Darkness of Light

by Gina Kincade

  “No!” She screamed as a finger ran up the inside of her thigh.

  “No,” the scarred man agreed. “We need to get that bite tied up. Still, you are giving a nice show.”

  Brandon growled.

  “Shut it. You get to feel it, lucky bastard. Now move.”

  Brandon lurched into a more fluid motion. Unable to run with Rev astride his back, he was able to walk in a quick lope.

  Rev couldn’t see the pack behind her, but the female came toward the front where she could lead the way. She didn’t know where they were going, or how long it would take to get there, but it was too far for her. Light-headed with overwhelming fatigue, darkness eating at the edges of her gaze, she drifted off before they emerged from the forest.

  Chapter Five

  REV WOKE WITH A START. She was on her back on a bed, looking up at a plain, white ceiling. Some light filtered through the window, but it was red. Dawn or sunset. Without knowing how long she had slept, she couldn’t say which.

  A chair creaked and the scarred man rose, coming to her bedside. He perched on the edge of the mattress.

  “Enjoying your taste?” he asked, lifting the blanket from her legs. She felt air on her bare skin and pulled her legs together, trying to shield herself.

  He grabbed the ankle of her injured leg. “How does it feel?” He ran his hand down her leg, stopping at a bandage.

  “I don’t feel it at all.”

  “Perfect. I’m sorry for biting you. I thought you were normal deer. If I’d known, I’d have used more tongue.”

  “What are you going to do with me?”

  “Do? Well, since Trix stitched you up, we’re waiting a day or two to make sure it’s not infected. I’m not rabid, but bites are always nasty wounds for infection.” He let go of her leg and pulled the blanket over her again.

  “Why don’t I have any clothes? Surely Trix has something that would fit me.”

  He shrugged. “You’ve been all bundled up since we got you down here. Didn’t see the need.” He took her wrist and turned her arm over. He tapped the inside of her elbow. “You let us know when it starts to hurt. You can have another dose.”

  She pulled her arm back. “You drugged me?”

  He laughed, throwing back his head. “You were screaming before we doped you. You were eager to go back to sleep so quickly.”

  “I don’t want any more.”

  “We’ll see. You’re probably hungry. I’ll go find something.”

  “Wait.”

  “Yes, Two-point...Rev?”

  “What is your name?”

  “Stang.”

  “No, it’s not.”

  He smirked. “It’s Stan, but that’s lame. Call me Stang and I won’t call you Two-point-oh. Deal?”

  “Deal, Stang.”

  “I’ll be right back.”

  ONCE SHE’D FINISHED eating, she lay sated but unconsciously rubbing the top of her injured thigh. She could feel the fire growing in the back, right where the cut was.

  “Brandon,” Stang called, and one of his muscled companions, the one who had carried her here, came in. “You got it ready?”

  “Shit, no, I didn’t know you wanted it so soon. Gimme a minute.”

  Rev thought she knew what he was doing in the other room. She grabbed for Stang’s hand. “I don’t need it. It just burns a bit. It’s nothing.”

  “It’ll help you sleep, Rev. You need that, or you’ll go crazy locked in here.”

  “Locked?”

  Brandon came back with a loaded syringe before Stang answered her. He palmed the needle. “Hold her. She’s going to fight it.”

  Damn right she was. She pulled her arm across her chest and started to roll onto it. Brandon was much too strong and nearly rolled her right out of the bed, pulling in the opposite direction. She still held it tight to her body, and he put a knee on her shoulder, holding it in place while he pried at her arm. His knee slid down onto her bicep and she felt the blood flow cut off from her fingers.

  Stang tapped a few times and then stuck the needle in.

  “No,” she whimpered.

  “Shhh, sleep, Rev. You’ll be all better and out of here soon.”

  Her vision swam and Stang’s voice seemed as far away as Grandma, Lucius, and Kerwin. She spun and floated, the drug doing its best to rewire her brain. She was still cognizant enough to hear his last words.

  “And you’ll take our supply with you.”

