“Eliza, please? I want to spend my free time with my daughter before she moves back to New York to start her adult life. Is that asking too much? You know I’m a busy man. I don’t always have free time.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Oh, you’re really pulling that card?”
“What? The guilt card?” He stroked his hair-free chin. “Hmm. Yeah. Get up.”
I laughed and Kelsey sat up. “I give up,” she said. “Once I’m awake, I can’t go back to sleep anyway.”
“Perfect.” Ben clasped his hands against his chest with a wide grin. “Meet ya out!”
We watched him step out of the room before looking at one another with dull expressions. “Is he always like this?” Kelsey asked, exasperated.
“Since he’s your ‘fashionista’ this summer,” I said, making quotation marks with my fingers, “it’ll get worse and worse.” I laughed.
“Oh boy,” she said, her tone monotonous. “Can’t wait.”
Kelsey and I got dressed in no time, and after we ate breakfast, we were on our way out. Ben decided on hitting the mall, and as soon as we were there, he dragged us all over the place. Department store after department store. Ben was a true maniac when it came to shopping and looking good. I admit he picked out some nice stuff for Kelsey and me. Kelsey didn’t really care what the clothes looked like as long as they fit and didn’t make her look like a tramp.
Ben’s response to her tramp comment was, “I do classy. Never trashy.”
We tried on a heap of clothes so Ben could approve or disapprove, and we had even stopped by an optometrist’s office so Ben could get Kelsey some contacts. He told her the glasses were a huge “no-no” while out in public. He wanted her to have a casual, sexy look, and for some reason I feared what Kelsey’s outcome would be within the next few days.
“All right, girls.” Ben sighed, pulling his sunglasses out to place them over his eyes. We bustled out the exit door with a load of bags in our hands and started through the parking lot to get to Ben’s BMW. “We did tons of shopping. I’m beat.” We met at the car and he popped the trunk open for us. We stuffed in our bags, letting out a relieved sigh before shutting it. “What do y’all want to eat?” he asked as we climbed into the car.
“I don’t know about you two, but I could use a big, unhealthy burger right now,” Kelsey said, clipping her seatbelt.
“There’s a nice place right around the corner that serves some great burgers.” Ben looked at me as he started the car.
I shrugged. “Anywhere is fine with me.”
After we pigged out on lunch and Ben asked us a load of embarrassing questions about boys and what interested us, we were headed home. I was glad Ben took the day off for me, but I was also worn and it was only three in the afternoon. He wanted to watch movies later on that night, and I could deal with that. I didn’t know if I could’ve made it through another department store without passing out.
We chose to watch a romance movie starring Rachel McAdams and Channing Tatum. About twenty minutes in, Ben and Kelsey had fallen asleep. I laughed at the two before returning my attention to the movie. I couldn’t let it go to waste. Plus, Channing Tatum was hotter than hell.
About forty-five minutes into the movie, there was a knock at the door. I picked up my phone and checked the time. It was too late for anyone to be knocking at our door, but we did have some annoying girl neighbors who always wanted to see if FireNine was around.
I sighed, standing from the couch and placing the empty bowl of popcorn on the table. I trudged toward the door and peeped out the peephole. And when I did, I gasped and my knees buckled.
I scowled at the person standing on the other side. What the fuck was she doing here? How did she know where I lived? All of a sudden, rage took hold of me and I unlocked the door rapidly, ready to spit fire.
She looked terrible. Her lips were chapped. Her blond hair was a curly, frizzy mess on top of her head. She’d lost a lot of weight (most likely from abusing drugs), and her smile revealed horrendously rotten teeth. She looked disgusting.
“Hi, Liza,” Debra, my mom, said, smirking.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I growled.
“I’m here to say hello,” she said, still smirking.
“How did you know where we lived?”
“I know lots of things. I know people.” I scowled at her and started shutting the door in her face, but she stopped it with her hand. For a sick-looking druggy that could’ve passed for an anorexic, she was pretty strong. “Hold on now.” I opened the door, frowning. “I wanted to talk to ya. I heard about your graduation. Can’t believe you actually did something with yourself.”
“Why. Are. You. Here?”
