Phi Alpha Pi

by Sara Marks

  Wil had turned in his seat as much as he could.

  “Everything has changed since Thanksgiving,” Lizbeth said.

  They sat there staring into each other’s eyes.

  “I lied,” Wil whispered. “I did it all for you. I did it all because I love you. Not... not so you would feel obligated, but because I love you. Every moment I’m with you I know you are the only...”

  Lizbeth didn’t let him finish. She was tired of words and she only knew one way to tell him how she felt. She leaned over the parking brake, put her hand on his cheek, and kissed Wil Darcy.

  ***

  Lizbeth woke up alone in Wil’s bed the next morning. The room was just as bare as it had been the last time she had been in it. That time she had merely sat on the bed, now she had spent the night in it. She heard the water running in Wil’s bathroom before the door opened.

  “Good morning,” Wil said with a smile.

  Lizbeth smiled and stretched. After months in a twin bed with a crappy mattress, she was enjoying the soft, luxurious, full-size bed in Wil’s room. The company wasn’t too bad either. Wil got back into the bed and kissed her as he wrapped his arms around her. She let her body settle into his. He chuckled and moved his hand down her side.

  “I DON’T WANT ALL THESE PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE!” Caroline yelled as she passed Wil’s room and stomped down the stairs.

  “Shhh,” Wil whispered in Lizbeth’s ear. “Just let her have a tantrum. If she doesn’t get a reaction from us, she will pout somewhere else.”

  “Has she been like this all semester?”

  “Mostly after spring break, but it started when we got back for the spring semester.”

  “No wonder you went elsewhere so often.”

  ***

  There had been no comfortable position in Wil’s car the night before. Wil held on to Lizbeth’s hand as he drove back to his townhouse. He didn’t ask about the sorority house. There was no way they could go there. Not only were no guys allowed in the bedrooms, but they wouldn’t have any peace in the house. They didn’t discuss who would be at the townhouse. Lizbeth didn’t think about it until they were inside, kissing, hands everywhere, and then she heard Charlie.

  “Hi, guys!”

  Lizbeth and Wil broke apart before turning to see Charlie, Jane, and Caroline in the front room watching television. Jane and Charlie were comfortably sitting on the couch, cuddling with each other. Caroline, on the other hand, sat alone in an armchair with a look of disgust on her face and her fingers clenching the arms of the chair.

  “Hi, we are...” Wil started.

  “We’re going to get out of here,” Lizbeth said and let Wil lead her to his room.

  ***

  Lizbeth didn’t want to get out of the bed. She wanted to lie in Wil’s arms and listen to him chuckle at her stupid jokes. The deep tenor of his laugh was almost perfect. She wanted to feel the stubble of his beard on her cheek before he shaved. She wanted to keep running her fingers through his hair. He had not cut it since winter break and the loose curls were back. She loved getting to do so many of the things she had been fantasizing about for the last few months.

  “I think I fell in love with you the moment I met you,” Lizbeth said as they lay in each other’s arms.

  “I thought you hated me the moment you met me?”

  “No, I was angry at the rejection.”

  Wil kissed her again and then suddenly pulled away.

  “When did you start acknowledging your feelings?”

  “Probably after we went to the Met together.”

  “I wanted to kiss you so much that day.”

  “I probably would have let you.”

  “This could have happened in January?”

  “Yep.”

  “Caroline ruined it, didn’t she?”

  “Yep.”

  “I was crushed the moment she arrived. It would’ve been fine if it had just been Charlie, but with her... I watched you go from smile to scowl.”

  “I don’t scowl.”

  “You spent most of the fall semester scowling at me,” Wil said.

  “No, you did.”

  Wil kissed her neck.

  “Just don’t scowl at me again, please,” Wil whispered into her ear.

  May

  The semester seemed to end quickly once it was May. The sorority house would remain open over the summer for the sisters who were staying on campus for classes. The sisters who were moving out spent their time packing, studying, and writing papers. The main part of the house was full as study groups spread into any space they could find. Sisters working in the study room spread their books, notebooks, and articles all over. The cleaning crews did their best to clean around the piles of paper. There was at least one meltdown a night when someone inevitably did something stupid like forget to save her file before a computer crashed, accidentally threw away an article she needed for her research paper, or lost notecards with important facts on them. Lizbeth spent as much time helping her sorority sisters manage their anxiety as she did working on her own projects. With the thesis done, Lizbeth quickly wrote her few remaining papers and spent a lot of time packing to move out. She passed on T-shirts and sorority paraphernalia to younger sisters. She often found small graduation gifts left on her bed. Marie got her a sorority paddle. The wood was painted hot pink and Phi Alpha Pi, in both English letters and Greek symbols, were painted in black and light pink. Lizbeth didn’t pack it until the very last moment.

  The biggest event for the sorority, in May, was the annual election. Marie was elected the new president and Kitty was elected membership vice president. The two had worked amazingly well together during the spring. Lizbeth and Jane helped them move into their new roles. Lizbeth was so happy with the way Marie took to being president that she let the younger woman take the reins right away. Kitty kept Marie from being too controlling and brought a little levity to the mix. Lizbeth was confident she had left the sorority in good hands.

