by Aimee McNeil
The school was slowly taking shape and becoming a very welcome addition to the community. When Adalynne arrived there was a new wooden sign out front with Music House carved beautifully into its surface, musical notes bordering the letters. It replaced the old makeshift sign Elizabeth had temporarily put up outside. There were a few new minor adjustments to the interior, making the space more conducive to their needs. A few more rooms were set up for lessons, fully utilizing the entire building. Adalynne was impressed how things were coming along so wonderfully.
When Adalynne walked into the building she could hear the music coming from behind many of the closed doors stretching down the hallway. The occasional squeaks and complaints of pained instruments brought a smile to her face.
The mural Adalynne had painted in the entrance still covered the walls, bringing vibrancy to the space. She still remembered the hours she put into it trying to make the entrance inspirational to the people who walked through the doors. A small stage still existed from when the building had been used as an elementary school, and was put to full use. Elizabeth used it for concerts and for the children to play for each other. Adalynne remembered organizing the concerts last year and all the people who had shown up to see the children’s progress. It was such a rewarding experience to see everyone enjoying the hard work taking place within these walls.
“The sign looks great!” Adalynne complimented.
Elizabeth looked up from her stack of papers with a vibrant smile. Her eclectic style and her wayward hair tied in a knot on the top of her head embodied creativity, and were among her many endearing traits that Adalynne adored. “I wasn’t expecting you ’til later. Are you all settled in your new place?” Elizabeth grabbed hold of her and pulled her into a tight hug.
“I got tired of unpacking. I needed a break.” Adalynne sat down next to the mess of papers surrounding Elizabeth. When she was unpacking she came across the envelope that Fox had left on her pillow. She knew the moment she picked it up where it belonged. “I have something for you.” Adalynne placed the envelope on the desk in front of Elizabeth. “I know you’re in need of a new piano.”
Elizabeth opened the envelope and gasped. “Addie, I can’t take that from you.”
“Yes, you can. I need this money to go somewhere it will make a difference. It’s important to me, Elizabeth. Please,” Adalynne pleaded. “We both know how important it is to have a proper piano here.” She indicated the walls around them and smiled when she knew she won the argument.
Elizabeth looked into Adalynne’s eyes and her features softened. “How will I ever repay you for everything you have done for me and this place?” Elizabeth shook her head. “You are the reason I have made it this far. You have more heart than anyone I know, Adalynne.” Elizabeth smiled brightly, crinkling the skin around her eyes.
“Don’t give me that much credit,” Adalynne said. “You brought this place to life.”
Between her work with Elizabeth and her studies, Adalynne found her days filled. She hadn’t seen Katie as much as she would have liked because of school and Katie’s new relationship with Steven. Katie had given her so much of her time when her father died that she was trying to allow her to catch up on the other parts of her life. They spoke frequently on the phone and Adalynne loved to hear what Katie was up to.
Katie was always quick to fill her in on all the drama she was missing and the fact that Matthew always showered Katie with questions and sulked because Adalynne refused to return his calls. True to her word, Katie never brought up Fox even though Adalynne knew she wanted to. Thankfully, Adalynne’s busy schedule allowed little time for her to dwell on the matter.
Late at night was a different story, when her mind refused to slip away into a restful sleep. Thoughts of Fox filled her mind. It had been months since that night she had given herself to him. The days grew colder as winter settled in but the clarity of the memory refused to fade. She could still remember his smell as if he were still with her, her skin remembered his body pressed against hers. The feel of his strong body still lingered upon her fingers as she remembered exploring his flesh. She wondered how she would ever escape the torment her heart inflicted upon her.
***
“I finally finished my apartment. It now officially looks like someone lives here.” Adalynne told Katie when her number lit up her screen. “You would be so proud of me.” Adalynne paused her playlist on the computer so Katie couldn’t hear the music in the background. A list of all of Outcome’s songs filled her screen. She couldn’t resist teasing herself by listening to Fox’s music.