“I’m here to catch up, is all.”
“There’s no need to catch up.” I started to shut the door again, but her cackle made me stop. “What the hell is so funny?”
“You have balls now. How long ago did they drop? When you told that pretty band boy good-bye? Or was it when Jason took you to all them fights with those girls?”
My eyes narrowed and true anger found its way to surface. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” She rolled her eyes. “Look, I have a small favor to ask of you. Jason back there is having a hard time finding a job. We need a loan. Ben’s got all that money now. You screwin’ that rocker boy. One of y’all could give us somethin’.”
“Ben isn’t giving you shit after you robbed him of everything he had,” I seethed. “You really have the audacity to stand in front of me and ask for money?”
“Ben owes me heaps of child support from years ago,” she said, folding her bony arms.
“Ben doesn’t owe you shit, Mom! Or should I call you Debra? You damn sure weren’t a mother to me.” I folded my arms, mirroring her stance and leaning against the frame.
Debra chuckled, looking me over while licking her cracked lips. “This is fun-ny. I swear it is. Look at you, all grown up. Standing your ground. Trying to be a woman.” Debra took a step back. “Let me just call Jason up here. I bet he’ll get you to crack.”
She was really pissing me off. I took a step out and shut the door, getting nose-to-nose with her. “Fuck you and fuck Jason. Y’all don’t scare me anymore.”
“Say that to my face, pretty girl.” Jason’s deep voice boomed from behind Debra and she smirked, stepping to the side so I could see him. And as soon as I saw him, panic prevailed. I inhaled, choking on my own spit. Jason was bigger. Sloppier and bigger. And uglier. And still intimidating.
All of my courage went down the drain at the sight of him. It’s almost like all the memories of him tossing me around came back. He took slow steps forward in his crusty overalls. His beer belly had expanded and a few teeth were missing in his eerie smile.
“You look good,” Jason said. “Good as hell. And if you looking that good, then you can give us some money like she asked. We raised you. We took care of you. It’s only right. You owe us.”
“Fuck you,” I rasped.
“Oh? Fuck me?” Jason’s chuckle boomed across the patio. “Lil’ ol’ Eliza done grew up on me.”
I shook my head. I wasn’t going to let them win. Not tonight. Not after all the shit they put me through. Not after they tossed me around and abused me. Not after they robbed my dad of all his belongings. Not after all the hell I had to go through in life just because they didn’t have enough heart to care for me or my well-being.
“Yes,” I snapped. “Fuck you.”
Jason took another step in and gripped my arm. Debra took a step away, sneering as she folded her arms and watched. “What the hell did you just say to me?”
“Fuck you!”
Jason gripped me by the throat with his free hand and I choked as he lifted me by the neck like a feather. He pinned me against the porch rail and I gasped for air, clawing at his bear-like hand. “What’s that now?” Jason growled, his green eyes boring holes through mine.
“Don’t hurt her, J. We still need her to get us
some money.”
“Fuck the money right now. Don’t nobody talk to me like that.” Jason gripped harder, and I tried to cry out for help, but it was useless. I couldn’t breathe. He was nearly crushing my esophagus. “We need to teach her a lesson. Just ‘cause she livin’ with a faggot and fuckin’ a rich boy don’t mean shit changed. You respect and abide by me and you always will. You got that?”
I would have rather choked to death than give him any kind of satisfaction. Jason gripped harder and harder, waiting for me to say something. Anything. I wanted to give in. I wanted to tell him yes and that he would always have some kind of power over me. He scared the living shit out of me, and I knew it would be this way for the rest of my life. Always scared. Always worried. But I hated him. I wanted to be strong for once.
But just as I was about to beg him to stop, someone gripped Jason by the shoulder and yanked him back. I fell to the ground and gasped for air, but I saw everything. Roy had pushed Jason back and pounced on top of him. At first, I thought I was seeing shit, so I looked at Debra, who was staring at them, just as shocked, and I knew maybe this was real.
And then Montana rushed for the porch, helping me up. “You all right, Eliza?” he asked, eyes full of concern.
