A Certain Intimacy

by Blythe Stone

  For Natalie, the morning was a sad one. Waking up without her ex in her bed was enough to make her want to slink out onto her roof, drag her bare feet along the decking, and drop her naked body right into the deep end of the pool.

  Some days were worse than others. This was definitely one of the bad ones.

  “Natalia?”

  “What?” They’d been working a scene with some complex dialogue. Her scene partner was a nice guy she actually appreciated and liked. Of course, he was handsome. They needed someone rugged yet plain.

  “You okay?” Michael asked her, concerned.

  “I said, are you ready?” The director’s voice boomed through a loudspeaker. He was always hooked up to some high-tech microphone which made his voice present in this disturbing omnipotent fashion that could only be likened to the all-encompassing voice of a God.

  “Um. Yeah. Yeah,” Nat nodded, awake. “Sorry. I'm good.”

  She shook it off. Every time Brian stopped filming to talk to someone, or, in this instance, give her costar some long-winded instructions, Natalie went away somewhere else. A different place.

  Memories and fantasies seemed to make up her mind. Too much time alone left her a lot of space to ruminate and daydream.

  The melancholy, from losing Olivia for another handful of days, it weighed down on Natalie heavily like a thick winter coat.

  Her lines were memorized. Her acting was superb. But what did it all really matter? What could matter?

  Natalie daydreamed. And in her daydreams, all she could do was long for Olivia.

  Michael, Natalie's first co-star on scene, had a steel gaze, a hard jaw, and these beautiful almost pink lips. As he spoke, she stared down at them. “Well, my partner is coming any second now. I'll let you tell her.”

  That line was the cue for Iris to enter. In this world, Iris was playing a government agent very similar to a high-stakes cop. Long hours, and a conviction that very few could accomplish, Iris had to embody the look of someone world-wary.

  Since this was a fictitious and futuristic world, it was extra pleasing for Natalie to set eyes on the more stable and relatable character that Iris was getting to play. Even with the feminine pant suit, Iris was absolutely stunning. No clothes could dull her intense beauty. And her body was different from Natalie’s, her frame was thin and her muscles didn’t present themselves, at least, not that Natalie had seen. If anything, Iris looked like one of the actresses from Natalie’s favorite telenovela. Where Nat could nail the pin-up look with her strong thighs and attractive curves, Iris could silence a room upon entry, all eyes drawn to take note of the most beautiful woman there.

  As Iris approached, Natalie realized she’d been holding her breath. It was her line now. She was supposed to speak once Iris hit the three foot mark but Nat had missed it.

  “CUT! Come on Natalie! Where are you?! We need you here!” The wrath of god paraded down on top of her.

  “Sorry,” Nat sighed, a little jarred by the sudden loud voice again. Apologetically, she looked across the active set space at Iris who was now somehow even more beautiful. Her expression actually reminded Nat of Olivia.

  A pang struck Natalie’s stomach and she held onto it to try and ward off the incoming rush of unwanted thoughts. No, Nat thought. You can’t start falling for a stranger again.

  It was far too easy to distract herself with candy. How many hookups had there been? And some seemed so genuine. But no, they always failed. Something always fell short. The thing Nat didn’t have with Iris? That was what made Olivia so special, she’d never been a stranger. Any heated hookup would almost always depart once things grew familiar. A multi-talent like Iris? Her life must be ruled by the projects she takes. You don’t even know anything about her, Nat thought. Just don’t.

  But the feeling was there. And maybe it was there because it was part of her role, to fall in love.

  Iris was beautiful and she was a musician. She was smaller than Nat and she made expressions that Olivia would make. It was enough to churn the sparks and ashes in Nat’s resting pit of a stomach and incite her to want.

  Iris looked back at Nat and smiled. Then she turned to go back and make her entrance again.

  The smile cracked through Nat’s resolve. Resisting the urge to get close to this girl was going to eat her up.

  “Alright. ACTION!”

  The scene started again. Predictable as clockwork, Iris walked in and hit her mark.

