A Life Plan Without You.

by Christine Wood

  His hand was under my skirt as his finger, moved towards my sex, it pulsed like a beacon, and the heat radiating from it drew him in. Arghhhh, he worked me slowly to a silent frenzy this felt different, much more intimate, we had done this many times and in lots of places, in fact every time I had a skirt on his hands went a wandering.

  His kisses were as ever gentle and as the other finger joined its mate, working me stretching me, and making me come and as he did, he looked down at me kissing me deeply, his tongues slipping in and out of my mouth.

  “You are so ready for me baby if we were on our own, you would be mine Michelle, just mine. I can feel you, you’re so close Mi cielo, you’re coming again, do it baby come for me, I love watching you collapse your fun to watch as you come baby, that’s it Missy let go…” As I surrendered to him for the second time in as many minutes, he kissed me an as he does, a tear comes down his face.

  “We needed to find each other Mi cielo and now I have you, I never want to ever lose you, I want to grow old with you and fill a house full of kids with you.”

  “Umm right back at you Sam. You and your soldier are going to need a rest, you’re going to be on an all-night recon Saturday, and he will need it. I can’t wait get your arse next to me. I need to feel you against me as we sleep. You aren’t ever going to lose me ever, now shush I’m coming down off a really nice high thank you.” I smiled and watched him as he got undressed, what a body and he was such a tease with it. I stripped off to my undies and got in the bed.

  I wasn’t sure how this was going to end, but he wouldn’t be hurt anymore or anytime soon by his father. Sam climbed in and just held me. I was so tired, but my brain was going two hundred miles an hour, he bless had fallen asleep. He had me tucked under his chin and held me close. I was up most of the night, waiting for the night terrors, but thank fully they didn’t put an appearance in. I must have fallen asleep at some point though, Jimmy was calling my name.

  “Michelle we have to be off in about half an hour, are you getting your bum out of bed.” Shit all I had been the clothes from yesterday I got dressed and went down.

  “Where’s Sam gone?” I was being ushered to the car. Jimmy chucked some toast at me.

  “We are going to be late he and Mum are doing the things you suggested.” We arrived at college.

  “Thanks Aunty Allison, I will see you later.” Jimmy was waiting for me. “I am so bloody tired I was up all night.” He blushed. “No not doing that, you cheeky sod he’d had horrid nightmares the night before and so was waiting for the encore last night.” He laughed.

  “I didn’t think you meant anything else.” I smiled.

  “As long as it’s not common knowledge by dinnertime you’re safe from Rocky. Good luck, see you later.” He gave my cheek a kiss, quite sweet. I went straight to the art room.

  I had three hours to put my thoughts into the piece of art before me. Miniature picture frames put together and made with various pieces of wood and steel, whatever was in the art supply tubs. I tied string to the frames and placed a picture frame at the end. I used wire to tie them as though being spewed from the pinkish brain, I had thrown together made from pillow filling and covered in pink and cream tissue paper, weird sausage shapes made it look realistic and now it had dried it looked very brain like. Placing one end of the wired string in the brain, allowing me to position the frames coming out of the brain, thus creating the boundaries of the mind, I had fifteen picture frames I wrote words of inspiration and my thoughts and feelings.

  I stood back it looked a little abstract in design. Mr Wisdom looked at it and smiled. Miss Shearer went a little nutty as she clapped as she saw what I had done.

  “Have you finished Michelle?” I took a last look, my candidate number added and yep all done and dusted. I ambled towards home. Sam was waiting at the gate for me. I ran into his waiting arms for the nicest of kisses.

  “I was nearly late this morning Jimmy woke me with minutes to spare. I’m starving and I stink and I missed you this morning.” I looked at him grinning.

  “You were spot on with the advice to Mum by the way. All paperwork is now being, filed and legal separation from Dad, divorce was too much for Mum. We also went into the council, he isn’t on the rent book as you said its Mum’s house, he was it seemed too pissed to sign, and so they are sending the letters today. You’re coming to celebrate with me, so let’s get you home to change. How did the art piece go?” I beamed.

  “Brilliant, 'Boundaries of the Mind' is an abstract view, into the different things involved in life, love, and our existence.”