I nodded, but I couldn’t help watching the full-on brawl in front of me. Roy was on top of Jason and his fists were hammering into his face. Jason was trying to push him off, but Roy wasn’t having it. I couldn’t see Roy’s face, but I knew he was pissed. Why would he be pissed? What the hell was he doing here? And why would he be fighting for me?
I shifted a bit, listening as bones crunched. Roy was beating the ever-loving shit out of Jason… and I wasn’t going to stop it. Neither was Montana.
“Stop!” Debra wailed, rushing down the porch stairs to grab Roy. Roy didn’t budge. He kept hitting until his knuckles bled. And then he raised his fist in the air, winding it up for his last blow. He slammed it into Jason’s face and Jason’s head fell to the side. Roy knocked him out cold. “What the fuck did you do that shit for?” Debra screamed at Roy.
Roy hopped up, his face paler than a sheet of paper. He was angry and seeing his anger was shocking. “You better get the fuck outta here or you’re next,” Roy growled. Just as he said that, the front door creaked open behind me and Ben stumbled out with wide eyes.
“What the hell is going on out here?” Ben took a look around and then gasped. “Debra?” he called, looking at her with creased brows. Debra scowled at him before bending down to pick up her sloppy husband. She struggled the whole time but got him up eventually. “What the hell is going on?” Ben asked again, this time frowning.
“Ain’t shit going on. We’re leaving,” Debra snapped.
“The hell you are. I have a bone to pick with you.”
“Some other time, gay boy.” Debra waved her hand in the air before turning around.
A deep frown took hold of Ben’s face then. The next thing I knew, he stormed down the porch stairs and marched for her. Debra saw him coming and turned around, not daring to back down, but before Ben could get to her, Roy and Montana rushed for him and grabbed Ben to stop him. “You come to my fucking home again and you’ll regret it, bitch! You hear me?!” Ben roared. “I should knock you the fuck out for letting that filthy bastard put his hands on my daughter!”
“Oh, whatever.” Debra waved him off again and turned around, dragging the nearly unconscious Jason. She tossed him in the bed of their raggedy truck and then hurried for the driver’s seat. She was trying to be bold, but I knew she was scared out of her wits. She was a coward, always had been, and she was lucky she was getting away. Jason had lost the fight she thought he would win.
We all watched her crank the truck and pull out of the driveway, leaving a trail of dust behind her. I took a deep breath, shaking my head and lowering myself into the nearest rocking chair. And then it came at me, like a brick thrown at my chest. I clutched the heart of my shirt, breathing irregularly, begging for all the memories to stop.
I couldn’t breathe. Fuck. I couldn’t breathe.
“Eliza?” Ben called, marching up the porch steps. “Eliza, baby?”
I couldn’t respond to him. I couldn’t tell him I was okay because I wasn’t. I thought all the nightmares were gone—that I never had to worry about her or Jason again, but I was wrong. Seeing him brought it all back, and I hated how weak I was. I hadn’t thought about them for so long. I nearly forgot about them, and that was okay. The nightmares stopped. Everything.
“What the hell is happening to her?” I heard Montana ask.
“She just has to breathe,” Ben murmured.
“Breathe, Eliza. They weren’t worth it,” Roy said. I was surprised he spoke up. I was even more surprised when he kept talking. “I can tell you’ve been fighting this for years so keep fighting it. Don’t let them win.” I looked at him beneath my eyelashes and my heavy breathing stifled. He was staring at me, his dark eyes wide, his fingers tucked in his pockets. “It’s all about breathing and moving on nowadays.”
For some reason, hearing him calmed me down a bit. I didn’t expect him to speak or give a mini speech. And the way he spoke made him seem wise, like he’d been through it all before. Like he knew what being strong was all about.
Roy looked up at me and I fidgeted in my chair before standing with wobbly knees. Ben asked if I was okay and I nodded.
“Need your inhaler?” he asked.
“No,” I rasped. “I’m fine.”
“You sure?” Montana asked, tilting his head. I nodded, smiling at him.
“Why are you two here?” Ben asked, checking his watch. “This isn’t like either of you.”
“We were in town and thought it’d be best to come talk to Miss Eliza while we were around,” Montana said, shrugging. “Got some serious shit going on and it’s time to settle it.”
