A Broken Forever

by Megan Noelle

  “I almost forgot how jumpy you can get.”

  “Please, feel free to forget again.”

  His pearly white smile made something deep in my core spark to life. It was difficult to explain, but it felt as though a switch had been flipped. Now that smile didn’t just warm my heart but made my knees weak. I was utterly mystified by the instinctual reaction.

  “Oh, I wouldn’t dare forget something like that now.”

  I rolled my eyes, deciding to test my balance getting back onto my feet. A momentary wobble quickly vanished, and I was back to normal. “What are you doing here?”

  His finger pointed at Tyler’s station counter where two brown bags rest. I had no idea what it was, but they smelt absolutely heavenly. “Brought some lunch, if you have time.”

  “How did you know this was my lunch break?” I raised my eyebrow and stared him down attempting to add a little intimidation. Determination to find out exactly what Stefan knew about my life had set in within the first ten minutes of opening my eyes this morning.

  His smirk grew as he fully understood what I was up to. “I actually had no idea, but this is mine and I didn’t feel like spending any more time in the office. Figured I’d pick up some food and see if my darling friend was hungry.”

  “You didn’t want to spend more time there? Are you implying that your work ran into the early morning hours?”

  If he didn’t log off for the night as promised I was going to catch him. It wasn’t a life or death matter, but the teasing nature of our conversation was making it impossible to back down.

  Stefan leaned in, leaving just a few inches in between us. The overwhelming response my body had at the sudden closeness set my nerves on high alert. The subtle hints of cologne tickled my nose. The warmth radiating from him circled around me in a delicious haze.

  “11:59.” I stared at him blankly for a few seconds. I had almost forgotten the question I asked as chills raced around every inch of my body.

  Struggling to fight the pull of overpowering emotions, our conversation came back to me. “A minute before? That’s impressive.”

  “Does that mean I earned your company for an hour to eat lunch?”

  My lips twitched up at the corners. “It is the least I could do. You did much better than I anticipated.”

  “Being able to surprise people is one of my favorite things.”

  “Well, then you get a gold star for the day.” Neither of us had attempted to put space in between our growing closeness. My back, up against the chair, and Stefan’s arm holding it steady leaning in, was an unmistakably intimate position. It hadn’t occurred to me that this increasingly intimate conversation was taking place on the salon floor.

  “I’ll start a collection.” Stefan winked before backing away, apparently sensing my immediate discomfort being around this many people. “Want to eat in here, or outside?”

  “The break room will work just fine, if that’s alright with you?”

  He nodded. “Lead the way, pretty girl.” There was no need to tell me twice, escaping the watchful eyes of all who knew me became top priority. Well, right behind purposely avoiding Kacie’s reaction. Sure, everything between us had been cleared but defending Stefan’s position of friendship would be much more challenging if we continued responding to each other in this way.

  Tyler was the other person with a lunch break at the same time, and I knew he planned to eat out. The break room kept our visit from being smack in the center of prying eyes, but public enough to be acceptable for a couple of friends.

  “What did you get today?” I asked, taking a seat in the same spot I talked with Kari in just hours earlier.

  “Some of the best greasy food Boston has to offer.”

  “Well, I’m sold! Sounds excellent to me.”

  Stefan pulled a couple greasy burgers, fries, and onion rings from the bag. “See pretty girl, I know what you like.”

  He winked and I smiled, watching closely while he talked about the first half of his day and divided up the food. Stefan could have picked up dumpster burgers and I would have thought they were the best. Just as long as they came with his company. We became enthralled with every twist of our conversation. Our focus never strayed and somehow, throughout the meal, our chairs became closer. Soon from our knees to our thighs brushed together.

  The circular table made us turn into our shared space to converse easier. Moving away a bit would have been just as comfortable but he didn’t suggest it and I had no reason to either.