  Chapter Six

  REV SAT UP IN BED, staring at the traitor door. She was well enough to walk to it, now, but all her yanking and shoving didn’t budge it an inch. Soon someone would come with food and another dose of heroin. She was actually looking forward to that, which scared the shit out of her. The pain in the back of her leg was tiny, but it seemed to buzz like a swarm of mosquitoes in her head. The drugs would destroy that swarm.

  Tap. Tap. Tap-tap. Rev turned to look at the tiny window, too small for her to climb out, so she hadn’t paid it any mind. Now she stood on her bed to see a hawk and owl outside. Grinning, she slid the glass aside and punched at the screen until it pulled free on the edges. The birds struggled through the small opening and landed as full-grown women, both as naked as Rev. One was Flo, the other, Jenna. She’d wondered who exactly they were.

  Flo hugged her. “We’re here, love. The boys are coming in the other way.”

  There was a loud scuffling in the next room, which was overshadowed slightly by the bang as Jenna kicked out the door. Something Rev longed to do but required balancing on a bad leg.

  In the room, a lynx and badger attacked three wolves. One of the wolves had a distinctive scar down the left side of his snout. Jenna and Flo took wing again, using talons to add fresh wounds to the old one.

  Rev stared in disbelief. The birds worked as a pair, so she wasn’t surprised they were a fair match for the wolf, but the badger, half the size of the wolf he fought, was pure violence, claws and teeth gripping and tearing until the wolf backed up. Both badger and lynx were bloodied, but they seemed unperturbed by that fact, taking skin and fur off their opponents.

  A thunderous bear roar bellowed from upstairs and then a distinctive voice could be heard above the din. “Lucius, Kerwin, stop.”

  Another deep voice boomed. “Wolves! Down!”

  All three wolves went down on their bellies. Stang turned human again and ran up the stairs. Kerwin and Lucius followed suit, but the birds continued to circle, guarding Rev.

  Curious, Rev couldn’t stay put. She followed up the stairs and found Ben standing toe-to-toe with an older man that might be Stang’s father.

  “She came into our territory.”

  “And you held her hostage.”

  “We gave her a place to heal.”

  “When were going to let her go?”

  Stang answered. “Day after tomorrow.”

  “Well, we’ll take her now.”

  “Not so quick, Ben. You still invaded. A price must be paid for that.”

  Ben hung his head. “Yes. Lucius, Kerwin, take her home. I’ll settle this.”

  Both fought to remain, their arguing word unintelligible, but Ben rose to his full height and boomed. “Go home!”

  Frightened by that roar, Rev spun and darted for the nearest door. As soon as she had it opened, she lost her blankets, falling to all fours and running.

  “Rev! Stop!”

  Kerwin’s voice tugged at her. More than Lucius', which she heard often, Kerwin’s made her pause. He kept his distance.

  Looking toward him, she could see the old farmhouse with the forest closing in on all sides. A single, overgrown lane ended where vehicles had parked.

  “Follow me.” He dropped into the badger again, waddling past her. He broke into a run that was less than half the speed of the deer. Rev kept her pace slow, following far enough back that her deer didn’t spook.

  She had so much more control now. The deer was in her head, its instincts ready to swamp her own, but without a distinct threat to trigg
er fight or flight, she could use her will to direct the animal. In addition to keeping her pace slow, she tested her senses. Her eyesight seemed a bit better than normal and she could smell so many more odors and distinguish them. Her ears pricked at a soft rustle and she turned to see Lucius' lynx emerge. The leaves stilled almost immediately and Rev knew she wouldn’t have heard that if she were still human.

  Lucius, unlike Kerwin, tested her control, coming close enough that the deer seemed to take over. Rather than try to pull it back, she threw herself into the run and collapsed to the ground when one of two legs was unable to hold her up.

  The badger and lynx came closer. Rev’s nakedness in front of them didn’t bother her until the badger was close enough that she could see it had Kerwin’s deep dark eyes.

  She reached for her throat, where the pendant had hung and tried to imagine herself as the deer. Her animal eluded her, making her angry. The buzzing in her head, resulting from missing a hit of heroin, compounded and she started crying.

