Sammy in Bali (Single Wide Female Travels #7)

by Lillianna Blake

  “Max! I think we have a problem!”

  “Don’t move, stay perfectly still.”

  “No, Max, that’s if a bear is attacking you!”

  “If a bear was attacking me I’d run! Oh wait, that’s it. Run—and zig-zag!”

  “That’s for alligators, Max!” I groaned and dodged the monkey as she barreled toward me. She was fast and wanted a banana. “Max, give me your banana!”

  “Okay, here you go, catch it!” He held it up in the air.

  “No, don’t throw it!”

  It was too late. The banana whizzed through the air and the little monkey that stole the first one caught it quite easily. The large monkey was still after me.

  I jumped up onto a low branch and gasped as she jumped up beside me. The branch creaked under our weight. I closed my eyes and prepared to be pummeled by a monkey. The next thing I knew, she had her long fingers tangled in my hair. She tugged at it, then swept her fingers deeper against my scalp.

  I opened my eyes and realized that she was grooming me.

  “Samantha, what are you doing up on that tree limb?” Wayan stared up at me with wide eyes. “I don’t think that’s allowed.”

  I gritted my teeth and looked down at her. “Please help me.”

  Wayan covered her mouth to muffle a laugh and held out one of her bananas to the monkey. The monkey picked at my hair a moment longer, then jumped down to the ground to take the banana. While she was distracted by the banana I climbed down and headed straight for Max.

  “Did that monkey hurt you?” He tried to keep a straight face as he smoothed down my hair.

  “Not funny, Max, not funny at all. The next angry monkey I see, I’m throwing a banana at you.”

  “Sammy, be nice.” He grinned.

  I was much more cautious as we moved through the forest. We continued to explore for some time.

  I noticed that Wayan’s daughter had a special interest in the animals. Not only did she like to watch them, they seemed to like to watch her. She danced and a few of the monkeys imitated her movements. I laughed as she bounced from foot to foot and tried to make the same sounds as the monkeys.

  For a moment I flashed back to being a child, when it didn’t matter to me what I was doing as long as I was having fun. I could sing along to the radio at the top of my lungs without a care for what the neighbors might say.

  Wayan stuck her tongue out at one of the monkeys and the monkey stuck his tongue out at her. She laughed loudly, and it was music to my ears. I grabbed my camera and snapped a few pictures.

  A few minutes later we entered an area of the forest that had many hanging vines. Little Wayan grabbed onto one of the low vines and swung back and forth with a grin. I snapped a few more pictures with the hope of capturing the delight in her eyes.

  Max, little Wayan, and her brother got a little ahead of us. We rounded a bend and there was a low branch with a long vine that hung above it.

  Wayan climbed up on the branch. “Oh, I have to swing on that one!”

  “Wayan, be careful. I’m not sure if you should do that.” I frowned and looked along the path for her mother. Did I have the right to tell someone else’s child that something was too dangerous? This was brand new territory for me.

  Whether I did or not didn’t matter, because Wayan scrambled up on the branch so fast that there was no time to stop her. She grabbed the vine and went running off of the branch. As I saw her swing through the air my heart stopped, but my body did not.

  I lunged forward in an attempt to grab her, but her body slipped right out of my fingers. She swung right past a blockade into one of the areas that were not open to tourists.

  Chapter 24

  “Wayan!” I screamed and ran around the barricade to get to her. As my footing slipped through the moist soil I spotted her. She was dangling from the vine over a pile of rocks. “Don’t move, honey! I’m coming!”

  I didn’t even think about how steep the path was or where Wayan’s mother was or where Max was. All I thought about was getting to Wayan before her hands slipped and she fell onto the rocks. When I reached her I wrapped my arms around her legs and held them tight. “Okay, sweetheart, you can let go. I’ve got you.”