  Stefan took a drink from the straw of his to-go cup. His eyes narrowed a bit as he looked me over. Never once during his inspection did I move from my position of leaning my head against my hand with my elbow on the table top.

  He replaced the cup and reached out, took a chunk of my hair and twirled it around his fingers. Only the ends of my hair received his touch but the feeling coursed all across my head and down my neck.

  “When did you do this?”

  “Do what?” I asked with an embarrassingly dreamy tone of voice.

  “Dye your hair this dark brown all over? You always had that caramel color with different shades of it naturally mixed in, right?”

  Stefan’s photographic memory always had a way of impressing me. “It was that way, yeah. I’ve been doing this color for a couple years now. I’m surprised your stalker files don’t go back that far.”

  He smirked but didn’t react. “It’s stunning with your face; the way it makes your eyes completely stand out.”

  This color had been a favorite of mine for years, but with Stefan’s praise I loved it that much more.

  “Do you like it better than my natural look?”

  Playing with a few more pieces he shrugged his shoulders. “Your other color was incredible and I don’t want to say I like this better. That implies I didn’t like the natural look on you. That was the best suiting for my high school sweetheart, but this…” His eyes moved about, not letting a single strand of hair go unseen. “This is just absolutely beautiful. You’re a gorgeous woman regardless, but damn.”

  He shook his head as if he was truly at a loss for words.

  I blushed furiously, looking away from his intensely focused blue eyes.

  “Like you’re one to talk, Stef. You were always the school stud, but you really grew up so nicely.” I peeked up at him and watched as a slow, sexy smile made the sapphire color in his eyes blaze.

  “Was that a compliment, Greyson Rose?”

  My head shook as I rolled my eyes. “Ever the cocky one.”

  Leaning in he placed an arm along the back of my chair; closing the already dwindling bubble of space between our bodies.

  “You know it, pretty girl.”

  I sat back, resting against Stefan’s arm but neither of us pulled away.

  “I’m not sure if I do, but I’ll bet just about every attractive woman within a 500-mile radius does.”

  Stefan chuckled and looked up at me with a hooded gaze. “Were you jealous?”

  My hand flew to my chest and my mouth fell in surprise. “Why would I ever be jealous of those…sluts?!” I finally found the best suited word for the kind of women he paraded around on his arm.

  A much grander laugh came this time. “Why don’t you tell me? Besides, they weren’t all sluts, Greyson Rose.”

  “Highly unlikely, and I don’t have to tell you anything because I was far from jealous.”

  “Was?” He purred out, shifting his face marginally closer.

  “Plus, maybe you missed it, but I’m happily engaged.” Holding up my left hand I let his eyes take in the vastness of the circular diamond, and equally impressive wedding band.

  “Oh, I didn’t forget.” The casual response was something I hadn’t expected. Neither was the way he wrapped his hand around mine to carefully examine the ring. His fingers pressed into my palm while his thumb moved the band to rub the typically covered skin.

  “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” I stuttered out. My throat grew dry as I wat
ched him carefully inspect my hand.

  “Gorgeous, but the ring is just alright.”

  Letting our eyes meet for a second he winked and returned to his examination.

  “Just alright? What makes you say that??”

  He shrugged, and turned my hand in his to focus on the lines of my palm. “I’ll admit, it’s a striking ring. I just don’t think it fits you.”

  “What are you talking about? It fits perfectly, we had it resized and everything.”

  “You know that’s not what I meant. The stone and design itself. A circle shows a road of ease, free of problems and that’s not all that life is. A square cut stone shows the bumps in life. The roads we travel and each side of that square represents the next phase of your lives together.”

  I gulped back the nerves as his words and delicate traces inside my palm shook my center. “Some believe the circle represents forever, you know. It isn’t showing the things people go through, just that they always come back around.”