  “Did the tutors like it?” I smiled.

  “Both of them loved it, though thinking about it, it had a little bit of a ‘Contemporary Realism,’ theme going on with it One even asked me the story behind my inspiration. I don’t think she knew what to make of first loves, because my piece had hate, confusion, needs and other things other than just the mushy stuff of love?” Jimmy came running towards us.

  “I waited for you, to see how it went?” Sam smiled and Jimmy listened, fearing he would have to go to his dad.

  “Mum has signed papers and as your over eighteen, you’re legally an adult and free to choose with whom you live. Stop worrying now please, should anything happen to her I’m your conservator, I have agreed to pay your bills and stuff until you get the money, or a job are you coming with us for something to eat?”

  “No thanks, but have you got some money, I want to go with the lads please, legal guardian?” He handed him some and off he disappeared.

  “He’s totally different these days he’s stopped being moody, and he actually talks, instead of the grunting he normally comes back at you with.” Smug smile I knew it was his dads doing, a few minutes later and we were at mine.

  “Mum I’m home.” She was in the kitchen.

  “Are you all right Sam, Michelle said you weren’t well?” He looked at me and smiled.

  “She looked after me thanks for asking. I got her back it was me, being sick for her this time.” She smiled at him, as his arms hugged me tighter.

  “How’s life at your aunt’s?” I put the kettle on.

  “It is a lot better with no hassles and we like it.” I went to get dressed. I pulled out the blue dress, I hadn’t yet worn and the new shoes to go with it, of course the underwear. I had a quick, but much needed shower. Deodorant and hair done, dressed. Bag grabbed and money lippy, mints and perfume in it, tissues, and my new pack of pills, as I couldn’t find the one’s I had in my bag a couple of days ago I’d had the morning one, but couldn’t find the buggers luckily I had a packet in my locker at college and I took the morning one the day Sam turned funny, I shiver at the memory. I take the one I need to, and put them away locked in the zip part of my purse, I must remember I need a new prescription, now I will be doing it. I definitely don’t want to get pregnant, well not yet anyway. I put a couple of new dresses, in the dress bag, including the new white dress from Sam and the shoes and spare underwear.

  “Ready will this do Mum, Sam?” I got a very nice from mum and a wow from him.

  “Were are you off to today then?” I didn’t know this was a Sam surprise.

  “We are going to The Stockton Castle, with the rest of the mob for a celebration dinner. Mum has sorted Dad out at long last and we can finally get back to some sort of normal life.” She smiled at him she knew what it was like living with a person who drinks too much.

  “See you later Mum.” She asked if I would be back. I shook my head.

  “No Mum, no college tomorrow.” We said goodbye and left.

  “We’re going out after class and we have Kelly’s party Saturday I have the outfit for that already. Sorry the hotel had to be put on hold.” He smiled

  “Fate telling us something you think?” I frowned.

  “Damn fate, it’s a pain in the bum she is definitely not in my good books Sam!” We were in the Night Owl and dad was in drinking and propping up the bar. I went up and spoke to him Sam bought the dri
nks with one for dad.

  “Cheers.” He smiled at me.

  “What are you drinking young lady?” I gave him my coke and he sipped it.

  “Sam won’t let me drink Dad, so stop worrying.” I laughed, my first legal drink with my dad, all be it coke. He never allowed me to go into pubs, and as to drinking, he didn’t like me drinking he needed me aware of things going on around me, I know why now but back then I didn’t, he’s relaxed more with Sam by my side, and as he likes Sam, it’s a double result for me, he’s allowing me to finally grow up.

  “Watch your back Sam your fathers just walked in.” I looked at him held his hand tightly, he looked at me smiled kissed my neck and whispered in my ear as he kissed my neck, umm.

  “If you can do it, I can too. I love you Missy.” He came over.

  “Sam you have something for me Son?” I held his hand tight and kept quiet.

  “Why would I have anything for you Dennis? I told you, you’re not getting a penny more and for the record as of today I do not have a Father, you are dead to me, Andy and Jimmy are also of the same mind, so just go away.”