“That’s wonderful news. How about you let me in and show me around?” Katie practically screamed with excitement.
“What? You’re here?”
“Let us in! It’s cold out here,” Katie complained in the phone.
“Us?” Adalynne said as she buzzed them in the front door.
“Don’t be mad,” Katie blurted into the phone before hanging up.
A moment later, Katie walked in her apartment door, followed by Matthew. “I wanted to surprise you and he insisted on coming.” Katie smiled awkwardly, in hopes that she would be forgiven.
“Hey, Matthew.” Adalynne smiled over Katie’s shoulder as she hugged her friend. “Come on in.” She was actually glad that Matthew had come. She didn’t realize she missed him until she laid eyes on him. The possibility of a relationship didn’t seem so far from her thoughts anymore now that life had calmed down. She wrapped her arms around Matthew in a warm embrace.
He immediately returned the gesture and pulled her close. “I missed you,” he whispered, leaning in close to her ear. The way he looked down at her, his infectious smile brightening his handsome features, she couldn’t help but think that maybe there was still a chance for them.
She spent the day with Katie and Matthew and it was a nice reprieve from her usual activities. Katie even insisted Adalynne take them to Elizabeth’s music school because she was always talking about it. Adalynne proudly toured them through the facility and introduced them to Elizabeth. Katie loved the school and was instantly impressed with Adalynne’s involvement.
During their visit, Elizabeth insisted Adalynne break in the new piano that had arrived that morning. Katie encouraged it because she had never heard Adalynne play before. She played some classic tunes she knew Katie would love. It wasn’t long before Katie was singing along to the music, drawing the children to the excitement. Katie’s energetic personality was a perfect fit with the children and she encouraged them all to dance along. Everyone was having a great time except Matthew, who stood off to the side, looking slightly bored. He kept his attention on his phone. Adalynne knew he was not musically inclined but was discouraged to find out that he didn’t appreciate the art, either. Adalynne tried to push any of these tentative thoughts aside. Sharing the love of music was not a necessity for a relationship. She and Fox loved music and that relationship was a failure from the beginning.
Matthew and Katie stayed with her that night. They indulged in wine and take-out Chinese as they covered every topic of importance. Adalynne could not escape the hint of jealousy as Matthew and Katie carried on about the latest dramatic developments on campus. She felt so removed from their lives first hand and couldn’t help but feel like an outsider. She missed Katie and secretly loved the fact Katie told her that her new roommate was a bore.
“You know what those law students are like,” Katie teased Matthew, giving him a little playful punch on the shoulder.
“Hey now. I’d like to argue that comment,” Matthew disputed.
“I bet you would.” Adalynne giggled.
“You look really good, Addie!” Katie gushed. “I was so worried about you. It’s so wonderful to know that you’re doing what makes you happy. I wish I could visit more.” She ended with a pout.
“Yes but that would mean leaving Steven’s bed more often,” Matthew tormented Katie.
“Hey!” Katie’s face turned bright red. “I’m not there that mu
ch.” Katie defended her honor to Adalynne. “But he does this thing with his—”
“Don’t!” Matthew covered his ears. “I don’t want to know the freaky shit you guys do in there because it is right next to my room.”
Adalynne laughed at this lighthearted side of Matthew. She was used to his carefully strategized demeanor as he procured his position among his friends. Adalynne remembered how the other guys at the Alpha house looked up to him but here in her home he was relaxed. She felt this was the first time she’d really glimpsed the man he was and she liked what she saw. They laughed and argued playfully for hours and the girls soon learned it was almost useless to try to build a case against him. His skills as a lawyer were definitely sharp, even with the vast amount of wine that he had ingested. The girls found it fun to wind him up and he took everything in stride. Adalynne couldn’t remember when she had laughed this much and she didn’t care her cheeks were sore. It was a welcome pain, from what she had experienced as of late.
