I was mortally offended. ‘No, India, it was nothing to do with me. It was actually something to do with Marnie. They were together when he was leaving, remember?’
She sighed. ‘No, I can’t. Oh yes, I do. Perhaps I’ve caught dementia or something. They do say alcohol knocks off brain cells, don’t they? Or was that cigarettes? So did those Army veterans get off?’
‘They did. They were all herded on to a huge coach with their seven tons of luggage and were off to tour Eastern Canada and look for fast food. Have you heard from Jerry by the way?’ I said offhandedly, hoping it would distract her long enough so I could find the perfect outfit for the evening. Normally bringing up Jerry started a fifteen-minute monologue at least.
‘WhatsApp,’ she said, looking a little dreamy. ‘And an email he forwarded from the florist accompanied by a rambling, panicking message. Though what he thinks I’m going to do about the merits of Peace roses versus something else that might or might not be available in December when I’m mid-Atlantic I don’t know.’
That was short, so I went with the blunt approach.
‘Right, I need to start getting ready and decide what I’m going to wear. Dress or trousers? You’re good at this sort of thing; I need your advice.’
India loved being asked for her advice and she thought about it. ‘Dress.’
‘Blue patterned or the pink linen one?’
‘Blue – the other one will crease like mad if you’re sitting down all evening. And if you spill anything on it, it will look rubbish, whereas on the blue one it won’t show. And then when you put it back on in the morning, it won’t look like a limp rag, which the pink one will.’
‘India! What do you mean, put it on in the morning? I’m going to have dinner with him and that’s all. I’m going to be sophisticated and witty and charming. I’m not going to spill anything down myself. I’m not going to sleep with him!’
‘Really?’ she asked airily, as if she knew something I didn’t.
‘Yes, really!’
‘I thought you fancied him?’
‘I do, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to drop my crushed, food-splattered, pink linen dress on his bedroom floor.’
‘More fool you then. He’s in the next-door cabin, isn’t he? I’ll bang on the wall if you make too much noise and keep me awake.’
‘India, just shut up for once. I’m nervous enough as it is. I’m not going to keep you awake because I’m not going to sleep with him.’
‘If you say so.’
‘Oh, shut up!’
‘You shut up.’
I got my revenge by locking myself in the bathroom, having a long shower, doing my make-up in front of the illuminated mirror and ignoring my sister’s desperate pleas for the loo. It almost felt like old times. I started singing.
*
At seven-thirty-one I arrived at the atrium where I had agreed to meet Gabriel. I thought I’d play it cool, keep him waiting and arrive late, but in the end I couldn’t do it. Instead of strolling slowly to the lifts and arriving in a calm and collected state, I almost trotted there and was a bit out of breath.
‘You didn’t have to rush,’ he said. ‘I knew you wouldn’t be caught in traffic or anything.’
I laughed and tossed my hair a bit, wondering if he would notice I had been messing about with my heated rollers. In the restaurant an Asian girl in a silk robe greeted us. She was really tiny, like a child playing at dressing up. I’d read about size-zero people but never actually seen one in the insubstantial flesh before. I bet she could wear Ladybird clothes if they still made them. I felt like a hippopotamus next to her. She did a lot of charming bowing and smiling and then led us to our table and brought iced water and menus.
‘What would you like?’ Gabriel asked as he glanced at the menu.
I pretended to study mine very hard so that I didn’t stare at him any more than I had already. He was looking particularly handsome in a dark blue shirt and chinos. What on earth was he doing with me in my Primark dress and ASOS shoes?
‘Um, I don’t know really. I mean I like Thai food – well, everyone likes Thai food, don’t they? But I’m not – well, I don’t know what the dishes are called. I mean Pad Thai, is that something? Thai? Um?’
Yes, my campaign to be sophisticated, witty and charming had got off to a great start.
‘Is there anything I can help you with?’ He leant forward and I could smell his aftershave, or maybe that was just him. Oh God.