  Behind me I heard Wayan calling for her daughter. I heard the pounding of Max’s footsteps as he ran toward us. But my eyes remained on Wayan as she uncurled her fingers from the vine. Her little body trembled. She hadn’t been afraid when she grabbed the vine, but now she was. She understood that she’d done something very dangerous.

  A staff member ran toward us from the other direction. “You shouldn’t be in here. All of you—back behind the barricade.”

  Wayan collapsed into my arms. I held her close with tears in my eyes until her mother took her from my arms. I wiped at my eyes as Max put his hand on my shoulder.

  “Sammy, it’s okay. She’s alright.”

  “I know. That’s why I’m crying. I’m just so relieved.”

  We made our way out from behind the barricade and walked toward the entrance of the park.

  After Wayan comforted her daughter she turned back to me. “I’m so sorry, Samantha. I didn’t know she’d cause so much trouble. She’s usually well-behaved.”

  “She was just being curious and adventurous. I’m sorry I didn’t catch her before she took off.”

  “Don’t be, you were there when she needed you. You have amazing maternal instincts.” She squeezed my hand, then guided her two children toward the car.

  Her words surprised me. I’d never thought of myself as having any kind of instincts, let alone maternal ones.

  On the ride home I couldn’t stop thinking about what Wayan had said. Could it be true? If it had been my own child hanging from that vine, how would I have reacted?

  I glanced at Max in the backseat. Both children had fallen asleep with their heads on his arms. It was a sweet sight, but I could also see the discomfort in his eyes. His arms were probably asleep but he was afraid to move and wake them.

  Wayan stopped at the hotel and looked over at me. “I’m sorry again for what happened today.”

  “Don’t be, Wayan. It’s just something that happens.”

  “Maybe, but I didn’t want your visit to be ruined.”

  “It wasn’t. I loved having time with you and the kids. I’m looking forward to the book signing tomorrow.”

  “Good.” She smiled, but I could see the blush in her cheeks. I wished there was a way that I could convince her not to be embarrassed or upset.

  Max shifted his way out from under the kids and attempted to climb out of the car.

  As he stumbled through the door, I caught him with one arm and laughed. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes.” He nodded.

  With a wave to Wayan we walked into the hotel. The heat and exertion of the day had left me feeling a little tired. I sprawled out on the bed as Max placed an order to room service for a late lunch.

  When he sat down on the bed beside me he began to pick at my hair. “Looks like that monkey missed a few things.”

  “Max, stop!” I laughed and swatted at his hand. “Wasn’t that an amazing day?”

  “Amazing isn’t exactly how I’d put it.”

  “You didn’t enjoy it?” I turned over to look at him.

  “I did until Wayan took off.”

  “That was scary.”

  “She should have known better.” He shook his head. “Kids these days don’t have any sense of discipline.”

  I pushed up on my elbows and looked him straight in the eye.

  Chapter 25

  “Max, you’re not serious, are you?”

  “Why wouldn’t I be? She did something she shouldn’t have done and put herself and you in danger. She’s old enough to know better.”

  “Uh—no. She’s not old enough to know anything.” I sighed and dropped back down against the bed. “Kids are special creatures, Max. They don’t have fear, they don’t have hesitation.”

  “They should. That’s the parent’
s job—to teach them healthy fear.”

  “Healthy fear?” I mulled that term in my mind for a few moments, then frowned. “I don’t think there is such a thing.”

  “Sammy, think about it. If she was afraid of what might happen to her, she never would have grabbed onto that vine.”

  “You’re right, she wouldn’t have grabbed onto the vine. If she’s scared of what could go wrong, there are a lot of other things she won’t grab onto either—great adventures that she’ll miss out on in life because of a belief that it’s best to play it safe. We can’t train the adventure out of kids or they become terrified adults.”

  “I don’t think that’s the same thing.”

  “But it is. Why do you think it took me so long to speak up to you about my feelings for you? I was scared—scared of doing something wrong, scared of being rejected, scared of taking a step into the unknown.”

