Behind the Scenes
Page 18
“Where to begin?”
AJ froze. Now he was hearing things. Even Timmy Chang sounded like Tanya.
He looked up. Imagine that. Timmy Chang even looked like Tanya. Lucky kid.
Only Timmy wasn’t waving cartons of Chinese in his face. He was waving a white flag.
“Tanya?”
“Last time I checked.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I want to talk.”
“Okay.”
“With you.”
“Okay.”
“Mind if I come in, or would you like to close the door and have me talk through the keyhole?”
“Oh. I’m sorry, yeah come in.”
“Are you all right?”
“I will be, in about fifty years, if I start drinking heavily.”
“Looks like you’re getting a good head start already. You’re drunk!”
“I wish. Unfortunately, I don’t get drunk.”
“That’s too bad. You sure do a mean impression though.”
“Thank you. I think.”
“Are you going to step aside and let me in or not?”
“Just promise me one thing.”
“I’ll try. What?”
“Promise me you’ll never, ever do drugs.”
“Okay . . . does aspirin count?” she asked, directing a confused smile at him.
“No. Aspirin’s okay.”
“Great. Then I promise. Now move it.”
He stepped back and almost tripped. “Oh, my God, I think I might be drunk.”
“No. Ya think?”
“Tanya?”
“Yes?”
“I know you need to talk and I know I owe it to you to listen. But would you mind if I just took a quick nap? Fifteen, twenty minutes tops. I don’t want to talk to you drunk.”
“It’s a deal. Can I stay and eat whatever is going to be delivered while you sleep?”
“My shrimp is your shrimp.”
“Oh, how many ways could I respond to such a line? Way too many to count. Unfortunately, they’d be lost on you right now.”
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t expect you or I wouldn’t have drunk.”
“It’s all right. People do drink. Come on. Let’s get you to the couch.”
“Will you sit with me?”
“I’ll do one better. I’ll let you lie in my lap.”
She sat down and patted her lap. “Come on, big boy.”
He dropped like an anchor, and she pulled him down. “Stretch out, AJ.”
“Tanya?”
“Yes.”
“I love you.”
WHEN AJ WOKE up there was a hammer pounding his forehead. He felt around to orient himself before cracking open his eyes, so he wouldn’t be surprised by whatever he found.
Sniffing, he detected the scent of his home and Tanya. He’d know her scent anywhere. That was enough right there to make his eyes whip open.
“Ouch,” he whispered.
“Hi, idiot,” Tanya said, just a little too cheerfully.
He struggled to sit up. “How long have I been asleep?”
“About an hour. Here.”
She reached over to the coffee-table, then handed him a small glass of water and two aspirin.
“Bless you,” he said, then took them, draining the glass.
“What is the matter with you?” she said, and already she sounded angry. She didn’t even need time to wind up. Of course, she’d probably been stewing the entire hour.
“Would you mind if I go splash water on my face and brush my teeth?”
“Yes, please. Gargle, too. That wasn’t ginger ale you were pounding.”
He got up and headed to his bedroom. Dammit! He looked like hell and he probably stunk of liquor—and she had no doubt been hopping mad even before she’d rung the bell.
He’d love to take a shower, but there was only so much waiting he could make an angry female handle before she started breaking things. Over his head.
When he felt halfway decent, he returned to the living room and sat down, facing her and the music. “I’m an idiot. I’m so sorry.”
“What the hell were you thinking, AJ?”
“It was a bad day all around and since I don’t get drunk—”
She snorted.
He ignored that. “—I just thought I’d have a drink.”
“Or five.”
“Two, actually. I’m a cheap date.”
“Who can’t hold his liquor.”
He couldn’t argue that one. “I’m sorry. I thought that was a private act of stupidity. I didn’t know you’d be coming over.”
“We did have tentative plans.”
“But I was being a jerk and you didn’t want to be with me if I was a jerk, so I figured you’d rather do just about anything else.”
He stood up. He might get drunk fast, but he sobered up just as quickly. And he was stone-cold sober right now. Looking forward to facing Tanya’s disgust helped.
“Why don’t we just get this out of the way?” he said. “I’m sorry for everything. Does that about cover it?” She sat silently for a while, until he couldn’t stand it and looked over at her. “Well?”
“That depends on your definition of everything. I wasn’t born ten years ago. I don’t accept blanket apologies until I see the blanket.”
“Of course not.”
He sat down heavily and faced her straight on. She’d always given him that. It was the least he could give her in return. “This is going to hurt, and I don’t do hurt well. So I’m kind of bracing myself.”
“Hurt you or hurt me?”
“What?”
“Are you under the impression that the ax is falling on your head or mine?”
“Mine. Both of us. I don’t know.”
“What’s going on, AJ? Can we start from the beginning? Because I don’t know about you, but I’m really confused.”
