Guardian's Grace
Page 10
“When my father died, I watched my mother fade away. There’s a fourth way to kill a Paenitentia, Otto. My mother died of a broken heart. She’d been dying little by little from the day she was mated. My father’s death just finished her off.
“I’ll never make a woman suffer the way my mother did. I’ve never stayed with any woman long enough to grow attached. I made sure I never fell in love.” Until now.
“If you won’t have her, what kind of life will Grace have here?” Otto asked, his temper rising.
“One that’s safe.”
“Or one that’s a prison. She’s already feeling trapped. She needs to be free, to go out in the world, to do whatever it is young women do.”
“She didn’t do that before she came here.”
“She didn’t have a choice!” Otto slammed his hand down on the coffee table so hard that the pictures on the wall jumped. “You’re letting your personal feelings get in the way of your judgment. Manon may be able to help her and you can’t stand it. Fine. Come up with a better idea, because keeping Grace locked up here isn’t going to work. You’re so quick to point out that we’re not monks, but you have no qualms about consigning Grace to a celibate life cleaning and cooking for men you’ll never let her have. She’s young and beautiful, warm and loving. She deserves more than this.” He was on his feet, fists in the air as if ready to strike. “If you won’t let her see Manon and you’re not willing to offer her more than this…” He picked up a stack of magazines and threw them across the room. “Then at least step back and open the door for someone else to give her the life you refuse to.”
The thought of Grace with another man was like a knife to his gut. Another man’s hands working their way along her body, another man’s mouth where his mouth belonged, another man drinking in the sound of her laughter and the look in her eyes… The knife twisted and the slow burn from it spread through his body. He turned away from Otto as he felt his face harden and his fangs begin to emerge. This was not going to happen to him. This was not going to be a part of his life. Who was he kidding? It was already a part of his life. He would not throw out everything he believed for some pretty piece of ass. His breath caught on the shame of his thought. He’d take another man down for calling her that. He shut his eyes and forced his mind to go blank, centering himself and pulling back the rage. He was disgusted with himself for breaking an oath and angry with Otto for making him face emotions he didn’t want to feel. When he had his mind centered and could breathe normally, he spoke in a voice that sounded flat and tight, but Otto could hear the fury beneath.
“What do you want me to do? What do you want me to say? Maybe you’re right. Let’s give Grace to Dov. He could keep her entertained in bed and she could keep him out of trouble. It’s a win-win. Everyone will be happy.” Everyone but him.
*****
Grace gave a last tug to straighten her sports bra and grabbed the old t-shirt she wore when she worked out. Hopefully Canaan was through in the gym and she could avoid any awkward moments. Working through her list of evening chores had quieted her worries about the twins and Uncle Otto, but increased her anxiety over how to act around Canaan. Should she act as if nothing had happened? Should she talk to him about what she wanted and what she was feeling? She had no experience in matters of the heart and there was no one to ask.
She thought about calling Alice then rejected the idea. The old Alice would have been full of advice, but that Alice was no longer there. Grace had called twice over the past few weeks using Col’s cell phone, but their conversation had been uncomfortable and stilted. She couldn’t say anything about her new life and Alice no longer had any life at all. She missed her old friend more than ever.
On her way down the stairs, she made up her mind. She would simply continue with her evening routine. After her chores were done, she always went to the gym and following a warm up sometimes asked Uncle Otto or one of the twins to spar. She would do the same tonight. She rounded the corner under the stairs and stopped at the door of the Back Room. Canaan’s voice slapped the smile from her face.
“Let’s give Grace to Dov. He could keep her entertained in bed and she could keep him out of trouble. It’s a win-win. Everyone will be happy.”
Her hand flew to her mouth as a choked cry escaped. The two men stared at her, eyes wide, mouths open. Each reached out a hand.
“Grace,” they said in unison.
She didn’t wait to hear more. With another cry, she turned and ran down the hall and through to the kitchen. She hit the heavy door to the gym with enough force to send it crashing back against the wall and then she was fumbling blindly for the latch above the mats that would open the door to her escape. She couldn’t see. She couldn’t hear. She couldn’t breathe. But her feet kept moving and her arms kept pumping. She couldn’t have stopped if she wanted to. Out of the alley, down Hayden Avenue and across Park Street she ran, the words in her head matching the steady slap of her shoes against the uneven pavement. Maybe you’re right. Maybe you’re right. Give her to Dov. Give her to Dov. It’s a win-win. It’s a win-win. She cried out in agony and continued to run. Her toe found a tree root that sent her sprawling. Without thought to the blood that now seeped from her knees, she picked herself up and continued to run. Broken sidewalks. Broken streets. Broken houses. Broken hearts.
A group of people were on the corner diagonal from her and their catcalls and whistles caught her attention. She veered left and continued to run, stumbling now, but still unable to stop. Another left at the next corner and she buckled over from the pain in her side. Hands on her knees, she gasped for air and gulped back her tears. She heard voices coming from the street she’d just left and she hurried on, her hand pressing against the stitch in her side.