  “Can I ask you something?” Lizbeth asked Marie one evening after elections.

  “Sure.”

  “Why did you get so drunk at the Halloween party?”

  Marie rolled her eyes.

  “It’s stupid,” she said.

  “Probably not compared to everything else that has happened this semester.”

  “I had this crush on one of the Alpha Pi brothers and he turned out to be a jerk.”

  “So, you got drunk?”

  “He told me I was too uptight for him. I felt like I had to prove him wrong.”

  “Who was it?” Lizbeth asked.

  “Nobody important.”

  “Was it that guy with the lisp? What was his name? I never remember his name.”

  “His name is Tommy and he had a lisp because he used a retainer.”

  Lizbeth looked at Marie and didn’t say anything.

  With the thesis out of the way, Lizbeth felt less stressed about the rest of the semester, but was struggling to decide what to do the next year. She met with Dr. Bennett to get his advice about graduate school. When she told him that she was dating Wil Darcy he seemed surprised.

  “I was under the impression that you disliked him,” Dr. Bennett said.

  “I was completely unfair to him and allowed my prejudices too much influence over my behavior when it came to him.”

  “Have you met his family? His aunt is a piece of work. She has very clear ideas for what her nephew’s ideal mate should be like.”

  “I have met her. She has been trying to get my father to build a restaurant empire.”

  “I am so sorry for your father. The woman is a terrible hypocrite.”

  “She has been very good for Colin Collins from what Charlotte has told me.”

  “I think a woman like her needs someone like Colin. I could never understand why he wante
d you to help him and then to marry him.”

  “His mother pushed it. She wanted him to marry someone in my family. It was all about the social status for her.”

  “Another woman who does more harm than good to your generation.”

  “She’s not well.”

  “Yes, Colin shared much of that with me at the start of the semester. I know it was difficult for you and the sorority sisters. Still, is Wil any better than Colin?”

  “Wil is... Wil is a lot like me. He doesn’t want what his aunt wants at all. She has rigid ideas of what he should be and what the right woman for him should be like. I think all our conflict over the year was centered on his trying to be what she wanted.”

  “You have seemed... different this semester. I just assumed it was exhaustion.”

  “No, I was trying to process things that happened over the winter break. I learned some things about myself that were difficult to accept.”

  “Does this mean you have changed your plans for graduate school?”

  “No, but I’m still not sure where to go yet.”

  “Then don’t make the rational choice this time. It’s not like you might pick a bad school. Pick the one that feels right,” Dr. Bennett said.

  Lizbeth went to Wil’s house after her lunch with Dr. Bennett. As soon as Wil saw her, he smiled and wrapped her in his arms. Lizbeth made her graduate school decision in a moment.

  ***

  Layla insisted that Lizbeth wear her gown and regalia to the graduation dinner. There was a lot to deal with: hoods, cords, and a medal. In the end, mother and daughter had agreed that Lizbeth would wear it into dinner and then take it off. This way her mother could talk about the regalia with the other parents and Lizbeth didn’t have to bear the burden of wearing it the whole time. The best thing about the graduation ceremony was that it ended. She had Jane sew a little pocket into it. Lizbeth had slipped a small book into the pocket and read while they sat. Wil had given her a pocket edition of some Sherlock Holmes short stories. They were his favorite. She read through about half the book. The girl sitting next to her read over her shoulder. She wished she had her phone, but Layla had taken it. She kept looking for Wil, Jane, and Charlie during the ceremony, but there were so many people that she couldn’t find them. Charlotte and Colin were in the crowd as well. She saw both and waved across the large gym. She didn’t worry too much about finding her friends; they would be together when the ceremony was over.

  “I saw you reading during the ceremony. How far did you get?” Wil said when he found her in the crowd.

  “Half way-ish,” Lizbeth said with a smile.

  “I’m jealous that I didn’t bring a book too. The speaker was so boring and the names droned on.”

  Wil smiled, kissed Lizbeth, and began looking around.

  “They said they would find us,” Lizbeth said.

  She took Wil’s hand and led him over to a short wall. She made him sit down. He wasn’t weighed down by as much regalia as she was, but he had his fair share. She was unsure what he had decided to wear under his gown, but she could see dark slacks and his black Chucks.

  “You didn’t go naked, did you?” he whispered into her ear.

  “No, I wore a very pretty dress. It is just shorter than the gown.”

  “Tease.”

  “You know, if I introduced this Wil to September Wil, he would probably scowl and dislike you.”

  “This is what happens when I’m very comfortable with people.”

  “You do smile a lot more. I was shocked when Ginny showed me those pictures at Christmas. Little Wil with his smile was so cute.”

  “Was that the day Lizzy’s cold heart melted?”

  “Maybe.”

  Only Wil called her Lizzy. There was something about the way the Z’s rolled off his tongue that she adored. He only did it when they were alone or when he was teasing her. The flirtation ended as their friends came into view.