Matthew was the perfect gentleman when it came to his behavior around her. His eyes always followed her and he would lean into her when she was close. Adalynne found the attention appealing and by the end of the night was extending some of the same gestures toward him. It wasn’t long before Katie caught on and excused herself to make a phone call.
Matthew took the opportunity to pull Adalynne aside. “I can’t think of anything but you, Addie.” The wine had made him even more forward than usual. “I need to know eventually you will want more.” He seemed to be struggling to keep his distance from her, his hands searching for a response from her as he touched her leg and caressed her shoulder.
“What if I say that time is now?” Adalynne looked up from under her dark lashes to see the smile spread across his handsome face.
“I’d say that it would make me very happy.” He claimed her lips, guiding her body back so she lay against the sofa as he deepened their kiss. “I’ve wanted to do that for so long,” he breathed against her lips before he kissed her again. The kiss did not stir uncontrollable desire but it felt good.
She placed a hand against his chest to catch her breath. “But…can we approach this a little more slowly?” Adalynne chuckled at his enthusiasm.
“Of course.” His smile tried to hide the disappointment she saw flash in his eyes. “I couldn’t help myself.”
Katie opened the door and walked out slowly, unsure of what she would walk into. Adalynne stood up to meet her, encouraging her to rejoin them. Although Matthew did not trigger the same intense response from her Fox did, she refused to get discouraged. Getting involved with Matthew was a good choice. He was handsome, successful, and most important, he wanted her. She wanted to feel loved.
The next morning Matthew left with his promise lingering in the air. This was the beginning of a wonderful thing between the two of them. She wanted to believe his words. She wanted her heart to accept what they were creating was the potential for love. She had to accept she would never have what her heart truly wanted.
Adalynne placed her hand against her chest, feeling the beat of her heart. She needed to let go of Fox so there was room for her to love someone else. She hoped more than anything Matthew was her reset button.
Chapter Seventeen
“So this Matthew guy?” Elizabeth asked with raised eyebrows.
Adalynne had come over to the Music House early to help Elizabeth with some things she was working on. Adalynne always enjoyed time with Elizabeth. Their relationship was always easy and natural.
“Yeah.” Adalynne shrugged her shoulders. “We’re seeing each other now.” It felt so strange to admit it. It felt like she was talking about someone other than herself.
“He is very handsome,” Elizabeth stated, studying Adalynne’s response. “I was starting to think you spent all your free time here. It’s nice to know that you’re taking time to date. A beautiful girl like you needs to feel the excitement of young love.” Elizabeth smiled, looking like she was calling to mind an old memory.
“Yeah.” Adalynne bit her lip.
Elizabeth looked at her for a moment before changing the subject. “Did you hear there was a fire at the Knight house last night?” Elizabeth watched for her reaction. “No one was hurt, thank goodness,” she added quickly. “John apparently decided to burn his shed down after he had a few too many. Rumor has it that it was filled with his late wife’s old belongings.” Elizabeth watched Adalynne perk up with the news. “Why do you never ask me about the Knight family? So many times I have watched the questions form on the tip of your tongue and then you dismiss them when someone mentions something about the family.” Elizabeth peered at Adalynne closely.
“Your heart is tied to them and I have a feeling I know why. I’ve seen that beautiful boy. Not much gets past me, Adalynne. I may be getting old and crazy but I can still figure things out. Especially when a beautiful girl hides out with me all the time and always looks toward the Knight’s house when she walks out this door, like you’re drawn to it.”
Adalynne collapsed in a chair. She didn’t realize how transparent she was. “What happened to his family? How did his mother die?” It was the question she wanted to know the answer to for long as she could remember. She wanted to know why he was the saddest boy she had ever met.