“I’m not confused. Just about every other emotion under the sun, but not confused.”
“Good. Then we’ll let you take the lead.” She reached out again and picked up a piece of his stationery. Oh, no. He should have sealed it in an envelope.
“What the hell is this, for starters?”
“I’m assuming you read it.”
“Yes, I did. It was obviously written to me, so I didn’t think I was violating any privacy.”
“You weren’t. I’m just so sorry.”
“And yet I don’t know why.”
“Does that mean because you don’t think I have reason to be?”
“Well, I didn’t before I got here. Obviously I’ve changed my mind. It’s hard to get even a grunt out of you when you’re wrong about something usually. You’ve apologized more since I’ve been here than I bet you have in your entire life. So I’m trusting you have good reason. Or reasons. Tell me what they are.”
“Well, if you didn’t think so—”
“Sorry. Too late for that.”
He took her hand. “I’m sorry for disappointing you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth about Heather. And I’m sorry I’ve been such a jerk the last few days. Most of all, I am really sorry that I didn’t tell you I love you when you gave me every chance and reason to. I’m sorry that I’ve been so crazy the last few days. And if it’s too late, I only have me to blame for that.”
She was quiet for a while. “Okay, now we’re getting somewhere. But a little clarification, please. How have you disappointed me?”
“I let you down. When you didn’t want to do this, when you were begging me to let you go home, I should have.”
“True. Why didn’t you?”
“I didn’t want you to go. A
t first it was just a battle of wills. That took all of about two seconds to morph into being obsessed with you.”
“You were obsessed? You sure didn’t act obsessed. I mean, I think obsessed would have scared the hell out of me. I was never afraid of you.”
“Don’t I know it. The bottom line is, I should have respected your wishes and just let you go.”
“And you’re sorry you didn’t now.”
“Yes. Very much.”
“So that means you’re sorry for everything that’s happened in that time?”
He was beginning to get good at seeing the traps. Still not so good about avoiding them, but he saw them clear as hell. “I’m not sorry about us. It’s the only thing I’m not sorry about.”
“Forgetting for the moment that if you didn’t need to be sorry about letting me leave, the only thing you aren’t sorry about would never have happened.”
“You make it sound illogical.”
“No. Really? How do I do that?”
“Okay, I’m still not making sense.”
“Nope. Let’s keep going because I have the feeling that all of these things are connected, so if we see the entire chain we can figure out which links are warped.”
“That’s a pretty awesome analogy for right off the top of your head.”
“How do you know I wasn’t saving it for just the right dumb-AJ moment?”
“You know, I’m starting to think this apology is just your way of torturing me, because if you’d come over here to yell at me and tell me to go to hell you would have done it by now, then I could be pleading the fifth and leaving it at that.”
“Let’s forget the ‘forcing me to stay in L.A. against my will’ problem. Let’s move on. I’m here and we’ve gotten together and you made love to me like I’ve never had in my life.”
“That’s the part I absolutely refuse to apologize for.”
“Good, because that would be insulting.” She tucked her legs under her. “Why have you been such a jerk?”
“Because you don’t need me anymore. And you were beginning to like everything you’d sworn you hated. And I felt like I was losing you and had no way to fight back. So I was angry.”
“Where did you get the impression I don’t need you anymore? I need you with every breath I take.”
“Oh, my God. Just shoot me now.”
“That’s always the way I’ve wanted a man to react when I tell him I need him.”
“I meant you didn’t need me on the set.”
“Not as much, maybe. But so what? The plain truth is, if I walked away tomorrow, Pretty Women would go on without me. Therefore you wouldn’t need me, either.”
He didn’t say anything because there was nothing to say. That was all true. It would probably take a hit because the audience had bonded to Tanya in record time, but they could have found another personality to do the show, and it would likely survive.
“That can’t be all,” she said. “What else?”
“Well, not only were you beginning to get along here without me, you were actually enjoying yourself.”
“You have got to be kidding me! I’ve got two things I love about this town. You and the mentoring program starting up at the youth club.”
“Mentoring program? What mentoring program?”
She threw up her hands. “Surprise!”
“What?”
“Well, I was going to do it in a really cool way, by having you watch a show with me tonight. But that kind of isn’t going to happen.”
“A show? You mean After Dark?”
“You found out about After Dark?”
“Yes.”
“See, isn’t it great?”
“The crew’s pretty happy about it.”
“The crew? Well, I guess it’ll be good for the show. But I was sneaky. I did it for the mentoring program.”
“What mentoring program?” he asked, worrying he was losing the thrust of the conversation again.
“The one that’s starting up at the youth club,” she repeated. “Foster the Children.”
“That’s what you’ve been . . . oh, you’ve got to be kidding me.”
