A Menu For Loving

by Olivia Gaines

  “Did I mention he was white?” she said to her sister with her face still kissing the table.

  Gloria jumped up and started running around the kitchen hooting. “Oh hell yeah! I will be here. Bright and early.”

  Jennifer raised her head, shaking it no.

  Her sister was bobbing her tight afro up and down, “Oh yeah. I can’t wait, Jenny. A reverse guess who’s coming to dinner? This is going to be too good.”

  Then she was hit with a brilliant idea. “I’ll invite them Sunday for dinner if you bring your girl.”

  Gloria stopped laughing. Jennifer stuck her hand out for a shake. “Deal?”

  “No. I wasn’t part of this equation. Ain’t no deal!”

  “I will go you one better, big sis. I’ll even put you together a tray of food for your Saturday night poetry slam ... if you bring your special lady on Sunday to dinner,” Jennifer said, knowing it would reel her in.

  “You will cater my poetry slam on Saturday?” Gloria asked incredulously.

  “No, I will provide you with a chafing dish with some meatballs on one side, some wings on the other and a tray of veggies with some dip,” Jennifer clarified.

  They stood in the kitchen, staring at each other, when their father walked in through the back door. He looked at Gloria first, then at Jennifer, who looked pretty rough. He wanted to say something, but was uncertain what they were in the midst of ... a fight?

  “Ladies,” he said with some hesitation.

  Jennifer took the lead, still staring at Gloria. “Daddy, we’re having guests for dinner on Sunday. I’ll bring Tony and his daughter to meet you and Gloria is bringing her significant other.”

  Johnny Taylor was never a man to mince words. “Did my doctor call and tell y’all I‘m dying or something?”

  Sharing news with your family about your personal life is always difficult, especially when you are uncertain how the changes you were planning to make will be accepted. It’s not as if your changes will directly impact who and what they are, but oddly enough, many react as if it will. Any conversation with Jacqueline Peay felt that way.

  At times, Tony would avoid any conversation with her about personal choices and changes in his life. Well, there hadn’t been any real changes in 12 years, but the last few seemed to rock his mother to the core. He and his sister both felt that communicating with the woman was like standing on the South Rim of the Grand Canyon yelling to the North Rim about what was happening in their lives. No matter how much he tried to talk, it appeared easier to simply fill the canyon with dirt, a teaspoon of loose soil at a time. There was a great deal of loose soil hanging about and it was time to make use of it, or at least try to squeeze some sense out of it.

  It was now Thursday. Tino had come to town on Saturday. His sister was supposed to pick Sasha up from school yesterday, but instead sent a message for the child to ride the bus home. Cleo confessed that she had to run to see about their mother, who was complaining of being dizzy. A little tidbit she had failed to tell him about, hence, the very severe episode of coitus interruptus and potentially scarring his daughter for life. He tried to handle it well, but there was so much flying at them at once. He didn’t want Jennifer scared off, but he always didn’t want his daughter traumatized.

  “Mom,” he said as he brought her a cup of tea. “Is everything okay? Cleo said you were experiencing some dizziness yesterday.”

  “Yes, I just had a moment and I couldn’t seem to get it together to get out of the house,” she said as she stared into the cup.

  In his childhood, he could remember several of her episodes when she was unable to get it together. The stints would last anywhere from a couple of hours to, one time, a couple of months. Ironically, she seemed to get better once their father died. The bouts became fewer and the birth of Sasha gave her something new to focus on. Her granddaughter she seemed to lavish with love and attention. Something she rarely did with them as children. This was not to say that she was a bad mother, nor a neglectful one, just cool. Dinner was always on time. The house was always clean. Laundry was always done, and the fridge was always full with home cooked meals. If he could put his finger on the perfect description of his mother, she was like a Stepford wife. Anything out of sorts put her out of sorts. Tino had put her out of sorts.