“Oh. Does it have to do with the band?”
They both nodded.
“Will I be upset?”
They nodded again.
“Is… there… something I should know?”
“It’s about Gage and Eliza. Just some personal matters,” Roy said.
This took me completely off guard. I snapped my gaze on both of them.
Ben raised his eyebrows and sighed. “Personal matters, huh? Usually, I’m the one to be nosey, but I think I’ll stay out of it this time. Can’t mix business with personal issues. I’m gonna head to bed.” He capped my shoulders, and I looked into his eyes. “You’re sure you’re okay?”
“I’m okay, Ben. Promise.”
He sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “Should’ve let me beat her ass,” he muttered, grabbing the door handle.
“That wouldn’t have been too pretty, boss!” Montana burst out laughing. “I think you’re forgetting you still carry balls in those tight pants of yours.”
Ben let out a laugh as well. “Touché, Delray.” With that, Ben stepped in the house and shut the door behind him.
I met at the first porch stair and Roy sighed, pushing his hair out of his eyes. “You think we’re fucking insane for randomly showing up, don’t you?” he asked.
I shrugged. “You saved me, so not at all.”
He looked away and laughed while Montana stepped up. “We weren’t supposed to come here,” Montana said. “Gage told us not to and we tried not to, but we aren’t letting this shit go on any longer.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked, exchanging glances between the two.
“Gage and Penelope, that’s what,” Roy said. It was so weird hearing him talk to me this much. I never thought I’d see this one coming. “He doesn’t have the balls to say or do it, so I’ll say it. He isn’t happy. He’s going out of his fucking mind dealing with Penelope and his sick sister.”
“Gage is losing it, man.” Montana’s voice wavered, and it was bad hearing him like this. It scared me because he was scared and worried, and I never thought that was possible. Not from Delray. He never worried. “It’s fucking w
ith the band. I usually don’t care for his drama or that bitch, but when it involves us, I have to do something.”
“You know?” I asked, narrowing my eyes.
Roy nodded. “Yeah. We know. Wasn’t too hard to figure out. We know who Penelope’s dad is to us. And we know Gage can’t stand her.”
“She’s a sneaky fucking bitch,” Montana mumbled.
Roy looked at me with dark, saddened eyes. “Gage is in fucking love with you. He misses you. He talks about you every time we’re together, which is a lot. We came because we want you to help him. We heard you’re going to work in New York now… from Ben. We want you to come back early and talk to Gage while he’s back in the city with Kristina.”
“I—I can’t do that. It’s been so long. Gage and me aren’t—”
“You and Gage were happy together. I know that feeling. When you feel like giving your all for someone but they choose the opposite path…” Roy muttered. “I felt for Gage when you came on tour with us a few summers ago.”
“What do you mean?” I whispered.
Roy sighed, biting his lip. “I mean, I know how it feels to think someone will stay with you for the rest of your life but then leave when you need them most.” Damn. Maybe Kelsey was right about Roy being in love before. “There was a reason I always stayed away from you,” Roy said. “And there was a reason I was so bitter when you were around…”
“Oh, this is a good one.” Montana sneered, sliding his fingers in his pockets. Roy gave him a stern look and Montana simply shrugged.
“Why?” I asked.
“Well, now that I think about it, it was kind of rude and lame of me… but it was because you remind me of her. Her name was Rosemarie. I called her Rose. She had blond hair, just like yours. She smiled… just like you. And she was chasing after a dream… just like you. You had so much in common with her and it scared the living shit out of me.” Roy looked at me with stern eyes. After a moment, he looked away, staring straight ahead at the field across from our house. “I should’ve seen it coming, though. It’s not like she didn’t talk about her dream job every day. She wanted to be a teacher. She loved kids, and we even talked about having kids. She was a ‘people’ person… far from what I was. What I’ll ever be. I couldn’t stand being around people. It was just me, her, my guitar, and my band. Nothing else. The band has been like brothers ever since.” Roy laughed, lowering his gaze. Montana laughed with him, as if remembering the day they all met.
Who We Are (FireNine #2) Page 13