  “I think you’re taking this to a whole different place. My point is that if Wayan knew she was not allowed to do what she did, then she wouldn’t have done it.”

  “I’m sure she did know, Max, but she decided it was worth whatever consequences she might face. It was so important to her that she didn’t even consider not doing it. I saw her. It was an instant decision.”

  “Does that make it better?” He furrowed his brow. “I would never let my kid get away with something like that.”

  I took a breath as the conversation suddenly became very personal.

  “Our kid, don’t you mean? Won’t I get a say in how our child is raised?”

  “A say, yes, but there’s some things that aren’t up for negotiation. I’m all about living a healthy life with an open heart, but kids need boundaries to keep them safe.”

  “You don’t think I’d give those boundaries?”

  “I didn’t say that.”

  “But you’re thinking it.” I pursed my lips as I studied him. “You think I’m too foolish and flighty to parent, don’t you?”

  “Absolutely not.” He stared hard into my eyes. “That’s not what I said at all.”

  “But look at how different our reaction to this situation is. You’re ready to stick little Wayan in the corner and I’m ready to celebrate her adventurous spirit. Don’t you think that’s something we need to figure out?”

  He sighed and tilted his head back against the bed. “No, I don’t. We’re not there yet. One thing I know for sure is that we would both love our child. For now, that’s all we need to know. When we’re actually ready to start a family, we can hash the rest of it out.”

  I fought the urge to argue with him. I wanted him to understand my perspective. But I sensed that the conversation was heading down a heavy path. Max was right. We didn’t need to agree on how to parent just yet. We had plenty of time to discuss it when we got back from the trip, and there was still the possibility that we would decide against it altogether.

  When I’d caught Wayan in my arms, I thought I knew in that split second that I wanted to be a mother. But the moment that Max and I began to squabble over parenting techniques, I was reminded of just how much tension parenthood could create in a relationship.

  After lunch I tried to focus on the book signing.

  Max seemed to be engrossed in a book. Even though neither of us pointed it out, there was a bit of tension between us.

  As I tried to put into words what I wanted to say at the book signing, my mind shifted back to our conversation. I just couldn’t seem to let it go. I turned to look at Max on the bed. “Max.”

  “Hm?” He glanced up from his book.

  “I think we have to talk about this.”

  “No, we don’t.” He looked back at his book.

  “It’s really bugging me.”

  “Sammy, it’s not something we need to discuss right now, and I don’t think it’s a big deal. I’m sure we can come to a compromise.”

  “I don’t want to come to a compromise. I want to raise spirited, adventurous children.”

  “We don’t have children, Sammy.”

  I crossed my arms and stared at him. “I know that, Max. I also know that you’re being very evasive.”

  “I’m not being evasive, I just don’t want to start a conversation about something that we don’t need to discuss right now.”

  “Then when?” I settled back against the bed beside him and looked over at him. “When is a good time?”

  “I don’t know. When we’re closer to taking that next step.”

  “Okay, so in Japan? On our one-year anniversary? When we get back home? Five years from now?”

  “Sammy.”

  “Max.” I locked eyes with him. “I’m telling you that this is important to me, and I know that you’re scared of what it might lead to. I don’t want to argue. I don’t want to put stress or pressure on our relationship, but the truth is if we don’t discuss these big issues then they just get bigger. I don’t want that to happen.”

  “Okay, can I be honest?”

  “You shouldn’t have to ask.”

  “Then I’ll be honest. I think you’re making this into a bigger issue than it needs to be. I feel like you’re baiting me for an argument.”

  “I’m sorry that you feel that way. Why do you?” I scrutinized his expression.

  “Because you’ve already told me that you’re going to raise your kids a certain way—as if they won’t be mine, as if I won’t have a say.”

  “But you said the same thing.”

  “Mine was just a general comment, your statement was very set in stone.”

  “Okay, I can see that.” I lowered my eyes. “You might be right about that.”