  His fingers ceased as he met my eyes. “Doesn’t the square do the same thing? It isn’t perfect in its fluidity, but neither are the real problems in life. A circle connects, sure.” He drew my hand forward giving him better access to the rest of my arm. Pressing a finger tenderly against the inside of my elbow he began outlining a square. “But the square does to. The four corners don’t mean the road ends just that it changes. It represents the end of one chapter and the start of the next. Do you remember what kind of ring I gave you?”

  I nodded, even though his attention was on the drawing on my skin.

  “It was a wedding band that was silver on either side of a beautiful line of white and pink diamonds that ran down the middle.”

  Stefan nodded in approval. “I refused to ask my parents for money, because I didn’t believe that getting you the most expensive ring was going to prove my love. It was more important for me to get the right ring that symbolized far more than an engagement. I had two requirements when I picked it out. There had to be more than one color, because you are a multidimensional woman. And the second was that it needed to have square diamonds. The ones in the middle were small, but they were square.”

  My eyes darted from his face, to my ring, and to the invisible square on my arm. That had been the single most incredible piece of jewelry I had ever seen. I would spend hours just staring at it, but never did it hit me that those diamonds were square.

  “I loved that ring so much, Stefan.”

  Releasing my arm he looked into my eyes. “That was the plan. What ever happened to it?” I caught the way his Adam’s apple tensed as he waited for my reply.

  “I still have it.”

  “You do?” The astonishment wasn’t held back from his voice.

  I narrowed my eyes at him. “Did you assume I pawned it, or something?”

  “Well isn’t that just sort of what ex-wives do when they get divorced?”

  “Maybe some, but I refused to let some other person get their hands on my ring. It didn’t matter if I never wore it again, it was a part of me for years. I wasn’t going to get rid of it.”

  “I wore mine for at least a year after we signed the papers.”

  “Did you??”

  He shrugged his shoulders, as if we were having the most casual conversation. “Yeah, it was the only thing I had that kept me from completely losing myself.”

  My mind was running wild and if I didn’t gain control I would…actually no. I didn’t even want to know what. I searched for a quick escape and found one when the clock over the break room door showed there was less than two minutes of my break.

  Pushing back and jumping to my feet I brushed my hands down the front of my pants awkwardly, trying to hide the accelerating beat of my heart.

  “Well, I’m glad you had it. That’s…good.” Stefan picked up on the unease in my attitude instantly. His lips smirked up and I turned away from him; escaping to the trash can at the other side of the room with our food bags in hand.

  “So, thanks for bringing lunch. I promise one of these days I’ll treat us. It’s about time I get back in there though, hair to cut and all that.” The entire time my mouth rambled, my mind could not process what was happening. I focused my attention on straightening our little counter space. It was where we kept straws, plastic silverware, napkins and it somehow always managed to look horribly unorderly.

  Not that those reasons contributed to my sudden interest in cleaning. There was a slight possibility I was busying myself with menial tasks to get my heightened sensations back down. My blood raced, my heart pounded and my skin burned for the feather light touches that Stefan made. A minute passed and I realized Stefan never responded, and I could only avoid eye contact for so long before it became suspicious. Okay, more suspicious.

  Deciding that my overactive hormones were under control, I turned back toward the rest of the room but gasped as soon as I did. Stefan stood directly behind me, eyes looked up from hooded lids. The slight tension from before was almost out of control as he closed the distance between us. With each foot in my direction, I responded with a step backwards, until finally the wall stopped me. His tongue slid out over his lips making them glisten in an exceptionally tantalizing way.

  Not that I noticed of course, but someone might.

  “Is something wrong, Greyson Rose?” My name rolled off his tongue as he annunciated every syllable.

  “No, wh…” Deep Breath. “Why do you ask?”

  He took one more step closer. “You suddenly got very…” His face leaned down toward my chest, as he listened to the rapid beat against my ribs. “Jumpy.”

  The scent that covered every square inch of him took my senses hostage. Shivers raced up and down my spine and I tried to clear the intoxicating haze from my awareness.

  “I’m not.” I choked out.