I clutched the menu card and brought it up almost to my nose so my mind didn’t wander on the topic of things Gabriel Frost could help me with.
‘I like noodles and green curry,’ I said, dredging my memory banks for things I could say about Thai cuisine without looking a complete prat. ‘Look, perhaps you could order for both of us. I like it hot and spicy.’
Oh, what was I saying?
And let him order for me?
I must have been in a biddable mood.
Never in my life have I allowed a man to order for me, not even when Chris (who had an A-level in French) and I were in France and my bloody-minded attitude meant I ordered a whole boiled crab on a bed of spinach and raw garlic by mistake.
Anyway, I handed back my menu with a calm smile to the tiny waitress and waited to see what would arrive. The first thing to materialise was a bottle of champagne swiftly followed by some tiny canapés.
‘I hope you don’t mind; I love champagne and I thought it might be nice to celebrate,’ Gabriel said.
What are we celebrating?
‘Lovely,’ I said.
Think calm thoughts. Don’t say it, don’t say it.
‘What are we celebrating?’
Duh.
‘The wedding perhaps,’ he said.
‘The wedding? Crumbs, I’d almost forgotten about that,’ I said.
Gabriel laughed.
‘God, you fascinate me,’ he said, holding out his glass to chink against mine.
‘I do?’
He laughed. ‘You seem so calm most of the time, very together. And then out of the blue you say something crazy like that. It’s beguiling.’
Beguiling. That sounded very sophisticated and chic. Not like me at all.
I gave a small, modest laugh and sipped my champagne.
You can’t do both and I choked a bit as the champagne went down the wrong way. I gulped hard to keep the choking to myself. Then of course I realised how klutzy I was being and wanted to laugh. I took another sip of champagne and calmed down.
‘So where do you usually live?’ I asked.
‘I spend a lot of time in New York at the moment, but my base is London. I never seem to be in the same place for very long. I have two daughters from my marriage. They live most of the time with Elsa in London. They visit me at my apartment in New York or we meet up at my parents’ house in their school holidays. It’s not ideal but we make it work.’
Elsa. That sounded a bit Scandinavian, didn’t it?
‘How old are they?’
‘Beatrice is ten and Amelie is eight.’
‘Lovely names.’
I mentally chewed over the next question I could ask him.
Why did you get divorced?
What does Elsa do?
I didn’t have to try. Gabriel wanted to tell me.
‘I spent too much time on my career. Elsa found someone new. It was as simple as that. We were civilised about it.’ He shook his head. ‘Let’s be honest, it was awful. But we’re doing our best for the girls. It’s the most important thing after all.’
We carried on investigating the little dishes of appetisers for a few tense minutes. But I’m not one to leave a silence unfilled for long.
‘You mentioned earlier that you were leaving the ship and then you didn’t. What changed your mind?’
He looked at me with his beautiful grey eyes, clear as water.
‘You did.’
What? I thought it had something to do with Marnie – but me? Well …
�
�I did? How? I mean what happened?’
He looked down and moved his cutlery an infinitesimal amount.
‘I’ve had some of the most difficult months of my life. One day I might tell you about it. And you made me laugh when I seriously thought I’d never laugh again. And the next night, when I went out on to the deck to escape the masked ball, I started to think about you.’
Oh God, I think I’m going to pass out.
Here on the floor. Right this minute.
I’m going to go all limp and slide down under the table, dragging the tablecloth and all the cutlery with me.
‘I realised you were different from any other woman I’d ever met. And then suddenly you were there. Standing in front of me. I couldn’t stop myself; I had to kiss you. It was unforgivable, but I hope you can forgive me?’
‘Sure.’ I meant this to come out as a confident laugh, but it sounded like a croak.
After all this sort of thing happened to me all the time.
Bloody hell.
‘That’s okay then.’
The waitress came back and Gabriel ordered some dishes while I twirled my champagne flute, nearly dropped it and stared out of the window at the darkening sea. The girl gave him a rather flirty look from under her lashes and went away with a demure smile.