  He ran his hand along my shoulder and my upper arm. “It’s not that I don’t want to talk about it right now. But you have a lot on your mind, and I want you to be able to focus on that—so that you don’t get distracted while at the book signing. I know that you really want to get some things across, and I think that maybe you’re using this conversation to distract yourself from preparing what it is you want to say.”

  “Ah, you’re quite perceptive, aren’t you? But it is important to me.”

  “It’s important to me too. That’s why we should start the conversation at a time when we’re both level-headed and we have plenty of time to talk about it without getting defensive.”

  “Are you saying that I’m getting defensive?”

  “Uh…”

  “Okay, maybe I am.” I laughed and kissed his cheek. “You’re right. We can discuss this later. Why don’t we go out for dinner tonight?”

  “I’d like that. I have to be honest, though. I’m craving a cheeseburger.”

  “Max, we’re in Bali.”

  “Okay, fine. A fruit burger?”

  “Hm. I wonder if that’s a thing?”

  “Maybe we could make it a thing.”

  “I bet we could.”

  We spent the rest of our evening on the hunt for a fruit burger. The closest we came was a veggie burger, but it was the best that either of us had ever tasted.

  When I went to sleep that night, the conversation still replayed in my mind. It just bothered me that we had such polar-opposite reactions to the same situation. It was clear that our parenting styles might become an issue, and I wanted to fix it as soon as possible. Max’s point made sense, but I couldn’t get my mind to relax enough to let it go.

  I fell asleep with my mind still spinning.

  Chapter 26

  In the morning I woke to Max making us both a smoothie. I watched him from the bed as he carried it over to me. His lips and jaw were tense as he handed me the cup.

  “I just want to apologize for last night.”

  “Why?” I sat up and took the cup from him. “Thank you for this.”

  “I could have approached the whole thing better, and I shouldn’t have shut you down when you wanted to talk.”

  “I think you were right to push off the conversation. I wasn’t in the right frame of mind for it.”

  “You’re not mad
?” He took a sip of his smoothie.

  “Not at all, Max. I love you. I know whatever differences we might have we’ll find a way to work it out. That’s one thing I don’t question. I will say, though, I’m a little stuck about the book signing tonight. It feels like what I want to say is on the tip of my tongue, but I just can’t get it out.”

  “Hm. Remember I told you to relax?”

  “Yes, but the book signing is tonight.” I took a big swallow of the smoothie.

  “And have you relaxed?” He met my eyes.

  “I guess I haven’t really.”

  “I took care of that for you. I booked you for a massage and yoga session. The studio is right next to the hotel.”

  “Wow, Max, you didn’t have to do that.”

  “Yes, I did. It’s my job to make sure that you’re relaxed. I figured it would be a good way to get your creative juices flowing.”

  “Are you going to join me?”

  “Not this time. I’ve got some work to do on the website, and then I’m meeting Wayan’s husband for lunch. He found me a hamburger.”

  “Oh, you’re so naughty.” I wagged my finger at him.

  “I’ll make it up to you later.” He winked at me.

  “Promise?”

  He leaned close and kissed me. “I promise. Now drink your smoothie. Your appointment is in an hour.”

  As I finished my smoothie I wondered just how long Max had been awake. Was he plagued with concerns about our conversation too?

  “Are you sure you’re okay, Max?”

  “Isn’t that my line?” He smiled as he looked over at me.

  “I mean it. I don’t want you to worry, either.”

  “I’m not, sweetheart. We’re going to be happy, no matter what happens.”

  As much as I believed his words, I couldn’t let go of the notion that he was concerned.

  After I finished my smoothie I decided to set it aside for the moment and do my best to enjoy the special treat Max had prepared for me. I took a long hot shower, then emerged with a better attitude. Max’s gift was perfectly timed. I was sure that after a massage and some yoga I would be more than ready for the book signing that night. I dressed in loose clothing and gave Max a kiss goodbye on the way out the door.