  A mischievous grin touched his eyes and as much as I wanted to hate him for getting some sick pleasure out of what he was doing—I couldn’t. The urge to shove him back and pull him closer raged a war deep in my psyche. Stefan slowly lifted his arms and pinned the wall on either side of my shoulders. His feet stayed firmly planted but he lowered his upper body within an inch of mine.

  “So, last night you got me to promise I would shut down my work, at a time much earlier than I anticipated leaving. Do you remember?”

  “Yes,” I stuttered out.

  Stefan nodded, keeping his intense gaze trained on me. “Now I have something I want you to do for me.”

  My heart leapt into my throat and a sudden rush of heat swirled low in my belly. The heaves of my chest brushed faintly against his and each touch made my breath catch.

  “Wh…what’s that?” The shake of my voice became unbearable as I struggled to remain vigilant.

  “I just want you to answer one simple question for me.” His right hand left the wall, he held up one finger an inch from my nose.

  “Okay?”

  “You need to answer me with complete and absolute honesty. I’ll know when you’re lying to me, Greyson Rose. Will you promise to answer truthfully?”

  At this point I couldn’t filter my answers even if it was the difference between life and death. My tongue licked out onto my incredibly dry lips. For the first time Stefan’s eyes left mine as they focused onto my mouth. I forced down a rising groan.

  “I promise.”

  “Good girl. Tell me, when you saw another women with me in those tabloid articles; was there any part of you that was jealous?”

  Half a heartbeat was all it took for my answer to slip out freely. “Insanely.”

  His responding smile sent a rush of chills through my body, reaching a place that made my knees weaken. Closing the space between us he rubbed his nose against mine.

  “Good.”

  “Was that the plan?” I hesitated to ask, unsure of what the answer would do to me.

  His nose pressed once more against mine, heat from his breath caressed the curves of my yearning lips. “Maybe.”

  �
�Only maybe?”

  Chuckling he backed away a bit and ran a finger down the length of my arm. He stopped at my left hand and brought it eye-level. Sliding the engagement band up to my knuckle, he leaned in and pressed a tender kiss against the bare skin. My heart lurched forward, craving more, but I held as still as I possibly could.

  “I hope you’ll let me see you again soon, pretty girl. My day is immensely more special when you’re a part of it.”

  My body trembled relentlessly. “I promise.”

  Releasing my hand he smiled. “I’m holding you to that, Greyson Rose. Have a good day.”

  With that he turned and walked away. Before the break room door closed Tyler burst in, a look of wonder on his face.

  “So, just saw Stefan leave. He had the biggest shit-eating grin I have ever seen, woman! What the hell happened in here?”

  I still hadn’t moved from the wall and I was just as confused as Tyler looked. Shaking my head I gave the most honest answer I could. “I have absolutely no idea.”

  Sitting in my car at the end of my shift I created a new text to Stefan. The last four hours of my day were spent in a confused web of emotions. I would go from being swooned to being infuriated and it was followed by the feeling of needing more. I deserved answers before I went out of my mind trying to solve the many puzzling questions I had.

  Me: What the hell was that? Are you playing some kind of game with me, Stef??

  Before driving off, I sent a quick text to Richard to let him know I was on my way home. As soon as I pulled away from Bella Donna my phone pinged with a new message. It took curling my fingers around the wheel until they hurt, to keep from checking it. Maybe I had successfully avoiding texting while driving, but I probably managed to break about a dozen different speeding laws in the process. The instant my car was parked in front of my home, I had the phone in my hands.

  Stefan Harrison: I would never play a game like this with you, Grey.

  Me: You said you would be okay as my friend. Just as my friend.

  I couldn’t just sit in my car, but it would have been worse if I went inside to Richard and sat there texting Stefan. After I had my answers, I was powering down my phone and giving my fiancé the attention he deserved. When the sound of a new text went off my bones jumped. My nerves hadn’t been this on edge for years and now I had no control over the endless pressure.