‘So this meal is by way of an apology.’
Colour me confused.
‘Apology for what?’
He tilted his head at me, his eyes dancing in the candlelight making me feel all bubbly all over again. ‘Have you been listening to a word I’ve said?’
‘Some of them.’
The rest of the time I’ve been remembering what it was like to kiss you.
‘I shouldn’t have done it. I had no right to.’
‘To what?’
‘To kiss you.’
‘Oh that! I didn’t mind! I mean –’
At that moment the waitress returned with an even tinier and cuter companion and several pretty porcelain dishes filled with more food. Some of it was spicy, some was slightly sour, and all of it was delicious. All hope of finding out just what Gabriel meant disappeared as he told me all about a trip he’d taken to Thailand some years ago. As we ate he talked about the street food and described the white beaches and clear blue seas he remembered. It sounded wonderful.
I could just imagine us, walking along the edge of the sea, hand in hand as the sun set in a blaze of crimson and gold. I would be wearing a white linen kaftan over a bikini because I would have lost two stone and been to the gym twice a day for a year. Gabriel would be bare-chested and rippling with muscles and there would be candles glowing in the warm dusk and possibly a four-poster bed draped with white silk curtains at the end of the beach where we would –
‘And all the details sorted out? I’m told these things can take a lot of planning.’
I lurched back into the present.
‘Yes, yes,’ I said, trying to latch on to what he had been saying. Honestly, I have the attention span of a beetle sometimes. ‘What things?’
‘The flower girls? You said they were still growing?’
‘Oh, them. Yes, they are. I think I’ll have to ask their mother to sort them out. She’s my cousin.’
‘So. This is an exciting time?’
‘Well, yes it is. I can’t wait to cross the Atlantic.’
Gabriel frowned. ‘I meant the wedding. It must be exciting for you.’
‘Exciting? The wedding? Gosh, no, not particularly; it’s just a lot of list making and nagging people at the moment. I’ll be glad when it’s over to be honest. I mean it’s been dragging on for a year; it will be nice to talk about something else for a change.’
‘Oh, I see. Well, that’s refreshing I suppose. What does the lucky groom do?’
‘Jerry? He’s a barrister and goes to London a lot for expense-account dinners with judges, but I only ever see him eating Pot Noodle or playing on his gaming console and shooting people. He’s very funny and terrifically kind but I think he would drive me mad eventually. He never takes the bins out in time, or gets his car serviced until the engine is smoking, and then he thinks it can be fixed by shouting at it. And it’s the devil’s own job to get him to make a decision about anything. Do you want more coffee, Jerry? Oooh, now I’m not entirely sure. Possibly. I could shake him sometimes.’
Gabriel shook his head. ‘So why do you want to marry him?’
I blinked at him. ‘I don’t want to marry him.’
‘But you’re getting married on December 2nd. Don’t you think you should tell him he’s driving you mad?’
The penny dropped with a loud clanging noise, like a hammer in a metal bucket. I felt quite giddy.
‘I’m not marrying him. India is.’
‘I thought this was your hen weekend?’ Gabriel looked confused. It was just as adorable as I had imagined.
‘Yes, it is. For India,’ I explained. ‘India and Jerry are getting married on December 2nd. I’m the bridesmaid and list compiler.’
‘So you’re not getting married?’
‘No.’ I almost shouted it. ‘No,’ I added a bit more quietly.
‘And you’re not engaged? You don’t have a significant other?’
‘No. I did have a significant other but he turned out to be an insignificant other who was shagging the Avon lady.’
He spluttered with laughter and dabbed at his mouth with his napkin, while I wondered just why I had brought that up. But somehow the painful memory was subsiding and I giggled a little too.
‘What?’
‘Forget I said that.’ I was blushing now.
‘Okay. I’ll try.’ But he winked at me and I felt myself go even redder as I tried not to burst out laughing. He’d thought I was engaged; he’d thought I was getting married!
