Facing Evil

by C L Hart

  She looked up at her with tears in her eyes.

  “So am I, Abby, so am I. It feels like I have been waiting a lifetime to see you again, but right now, I can’t stand the sight of you!” She walked away, leaving the three on the dock silenced by her bitterness and understandable anger.

  Feeling his age, Nathan took a seat on the bench. Lincoln licked at his split lip, and Abby stood silently brooding.

  The dark clouds at the end of the lake brought a chilling wind as Abby turned to face Lincoln. “I’m sorry, I wanted to tell you the truth, but I didn’t know where to start or how to explain. And,” she motioned to his lip, “I’m sorry for that.”

  Lincoln didn’t respond.

  “Lincoln,” Nathan said with a sigh, “my intentions were honorable, however I’ve lived in shame for what I did. I should have done more, but I can’t change that now. I always feared that one day the truth would come out and everything that I had tried to protect would be destroyed, and the more people who knew, the bigger those chances were.”

  Lincoln looked from the lawyer to Abby. “At what point would the truth have come out if I hadn’t found it — when they were strapping Abby to the chair? Or would the two of you have taken it to the grave?” Lincoln turned and left.

  Nathan felt emotionally and physically drained. “I’m sorry, Abby.”

  “So am I,” she said as she watched the light in Sarah’s bedroom come on. “So am I.”

  He turned around and saw what she was looking at. “Give them time, they’ll get over it.”

  Sarah’s light went out. “And what if they don’t?” She glanced at him with tired eyes. “Can I live with myself?”

  Nathan pulled his eyes away from the cabin and looked out over the water. “You don’t have a choice, Abby, that’s the hardest part.”

  Chapter 34

  The cabin was dark and still when Abby slipped silently into the kitchen in search of the open bottle of Aquavit on the counter. Pouring a glass, she tossed it back with one swallow. She left the glass next to the sink and, with the bottle in her hand, she headed outside.

  Sitting down in one of the chairs on the deck, she took a drink from the bottle as she thought about her past and what it meant for her future. Her parents were gone, and the brother who had haunted and hunted her was out of her life for good.

  As a child, she had feared him, but as an adult she had loathed him. Yet somewhere deep inside, she still felt a loss. For all of his life Billy had reminded her that she was everything he was not. Her outgoing personality and athletic ability overshadowed his shy, clumsy nature. They were opposites in almost every way, but their intellect was quite comparable.

  Abby’s birth had brought out a side of Billy no one wanted to discuss. He had always felt he needed to be better than her in order to belong. Soon that competitiveness had become unhealthy. He turned on her, becoming mean and vengeful. With mixed pain and relief, she recalled the day he had left. She didn’t understand what a ward of the court was; all she knew was he wasn’t going to be there to hurt her any more. But he did come back, and he hurt her more than she thought possible — he hurt Sarah.

  Sarah. The ache was almost unbearable, so she took another drink, trying to dull the feelings inside of her. She couldn’t. She couldn’t hide any more, not from them and not from herself. Over the years she had learned to do things out of necessity, things to help her to forget, but her memories wouldn’t let her. She had become a master of concealment, hiding her emotions and feelings behind an impassable armor, though only when she was awake. The night brought dreams she couldn’t control, nightmares that would always remind her of what had happened. No matter what she did she couldn’t escape, so she built her walls higher and thicker. Nobody could hurt her if she never let anybody in.

  Abby leaned back and took another drink. The nightmares that haunted her sleep had now become her reality — one she had always feared. Grabbing the bottle by the neck, Abby left the deck and headed down to the dock. Ignoring the approaching storm, she lay down on the wood and looked up at the swirling clouds.

  “Same sky, same place,” she sighed deeply, “same woman.” She reached for the bottle and chuckled. “Same drink.” She reached out, but her smile faded as she remembered Buck was no longer there for her to pat; he couldn’t hear her. Tears filled her eyes as she tilted her head back to finish the bottle. She left it sitting on the dock and went in search of more alcohol to ease her pain.