Elizabeth leaned back in her chair and sipped her tea. “I went to school with John Knight. He was a few years older, but I knew who he was. He was so handsome, just like his son.” Elizabeth smiled as she visited her memories. “He was a bit of a troublemaker back then, but it was his mischievous youth to blame, nothing serious. He just made a lot of parents nervous.” Elizabeth winked. “Shortly after he graduated high school I heard he met a girl named Karen and he never looked back. They were married after they dated for a couple of years. John had developed a name for himself as a talented carpenter. He used to make the most gorgeous furniture. It wasn’t long after they got married that she became pregnant with their first child but unfortunately after Damon was born news of her depression spread. The family struggled with it and it took its toll on all of them, even that poor baby never knew his mother’s love because the depression robbed her of everything. Eventually she took her own life.” Elizabeth shook her head sadly. “John and Damon found her when they came home from the store. She had taken a whole bottle of pills. Young Damon was only three at the time.”
Adalynne couldn’t help the gasp that escaped her as she listened to the heartbreaking story.
“That child acted out in every imaginable way. No one could get through to that beautiful boy until one day when he was about six years old, his hatred and rebellion dissipated and he gained focus and respect for others. He was still haunted, though. No one knew what happened to him to make the change, but it gave everyone hope for his wellbeing. He wouldn’t let anyone close to him; his father either. They closed themselves in and lived in torment. His father turned to the bottle to ease his sadness and it wasn’t long before everyone suspected that John took his frustrations out on Damon. Many times over the years Damon came to school covered in bruises but he denied everything. Always coming up with an excuse and since no one could prove it they were left to watch the family fall into the darkness of despair. Many people believe he blames his son for his wife’s death.”
Adalynne’s phone rang, pulling her from Elizabeth’s shocking story. “Go ahead and answer your phone,” Elizabeth insisted when Adalynne choose to ignore it.
“Hi, Carmen.”
“Adalynne, I’m glad I caught you.” Carmen’s voice sounded full of worry. “Your mother didn’t get up this morning so I went to check on her. She never sleeps in, so I thought maybe she was sick or something. When I went to check on her I knew…your mother is finally grieving, Addie. She needs you. She won’t get out of bed and refuses to eat.” Carmen’s tone was worried. Carmen’s loyalty was unwavering even when it came to Adalynne’s mother, who Adalynne felt didn’t always deserve it.
“I’m on my way,” Adalynne said quic
kly before hanging up.
“Is everything okay?” Elizabeth noticed Adalynne’s tone.
“My mother needs me,” Adalynne informed her while she gathered her things and headed out the door. She took a quick glance up the street and realized the habit she had formed that she wasn’t even aware of before Elizabeth brought it up—she was drawn to Fox’s house. Even though she knew he no longer lived there, it was still a place she associated with him and therefore she felt drawn to it just like she did to him.
When Adalynne arrived at her mother’s house, Carmen was waiting for her at the door, wringing her apron in her hands. “I didn’t know what to do, Addie. She won’t let me help her.”
“Thanks for calling, Carmen. Is she still in bed?” Adalynne asked, taking off her jacket and shoes.
“Yes, dear.” Carmen nodded.
When Adalynne arrived at her mother’s bedroom door, she knocked quietly and then opened it, not waiting for an answer. She approached the bed and noticed her mother’s form buried under the covers. She looked so small in the large bed. Adalynne’s mother opened her eyes and looked at her but didn’t say anything. Her eyes were swollen and her hair in a disarray from a restless sleep. It was strange to see her so vulnerable. She had always seen her mother so composed and now she looked broken curled up in front of her. She now knew why everyone was so concerned for her when she was suffering the same torment.
Adalynne slid in the bed beside her and reached up and brushed the hair from her mother’s face. She knew all too well the sorrow her mother was feeling. The memory of the pain was still fresh in her mind.
“I’m here.” She smiled softly at her mother. Her mother’s tears started anew and Adalynne held her until her mother’s breathing became slow and steady as sleep overcame her. Her mother had stayed in a state of denial so long that Adalynne had wondered if she would ever let herself face the loss. Even though Adalynne knew her mother was suffering right now, she knew it was important to finally start the healing process, like it had been for her. It was something they would both struggle with for the rest of their lives.