‘And the plans for the wedding are going well, by the way,’ I said, looking to change the subject as I marvelled at how well this date was turning out. ‘The dress, flowers, cake and other stuff are all booked. India is getting married in the village church. She wanted a marquee in the garden at home for the reception but that’s madness in December so it’s at The Manor House down the road from my parents’. I think it will be really lovely.’
‘And where are they going on honeymoon?’
‘I’ve no idea. Jerry is supposed to be sorting that but he’s so indecisive and forgetful they’ll probably end up going to Blackpool.’
Gabriel looked thoughtful. And then he reached across the table and put his hand over mine.
‘So if I said I wanted to kiss you again, you wouldn’t object?’
He was stroking the back of my hand with his thumb and I thought I was going to faint.
‘You knew it was me last night?’ I asked quietly.
He looked up, surprise flickering in his eyes. ‘Of course I knew it was you!’
‘Oh. Only I had the mask on and it was very dark …’
Gabriel kissed my fingers. ‘I knew it was you, Alexa.’
I tell you what, I’d heard the phrase a bolt of desire shot through her but I’d never felt one before. It was exactly like an electric shock. I wouldn’t have been surprised to see sparks coming off the ends of my fingers or a smoking patch on the tablecloth under my hand.
I couldn’t think of much else to say after that, and that’s really not me at all. I mean I can talk 24/7 on occasions, but this had sort of struck me dumb.
We finished our meal and the tiny waitresses fluttered around us like bright butterflies but we hardly saw them. At least I didn’t. Gabriel took my hand and led me out on to the promenade deck and into the fresh evening air. He found two chairs in a quiet corner that had rugs on them as a defence against the chill and brought us two large glasses of something fiery and aromatic. It might have been brandy. God knows what it was, but it was good.
We sat very close together watching the foam of the ship’s wake disappearing into the darkness behind it and he took my hand and kissed the tips of my fingers again until I thought I rea
lly was going to swoon, and I’m not the swooning type.
I could see the lights of some coastal town growing faint as the ship steered away from land and headed out towards the wide expanse of the Atlantic ahead of us. Coming up were six days of the crossing that would take us back to Southampton and real life.
Meanwhile, as I sat feeling the chills of excitement running up and down my spine, I came to a decision: I was going to do this. I was going to go for it.
Whatever ‘it’ was.
If Gabriel was attracted to me, why would I pretend I didn’t feel the same way? And Marnie Miller? Well, what about her? We were all adults here. Marnie already had the perfect husband, didn’t she?
Chapter Thirteen
Hot Passion
Vodka, Passion Fruit Liqueur, Cranberry Juice, Orange Juice
We sat there for some time and didn’t really speak much. Occasionally we saw a boat far out to sea with its lights twinkling. Other people were walking along the promenade deck, taking the air, perhaps enjoying the thought that we were all at the start of something new.
The ship had stocked up on more wine and ducks and jam or whatever was needed, we were all safely on board and we had cast off the ropes from the quayside. It was rather symbolic. The ship was setting off on an adventure and so was I.
‘I’ll never forget this moment,’ I said, and I turned to look at him, at the symmetry of his beautiful face.
‘Why particularly?’ I could hear the laughter in his voice.
‘Because I know what’s going to happen; what I want.’
He leaned over, pushed my hair to one side and kissed my neck. ‘I know what I want,’ he said, his voice very low. ‘I want you. I want to touch you.’
He looked at me and I smiled. ‘That’s what I want too.’
Suddenly he stood up, pulling me to my feet, and held me against him, his hands on my waist. ‘Are you sure, Alexa? Are you really sure?’
I nodded. ‘Oh yes.’
His breath was warm on my cheek and he kissed me, a dozen kisses as light as feathers along my cheekbone until he whispered in my ear, ‘Oh, Alexa.’
We walked back into the warmth of the ship and along the corridor to the lifts almost in a dream. He waited until we could get into one on our own and as the doors closed he turned to me and pushed me back against the mirrored wall. And God, he kissed me.
Come Away With Me Page 14