  Creeping back into the cabin, she stopped outside Sarah’s door. Swaying slightly, she thought about knocking, but her hand stopped in mid-air. What was she going to say? Nothing had changed. It had still been her brother who hurt Sarah, and it was still her deception.

  Staggering and stumbling as she turned, Abby went to the kitchen cupboard for another bottle. Being as quiet as a drunken person could be, she searched the kitchen, but there was nothing left for her to drink. Disappointed, she sat down on the sofa and stared down at the coffee table. She spotted a felt marker and decided to leave Sarah a note. Pulling the cap off with her teeth, she looked for something to write on and then her eyes fell on the mirror.

  Stepping back to look at the words she had written, she caught her reflection and she sneered at what she saw. Her hair hung wet and stringy around her pale face, her eyes were dark and bloodshot. Suddenly she thought about someone else’s reflection and what she must have seen. Sarah, what have I done to you?

  Frustrated and angry, Abby staggered back down to the end of the dock. Too many voices were churning in her head as she watched the clouds darken. Dropping her aching head into her hands, she tried to unravel the mess that was her life.

  “I have no more secrets and there are no more lies, so why don’t I feel any better?” she yelled into the storm. The question had no answer, at least none she could think of in her inebriated state. The skies crashed and thundered as she tried to make sense of her life.

  “I need more to drink.” She stood up and made her way along the path to the lodge — and to more alcohol.

  Stepping into the protection of the lodge, Abby looked around at what was familiar and what was new. There was a wall of pictures she hadn’t noticed before and she wandered over to it. She looked at picture after picture, families and couples enjoying their stay at Gold Creek. The more she looked at the happy faces, the more she realized alcohol wouldn’t cure the regret and the shame she was feeling. It was time to sober up and face what was left of her life. Leaving the collage behind, Abby made her way to the kitchen and some much needed food.

  ♥

  Sarah had cried herself to sleep and then woke up several times during the night, unsure of what was real and what had been a nightmare. How could she love the woman whose very existence had led the evil to prey upon her? She didn’t know how she could love Abby despite everything, but she knew that she did. How could she have kept his identity from me? And yet it wasn’t her that put all of this into motion, it was Billy. Sarah tossed and turned as the night twisted the truth she thought she knew, and what she couldn’t believe. Abby, why couldn’t you have just told me? Why did you have to keep it a secret?

  She had heard Abby come in at one point and she had lain awake hoping for a knock on her door, but the only sounds she’d heard were the tinkling of a glass being removed from the cupboard, and the splashing of liquid filling it. She knew Abby was into the Aquavit Günter had left behind. Struggling between love and anger, trust and betrayal, Sarah debated going out to talk to her, but the decision was made for her when she fell back to sleep.

  The next time she woke up, she still felt tired, though she no longer wanted to sleep. It was time to get up to face the hard reality of the truth. A quick peek inside the other bedroom told her Abby’s bed had not been slept in.

  “Old habits die hard,” she muttered in reference to Abby’s sleeping patterns. It also didn’t surprise her to see an empty living room and a glass, with Aquavit residue in it, sitting next to the sink. Walking around the counter
, she stopped and looked out the front windows, but there was no sign of Abby on the deck. A frown creased her forehead when she spotted handwriting on the mirror above the fireplace.

  I love you. I never meant to hurt you. Forgive me. A

  Chills running up her spine, Sarah stared at the barely legible message for a long time. She looked back at the glass by the sink and at the open bedroom door, and then stepped outside.

  Menacing dark clouds rolled over the mountaintops, sucking the light from the sky. The air was muggy and humid as the storm lingered over the entire valley. Standing at the edge of the deck, she could barely see down to the gloomy waters of the lake, and it was too dark to see the end of the dock.

  “Abby,” she whispered, ominous feelings rising inside her. Something was wrong — very, very wrong. Spinning around in growing panic, she looked at the cabin and then back to the eerie calm of the lake. “Abby,” she said louder. Far off in the distance, the skies flashed and it caused her to jump. Electricity raised the hair on her arms as her eyes searched the darkness. “Abby!” she called out, but her voice was lost in the rolling thunder that rocked the entire shoreline.