  “You little bastard, who the fuck do you think you’re talking to? I’m your father respect is what’s called for, pay your fucking board, you’re not living off me for free.” Sam laughed, which shocked his father, mine too.

  “Respect is earned, I have more respect for my Dad Michael in the short time I have known him, than all my twenty-two sorry years, I’ve had you as my father. As for board take it out of the five hundred you stole from my drawer, then beat up my brother and assaulted my mother for! You’re getting nothing from me or any of us ever again, your fucking free ride is over, work for it like I have too.” His dad went to hit him, dad moved to help but I held him back, Sam side stepped the punch and came back at him hitting him on his jaw.

  “Now you stupid drunk bastard, do yourself a favour and do the world and favour and disappear. Come anywhere near Michelle, Mum, my brothers or me and what you did to us will be nothing to what we do to you. Now I’m going to say this once you’ve had everything and done everything to me for the last time, now fuck off.” He got up and went to hit him again. I held dad back.

  “He has to do this himself Dad please, if he needs your help I promise you can.” Sam had his dad’s arm behind his back, marched him to the pub door, and threw him out onto the street.

  “Last time Dad, next time I will hurt you more than you ever hurt me. I’m not the fucking helpless four year old you beat up and burnt, so move your backside away from here and if I see you again, make no doubts about it, I will do as I say. There’s a restraining order keeping you away from us, so move before you’re in the cells for the night.” He walked away. Dad looked at me with the pity face Sam hated.

  “He’s been hitting the lad since he was four?” Sam had gone to the toilet.

  “He’s done a lot worse Dad you don’t know the half of it. It’s only because he hit me that the family moved out.” He looked at me. I held him back he was angry, so angry.

  “He will be sorry for that when I see him again, you should have said, nobody touches my daughter like that, he will be sorry. Did he hurt Sam’s mum a lot too, I know the stuff she was in hospital for was bad, he did that, I’m not stupid, your mum said you needed my help you should have told me everything? Truth Michelle, I need to know what those boys and their mother have had to go through.” Sam was back. He listened as I told dad and dad was angry he held Sam close, something a bit strange for them both, but something they seemed to need, I know Sam did. My dad is fantastic and I need to cry.

  “Are you all right Son? I think he knows where he stands and he certainly, will know it when I see him for touching Michelle. Look I’m going home now. We’ll see you, over the weekend. Nice having you look after my daughter Sam, but your dad will be sorry when I see him. Tell your mother he will pay, I don’t think he will be around again, should have told me Michelle, you know you aren’t to be touched, like that are you two still going away at the weekend? It may do you both the world of good?” Dad was gunning for Dennis, warned off and yet still he came, so it was his own fault.

  “You all right angel? Have you found your voice? Do you feel any better, now you’ve faced that demon?” He was white. “Come on let’s get out of here.” I held him tightly. We went and sat in the gardens opposite. Dad was on his way home and there was no sign of Dennis. “We went in there because you knew he would be in didn’t you?” He nodded. “You’ve been sick again too?” He nodded again. “Do you still need me?” I laughed because he’d just nodded and smiled.

  “Always and forever you’re the girl who rules my world, your dad’s mad at you.” I pulled the mints from the bag gave him a couple and kissed him.

  “Dad is never mad at me for long, but hugging you was different, he likes you. I told you Dad always looks after me, and welcome to the family, your dad’s a dead man running. Do you need stuff for tonight and tomorrow? All of your things are at his?”

  “Yes baby I do, good thinking. Your dad is brilliant, Michelle do you know how lucky I feel having you and being part of your family?” I gave my sappy fiancé a kiss, and we went shopping for Sam and hit Ivor’s I picked some things for him.

  “This thing works both ways Sam.” I piled the stuff on the counter, but his card was out before my cash. He laughed as he beat me to it and pulled me into his arms for another kiss.

  “You are so right for me you fit perfectly in these arms Mi cielo. I wonder how well we fit in the other places, fancy being mine properly? This weekend, be mine forever?” Sounds like a plan. “We’ll grab an early night Friday, in an empty house just you and me in Aunties big comfy bed, say yes Michelle I can’t wait?” He smiled and pulled me in for a tear filled knee trembling kiss, his tongue gently stroking the sides of my mouth as my hands hung on to him tightly. As he pulled away, he nipped at my lip and smiled. “If we hadn’t got the bloody family meal planned, which Mum and Aunty need, we would be whizzing down to London now.”

