I heard his voice, and my heart played hop-scotch in my chest. The crowd parted, and there he was. My Lucas. His head was tossed back mid-laugh, his blond hair tucked under a backward-facing hat. He wore skin-tight jeans with rips up the legs, a half tucked-in faded tank top and rainbow Vans. My mouth watered. God, he’s beautiful.
Case, Robert and a third man I didn’t recognize were with him. Case noticed me first, and he nudged Lucas, who glanced up and bestowed on me the brightest grin I’d ever seen him give. Pride surged through me. I’d put that smile on his face. No one else. Me. I felt like a goddamn superhero.
He screamed my name and came at me in a full sprint. I dropped the flowers to brace for his arrival and swept him into my arms, nearly losing my balance when he launched himself onto me. He wrapped his legs around my hips and molded his mouth to mine. A few people laughed and whooped, but I didn’t care. I held on for dear life and kissed him until he’d had his fill and he slid to the ground.
“What are you doing here?” Another kiss and he playfully scraped his teeth along my jawline.
“I wanted to pick you up.” I dipped to pick up his roses, brushed a few damaged petals out of the way and handed them to him. “Here. These are for you.”
He brought them to his nose and inhaled. “Thank you. They’re beautiful. You didn’t have to pick me up. Case was gonna drop me off.”
“Oh,” I breathed and struggled to keep the disappointment off my face. Maybe I should have waited for him to call me?
“But I’m so thrilled you did. God, I missed you,” Lucas said with too much alacrity.
“We texted every day.”
Confusion clouded his face, and guilt twisted my gut. I’d been careful to respond to every message, but I couldn’t deny I’d been succinct. I wasn’t trying to be distant, but when I thought about what he was doing, it’d hurt.
“It wasn’t the same.”
“I know. I’m sorry, but I did miss you.”
He nodded, read me and touched my cheek like he needed proof to confirm my presence. Goosebumps peppered my skin. God, I wanted him so much. I shored up my resolve. I would get over my issues.
Case, Robert and the other man waited a respectable distance, watching us. Case took my glance up as permission to approach. Robert followed while the third man lingered behind.
“Well, well. Looks like someone is ecstatic to be home. I trust you no longer need our ride services, Tommy?” Robert asked.
“No. Kyle came to pick me up. Wasn’t that so sweet?”
The third man approached and cleared his throat. “Tommy, would you introduce me to your handsome beau?”
I reached my hand out to introduce myself but Lucas knocked it down. “No way, Ken. Not a word of this on the blog.”
Ken huffed. “Oh, you do know how to ruin my fun. Think of the click bait—Tommy Bruiser has a bona fide sugar daddy.”
All sorts of protective warnings flared in my body. “Now wait a goddamn minute—”
Lucas placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed. “It’s fine, babe. Ken is kidding. He’s a porn blogger, and we have a mutually beneficial self-promoting relationship. He wouldn’t dare aggravate me by publishing personal information without permission, not when I’m so generous to him and grant him exclusive access.”
“An exclusive interview?” Ken’s tone made me think that wasn’t something Lucas—or Tommy, rather—did much. But his perfectly arched eyebrow didn’t budge and neither did his forehead, so I couldn’t be sure.
Man, Botox is some crazy shit.
“Yes, exclusive. But this and him”—Lucas pointed to me—“are off limits.”
“You can mention me,” I said quietly.
Lucas’ eyes bugged out. “What? No, he can’t.”
“Yes. He can. Your fans should know about me—about us. Tell them if you want. I don’t mind.”
Lucas squirmed. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure. But no pictures—at least not of my face. I don’t think any of my coworkers read porn blogs, but that’s still a no…for now.”
Ken regarded us like he’d smile if his face weren’t frozen. “Well then…an interview. A couple interview, perhaps?”
“No,” Lucas answered sharply. “An interview. I mention my boyfriend. No last names and Kyle doesn’t participate.”
