No Wasted Tears

by Sylvia D. Carter

  Forty-five minutes later, Cynthia eased her car through the gate to the semi-circular drive of the Mason mansion. She remembered all of the times she’d driven through these gates. However, the last time was seven years ago when she left to go to college. It was a marvelous house—four-stories with an apartment on the upper level, bedrooms on the third level, entertainment on the first, and a huge cellar with a recreational area. Outside was all red brick and stucco in the front with a beautiful stone deck on the east side. The front lawn was decorated with an elaborate marble fountain on the left side of the cobble stone walk and a beautiful craved teak bench on the right, underneath the tall oak tree. This grand estate was once a place she never thought she’d leave. But things change and so do people.

  Cynthia sat in the car nervously, twisting her fingers in her lap and gazing up at the house she had lived in most of her life. She had always loved everything about the house, especially her window seat, which looked out over the lake in the back. It was her place to read, think, or dream about her future. She couldn’t believe she was actually back at home, vowing never to come here again once her parents began badgering her to break things off with Marvin and focus on a more suitable young man. She had gone through a lot in this place and with its residents, and now she was actually back.

  Her legs were actually wobbling as she stepped out of the car to scan the surroundings she knew so well.

  The tension she was feeling gave way to excitement as she watched Miss Betty swing the doors to the mansion open. She relaxed when she realized she didn’t have to see her parents just yet. Betty always walked in heels; she still looked fit, no older than when Cynthia last saw her. Walking briskly down the steps to the car, her face was filled with excitement.

  With arms outstretched, Miss Betty welcomed her back home. Cynthia went into them, closing her eyes and hugging her tightly.

  “Cynthia! How have you been? Lord knows I missed my baby.” Betty smiled, pulling back and exposing the sheen of tears glistening in her eyes.

  “Miss Betty, I wanted to call, but I was afraid you’d tell Mom and Dad where I was. I didn’t want to put you in that position.” Tears were threatening to fall as she looked at the woman who cared for her like a mother most of her life.

  Peering over Cynthia’s shoulders, Betty spied the twins, who were looking just a little apprehensive about the scene that was unfolding.

  “I see that congratulations are in order, although it seems to be…what, six years too late? Who do we have here?” Betty walked over to car, opening the door and peering in on the boys.

  “You’re right. They are six, Miss Betty,” Cynthia interjected as she attempted to smooth over the awkwardness of the moment. She glanced at the boys who were smiling and shyly giving Betty a return hug.

  “Jonathan, David, I’d like you both to meet Miss Betty. She was my nanny, sort of like what Miss Sara is to both of you.”

  They smiled. “It’s nice to meet you, Miss Betty.” Their eyes were curious as they looked at Betty.

  “You both are cute as can be, I see you both look a little like your mom. So which of you is Jonathan?” She was gazing between the both of them after hearing their mother say their names.

  Raising his hand reluctantly, Jonathan said, “I am, and I’m the oldest.” He giggled, looking at Betty.

  “So you must be David?” She looked behind Jonathan to gaze into the face of the second twin.

  “Yes, ma’am. Do you live in that big ole house too?”

  Betty smiled. “Yes, I do, but my house is out back. I’ll show it to the both of you later.”

  “Can we go inside? Momma said our grandparents are in there,” David said, pointing in the direction of the house.

  It appeared to Cynthia that the twins had no issues about meeting their grandparents as they took Betty’s hands and started for the house. Their eyes and smiles were identical as they walked toward the entrance. It pleased her that they felt a connection with Miss Betty. Cynthia sighed with relief. Could they really become a family again? She hoped so; she knew she’d like nothing better. She didn’t know how her parents would react at seeing her again along with her sons.

  A few minutes later, Miss Betty ushered Cynthia and the twins into the entrance hall. Edward and Gwendolyn Mason came out of the living room to greet their daughter and their grandsons. Cynthia saw tears shimmering in her mother’s eyes when they settled on the twins.

  The twins ventured forward curiously. “Are you really our grandmother?” Jonathan asked her.

  “Are you really our grandfather?” David asked Edward.

  Gwendolyn went to Jonathan while Edward walked over to David. The eyes of both Miss Betty and Cynthia were riveted on them. Neither of them spoke a word.

  “Yes, I am. ” Gwendolyn spoke first, leaning down to look directly in Jonathan’s eyes. “What’s your name?”

  “Jonathan William Wheeler.” After saying his name, he proudly looked at both of his grandparents, smiling from ear to ear.

  “And what’s your name, young man?” Edward asked David.

  “I’m David William Wheeler, sir.” David looked at his grandfather with unrehearsed pride.

  “How old are you, young men?”

  “We turned six on our birthday,” David answered.

  “It was March the twenty-sixth,” Jonathan interrupted to say.

  Gwendolyn held out her arms to her only grandchildren. They both went into them without hesitation. Tears stung Cynthia’s eyes when she realized how much having a family meant to her children.