  “Oh, that sounds like you have finally given in to my demands for your body. We need something to eat please, I'll grab us a sandwich from the shop, and I can’t wait Sam but now it’s here I’m sort of nervous.” Hugging and smiling as we head for the bakery. He stopped outside with the bags, sunning himself on the bench. I managed to pay the vast fortune for lunch and we sat and ate them in the gardens opposite, and he was definitely a different person. A little more relaxed, happier and a lot less tense.

  “Finished Rocky?” My new name was beginning to stick.

  “I have Adrian.” Nice comeback I thought. We went into The Frog and he went to the bar for drinks. I sat watching him as he walked back to me I noticed that smile, that body, it and he were so relaxed. I pulled him to me for a much needed kiss. I looked over his shoulder and Janet from the photo, was coming towards the table. He hadn’t seen her as his back was to her, I kissed him again and as he pulled away from the kiss, he sighed just as she spoke.

  “What a nice surprise! How strange over two years and nothing and now I’m with you again, what are the odds of that?” He smiled across at me, got up and sat at my side. His eyes not looking at her but at me, his arm tightly wrapped around me.

  “Michelle, meet Janet, Janet this is Michelle my fiancée. I think you met Janet, didn’t you darling and overheard the conversation in the loo, all about our awful sex sessions and her being a prostitute, nothing but a cheap tart who lay down with me for a few trinkets and crap, but you give a crap service and you don’t get paid! It’s a wonder you do any trade at all, you’re looking older Janet, being a slapper must be taking its toll, after all you can’t be a hooker all your life can you?

  I’m ashamed to say this Michelle she taught me nothing, a quick end away twice a week, shit half an hour with you baby and it more than covers what we did for the oh erm ten minutes I’d wiggle on top of you Janet you were a tad frigid, do you only do the kinky stuff because you can’t do the proper stuff? Well not well enoug
h to keep me entertained, fucking you for ten minutes was bloody hard work, and I can’t believe you thought I loved you? Love is not a two ten minute fuck with a woman old enough to be my Mother?” I laughed Sam was on a roll and boy was she blowing steam out of her arse!

  “Good job I have a better teacher now, your lessons are so much better Michelle. All night and day with you is so hot and mind blowing. My master chef and fantastic lover all rolled up in a fit and fantastic young body, which gives me hours of pleasure just looking at, I’m in rapture when we make love for hours baby. Thank you for being such a fantastic teacher, fiancé and friend baby!” I smiled at her, her face it was a picture as he kissed me again.

  “He’s not got you a proper ring then? He’s bought you things too he does well at that, buying stuff to compensate how crap he is.” I smiled at her.

  “Hell Janet, not all of us are like you. Some people buy their own things. As to the ring, what’s more proper than a Claddagh ring, a promise of love, fidelity and commitment bitch, something missing from your tiny underused brain, if you used that, as much as you use your vagina to get what you want, you may be able to understand what you threw away.

  Oh, and for the record Sam’s kisses are so very sweet, perhaps it was just that he was kissing an old bitter lemon, that they weren’t that good, he was after all kissing you. Sam actually doesn’t have anything to compensate me for Janet, because he’s far from crap at sex, and I do agree with one thing you said, I am indeed dead lucky to get all of him and all night long wow, and just getting him and his body is all I need, because if Sam had to reward me for the amazing sex we’d had and have, by buying me stuff, I’d be dripping in diamonds and furs, but as I’m not into materialistic shows of gratitude, nor into showing how wealthy my fiancé is and he is. He’d be shopping all day and every day, instead of in our bed, such a waste of his fantastic talents. I much prefer he rewards me with his body, which he does all night long and boy until I ache…” He smiles and runs a row of kisses down my back as I cross my fingers tightly, umm so nice and her face is a picture as we don’t bow down to her and we actually are enjoying rubbing her nose into what she did to Sam.