  As the scene took off, Natalie found that she wasn't so distracted anymore by her thoughts of missing Olivia. For the first time in a long time she was fully present and the cameras could see.

  “Why should I help you? You haven’t exactly earned my trust,” her voice did it’s dark dance, becoming the sounds of a hard person for the moment at hand.

  Her co-stars gave each other withering stares. The shared guilt of a failing agency; in a lot of ways, they were powerless.

  “You’re right,” Iris said, sticking her chin out to get Nat to stay. “We can’t promise you protection. Though, I’d very much like to.”

  Iris’s voice was softer and yet it commanded more attention. Natalie gazed into her magnetic eyes and felt the distinct urge to immorally defy all the rules she’d been aching to keep for herself.

  “I can give you a little but not here,” Nat said, looking around as if there were spies everywhere. She touched a hand to Iris’s elbow and felt a subtle rush of attraction, that age-old dangerous thing. They exchanged another look. Nat looked up, then at Michael, an apologetic smile mixed well with her well-played determination. She led them all off to stage right. Since the studio was immense, and open, stepping toward stage right was the equivalent of speed walking with true purpose for a few generous paces and then stopping short once the facade of the extra flooring swiftly faded to cold hard grey.

  Smooth concrete lay beneath their feet. All around them were chairs and equipment, stands, and crew.

  This was a normal day for Natalie.

  “That went pretty well, right?” Iris asked.

  Nat was still holding Iris's form. Hands softly touching at her clothing. When she noticed, Nat tried not to act weird by pulling away. “I think so,” she smiled.

  “Good, I think I needed that,” Iris said. Then Iris stepped back and looked away, seeing everything around her. Nat watched how the girl held her own arms. The behavior was familiar and uncanny but this wasn't Olivia. A fact that only heightened Nat's senses and made her small hairs stand up.

  “Alright we're gonna break for now,” the voice of god returned. “Take ten.” Nat knew this director, he was going to watch the scene over and over and try to nitpick, which was fine.

  Nat hugged an arm across her stomach and smiled softly at Michael. “You're great for the role,” she said.

  “Oh, me? Are you kidding? You're perfect. I um. I only got my scenes but I'd love to read yours.”

  “Oh of course,” Nat said. “You should come over sometime after work.”

  “Really? I'd love that,” Michael said, blushing a little and rubbing the back of his head with his fingers.

  This sort of thing was just natural to Nat. She could tell Michael was really interested in the project and that kind of relationship was crazy helpful at a time like this. The more invested they all were the better the scenes would be.

  Plus, if they had a little too much fun and things traveled into a different direction nothing bad could come of sleeping with Michael. It wouldn't mess with Nat’s head or drive a hot spike into the deep bleeding wound in her soul. Iris, on the other hand…

  Iris focused on them again and stepped a little closer. “Are you guys talking about running lines?”

  “More like, actually reading the full script,” Michael laughed. “But yeah,” he nodded, encouragingly. “Aren't you curious about the rest of the script?”

  “I’ve read it. It’s all up here,” Iris said, tapping her temple.

  “They gave you the whole thing?” Michael asked. “God they nev
er do that with me. Maybe my agent tells them not to.”

  “Nah, it’s normal,” Nat soothed. “The less we all know, the less we can spoil during the press circuit.” Nat looked to Iris curiously but then she quickly looked away.

  It was terrible, the need to look and look and look. When Nat found someone attractive she couldn’t stop it. Her attraction ran like a wild river, fully formed and hardly contained.

  “I've had projects where they only gave me three pages,” Nat confessed, in an attempt to distract herself. “Just show up, act one scene.” She looked between the two of them. “Still not the worst job I've had,” she laughed. “Um. I'm gonna get a drink, either of you want?” Her eyes shifted toward the craft service setup.

  Iris tried to smile but it came out as a frown. “Maybe my manager insisted,” she said.

  “Hm?” Nat asked, confused. “Oh, the script? Yeah. It can be in your contract,” she soothed. “Michael, you want?”

  “I'm good,” he nodded. “Thank you.”