  Looking down the lake, Sarah could see a sheet of rain bearing down on her. Suddenly gusts of wind began to churn up the waters, blowing her hair into her eyes and blinding her. She quickly went down the stairs and looked out, but the lake refused to divulge any of its secrets. Panic and fear clouded her mind as she tried to think of where Abby might have gone.

  The lake water was being tossed in earnest now as the winds lifted the surface into whitecaps. Sarah felt the first few drops of the coming rain and she brought her hand up to shield her eyes as a flash of lightning lit up the sky. Through the rain, she saw an empty Aquavit bottle discarded on the bench at the end of the dock.

  Sarah hurried toward the bench. “Abby!” she called, but her voice was swept into the wind and the intensifying gale. Picking up the empty bottle, she peered into the water. With the help of a flash of lightning, Sarah saw a dark shadow in the water and her aching heart went still. “Abby!” Her scream was lost in the storm.

  ♥

  Hunched over a sandwich in the main lodge, Abby looked out the window at the storm. Mother Nature was displaying all of her power and fury as thunder rumbled the walls and lightning lit up the sky. Peering out into the darkness, Abby brought her cup of coffee to her mouth, but froze when she saw someone on one of the docks.

  “Holy shit!” she exclaimed. “Get off the dock, you fool.” She ran for the door and out into the storm. The wind whipped at her hair as she made her way down the grassy lawn toward the shoreline.

  “Get off the dock, there’s lightning out there,” she yelled through cupped hands, though her voice couldn’t be heard over the wind. Abby started to lift her arms up to wave when she realized who it was on the end of the dock.

  “Sarah!” Thunder boomed all around her. “Sarah, get off the dock!” She waved wildly, but Sarah’s attention was elsewhere. Abby knew she had to get to her, and quickly.

  Large raindrops pounded the ground around her as she sprinted down the gravel driveway. “Sarah!” she yelled when the entire sky lit up over their heads. Then, to her horror, she watched helplessly as Sarah dove into the blackness of Lake Alouette and immediately vanished from sight.

  “NO!” she screamed as she powered her long legs down the dock and launched herself into the water. Diving down, she searched the depths, though there was nothing for her to see. She wanted to scream, but she couldn’t as she turned left and right, feeling and searching the cold, dark waters. Every second was precious as she moved underwater, but inevitably her lungs burned for oxygen and she had to go up for air. Abby broke the surface, the choppy waves making it nearly impossible for her to see anything.

  “Sarah!” Abby screamed, but she was answered only by the sounds of the storm. Taking a deep breath, she dove back down under the water. Moving further away from the dock, Abby reached out into the blackness and touched something. Grabbing hold of whatever it was, she pushed to the surface, dragging her catch with her. The moment her head was clear of the water, she looked down at the motionless woman in her grasp. They had been in such a situation before, but this time things were different.

  “Sarah.” Abby pulled the limp body higher in the water, yanking her head up as she kicked her legs and propelled them toward the dock. Over and over she called out to Sarah, but there was no response. Abby felt the ground come up beneath her feet and she hauled Sarah's deadweight up onto the dock through the pouring rain. The winds howled overhead as Abby climbed out and knelt down next to Sarah. She immediately checked for a pulse, the action bringing a flash of déjà vu which she quickly shook off. Sarah’s heartbeat was strong, but she wasn’t breathing. Abby leaned over and began artificial respiration.

  “Breathe, Sarah!” she screamed between breaths. “Come on!” She pushed air into her lungs and challenged her to come back. “Don’t give up now.” Abby’s hands were shaking so badly she could barely pinch Sarah’s nose closed as she continued her desperate attempt to bring her back to life. “Damn it, Sarah, don’t you give up — you’re a fighter. Breathe!” she demanded and suddenly, without warning, Sarah obeyed. Her mouth opened wide and a rush of water came out as she coughed and gagged.