In one fell swoop she’d gone from housekeeper to housewhore. Canaan cared for her, all right, like a dog owner cared for a bitch in heat. Poor, crazy Grace is getting horny. Now who can we get to scratch that itch? Let’s assign it to Dov. Everyone will be happy. She was limping now and could hardly see for the tears.
She recognized the corner near the park and headed for the entrance. She chose a table deep in the shadows of the trees and hoisted herself up to sit cross legged on the top where she rested her hands on her knees and took two deep, cleansing breaths. She felt the buzz in her head from the people who had been walking behind her on the last block. Men, she realized, slightly drunk or a little high on something else. She heard their raucous laughter when one of them made a crude joke as they passed by the arched gateway.
She threw her head back and looked up through the branches of the trees to the night sky. How stupid could one woman be? One smack on the lips, one crack on the ass and she thought all was right with the world. Canaan cared for her. Canaan thought she was sexy. Canaan would take care of everything. Sure. He’d just tie up her hot and aching body in a big red bow and hand her off to Dov to satisfy her needs. Dov, the Paenitentian equivalent of a Golden Retriever who would happily bed any female that happened to be in heat. Everyone will be happy. Canaan’s voice. Canaan’s words. Grace let her head fall forward and she moaned aloud. Then the faint buzzing in her head became a sharp whine.
“Here chickie, chickie. Come moan for me,” said a voice from the darkness.
“You know you want it, baby. Come see what Leon’s got for you,” a second voice called.
Other voices followed with jeers and crude noises. There were four of them, no, five, coming through the hedges by the basketball courts. If she ran for the archway, they would cut her off. The buzzing in her head became a chain saw ripping through her brain. She stayed still as stone, hoping they would lose her in the darkness.
“I see you, chickie, chickie. A little chicken dinner waiting on my table. But I think you got it wrong, chickie, ‘cause it’s you who’s gonna eat me.”
Everything the twins had taught her went scurrying through her mind, darting in and out amidst the ravaging pain. She remembered Dov and Col telling her that if you knew
what you were doing then the fight wasn’t scary. They lied. This was scarier than hell. She slowly uncrossed her legs and stepped down from the table. Her eyes wanted to close against the noise and the pain and her hands wanted to grip the sides of her head to keep it from blowing apart, but she kept her eyes open and her hands at her side.
When the leader was close enough, she turned as if to run and just as Col had taught her, the leader took the bait. When he lunged for her she whirled, using the force of her body to drive the palm of her left hand outward and upward into his nose. His head snapped back with a sickening crunch. Her right hand seemed to move of its own accord as it grabbed her attacker’s shoulder to continue the backward momentum of the blow to the nose and sent him sprawling over the foot she hooked at the back of his knee. She had a moment’s surprise that the move really worked and then another attacker was there to take his place. She spun again, striking with her extended foot, not to the chest as he expected but to his extended knee. The knee snapped back and she heard the crack as he screamed in agony. The pain in her head was explosive. Her hands went to her ears and came away wet. Blood? She had no time to think before another grabbed her from behind. She drove her elbow into his throat, but they were too many and the chainsaw in her head had finally done its job. Blinding light exploded in her mind. A fist connected with her jaw and she felt herself being tackled to the ground. Someone straddled her waist and tore at her shirt but nothing they did could be worse than the tortuous eruption in her mind. Grace screamed and screamed and screamed.
Chapter 16
Canaan stared at the empty doorway as if sheer force of will could turn back time, bring Grace back to the doorway and seal his fucking mouth shut before he shattered that lovely smile and those shining eyes with his words. The look on her face and her cry of anguish had come back tenfold to shatter his heart. He felt Otto’s fist slam into his shoulder.
“There are a lot of things I regret about being old and turned, but right now the thing I regret most is no longer being strong enough to kick your ass.” Otto’s voice boiled with rage.
“Is this what you wanted? Does this fix your problem? Comforting her one minute and whoring her out the next?”
“You know I didn’t mean what I said.” He’d said it to piss off Otto, not to hurt Grace.
“I don’t count. She does, and she only knows what she heard.” Otto shouted. He picked up his glass and slammed it back down. “Goddammit, Canaan, stop standing there like a lost child and go find her. And when you do, you tell her the truth. Tell her that your oaths and traditions mean more than her happiness, that you don’t want to love her but you don’t have the guts to let her go. Tell her that I was worth breaking with tradition but she’s not. Tell her you’d rather keep her a prisoner in ignorance than give her the chance to find out who she truly is because falling in love with a human isn’t the worst thing that can happen, is it?”
“Enough, old man,” Canaan roared, “Enough!” He stormed from the room and headed for the stairs. “You don’t know what I think or what I feel,” he threw back over his shoulder.
Otto slowly lowered himself into a chair. With his elbows on the table, he rubbed his temples with his fingers. “Oh yes I do, my lord,” he whispered. “Oh yes I do.”
*****
Most of the sites she’d looked at on the internet suggested that one shouldn’t use the board alone, but Andi didn’t see the point. It was only a kid’s toy, right? Made for spooky fun. She’d read first person accounts, some positive, some negative, but none of it seemed like anything she couldn’t handle and if something creepy came, she’d just say good-bye and it would have to go. With the planchette in her hand, she was in charge, not the blonde bitches or the shitty-grinned Cyn-thi-a. She, Andi, was in control.