  “I'll be right back,” Nat said, touching Iris's shoulder before walking away. She wanted to get some water and possibly try to pee in case the next scene ran long. If she stood herself next to Iris any longer she'd start to flirt with her and that wouldn't end well.

  Chapter 5

  A Bit of a Chase

  They got through the day’s scenes pretty quickly, which was a blessing since it was her first day. Iris wanted to hang out by herself and process everything. She couldn’t quantify the amount of feelings she had at the moment. There were too many people, too much confusion.

  Natalie was so sweet and personable. Iris didn’t have much of an impression of anyone else, even Michael. He was nice enough but Natalie stood out. Iris didn’t latch onto people that easily. Perhaps, it was because Stan wasn’t here. It wasn’t that, she knew. She was attracted to Natalie instantly. Admitting it didn’t mean she would do anything about it.

  She stood at the edge of the set while the director gave a little speech about how well everyone did and how excited he was about the production. Natalie stood close to her, looking perfect and delicious.

  The director dismissed them. Iris turned to Natalie. “That was way more fun than I was expecting, a good day overall,” Iris mentioned.

  “Great day,” Nat smiled and stared, her eyes wandered a little, taking her in. “What are you gonna do now? Big plans?”

  Unconsciously, Nat fluffed her hair with her hand. It was probably a nervous habit, also a thing that would get her to stop staring so hard.

  “No plans. I guess I’ll get some dinner somewhere and get ready for tomorrow. You?” Iris replied.

  “Yeah,” Nat huffed a laugh. “Me too. I'm all alone out here.”

  “You too, huh? Well, technically I have Jenny but she’s staying somewhere else. Where are you staying?” Iris asked.

  “Uh. It's not close, actually. I requested a place in the city. My driver takes me. It's about a half hour away.”

  Nat looked a little tired now. Iris could see the distance in her.

  “Well, anyway,” Nat said, a little sad. “It was great to meet you today. I better…” Her voice trailed off as she gazed at Iris openly. She gazed so long that her mind completely repositioned itself. “Have a good night Iris.”

  “Hey, would you want to maybe have dinner?” Iris asked. It wasn’t something she thought about saying beforehand. It just came out. She didn’t want the interaction to end, more than she wanted to go back to her room and decompress.

  Nat’s smile spread. “I'd actually love that.”

  “Do you know a good place?” Iris asked. “I’ve never been here before but if all else fails we can go back to my hotel room and order room service.”

  “We can do that,” Nat said. “Or there's an excellent Mexican place close by. Come on, let's change,” Nat motioned. “My driver can take us.”

  “That sounds good,” Iris said.

  After they changed, leaving their wardrobe behind for cleaning, Iris followed Natalie out to where the car and her driver were waiting and she got in after her. While the instructions were being imparted to the driver, Iris texted Jenny to tell her what was going on and to say goodbye for the night. She put her phone down after and glanced out the window at the passing scenery.

  “I like these clothes,” Nat smiled, tugging on the sleeve of Iris's t-shirt.

  Nat wore a tight red dress with a short black jacket. Beside her, Iris wore skinny black jeans and a loose worn shirt with boots.

  “Thanks, it’s just comfortable clothes, you know? I like your dress,” Iris said. Looking at Natalie’s body made her feel a little warm. She cleared her throat and tried not to let her discomfort show. “And your jacket is cute as well,” Iris finished with.

  “Thanks,” Nat said. She smiled softly and wondered what she should say. When Iris invited her out Nat was actually surprised.

  “Um, so where are you from?” Iris asked. Small talk seemed better than silence.

  “California. Small green town kind of close to Carmel. How about you?”

  “Originally, Nashville but I'm never at home. I don't really have a place anymore besides my parent's. When I'm in L.A. I stay with my manager. He has a guesthouse,” she replied.

  “Are you close?” Nat was interested in knowing much more.

  “He's like my big brother. My family has known him for a long time and he's considered family actually,” Iris explained.

  “I'm glad you have someone to trust like that. It's priceless.”