I glanced at him, grateful that he understood the limits of my concession. We said our goodbyes and walked together to the car.
“You don’t have to—” Lucas began.
“I know. I want to. If we’re going to be together, I want to share it with the people in our lives. My friends, your friends, our families—even your fans. I don’t want them thinking of you as single and available.”
“For the record, I don’t tell them I’m single or available.”
“Yeah, but you post videos of yourself jerking off.”
Lucas’ jaw fell open, and I grimaced. “That came out harsher than I intended. I joined Twitter. I follow you now.”
“Wait. Are you Bruce R Lover?” Lucas laughed, tucked his bag into the bed of the truck and climbed into the passenger seat.
“Yeah, how’d you know?”
“You liked a shitload of old pictures and videos on all my platforms, but none of the X-rated stuff. I checked out your profile on the plane and saw you only followed me. I thought I had a stalker. Damn, I owe Robert twenty bucks now. He said it was you, but I told him it couldn’t be because my boyfriend doesn’t want to know any details about my porn life.”
I used the exit gate pay station as an excuse to devise any plausible justification for my one-eighty. No good could come of Lucas knowing the truth about my doubts, not once I’d made up my mind that I would find a way to deal with his job. “I’ll pay off your debt.”
“No way. That’s the best bet I’ve ever lost. I love that you follow me. I love your screen name even more. Do you think I could post a video of us, one without your face?”
“Which video doesn’t show my face?”
“The one I recorded before I left of you face-fucking me. I watched it a million times in Vegas—used it to get hard. You can see your dick, but there is nothing that would identify you. It’s crazy hot.”
“No,” I answered sharply then softened my tone. “Those are personal. Speaking of personal, can you not send me videos you take for Tommy? Let’s not blur the lines. When we have sex, that’s for us. When you send me a video or pictures, it’s important that it’s for me. You can take videos for Tommy if you need to, but those aren’t the ones I want.”
Lucas smiled. “Sure thing, baby. My fans are going to flip. I can’t wait to tweet about us. I want to share how fucking happy you make me every damn day.”
I attempted to smile through my heartburn. Why did Lucas care so much what total strangers thought? “Well, let me see if I can one-up myself?”
“What?”
“I’m having a party for Kayla’s brother, and I want you to meet my friends. I want to introduce you to everyone.”
“What if they ask what I do?”
“Tell them whatever you’d like. I can’t say I’m comfortable with it entirely, but I won’t ask you to lie for me. This is what you do. It’s something that I should get used to, and lying about it or asking you to lie about it isn’t fair. I’m proud to be with you. Your job doesn’t change that.”
“Oh my God, who are you right now?”
“I’m trying, Lucas. I want this to work. I love you, and I know I’ve been a little off since we finished the project. I had some things to figure out. Be patient with me.”
“I forgive you, but can you try to talk to me instead of shutting me out? I love you so much. What day is the party?”
“Next Saturday.”
“Oh. In the evening, right?”
“Yeah. Starts around seven.”
“Well, do you think you’d have time to go to lunch with me that day?”
“Sure. Kayla will set up for the party.”
; “Good. It’s my dad’s birthday. I’d like to introduce you to them, too—if you’re okay with that.”
I took a deep breath and threaded my fingers with his on his lap. Touching him comforted me instantly. “I’d love to, baby.”
“Well, now that that is settled, take me to bed, lover. I’ve got a week’s worth of fantasies stored up for you.”
“Oh really?” I laughed. “Care to give me a preview of coming attractions?”
The excruciatingly slow trip made even slower by Lucas’ filthy imagination tormented me with details of what Lucas had planned to do to me in that library.
Chapter Eleven
Lucas’ father did not match the stodgy old former accountant that I’d pictured. On the contrary, he resembled Christopher Lloyd from Back to the Future. He looked nothing like Lucas, which I should have expected since Lucas was adopted, but nevertheless, surprised me. Looking at my own father was always like holding up a mirror set twenty-some years into my future.