  Standing to his full height, Cynthia watched her father turn to her. With questioning eyes as if asking if it would be okay to speak, he went to his only child. For all the wrong he had done to his family by his treacherous ways, they could now only be righted by asking his only daughter, his only child, to forgive him. Now, as he watched her eyes grow huge, the silence of awareness fell over her. If he had his way, he would never have allowed the past to disrupt the future, but in order to get their family back, he had to admit he had been wrong all of those years ago.

  His wife had cried herself to sleep many nights worrying about their child. That’s why he arranged for her to have that home in Charleston without paying rent. What good was it being Edward Mason if you couldn’t pull strings or call in favors every now and then? He made sure she never had to pay tuition. He’d arranged for her to receive special scholarships from the university. Yes, she was away from home, but they knew everything about her and the boys.

  “Cynthia, how have you been?” her father asked. His voice was crisp, but there was no animosity. He wasn’t being unkind.

  “Fine, Father, and you?” she asked after clearing her voice, looking between her mother and father.

  “Fine. A lot has changed since you left home. I’ve had a lot of time to deal with all of the demons that have tormented me since your departure. The hurt and pain I caused in all of our lives has eaten this old man up,” he said, using his hand to pat his chest and emphasizing his point before continuing. “My selfishness and foolish pride almost cost me my entire family. I had to learn that forgiveness is a powerful weapon. It can be used for good or bad. I’m just blessed that I now understand what it truly means to walk in forgiveness.”

  Edward Mason looked at his only daughter. She was beautiful, and God had kept her in spite of all the anguish she had to endure because of his pride. How she even had the courage to come here today was a testimony of the woman she had become. She was a better person than him. But she had always been special. He knew his daughter was a survivor. It was in her genes.

  “Let’s have a seat.” Edward directed his daughter to the seats arranged near the spiral staircase. They all sat, except for the boys, who were following Betty to the kitchen for cookies that she said were made especially for them. Before allowing Cynthia to take her seat, Edward stepped closer to her, reaching out to touch his daughter’s cheek.

  “I’m sorry, Cynthia. You didn’t deserve wh
at I did to you.”

  Edward pulled back, almost flinching as if he felt a shock ripple through his body. His eyes dropped in disapproval of his actions.

  “I should have never assumed that I was God in your life. Justifying my actions because I was the man who once held your hand as you took your first steps, watched you as you walked into womanhood and then straight into the arms of a young man you constantly talked about loving. I had plans for your life—big plans—and it was hard to see you give all of that up.”

  Her father’s eyes were shimmering with tears that refused to fall. “In reality, I was just a father who acted in ignorance, thinking he was God by interfering in your life even where Marvin was concerned. Sometimes as fathers, we forget the special role we have in our children’s lives. Our pastor taught us about being a blueprint for our daughters.”

  Cynthia was surprised that her father even mentioned Marvin. The questioning of what he meant when referring to a blueprint must have been expressed in her eyes because her father continued as if the mentioning of Marvin’s name was an everyday occurrence.

  “He said as fathers, we embody our daughters’ first blueprint of what it is to be a man, to be a husband, and to be a father. We do this both consciously and unconsciously because our daughters, just like you, Cynthia, generally base some of their choices of men they have relationships with on their observations of their fathers.”

  Cynthia was looking at her father through new eyes. Who was this man and where was the Edward Mason she knew? She looked at her mother for some sort of indication of what was happening. Gwendolyn just smiled and whispered, “Listen,” low enough for her ears only.

  “As you got older, it was my responsibility to help you separate from this blueprint and initiate the process of becoming a young woman who could make wise decisions on her own. My main task was to help you let go of the daddy image that I kept wanting you to see and gain your own sense of what you wanted in a relationship.”

  Now looking at Cynthia and his wife, Edward shook his head slowly with regret.

  “But sadly, looking back on that time, I thought a person’s worth was based on where they lived or what they did for a living. I didn’t understand God’s favor then as much as I do now. Marvin was a good man. If he weren’t, then you never would have been with him. I now know that, even though it may be too late.”

  Edward reached back and pulled Gwendolyn, who was standing slightly behind his chair, to his side.

  “I loved you, Cynthia. From the day your mother said she was pregnant, I loved you. It didn’t matter that we never had another child or that I didn’t have a son. You were all we”—he pointed to himself and Gwendolyn—“ever needed.” The love he felt for her in his heart showed through the look in his eyes.

  “David and Jonathan!” He called their names loud enough for them to come scurrying back into the vestibule. He glanced at his wife and daughter. Then he inched forward, kneeling in front of his grandsons.

  “I’m your grandfather. My name is Edward Mason. It’s my pleasure to meet my two extraordinary grandsons.” He looked at his daughter, smiling proudly while opening his arms for his grandsons.

  Cynthia smiled. She could tell that her parents were hooked on their grandchildren already. Her sons had a way with people that could wrap them around their hearts at first sight. They were good boys. She watched as her parents along with the boys turned to go into the living room, and then she looked nervously at Betty, who was signaling for her to follow them.

  “Go ahead, sweetheart. They love you, and they have missed you terribly.” She turned in the direction of the kitchen before gently ushering her in their direction. The tears that had been threatening were finally falling.

  As she entered the living room, she smiled when she saw the interaction between her mother and the twins.

