Time Out of Mind

by Ruth Hay

  No resident is allowed to exit on their own and you must politely refuse to help.”

  “What if her son really is there?” asked Eric.

  Mary looked down for a second then sighed. “Unfortunately her son no longer comes to visit. Seeing his mother with such memory loss made him very upset. He hasn’t been here for years but she waits for him every day.”

  Caroline heard a gasp from one of the girls and realized it was likely that some of the group might back out of the project now that they had a better idea of what they would be dealing with. She stepped forward and thanked Mary for her time then herded the group outside so they could ask more questions without the risk of offending anyone.

  The effect of Mary’s short talk was obvious as the group absorbed the information Mary had given them and began firing a barrage of questions at Caroline as soon as they reached the parking lot.

  “Wow! That was intense! I don’t know if I can handle this. What’s in it for us Caroline?”

  “How did you get involved with this place?”

  “We’ve only seen a few of the oldies. How many are there?”

  “How many places like this are there?”

  “Holy crap! Is this what happens to us when we get old?”

  Caroline knew she had to calm the group down. “Look, Olivia’s house is only five minutes from here. I asked her if we could meet in her garden after the orientation and she agreed. Let’s walk there and I’ll explain everything. I promise to be done by six.”

  Caroline hoped the short walk in the fresh air would settle some of the students. She knew the oppressive atmosphere of the nursing home took getting used to. In the forefront of her mind was the knowledge that the project plans could not be accomplished if the volunteers did not turn up when needed. The Community Connections activities depended on the goodwill of her fellow students and Caroline would never succeed without their cooperation.

  Olivia met them at the front gate of her house and led the group to the rear garden via a side path. It had been a fine day and the lawn grass was dry enough for everyone to find a spot around Caroline.

  “I’ll try to answer your questions, gang, but I am no expert. First of all, my involvement with Mayfield Manor was because of my great-grandmother. My Gran Lynn usually visited her with the occasional help of my own mother, but, this spring, both of them were away, or too busy, and I was asked to fill in for a week or two. Honestly, I went through the same shock as you just had. I did not know how to deal with the situation. After a while, though, I began to notice things that could be improved, and that’s basically how this project came to be.”

  “Where’s your great-grandmother now, Caroline?”

  “She’s still there in a room in the far corridor. She is silent most of the time and not happy at other times. I wanted to do something to make her last days a little bit better for her.”

  There was a pause as the group absorbed this information.

  Caroline went on. “I don’t know the exact number of residents but there are a lot more than you saw today and there’s a whole floor above where the most disturbed or withdrawn folks live.” When she saw the expressions on some of the faces around her, she jumped in quickly with the comment. ” You won’t be going there, don’t worry!”

  She saw a few smiles emerge from the concerned faces and decided on a lighter approach.

  “None of you will get wrinkles from being around older people!”

  Hesitant laughter met this comment.

  “I am sure you will be able to work wonders with the great ideas you have already suggested and it’s only for a short time. By the beginning of June, school will be over, the project will be done and you will be glad you gave your energy to those less fortunate. I’ll be working with you most of the time until then. Trust me; it will all make sense in a few days.”

  Adam’s deep voice interjected after Caroline’s speech was over. “What happens when we all go away?”

  Caroline had been wondering the same thing but she couldn’t see that far ahead.

  “Adam, I just don’t know yet. Let’s do the best we can for now and let me know if you have any thoughts on that as the weeks go by.” Caroline stood up and stretched her arms above her head. “OK! That’s it, gang! I can’t thank you enough for coming. Orientation is over. Tomorrow we start to work!”

  * * *

  Just over a week later, Sarah Fenton got a call from her mother.

  “Look, Sarah, I hate to bother you at work.”

  “That’s all right, Mum, the phones are quiet for a minute although the fallout from this Icelandic ash cloud is causing chaos in the travel business.”

  “I think you made a joke, dear!”

  “Purely accidental, I assure you. There’s not much humour around here at the moment.

  Anyway, what’s up? Are you and Stavros well?”

  “We’re fine, Sarah. It’s Caroline I’m calling about.”

  “She wasn’t complaining this morning, although she has been very busy lately with the college project at the nursing home. What’s happened to her?”

  “Nothing bad, I’m glad to say. I wanted to tell you what’s been happening at Mayfield Manor.”

  “Oh, Mum, I am sorry! I just can’t get away right now and I have left all the visiting of Gran Isobel to you. Is she all right?”

  “Much the same, I’m afraid, but that’s not what I wanted to tell you, Sarah.”

  “Can you give me the short version, Mum? I really don’t have time for a long chat at the moment.” Sarah sighed as the irate couple, who had monopolized two hours of her time yesterday, returned through the office door. Their daughter and son-in law were stranded in Spain and running out of money and they wanted to know what Sarah was going to do about it.

  “Just try to get along to the nursing home between four and six in the afternoon and you will see for yourself, dear. Bye for now.”