And it seemed as if she might be on to something. The last few times she had used the board, something had been there. After answering a few simple yes or no questions, it had asked her name and she had spelled it out, A-N-D-I. After all, what’s in a name? She had asked for its name and the board had spelled out S-E-C-R-E-T. After a few more questions to which it would only answer yes or no, the board had clearly spelled out B-L-A-C-K-C-A-N-D-L-E-S and after a pause, M-I-R-R-O-R and then it was gone.
Andi was captivated by the possibilities and she’d purchased six black candles the very next day.
Now they were lit in front of the mirror and she sat cross legged in the center of the room with the coffee table pulled close. The online directions said she should think happy thoughts before she began so she thought of the blonde bitches growing fat, their over bleached hair sticking out from their heads in dry, brittle tufts. She pictured dear Cynthia getting caught in the act, sucking Mr. Cappaletti’s dick while the horrified Mrs. looked on. Happy, happy, happy thoughts.
Andi swallowed down her glass of wine, set her fingers lightly on the planchette and waited for something to happen. She had all night.
*****
Buffy was sitting halfway up the stairs and as soon as she saw Canaan she rose, arched her back and hissed.
“I don’t have time for this,” Canaan hissed back. He tried to push the tiny cat aside with his foot, but Buffy was having none of it. She leapt to a higher perch, hissed again and began to pace back and forth across the step like a tiny tiger in its cage. Canaan took three stairs in a single step and left the annoying creature behind.
Christ, even the cat was pissed. And the twins would be likewise when they found out what he had done. Dammit, this was his House and that woman had waltzed in and completely taken over. She ran the place like a well oiled machine and it wasn’t just the cooking and cleaning. When she’d found the laptop in his study and asked if she could use it, he’d thought she’d wanted it for keeping household accounts but the next thing he knew she had designed a program to track their patrols, sightings and encounters and devised a way to cover their territory more efficiently. She even suggested that they find a way to use the secret websites that many of the members used to stay in touch to advertise for possible trainees.
He tossed off his shorts and grabbed a pair of jeans, jammed his legs into them and threw on a shirt. All right, he admitted it. A lot of her ideas had merit. Dov and Col had certainly settled down under her influence and hadn’t they all felt a bit stupid when she brought Otto’s thirst so easily under control. Maybe he was so set in his ways that he’d fallen behind the times.
He stuffed his feet into his boots and laced them up. All that was true, but one thing had nothing to do with the other. Otto was wrong about it being a matter of tradition.
Regardless of the old man’s suspicions, Grace was probably human. Many members of the Race, both male and female, had played with humans since time began. They kept them as acquaintances and sometimes lovers, but never for long. Aside from the secrecy, the consequences were too great. How painful would it be to lose a human you loved after so few years? How painful for them to grow old while you stayed young?
Buffy was still snarling at the top of the stairs when Canaan left his room.
“Get out of the way, dammit it. I’ve got to find Grace.”
The cat made a small “mew” and bounded down the stairs. At the bottom, she looked back over her shoulder as if to see if he were paying attention. Intrigued, Canaan followed.
Buffy led him directly to the alley door and when he opened it, the cat darted through. Canaan made a grab for her, but missed and he could have sworn that she rolled her eyes at him as if he were the one wasting time. He chased her into the alley and she seemed to move with a purpose, staying several feet ahead of him, looking back to see if he would follow. To his knowledge, the cat had never been outside before nor had it appeared to want to. He had to believe that the cat knew where Grace was and would lead him to her.
Down the alley and left onto Hayden Avenue, Canaan felt a bit of a fool following a cat, but when the screaming started, he no longer thought of fools or cats. White light gathered around him and he ran.
Canaan’s night keen eyes immediately took in the scene; one attacker straddling a screaming Grace with his fist in the air, ready to strike, three circled to watch and one rolling on the ground howling with pain.
He lost the white light before he attacked. These were humans and he didn’t need anything extra to take them down. He was going to enjoy taking his time. He wanted to kill them, but he would not. He wanted them to remember the pain.
He charged the one on top of Grace, the leader, he assumed, backhanding him, crushing an already broken nose and sending him flying into one of the watchers. He turned on the two left standing. His fists flew, pounding into them, never giving either a chance to strike back. When they were beaten and staggering, he twisted their arms behind their backs until he heard the satisfying snap of bone and rammed their heads together hard enough that they would both feel the concussion for weeks to come. The two who had fallen were up and charging.
Canaan leapt, struck the first with both feet to the chest and felt the ribs give way. He smiled viciously at the scream and kept smiling when he drove the leader to the ground. Canaan straddled the leader the same way the leader had straddled Grace and he placed his thumb on the human’s forehead.
“You will remember what happened here, but you will not tell.” Canaan’s voice was quiet and cold. “You will leave this neighborhood and you will never return. If I see you or hear of you, I will kill you.” Then he slammed his hand forward hard enough to knock the human out.