Mr. Cass, or Greg, as he’d insisted I call him, greeted me warmly and made excuses for his wife, who apparently ran behind schedule more often than Lucas. We were ushered to the family room, featuring a large, worn leather sectional, a matching well-loved recliner and an expansive fireplace. The tables were full of knick-knacks and pictures of Lucas. Above the mantel, a painted portrait of a three- or four-year-old Lucas in a sailor outfit made me want to ‘aww’ aloud. Instead, I exchanged a look with Lucas to acknowledge how adorable I found it. Lucas blushed, plopped onto the sofa and flipped the footrest lever in a single movement I imagined he’d done a million times before.
Greg smiled broadly as though he’d caught our exchange and took a seat in the recliner across from Lucas. He followed my gaze to the mantel. “We had that painted from one of the pictures the adoption agency had of Lucas when we brought him home. Sit,” Greg prompted me. I took a seat next to Lucas and didn’t resist when he grabbed my hand and dragged it onto his lap.
“So, Lucas, how was Vegas? Mom said you had quite the time.”
Lucas squeezed my hand before he answered. Did he feel me tense? “It was great, Dad. The part is fun, and I’ve got pages of scripted lines in this one. It’s an Ocean’s Eleven parody. We took a bunch of footage running through a casino, and Evan tripped and fell into a fountain. It was hysterical. I’m trying to talk Case into letting me put a blooper reel on YouTube. My fans will die.”
“Well, it’s good that you and Evan are getting along again.”
“Yeah, we’re cool now.” Lucas shot me a pained face.
“The same Evan who I met at the studio? Why weren’t you getting along?” I asked, uncertain I wanted the answer.
“Yeah. We used to date for a minute and a half like a year ago. We’re fine now.”
I tensed again and forced myself to exhale. Lucas shot his dad a panicked look anyone could have interpreted as a warning to change the subject immediately. I squeezed his hand. “It’s fine, Lucas. We both have exes. You’re probably going to meet Matt tonight.”
Greg let out a hearty chuckle. “Oh boy, Kyle. Now you’ve stepped in it. Lucas has a possessive streak—always has. It’s why we never added any more children to our family, Lucas would have put them in a box and sent them back to the orphanage. He couldn’t bear it if he weren’t the sole center of our world. I don’t see him accepting any less from a boyfriend.”
“That’s not true,” Lucas objected.
“What’s not true?” A woman, as beautiful as Lucas but in the completely opposite way, appeared. She was sylphlike, with flowing jet-black hair and beige skin. Asian facial features were easily appreciated, but I couldn’t pinpoint her ancestry. “Hi, darling. Sorry I’m running behind. This must be Kyle. I’m Joann, Lucas’ mom.” Joann approached and I stood then crouched my six-foot frame so she could embrace me.
“Well, aren’t you lovely?” She smiled her approval and patted my chest. “So nice to meet you finally. Lucas hasn’t stopped singing your praises since your first date.”
“Thank you, ma’am. It’s nice to meet you, too.”
“Oh, Joann is fine. Greg, Lucas honey— Did you not offer Kyle a drink?”
“I’ll get it.” Lucas jumped up. “Beer, babe?”
I didn’t usually drink so early in the day, but I accepted. A little alcohol to lubricate the conversation couldn’t hurt, and Greg held a tumbler I suspected contained whiskey. “So”—Joann sat on the arm of her husband’s chair—“tell us about yourself, Kyle.”
I always hated that question. I usually froze, unable to think of a single interesting thing to share and ended up recounting how average I was. Since I wanted Joann to like me, I aimed for a more Lucas-approved answer. “Well, let’s see. Born and raised in California. I work for a custom home builder and go to school part-time at Simmons. I’m spending most of my time now getting to know your son and planning my lake house.”
“A lake house?” Joann’s eyes widened. “That sounds interesting. Do you already have the land?”