  Nat didn't like to think on all the bad management she had. Things were good for her now but she burned through several shady characters who used her up and put her in harm's way long before she could find safety.

  “I got lucky,” Iris said. “I've witnessed the opposite happen to a friend back home.”

  That friend gave up on her dream of becoming a recording artist and Iris knew how much that stung. She was glad that it wasn't her fate.

  “It's hard to trust,” Iris said.

  “Or maybe too easy,” Nat smiled.

  “You’ll have to let me know how that is. I haven’t really experienced it,” Iris said.

  Paranoid was probably the better word but she didn’t want to say that.

  “Uh, well, it’s pretty terrible,” Nat burst into laughter. “I don’t think I was ever a naive person, but still, you want the people who speak for you and who work with you to actually want good things and to not use you. I’m lucky I learned fast, that’s all I can really say. I didn’t have my family in my corner.”

  “That’s terrible,” Iris expressed. “It’s the business, I guess, but I don’t feel like we should have to put up with that being the norm. I am very lucky. My parents grew up in music and knew the life. They were connected. I can’t imagine coming into entertainment without that kind of support. You’ve done amazing, obviously.”

  “What kind of music?”

  “Country. I grew up going to their gigs until my dad became a producer and my mom a songwriter. They still do a show or two just for nostalgia.”

  “Wow,” Nat said, taking another look at her new backseat friend. “That’s surprising. I love that. Is your music country too?” To Nat, Iris seemed more like the indie goth type. To hear country was cute.

  “Is it? Nashville is full of good country music, and a lot of not so good country music. It’s what I grew up on but our band is definitely not country. I don’t know what genre to put it in. People say different things. To us, it’s just the music we make. If I had to put words to it, I’d say electro indie pop,” Iris answered.

  “Well, we’re not in Nashville,” Natalie reminded. “And I didn't imagine. But I love that. I mean, that you come from that. It's really sweet.”

  The car stopped in a parking spot. “Guess we’re here,” Nat said. They shared a look and got out.

  Hacienda style dining. They walked inside and were seated near the bar. People milled about and the vibe was low lighting and romanti
c soft music. Nat pulled her jacket off and draped it around the head of her chair. “I love this place,” she shared. Iris was even prettier across a table. “Do you drink? We can move if you hate it.”

  They’d sat in the bar section since Natalie liked the intimacy of the wall-like divide and the small two-chair tables. The rest of the space was made for bigger parties.

  “It looks nice,” Iris commented.

  She took it all in but her eyes came back to Nat after a moment. They seemed to always do that. She had a straightforward gaze without giving anything away. Her clear, golden eyes seemed too light and luminous to be real in this light.

  They were given menus. Iris tore her eyes away to find something she could stomach. She was too nervous to eat anything much, maybe just a salad or a few tacos. The server brought them water and she looked up, pausing to order a drink.

  “Whiskey neat,” she said.

  “Of course, anything for you ma’am?” He asked Nat.

  “Uh,” she hesitated a moment, staring over at all the bottles that lined the impressive mirror wall. “Do you still serve the El Camino 89?”

  “Of course,” the waiter laughed. “He'll have it out in a second.”

  “Thanks,” they both said. “Whiskey,” Nat smiled softly once the man had wandered away. “Trying to take my heart?” Nat teased. “I used to like that in the guys I dated,” she paused. “Tastes a lot better though when it's a girl.”

  Sometimes Olivia drank whiskey when she wanted to get loose and have a lot of sex. Nat rubbed her neck a little, caught up in remembering. “Is it hot in here?” She asked, a little pained by her loss and completely serious. Her nerves were creating the warmth. The restaurant was a cool 70.

  “It’s the only thing I drink unless it’s a special occasion. Stan got me hooked when I turned 21. Funny, I didn’t ever drink before that and I could have easily. No one in those clubs cared, especially when we were on tour,” Iris explained.

  Nat was melting her reserve by being utterly sexy and flirty. Iris couldn’t tell if it was for real yet though. She didn’t want to show her hand.