“No. It’s going to be fabulous! We’re already recruiting volunteers. We assign mentors to needy kids from foster homes. The mentors take them under their wings and teach them skills and give them attention. The way you are with Maria.”
“That’s different, though. She’s my sister. Kind of. She needs me.”
“Yes, I’m sure all of the kids who grew up at the Landry household go back on a regular basis and invite a stranger into their home.” She smiled. “And buy her a sewing machine for her birthday.”
“I don’t know if you’re a really good spy or if you’re just getting lucky here.”
“Both. It was wonderful, AJ. She’s already making her own clothes, and if she keeps it up she has a skill. And her office isn’t the street corner.”
“I love you.”
“That’s the most intelligent thing you’ve said to me in a week.”
He let that one slide. “So what does that have to do with After Dark?”
“I offered to cut his band leader’s hair.”
“Sam?”
“Right there on the set. For a donation to the program, that is.”
“Did he take you up on it?”
“Max loved the idea,” she said, grinning.
“It’s probably a little late to point this out, but Sam’s almost bald.”
“Exactly, but he does have a little mustache. That’s why it was so funny.”
“We have to watch it.”
“Oh, we will. It’s just not going to be a surprise any longer.”
“I’m sorry I ruined the surprise.”
“You know, there’s a reason why I hate surprises. This one seems to have backfired on me.”
“All of those late nights. Cancelled dinners. Max. Tanya, you did Max! Let’s not discount how huge that is.”
“If it brings in money and volunteers, it was worth it.”
“But see, you got through it without me. And it’s not that I’m upset that you’re growing. I was just really afraid you were growing in the wrong direction.”
“Away from you?” she asked quietly.
“Yes. Selfish as that is, it scared the hell out of me that maybe you didn’t need me any longer.”
“Oh, but I did. And you got me through it.”
“By getting drunk? Sorry, honey, but not even for you.”
“No, silly. I was a basket case. I mean it, scared out of my wits. And I got through it by following a piece of advice you gave me once.”
“I gave you advice?”
“Yes. You told me to admit to people I was scared. The moment you tell an audience that, you said, they’ll be cheering so hard for you that you can’t help but succeed. And that’s exactly what I did. I plunked my butt down in his chair and told him I was scared out of my mind, and if he was any kind of host, he’d cover for me.”
“It worked?”
“I’ll let you judge for yourself.”
“I love you.”
“You’re getting good at that.”
“Practice, practice. Believe it or not, I say that to the image of you in my mind dozens of times a day.”
“Easier?”
“Your image always appreciates it, never gives me a hard time and always, always says it back to me.”
“I’ll give you two out of those three.”
“I’ll take it.”
“I love you too, AJ. More than you realize.”
“You went on After Dark for me. I realize, Tanya.”
“Good. Don’t ever forget it.”
“See, now there
’s where your image would have—”
“Stuff it.”
“Okay, next topic.”
“We’re not done? I was kind of hoping we’d go for the make-up sex.”
“I’m pro make-up sex. Except I don’t want to have to make up too often. I don’t want to fight with you, Tanya.”
“Same here. We’ll use it very, very sparingly. And even then we’ll probably just create a fight so we can make up.”
He stared at her, because it was beginning to sink in. He still had a fighting chance with her. He’d come to all of these conclusions based on one stupid surprise he’d been too dense to consider what she was up to. And she was going to forgive him.
“I am so lucky,” he said.
“Me too. Let’s have make-up sex.”
He jumped up, but then instantly sat back down. “Just one more thing.”
“Another one!”
“It’s simple, you’ll laugh, and then we’ll go make love.”
“I’ll be the judge of that, it better be good to make me laugh, and I wouldn’t count on the making love too much yet.”
“Now again, here’s where your image would have—” She gave him an ominous look. “Okay, moving right along. I’ve got a hypothetical for you.”
“Really? Interesting. Hit me.”
“Let’s say hypothetically the man that you’re going to love forever is waylaid in his office by an amoral skunk of a reporter who’d do anything to get a scoop.”
“Okay. I’m with you so far.”
“And let’s say—now remember, the reporter’s the bad guy—”
“Hypothetically.”
“No, that part’s real.”
“Right. That part’s real.”
“Have I mentioned I love you?”
“Back atcha. Go on.”
“And that you’re gorgeous when you’re not mad at me?”
“Hypothetically.”
He swallowed. “No, I’m pretty sure that part’s real, too.”
“We’ll find out, won’t we?”
“Okay, so hypothetically this very real vulture comes storming into my office.”
“I’m picturing it. And you hypothetically say, ‘What can I do for you, Eloise?”’
“Right! You’re getting real good at this.”
“Have I mentioned that you’re not all that cute when you’re stalling? And when you’re holding up make-up sex.”