  Yet, in Tony’s mind, family was everything to him, but so much needed to be sorted out. He was about to embark on a new journey in his life and he needed to beef up his relationship with his family before he brought Jennifer into it. No matter how you sliced the roast, Tino was still on the side and not part of the main course. “Mom, is this about Tino?”

  Her eyes were distant as she searched his face. She gave no answer.

  “He said if his arrival causes you any undue pain, he won’t bother you, but he would like to get to know you,” Tony told her with a low voice.

  Jacqueline jumped up from the couch, spilling her tea and breaking the cup. She looked as if she wanted to take off running, but was uncertain in which direction to flee. Tony pulled her into his arms, resting her head against his broad chest. “It’s okay, Mom. If you’re not ready to tell him anything you don’t have to. He will understand.”

  Her voice was low. “Why now, Anthony? Why has he come forward now? All these years, and now ...”

  Tony could almost feel the thudding of her heart as he held her close. “Because he is seeing someone special and he wants to introduce her to his whole family, Mom.” He took a deep breath. Now is as good a time as any. “I’m seeing someone as well whom I would like you to meet.”

  She pulled away from him, with squinted eyes, staring at him. “You’re dating that chef that did Sasha’s party?”

  “Yes, I am. How did you know?”

  The frown on her face was one of disgust. “I saw how you were looking at her with lust in your eyes.”

  Lust. Well, it probably was. “It’s something much more than lust, Mom. I am looking to make her a permanent part of our lives?”

  “Lust and fornication will not make a good marriage, Anthony Quinn Peay. And you do not have a good track record with women,” she said as she shook her finger at him.

  He was shocked. “What track record with women? There was a girl in high school and Sasha’s mother. There haven’t been any women,” he told her. At least none who were permanent.

  Jacqueline flopped down on the couch. Who am I to judge? Her emotions were all over the place. “Will I get more grandbabies to love and care for?”

  He sat beside her, looking at her tentatively and worrying too much about the mood swing. “Yes, from me and Tino, probably.” She jumped when he said his name.

  “Between you and the chef and Tino, I am going to have a house full of little black grandbabies,” she said with a flat face.

  Tony stared at her in disbelief. Was she implying...? He had noticed Tino’s coloring, but thought it was a really good tan.

  “Mom, is Tino’s father a black man?”

  She began to rock back and forth on the couch, hugging herself and retreating into that dark place where she would hide from them and the world. Tony was not going to allow her to leave the table without first cleaning her plate. “Mom, stay with me. Talk to me.”

  “He raped me,” she said as the light in her eyes dimmed. Jacqueline had withdrawn to her dark place.

  Garden Salad...

  Sometimes, no matter how much dressing you put on a salad, it is still a pile of vegetables with a sprinkling of crunchy nuts. Asking someone to be a part of something that was guaranteed to flush your colon was a difficult task, but Tony P had waited patiently for many years for the right woman to come along. She wandered into that bar and looked him in the eyes and said I need you to be my man. Everything in him responded to her soft plea. Whether it was what he had prayed for or if it was just something he was hopeful about, she was there.

  Once he held her in his arms on the dance floor she felt right. In his hotel room, she was the perfect fit. Being exactly what he needed
when he needed it was even better. He had no doubts in his mind that Jennifer Taylor was the woman for him. It was now a matter of time to make those words he often asked her for to become real. Starting today, he would work on making a life with her – a very happy one filled with love and affection. The children they would have would grow up in a house filled with love and friendliness. After speaking with his mother yesterday, he was in dire need of a hug. He knew just the woman to give him a cuddle and who also made his pants feel tight and his heart all squishy.

  It was just before lunch when he pulled into the parking lot of the Pretentious Puss and parked next to her Chevy. In his hand was a folder of his preliminary layout of her new menu for summer and his ticket to walk through those doors. The jangling of the doorbell had her come from the behind the bar to greet him with that smile that made his pulse race. “Hey, you,” she said casually as if she were about to buy T-shirts at the flea market.

  “Hey back,” he said as his eyes wandered to that beautiful mouth that he loved kissing. He held up the folder.