  With this enigmatic statement her mother hung up.

  Sarah pasted a smile onto her face and welcomed the couple. Under her smile she was thinking, “Join the queue, people. There are hundreds ahead of you.”

  In a matter of minutes Sarah had forgotten her mother’s request.

  * * *

  Caroline soon discovered that she needed to send a daily schedule update to Eva Singh, despite the useful information Janine had compiled. Students took ill or had unexpected family matters to see to, or found they needed extra time for studying.

  Caroline got calls at home to alert her to absences and she made sure Eva’s computer had accurate information at the beginning of each day. Fortunately there were enough students to keep the program going and as long as Caroline was there to ensure a smooth transition, things were moving ahead more or less as planned.

  On the second Monday, three of the Garden Club team arrived with stakes and rope to mark out the proposed flower beds while, in the lounge, a quartet sang a selection of choral numbers they had been practicing all winter. The live music, accompanied by a flute and violin, seemed to interest the seniors and they applauded enthusiastically at the end of each number.

  Curious residents in nearby rooms came out to see what the fuss was about and soon there was an audience of about a dozen. Eva emerged from her office to observe, as the choir members went among the audience asking what kind of music they liked to hear and making notes for their next concert.

  Gina, the flute player, had downloaded some popular songs from the 1950s era and played them through her iPod. She was delighted when faces lit up at the sound of the voices of familiar crooners and some residents tried to sing along.

  Gina then volunteered to supply the music on individual iPods for those who would like to have their own copy. Eva suggested that an elderly man who had not been part of the group concert might like to try an ear bud re-play of the 50s songs. She knew the gentleman in question was very deaf and could not hear at normal volumes so Gina turned up the sound and was rewarded with an amazed expression of delight
on the old man’s face as he tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair.

  Caroline was pleased with this reaction. Only one or two residents had left the lounge during the quartet’s performance. She hoped they might be more responsive the next time.

  On Tuesday, Caroline spent the morning revising in college. She had the afternoon free and began her report on progress at the nursing home. By three o’clock she met with Jacqui’s crafts group and a couple of the chess players and they went together on the bus to Heathfield.

  The students were excited to start their projects and they eagerly listened as Caroline told them what had happened so far.

  Jacqui had brought coloured wools, donated by a local shop, and she had chosen a set of larger knitting needles and crochet hooks thinking that there would likely be seniors whose fingers were not as flexible as they once were, and the larger items would be easier to manipulate.

  Ian and George carried a bag with a chess board and playing pieces which they intended to set up on one of the dining room tables and leave there afterward with the residents, if anyone showed interest in the game.

  When the six students arrived at Mayfield Manor, the skies were darkening and rain was about to start. Inside the lounge the lights were on but only a handful of seniors remained there watching TV or dozing in their armchairs.

  The boys started their chess game right away while Jacqui went from chair to chair at the back of the lounge, away from the TV, asking if any of the women could knit or crochet. She announced that the college was contributing knitted items to a children’s orphanage in Africa and any help with sweaters, scarves, socks or gloves would be greatly appreciated.

  Some of the seniors looked blankly at Jacqui but one lady took hold of the knitting needles without saying a word and began to cast on stitches immediately.

  Jacqui and Sylvia sat nearby and worked on crochet hats they had already started, chatting to each other as the patterns developed and commenting on the speed at which the old lady’s practiced fingers clicked through the rows of stitches.

  Caroline left this cozy scene and took the chance to visit with her great-grandmother for a few minutes. She had not been back to her room since the incident with her Gran Lynn when the old photograph had caused such an upset, and she opened the door with that scene in her mind.

  Gigi was seated by the window in her wheelchair, watching the rain fall on the green area outside, where the ropes marking out future flower beds, were lying on the grass.

  Caroline sat down beside Gigi and talked to her about the plans for the garden and the ideas she had to make life in the nursing home a little brighter for everyone. She chattered on about home and family, filling the silence with hopeful words without much expectation of a response. She knew she was nervous with no clue about what, if anything, was getting through to her great-grandmother, when suddenly she realized that another voice had joined the conversation.

  Adam had popped his head around the door. “Hey Caroline! I ‘m sorry to interrupt but I came with some shrubs for the garden and I asked permission to drop them off outside so they could get the rain. Is that OK with you?”

  Before Caroline could reply, her great-grandmother’s face became animated and she turned her wheelchair toward the door where Adam stood, calling out in her scratchy old voice, “Philip? Is that you Philip? Thank God you’ve come back at last! I must tell you something important. I should have told you before now but I hated to confess what I did and you went away before I could get up the courage. Come closer, darling, so I can see you better.”

  Adam was uncertain what to do next and looked inquiringly at Caroline for advice. She was no wiser, as the entire incident had taken her completely by surprise.

  The teenagers stared at each other with open mouths. Caroline could only think that Adam’s deeper male voice had struck some chord in Gigi’s mind and she had reacted as if he were her son Philip.