  “Sarah,” Abby sobbed as she turned her over, allowing the young woman to expel a portion of what she had inhaled. Holding her and crying at the same time, Abby brushed the wet hair back out of her eyes.

  “Why, Sarah? What were you thinking?”

  Sarah coughed violently, trying to clear her lungs as she clung to Abby. After several long minutes, she finally sat up straighter and the two women faced each other while the storm blew violently around them.

  “What were you trying to do?” Abby asked as she kissed the top of her head.

  “I was... I thought...” cough “I thought you’d...” cough “I thought you’d fallen in.” She pointed at the empty bottle of Aquavit sitting on the bench in the rain.

  Abby tightened her embrace. “Sarah you jumped into the lake because you thought I had?”

  Sarah nodded, shaking the rain from the end of her nose. “I couldn’t find you,” she said forlornly.

  “But Sarah,” Abby said in shock, “I thought you were trying to kill yourself. You jumped in the lake... Sarah, you don’t know how to swim.”

  Sarah turned to look at her and managed a weak smile. “I-I forgot.”

  Abby let her tears fall as she returned the smile. “God, I love you,” she whispered while a flash of lightning shot overhead. “Come on, I need to get you inside,” she said as she easily scooped the young woman up in her arms.

  Sarah studied the face so close to her, and she could smell the strong odor of alcohol. “I saw the note on the mirror, and the empty bottle...and well, I thought I saw something in the lake, and...”

  She stopped talking and Abby stopped walking. “You thought I’d had too much too drink and had fallen in?” Abby asked still in shock over what Sarah had done.

  “Fallen in, or jumped in,” she answered honestly. “You seem to drink a lot. ... Or is that only when I’m around?”

  Abby ignored the question, saying nothing until they were inside the shelter of the cabin. “I thought you wanted to leave,” she said as she set Sarah on her feet.

  “I did...I do. I’m angry with you.”

  “How many times can I say I’m sorry? I never meant for this to happen—”

  “But it did, and you lied about why it happened,” Sarah stated simply. “He was your brother, Abby, I just can’t— I don’t understand why you felt that you had to keep the truth from me.” She was confused and she wanted answers. “Can you at least help me understand?”

  Her face was twisted with painful memories of what she had been through and it tore at Abby’s heart. Looking away from Sarah, Abby forced herself to recall another time and another place. “I don’t fully understand why he did it. I was too young.” Rubbing her hands t
ogether, she spoke about her past. “I knew there was something about him that scared me, and when he realized it, he used that fear.” Abby swallowed. “They tried to help him, Mom and Dad did, but he seemed to resent it. The more doctors they sent him to, the more troubled he became. And then that afternoon...” She glanced at Sarah and saw that she was listening intently. “I know now what he really wanted was to hurt me. So they sent him away and he went to live with another family. And then that summer I found him hiding in one of the cabins. I should have told someone he was there, but I was scared.”

  Abby turned her attention back to Sarah. “When I think about Mom and Dad, or those women, and when I look at you I can’t help remembering the boy I knew.” For the first time, Abby reached toward the scar on Sarah’s neck.

  She pulled away before Abby could touch her. “No, Abby, don’t. I’m not talking about the past. I’m talking about now, about us. Why didn’t you ever tell me who he was?”

  “Sarah, I didn’t know that you knew him...personally, not until the day that we found you, and after that it was too late. And I didn’t think it would make anything better...or different.” She paused for a moment while her eyes lingered on the scar on Sarah’s neck. “I can’t change anything now, I want to, but I can’t. He’s gone, though the memories of what he did will never go away.”

  “No, they won’t,” Sarah said. “They won’t go away no matter how much you drink, Abby! You know, one day you may sober up, but I will still be left with the scars.” She was angry and her words were bitter and sharp. “I don’t climb inside of a bottle every time I can’t face something. But you know what, Abby? The reasons why he did what he did aren’t half as important to me as why you did what you did. The past is the past, though the present would have been so much different if we had both been truthful with one another.”

  The resentment in her voice was clear and Abby hung her head. She struggled for some semblance of a response, but she knew there wasn’t one.