  “What you got there, Tony P?” she asked as she eyed the manila file.

  “It will cost you a kiss to see what’s inside,” he said playfully.

  He watched her walk slowly over to him and grab the front of his shirt, pulling him forward. “Are you telling me you only want one?”

  He could not stop the grin that covered his face as he moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue, getting his puckers kissing ready. “Yep, just one.”

  Jennifer leaned in closer and placed a big, noisy, wet kiss on his cheek and bounded backwards grabbing the folder at the same time. “There ya go!”

  She was giggling as she held the file folder, waving it like a fan. Tony stood stil, simply watching her, his chest swelling with pride that she had chosen to give herself to him, twice. A slow smile crept across his face. “You are so lovely. I ...” He stopped speaking.

  Jennifer’s mouth was twisted as they gazed at each other. She spoke first. “You know, tomorrow is my Saturday off and I was wondering ...” Jennifer nibbled on her bottom lip. “... If I could take you on a date?”

  His eyebrows shot up. “You? Take me on a date? Shouldn’t that be the other way around?”

  She tried her best to remember what it was like to be and feel sexy. Tony made her feel alive, but she still had to work on her sexiness. She pulled out of her repertoire of sexy moves, or what little she had left, and moved towards him slowly, the tip of her tongue stuck in the corner of her mouth. “I made the first move in that bar ...”

  “And I finished the evening,” he said, still rooted to his spot. Jennifer was not going to let up. If they were to have a future, like he said the first night they met, she needed to be comfortable with his touch. In the open. Where everyone could see. Especially her dad and her sister.

  “I don’t know how this one will finish, but I want you and Sasha to come over for dinner on Sunday to meet my dad and my sister,” she said as she fingered the buttons on his shirt.

  He toyed with a strand of her hair that had come from under her chef’s headscarf. “Saturday night can’t be too late. I have to teach Sunday school.”

  That was not what she was expecting to hear. “You teach Sunday school?”

  “Yes, every Sunday since I was 15. Then after church, I go to my mom’s and have lunch with her.” He said it for two reasons. The first was that he needed to gauge her reaction, and secondly, he wanted her to know that this was something he would want her to become a part of as well.

  It was unsaid, but Jennifer knew what he was implying. “Sundays are my day off, like I said before. I mean, I don’t teach Sunday school, but I am in church with my dad on most Sundays, then an early supper.”

  Tony was still twirling the strand of hair in his fingers. “So where are you taking me on this date Saturday night?”

  “I’m still thinking about it. I plan to surprise you,” she told him.

  Tony pretended to be girly, batting his lashes. “What should I wear? Something sexy? A suit? A tie?”

  “Be comfortable.” Then she remembered the folder in her hand. “What is this?” She opened the manila file and saw the newly designed menu and the beautiful colors along with the logo of a pretentious cat. Her mouth dropped. “You did this for me?”

  The joy in her eyes was all he needed. “That feeling that you are experiencing... that is how I feel every time I am with you.”

  Her eyes drifted up from the papers to his face. “Wow, you are good,” she said with a grin.

  “Yes, I am. And now you know, too,” he grinned at her. “Jennifer, I will give you a good life. We will be good together.”

  “I know, Tony. I have no doubts about it.” And truth be told, she didn’t. She only needed to figure out how to make it all work.

  His hand went to her cheek. “Anytime ... any place ... any moment of the day or night, I will be yours,” he told her.

  When Tony arrived home, he was surprised to find his sister, Cleo, waiting for him. She had that look on her face where he had either done something to tick her off or she wanted to talk to him about Sasha. Cleo was a special sort of woman who was more like their mother than either woman cared to admit. His sister was more vocal about her emotions and her sense of right and wrong, whereas his mother would say one sentence and give you that look. Unlucky for him, Cleo started by giving him that look, then chose more than one sentence to try and guilt him into seeing things her way. He hated that. He never gave in out of principle, but she still continued to try.