Damn, now I sounded lame. “Just planning right now. I haven’t been ready to pull the trigger. I have rough sketches, and I’m researching ideas for custom features that really make it a showcase of my work. I want each room to have something I designed and built myself. Right now, I have so many ideas that it’s hard to stay focused.”
Lucas returned with two beers and handed me one. He beamed at me, which I took as his approval. “Kyle is going to teach me how to work with my hands, so I can help.” He leaned into me and positioned my free arm over his shoulder.
“I offered to teach you to take a proper measurement and use a table saw without losing a finger,” I clarified.
“And cut drywall. For the garage.”
“True,” I said. “Lucas offered to help me finish my garage. It’d be nice to work out there all year-round without space heaters. They make me a little nervous.”
Lucas’ parents smiled their approval, but I worried about the optics. I wasn’t crazy about Greg and Joann getting the impression I wanted to parent Lucas, because, I mean, who would be okay with that? Our age difference already made me self-conscious enough. Lucas’ parents thinking of me as a perverted old man who jerked off to their son’s porn before entrapping him in a relationship was my worst nightmare.
“Well, I’m glad you’ll be learning from an expert. Do you camp, Kyle? Lucas begged us to join the Boy Scouts as a child but I was never comfortable with their Christian slant. Plus, I suspected they wouldn’t welcome Lucas. Even at five or six, he didn’t march to the beat of anyone’s drum but his own. I feared they might try to change him.”
“I camped with my dad and uncles a few times. We’re not big on roughing it, but I like to be outdoors. My dad is a retired mail carrier. I think he liked to spend his leisure time off his feet and out of the elements.”
Greg laughed. “Well I sat at a desk all day, and I would agree.”
We chatted for nearly an hour before Joann served lunch. We shared a pleasant meal full of stories of Lucas’ youth. I genuinely liked Greg and Joann, and we bonded over my shared affection for their son.
Greg wasn’t that different from my own dad—laid-back and a bit on the lazy side, content to let his wife do most of the entertaining. Although Joann and I were virtually the same age, it didn’t seem that way. Perhaps I held an old-fashioned view, but I associated her grace and manner of speech and the way she doted on her husband and Lucas with women of my mother’s generation, rather than my own. The age difference between Greg and Joann really was a non-issue, and their relationship gave me a better understanding of why Lucas remained unconcerned about ours.
After our meal, Lucas showed me around his old neighborhood, including a walk up to his elementary school.
“Swing with me.” Lucas chuckled, then plopped down and pumped his legs.
I sized up the playset and the worn metal chains that secured the plastic seat to the fasteners. “My ass is too big for that.”
“Is no
t,” he said and stuck his tongue out to express his displeasure.
“Brat.” I sat gingerly on the swing next to him and swayed back and forth without letting my feet leave the ground.
“Maybe I want you to spank me, Daddy,” he teased and pumped his legs even higher, swinging like a pendulum.
“Save it for the bedroom, Lucas. This setting is…” I regarded our surroundings and shivered. “You’ll make me feel like a perv.”
“So, I can’t talk you into fucking me on this playground. It’d be fun.”
“Pretty sure I’m not getting turned on here.”
“How about my old room?”
“Nope. Not if your parents are home.”
“But I’m horny.”
I huffed. “You’re always horny.”
“Seeing you at my parent’s house, having lunch with them… They loved you. They wanted me to find someone to take care of me, and they know you will.”
“I’m not trying to adopt you, Lucas.”
“I know. That’s not what I meant. Did I tell you my mom’s half-Vietnamese?” He swung past me again, facing dead ahead.
“No. I don’t think you mentioned it, but I thought she might have some Asian roots. Are you close to that side of your family?”
Lucas shook his head. “My grandparents were white. She’s adopted too.”
“Oh, wow. It’s cool you have that in common.”
“Three years ago, she found her biological family and she wants to spend some time over there. They plan to go—her and my dad.”
A small change in Lucas’ voice set the hairs on the back of my neck on end. “That’s nice. Why’d she wait?”
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