  The cousins shifted back to human form. “Shh. It’s okay, Rev.” Lucius reached out unhurriedly, his fingers finding her cheek and brushing stray tendrils of her hair back from her face.

  She flinched away from the light contact, and Lucius pulled his hand back, pain and hurt reflected in his eyes.

  Kerwin sat behind her, pulling her into a sitting position against his warm chest. He smoothed his hand over her head, effectively petting her like he would a wounded, frightened animal, and rocked her soothingly back and forth.

  Tension melted, her instincts calming with the motion, and the tears doubled. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to run away. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt. I don’t understand any of it.”

  Lucius inched closer, grasping her hand in his, his thumb brushing over the back of her knuckles. “It’s okay, Rev. Everything is going to be fine. When we get home, we can help you, explain. But we didn’t come in vehicles, so we don’t have another way to return.”

  “Give her a minute,” Kerwin said, still stroking her head. “This is more than anger. What’s wrong?”

  “They—they drugged me. I didn’t ask for it, but they did it anyway. My head is killing me and my leg is starting to hurt again.” She covered her face with her hands. “I can’t believe I’m addicted. That can’t be right. I’ve never done drugs.”

  “Hey, hey.” Lucius pulled her hands down. “You had no choice in that and you haven’t been doped that long. We’ll help you. We’ll get you back to normal.”

  Desperate to hide her face, she turned her face toward Kerwin, pressing her tear-streaked face into his chest hair. He whispered soothing sounds.

  By the time she’d calmed down, Lucius had left. “Oh, no. I didn’t hurt his feelings, did I?” She looked up into Kerwin’s dark eyes.

  “No. He just felt powerless. So do I. It sucks.” He moved his hand to touch her pendant. “Do you think you can try again?”

  She snuffled and nodded. Pushing back from him, she held the golden deer and squeezed her eyes shut.

  “You did it.”

  She opened her eyes and found he was right. She still had no idea how she’d done it, but she stood on all fours, her snout lifted to the air and white tail flicking. Kerwin was shrinking beside her, and then badger led her home.

  “GRANDMA? ARE YOU OKAY?” Rev hurried through the door, eager to close it behind her. She stood naked on the landing, thankful she had managed to shift without any hassle on her doorstep. Gripping the deer at her neck, she yanked it, breaking the chain. She dropped the talisman on the table, happy if she never changed shape again.

  “Reverie!” Grandma hobbled as quickly as she could from her bedroom. Rev caught up and stopped her, enveloping her in a tight hug.

  “I was so scared. I don’t know what’s happening but I want to go home.”

  “Shh, you’re home now.”

  “No.” She backed up enough to meet Grandma’s milky blue eyes. “I want to go home. This place is too weird, too crazy.” She shook her head violently, unable to rid herself of the buzzing in her ears. “I want to go home.”

  “Come here, Rev.” Grandma inched to the couch, leaning on Reverie to manage. Rev’s leg throbbed but it held them both for those few steps.

  “Where is it?” Grandma pushed back her hair to look at her throat. “What have you done with it?”

  “It’s on the table. It’s yours. I don’t want it.”

  “No, Rev, it's yours. It's meant for you. Oh, dear girl, you can’t go back, not really.”

  “No, no, no.” Rev gripped her hair, tugging on it. “That can’t be right. There has to be a way to stay human.”

  Grandma shifted, pulling Rev further onto the couch and cradling her head on her breast. “Sweetie, cry it out. Let it go for now. When you’ve calmed down, you’ll understand.”

  Rev cried, wailed, gripping Grandma’s nightdress in her fists. “The wolves, they caught me. They fed me drugs. I can’t think anymore.”

  “Oh, dear. You’ll be okay. We’ll get past that. The dragon will know what to do.”

  Rev sniffled and remembered the red lizard with wings. “The dragon? Who is he?”

  “All the Chows are dragons. Jiao is the better with medicine. She’ll have something to make the next week easier.”