  “Your hair is beautiful, Cynthia,” her mother said. The look on her face was sincere as she rose from her seat to approach her daughter. She looked from her head down to her feet. It caused Cynthia’s heart to break, and the tears would not stop.

  “I didn’t mean to make you cry, but I missed you so much. Sweetheart, you look wonderful,” she said, watching her through tears. “Can you find it in your heart to forgive your father and me?”

  It felt strange to hear her mother ask that question. She had wanted to hear those words for years. Here they were and she didn’t know what to say.

  “I forgave you both a long time ago,” she said. Her voice felt small in the room filled with the five of them. She was nervous. Secretly she had always wanted them to love her boys and to accept her. She couldn’t remember ever having a test that seemed so hard and she didn’t want to fail this one.

  “Thank you.” Her mother looked surprised when Cynthia wrapped her arms around her, wanting to remember nothing but the happy times of her childhood, blocking out all of the negative thoughts that the enemy had been trying to plant in her mind. It was easier now because she’d learned to cast down every evil imagination that tried to exalt itself against the knowledge of her God.

  “Welcome home, Cynthia.” Her father took her in his arms, holding her so delicately as if she would break if he squeezed too hard. He pulled back to look at her, trying to remember every detail of his daughter and mother of his grandchildren.

  “I’m sorry, Cynthia. I let so many things get in the way of my love for you, and because of that, I had to watch you grow into a beautiful woman and mother from a distance.” Her parents looked at each other.

  “You were never really alone, Cynthia. You didn’t know it, but your father and I have been your secret angels for all of these years.” Her mother sat in the chair and trembled slightly from nervous energy. Reaching out, she pulled both of the twins down with her.

  It was Cynthia’s turn to be surprised. She turned her head to look at her father. There were times when she had her suspicions about some of the favor she received. How could she have forgotten that her parents had a wealth of resources around them? Cynthia’s eyes danced at this, but when she looked at her mother’s face, she had no misgivings. She knew all of the coincidences couldn’t have been accidental; and they had been arranged by her parents.

  Her mother spoke first after that revelation. “I’m proud of you, Cynthia. We regretted our decision the moment we hung up the phone. I wanted my daughter back home with me. But we foolishly thought it would ruin our reputation. The firm had just begun to gain national attention. We were winning more cases…but everything changed after that phone call. I cried myself to sleep every night until your father made the decision that, without you, our lives were empty.” Gwendolyn looked at the twins.

  “What your mother is trying to say is that she demanded I do something.” They both nodded with appreciative smiles.

  Cynthia smiled gratefully at her parents.

  “Thank you for sharing all of this with me because I realize you didn’t have to,” Cynthia said with a welcoming lift to her voice. She realized how difficult it must have been for her mother to defend her at the cost of her father’s success. The decision had been made, and now they all had to move forward, hopefully for the better. They would, as long as God ordered all of their steps. She looked at both them, her eyes taking in every detail. With the smiles she received from each of them, she no longer felt the tense air that had been in the room when she entered it. Now, it had slices cut in it that allowed a flowing breeze to pass through.

  “Mother,” Cynthia went to her mother, hugging her, “I do love you both.”

  “I know. We both know.” Gwendolyn hugged Cynthia back.

  Edward joined them, whispering, “But it’s good to hear you say it.”

  “Now we want to know everything about you and the boys,” her mother stated.

  “Why don’t we go in and eat first?” Her father was by her side, and she hadn’t seen him move. Cynthia was so relieved. Without knowing she was doing it, she reached out to grab her father’s hand. The twins were holding thei
r grandmother’s hands, both talking at once, telling her about their school.

  They moved to the dining room where Cynthia was sure their interrogation would continue. She suspected her mother was holding back on asking about Marvin, but she was sure it would come up when dinner was over. The dinner was served family style. Miss Betty brought all of the bowls, platters, and servers to the table. Bowls were passed around the table, and each person served themselves. Miss Betty assisted the twins. The smells about the room caused her stomach to rumble.

  Betty had cooked steaks that were thick, tender, and juicy. A variety of vegetables shared spaces in beautifully crafted antique china, creating a colorful palate against the beautiful embroidered tablecloth.

  The twins were actively talking about their lives and telling stories from school. Laughter seemed to be the word of the day. Finally, the meal came to an end. Her parents got around to questioning her.

  “So, Cynthia, what are your plans?” her father repeated the question asked by her mother earlier.

  Cynthia had relaxed, but with the question, she knew she was center stage. “Dad, why don’t you and Mom tell me what you know so I can fill in the parts you don’t know,” she responded, waiting for either of them to say something.

  Her father shrugged. “Fair,” he said, folding his hand on the table. “According to what we’ve gathered…”

  She looked at her mother. Her face was unreadable, but she knew it was her father who had this information given to him. He’d had her investigated and had not told her.

  “You came to back to Charleston and lived next door to a woman by the name of Sara, who you currently live with, as well as her niece, Destiny.” Her father was laying out her life. It sounded strange to have it related so concisely, as if she were a prisoner about to be sentenced.