  Fearing another meltdown like the photograph episode, she thought it would be best to leave the room and get Adam away quickly, but what might her great-grandmother reveal if she continued to talk to Adam about her hidden secrets?

  Guilt soon won out over fear as Caroline realized none of this was her business. Family matters should be left to her mother or Gran Lynn to solve. She was not qualified to delve into the past.

  She jumped up and pushed Adam out of the door hoping that the silence in the room would distract Gigi from her disturbing memories and send her back into whatever realm of semi- consciousness she lived in most of the time.

  “What the hell was that about?” Adam was angry and embarrassed that he had invaded Caroline’s privacy.

  “Look, Adam, I apologize for that scene. It wasn’t your fault. My great-grandmother thinks a lot about the past and I guess you reminded her of her son, my great-uncle Philip.”

  “Is that what dementia does?”

  “I am not sure, but her memory is much more vivid when she thinks about things that happened long ago. Today’s events are not so clear.”

  “Geez, I’m sorry I broke in like that. I won’t say a word to anyone else, Caroline.”

  “That’s all right, Adam. Thanks for being understanding, and thanks for bringing the plants today.” Caroline saw Adam’s worried look as he glanced over her shoulder at the door to her relative’s room.

  “Don’t worry about me,” she assured him. “I’ll be fine. She’s probably back asleep by now.

  I’ll be leaving soon with the rest of the gang.”

  “Well, if you’re sure?”

  “Yeah! Get out of here, dude! I’ll see you at swim practice.”

  Adam fled down the corridor at more than the normal speed and Caroline waited till he was out of sight before taking a deep breath and entering the room again. Just as she had thought, Gigi was fast asleep in her wheelchair but her hand was outstretched toward the door as if she longed to grasp something, or someone, and hold him close to her.

  Chapter Thirteen

  By the time Community Connections had gone through another week’s activities at the nursing home, the routines were well established.

  Most of Caroline’s Crew, (Janine’s latest name for them), had completed two or three final exams, formed groups for bus rides or car-pooled with helpful parents and were quite enthusiastic about their progress at Mayfield Manor.

  Between acting as coordinator each day and keeping up with schedules and reports, for both Eva and the college, Caroline was not able to oversee all the activities personally. She had to rely on everyone knowing what to do when they arrived. She suspected that fingers must have been red hot from the number of texts that flew back and forth each evening.

  Only two students had dropped out of the project. They complained in an e mail that they found the whole thing ‘too weird for them’. Caroline was angry at first, but in the end she sympathized and thanked them for trying.

  It wasn’t until late in the fourth week that Caroline could see what others had been noticing all along. Sarah had promised to give her a ride home just after six o’clock and she asked her daughter if she had a minute to share what had been going on.

  Caroline waited by the door to punch the code that would let her mother inside. She was curious to know what her mother would think, as their opportunities to talk at home about any recent events, had been curtailed by competing timetables. The fridge was covered with sticky notes directing, or re-directing, or simply cancelling previous arrangements.

  Eventually, even Mike got tired of the confusion and posted a large sign on top of all the notes stating;

  THIS IS CRAZY GUYS! GET YOUR ACTS TOGETHER!

  The residents were already eating in the dining area when Sarah arrived for her first visit in weeks. A customer had spoken warmly to her in the travel agency about the wonderful things that were happening in Mayfield Manor and those comments had reminded Sarah it was high time to make a visit to the nursing home a priority.

  Caroline quickly drew her mother’s attent
ion to a cork board on the wall outside Eva Singh’s office. Photographs were displayed there, showing residents involved in a variety of activities related to the Community Connections project.

  As her mother exclaimed at the series along the top of the board, picturing how the garden had developed from a featureless green area to a colourful vista of flower beds and shrubs with birdfeeders and a bird bath, Caroline acknowledged to herself that the team had achieved a tremendous amount in a short time.

  “Look how many seniors are helping the students, Caroline! I am amazed! Usually the outdoor area is empty other than a few smokers. This will make a tremendous difference around here.”

  “Don’t forget the inside activities, Mum,” said Caroline proudly, pointing to a section of photographs that showed Sheila’s mother sharing her golden lab’s gentle nature with a number of residents, and the line dancing afternoon that had been a hit with so many others.

  Sarah turned to look at her daughter with newly-appreciative eyes, and found the nursing home manager watching them.

  “I don’t mean to interrupt, Mrs. Fenton, but I wanted to take this chance to tell you how much good work this girl of yours has done here.”

  As Caroline’s cheeks flamed red, Eva directed her mother to the lounge where two chess games were in progress and several women were knitting, crocheting or working macramé around a table. Ashley was instructing a group on water painting techniques for card making and two college students were wheeling their charges back from a trip around the garden. From the sound of their laughter, a good time was had by all.

  “I realize all this looks wonderful, Mrs. Fenton, but what you don’t see immediately is the difference the program your daughter initiated has made to individuals.”