  “I went by Mom’s this morning and she was in one of her states. I had to get her cleaned up and get her into some fresh clothes,” she said as she gave him that look. He knew the next question and he was thinking of the right words to explain where they were in this impasse called Valentino.

  “Yes, we had a talk yesterday. Mom is going to need to have some professional counseling,” he said flatly.

  “We have counseling set up at the church ...” she started to say. Also like their mother had been, Cleo was married to the pastor of their church. His father had taken it over after their father, Isaiah, had retired. Waldo Jones was a dull man with little to no imagination. Not only in his sermons, but also in life. He never even saw the humor in Cleo’s name after she married him, as she became Cleopatra Jones. He only commented, “Never saw the movie.” Tony couldn’t complain. The man was good to his sister, as well as to Sasha.

  “Cleo, for what our mother has experienced, she needs to be guided back by a professional counselor,” he told her.

  Always the church first lady, Cleo was adamant. “The only thing she needs to guide her back is Jesus!”

  “She can’t be guided back to Jesus if she can’t see Him, Cleo. Mom needs to have her path cleared first before she makes the journey,” he said as he stared at her face. It was the first time she didn’t argue with him. “She underwent something horrific and she never told anyone.”

  Cleo’s mouth was twisted in disbelief. “What could be so horrible? The woman barely left the house except to go to church, the fabric or grocery store. Until Daddy started taking us out on Sundays after church, she never went to restaurants. She made all her clothes, and mine. She let Daddy shop for you. I think she is just being overly dramatic to get attention because she is lonely.”

  His sister was stubborn. That trait she took from their father. And it did not matter how much was placed before her, she still would only pick and choose what she believed she knew well. Even when they went out to eat at those horrible all you can eat buffets their daddy was so fond of, she still would only have a garden salad sprinkled with sunflower seeds. He ruefully acknowledged the obvious – that, like her husband Waldo, his sister had no imagination.

  Tony was about to jolt her into reality. “We have a brother. His name is Valentino. He is two years younger than me and two years older than you. He is looking forward to meeting you. Also, I am seeing someone. I plan to marry her and she is black. Oh
yeah,” he paused to drive home how much she did not know. “So is our brother.”

  He left Cleo in his kitchen as she stood there, her mouth opening and closing like a fish gasping for air. It was the wrong way to tell her but sometimes he was just fed up with her thinking she knew it all. The other really ugly part he would never divulge to Tino or to his sister. And he would roast in hell before he allowed any of those women in the church to know such a horrendous thing had happened to their mother, nor would he allow his sister to make their mom the topic of conversation at the local church social.

  From what he had seen in Jacqueline Peay’s behavior, she had been victimized enough.

  Puffed Pastry...

  It had been so long since Tony had been on a date, he didn’t quite know what to do or where to start. He knew he needed a haircut and possibly a new shirt. He was at a real loss. He hadn’t dated in years and his clothing, he also feared was out of date. Since he worked from home, he really wasn’t keenly aware of the latest trends or men’s fashion. He would purchase new suits for church, but those types of things have been never in or out of fashion. He called Raheem.

  “Hey. I need your help,” he told his longtime friend.

  “Sure, what’s up?”

  “I have a date tonight with Jen and I have nothing to wear,” he said solemnly. “I mean I normally just go to Penny’s or Sears and get something, but I dunno... I guess I want to wear something hip and cool.”

  Raheem was smiling. It was good to see his friend excited about something in his life. Lord knows it had been a long road. “Where are you taking her?” Raheem asked him.

  “I’m not sure where we’re going. Actually, she is taking me out,” he confessed.

  “I like this woman. I like her a lot!” he told Tony as he grabbed his keys and headed for the door. “I’ll be there in 15 minutes.”

  Jennifer was in the kitchen loading the serving pans for Gloria’s event when her sister walked through the back door. It was already five and she still had to shower and get dressed for her date with Tony. She was grinning as she covered the pans of chicken and meatballs. I have a date.