  For the first time since the birds had appeared at the window, Rev felt exhaustion swamp her. She’d been running on pure adrenaline, panicked since then. Her eyes drifted closed and her full weight fell on Grandma.

  “Go to bed, Rev. Everything will make more sense tomorrow. I’ll call Jiao now.” She pushed Rev to her feet, following by bracing herself on the back of the couch.

  Rev knew she should help Grandma back to bed, but she couldn’t keep her eyes open and her bad leg kept folding when she put weight on it. Resigned, and leaving Grandma to use furniture to make her way around, Rev went straight to her bedroom, flopping onto the fluffy mattress and falling asleep moments later.

  Chapter Seven

  “ARE YOU SURE SHE WON’T stay?”

  “She is so scared right now that I can’t imagine her staying for anything.”

  “Not even for Lucius and Kerwin? They both wanted to be here.”

  “No, keep them out. She needs to solve this herself without any mate nonsense to complicate her judgment. That’s impaired enough.”

  Rev could hear the female voices and recognized Grandma’s. They were in the room, watching her sleep. She was torn between wanting to hear more and letting them know she was listening.

  “That won’t be a problem.” The third voice had a thick Chinese accent. “It is only in her head. Good that we got her back when we did or it could have been worse, harder for her.”

  “How is Ben managing?”

  “Not well.”

  “He should have let one the boys take it for him. He’s supposed to be leading us, not diving in front of bullets.”

  “From what I saw he didn’t even stop to think about it.”

  “Fool man.”

  They quieted then, and Rev assumed she wouldn’t learn any more of what had gone on after she'd run from the farmhouse. She blinked, her eyes adjusting to the daylight filtering through the curtains. She was in a thin t-shirt atop her bedding. The heat made covers unneeded and unwanted.

  “Rev? How are you feeling?” Grandma sat in a chair at the foot of the bed. Reaching out, she squeezed Rev’s bare toes. Right of the chair stood Jenna, Flo on the left, and the Chinese woman, Jiao, was at her side, removing a wet cloth from her brow.

  “Better. My head still feels like there is a swarm of bees in it, but my leg doesn’t hurt anymore.” She looked down and noticed the bandage was gone.

  “Yes. It heals quickly.” Jiao rolled her knee out so she could look at the scabbed mark. Rev sat up to see it as well. It wasn’t nearly as bad as she’d thought despite how much it had bled.

  “Rev, this is Jiao. Jenna tells me you’ve already met her.”

  Rev nodded. “Yes, it’s good
to see you again.” Looking down, she noticed the pendant hanging from her neck. “You put this on me?” She grabbed and yanked, but the chain didn’t snap. It was thicker than before and cut into her skin.

  “Stop that! Fool girl. You need that. When you’re as old as me, you can go without it for a few weeks, but we need them.” Grandma pulled hers out from under her collar and let it hang over top of her shirt.

  Jenna took over the explanation. “Without it, you will never feel quite whole. I know you planned to leave here, and when we met there was still a chance you might. Now that you’ve shifted, however, you’ll always be one of us. I know that doesn’t come easily. Penny has told us how completely you’ve rejected it.” Jenna reached around and opened the clasp. “Leave it off for a day and you will understand.”

  Rev scowled at all of the women. “I don’t want to be one of you. I want to go home.”

  “I’m sorry, Reverie.” Grandma pushed herself up bit by bit from the chair, clearly still having her own difficulties. “I knew this might happen when you volunteered to help me. I'd hoped it wouldn’t, but from the evening you arrived, we’ve known.”

  Rev wanted to fight, to push back, but Grandma looked so weak, now leaning heavily on Flo. She couldn’t take this out on her. “How?”

  “The boys wouldn’t have imprinted on you as mate if you weren’t one of us.”

  Jenna wasn’t protected like Grandma. Reverie had no compunctions about hitting the woman. “No! I’m no one’s mate! I’m not an animal!” She shoved Jenna hard, the woman slamming into the wall. Rev squeezed past her, running to the door and out. When would the next bus come through Littleton? She would be on it and leave this primal town in her dust.