  Lizbeth had learned quickly that there was a public version of Wil and a private version. When they were alone or with close friends, he was relaxed and had a great sense of humor. When he was in public he became stiff, uncomfortable, and formal. He was too busy trying to relax and enjoy himself.

  They arrived at the restaurant with Jane and Charlie. Caroline had gotten stuck with Katherine and Anne. Chris had come as well, with his parents, whom Lizbeth finally got to meet. His father was Katherine’s older brother. Lizbeth hadn’t seen Anne and Chris since Thanksgiving. She was excited for the chance to talk to Chris again.

  “Katherine bitched through the entire ceremony,” Chris said as they chatted at the restaurant. “My father told her to shut the fuck up. I don’t think I’ve ever heard him use the word ‘fuck’ before. It was fantastic.”

  “Did it work?” Wil asked.

  “For a while, but she’s angry that you two are together. She almost refused to come. Anne insisted on coming and Katherine relented when Charlotte and Colin said they would be here.”

  “Becca told me that Anne and Ginny worked together to get everyone here,” Lizbeth said.

  Chris looked over at Becca, Ginny, and Anne. Anne hadn’t changed much since Lizbeth had seen her at Thanksgiving, except that her clothing seemed less dramatic. She was still going through her emo phase, but it was far more understated.

  “Maybe Becca is some sort of catalyst to empower Anne and Ginny. I like the three of them working together,” Chris said.

  “Watch out,” Wil said to Chris. “Becca has a mind of her own and the next thing you know, the three of them will be trying to take over the world together.”

  “Anne is demanding to go to NYU in the fall,” Chris said.

  “Well, good luck NYU. All three of them together may be the ruin of us all,” Lizbeth said.

  Lizbeth and Wil both tried to make the rounds talking to people on their own. After about an hour Jack came out of the kitchen and the food was served.

  “Your grandfather is in the kitchen now,” Wil said when he sat down next to Lizbeth.

  “What is he saying?”

  “He is yelling in French, but mine isn’t good enough to interpret. I did hear the word Hitler.”

  Lizbeth rolled her eyes.

  “He is probably berating the line to keep them cooking.”

  “What is he saying?” Wil asked.

  “He is probably saying, and I know this because it is what he always says, that he didn’t survive Hitler, concentration camps, and starvation so he could sit and watch clowns cook.”

  “Really?”

  “Really. Many chefs consider it a rite of passage to hear him tell them this.”

  “Your dad is all Zen compared to his father.”

  “This is why he had to leave New York.”

  “Lizbeth,” Dr. Bennett said when he found Lizbeth after dinner, “have you decided about graduate school yet? Are you going to the conference next week?”

  Dr. Bennett had been emailing Lizbeth with conference speaking opportunities for weeks. She had applied to a few. Only one small qualitative research conference had accepted her proposal.

  “I’m going to be in the city for some of the summer, so I was able to finalize the conference agenda. I’ll see you there.”

  “We need to make sure to grab dinner. I assume Wil is going to be with you.”

  “Wil and I are planning to spend a month in the city and then we are going to Massachusetts for the rest of the summer.”

  “What about the fall?”

  “I decided to go with Columbia’s Sociology program. They wanted my research as is and offered some funding opportunities for conferences.”

  “That’s fantastic! Does this mean you and Wil are staying together?”

  “Yes, we are going to try living together.”

  “No marriage?”

  Lizbeth nearl
y choked on her own saliva and coughed to clear her lungs.

  “No! I think we have to wait and see if this really works outside of this weird little bubble.”

  “What is he going to do?”

  “He is going to get his MBA at Columbia. Our sisters are both going to be at NYU so it will be comforting to be close by to help them out if needed.”

  “We’ll certainly miss you here.”

  “I’ll see you at conferences, I’m sure.”

  Her mentor gave her a hug before walking away to find Layla and Jack. The three of them had been chatting off and on all afternoon. Jack was thrilled that someone wanted to talk about Layla’s academic work more than her murder mysteries.

  Jane, Lizbeth, and Charlotte didn’t get any time together until the party started winding down. The three of them sat, glasses of champagne in hand, and discussed how differently it had all turned out.

  “Who would have thought that Charlotte would be the first to get married?” Jane said.

  “Who did you think would be first?” Charlotte asked.

  “Well, me,” Jane said.

  “What is your plan now Charlotte?” Lizbeth asked.

  “I’m going to help Colin with his car rental business. Katherine helped him build the plan and funded some of it, and I’m going to run the Kickstarter. We will take funders from everywhere. I’m going to help him promote the project locally. I’ve met some very wealthy people in the state through the art scene. I’m going to have a gallery show soon and a lot of my older pieces have sold. What about you, Jane?”

  “Back to New Orleans, but Charlie and I are going to get an apartment of our own.”

  “Graduate school?” Charlotte asked.

  “Nope, I’m going to focus on graphic design. Helping Colin got the attention of new businesses. They want less cutesy and more modern designs than I’d done at school. They also pay a lot more. I’ve saved enough to pay for a few years of graduate school. I’m going to use the money to live on and build a business. Charlie’s father knows a few people he thinks will want me to help with graphic design and marketing. He says I have a good future and will help me put together a real business plan.”