous?”

  Abby grinned. “Don’t wait for me...and take the girls breakfast when you pick up Nicky.”

  ***

  Jesse made his way to Katy with her drink. He’d left his at the bar after his conversation with Missey. Katy leaned up to kiss him when he handed it to her, but he dodged her lips and refused to look her in the eye. Katy scrunched up her face and narrowed her eyebrows inquisitively, but he pretended not to notice.

  “Are you about ready to go?” he asked.

  Katy smiled. “Depends on what you have in mind.”

  Jesse shrugged. “The guys are going out for a drink and I wanted to join them. I can drop you off at home and I’ll probably crash at Murph’s.”

  Katy frowned and Jesse saw a mixture of disappointment and hurt cross her face.

  “Abby got a ride home so I’ll just take my car and you can catch a ride with someone,” Katy said quickly and stood up. She put her drink down without touching it and picked up her purse. She headed toward the door, not even acknowledging him. Jesse watched this gorgeous woman, the woman he had called his, run away from him. He stood there, not moving, not running after her.

  Missey had struck a nerve. His mind raced as he tried to figure out if he really loved Katy or just wanted Nick’s life. They’d been best friends since they were in diapers, but Nick always seemed to one-up him. Jesse was an only child. Nick had Ryan, a protective, older brother; the two were inseparable. Nick was the quarterback while Jesse was the running back who scored, but only because of Nick’s passes. Nick had the fastest course record for their fitness test in the fire academy and the first rescue of their proby class. Now that Nick was gone, Jesse was finally the man on top.