Driven by Desire

by Ambrielle Kirk

  Knowing that her friend spoke the truth, Tanya collapsed on the bed and looked up at the drab white ceiling of her drab normal apartment. “Maybe I just need some time to get my shit together, Zaira.”

  “Don’t play games with a good man, Tanya.”

  Chapter Twelve

  MARCUS

  Two days later…

  As Marcus’ gaze dropped once again to the box sitting opened atop the desk in his home office, he ground his teeth in anger once again. In one hand, he held the TV remote control and his other hand was balled into a fist. His blood continued to boil despite the fact that the TV screen had gone black.

  He swallowed down his angry, still not believing what she’d just seen on the screen. The woman that he thought was innocent and would never use him as others have done in the past wasn’t that innocent after all.

  “Isn’t it ironic?” he mumbled, as he tossed the remote control on the desk next to the boxes.

  The package had arrived shortly before lunch by private carrier. The shock came only after he realized what it was and whom it had come from. The return address had been from a New York residence. He’d thought nothing of it before opening it up since he had several business partners and acquaintances in New York City. The contents had turned out to be the eye-opener of the century.

  He picked up the note that had been included with the DVD contained in the large package. “THANKS FOR KEEPING HER OCCUPIED WHILE I WAS AWAY.” The message was printed, not handwritten. Nothing else was included besides packing peanuts.

  “Bastard.” He crumbled the paper in his fist and tossed it in the waste basket.

  Marcus leaned over his desk and picked up the picture frame containing a picture of him and Tanya in Ocho Rios inside a photo booth. He looked happy, and even more importantly he wasn’t faking it. The beautiful women in the picture made him happy. Her smile could light up any room she entered and the way she carried and respected herself spoke volumes about the kind of person he knew she was inside.

  His heart tightened at the fact that her heart might still belong to another, even after all they’d shared since meeting in Jamaica.

  Marcus’ mind had been made up a long time ago. He knew what he wanted and what he had to do to keep it.

  He settled back in the chair, picked up his cell phone, and made a call.

  ***

  TANYA

  Several hours later…

  The doorbell rang, interrupting Tanya from her job search online. She rarely got visitors out of the norm, so she figured it could only be one of two people. Marcus or Zaira. She uncurled her legs from under her, put her laptop on an end table, and got up to answer the door.

  Her intuition was right. It was Marcus. Standing there like a fine example of a sex god ready to conquer.

  Two days had passed since she’d last spoken with and nearly a week had passed since she’d last seen him. Why her heart skipped a beat now with him there in her doorway, she didn’t know. She didn’t know why her body revealed so much vulnerability. What his presence did confirm, was that she missed him. A lot.

  Marcus leaned against her doorframe when she didn’t invite him inside. “I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time.”

  “Not bad that you’re here, but bad because of what I was doing. Graduation is only months away and I’ve been doing some major job searching,” she replied. “I’ve had a migraine all morning from it.”

  There was some slight hesitation in his demeanor, one that she hadn’t observed before. And today, he looked at her with almost a question on his face. “Would you like to go for a ride? To clear your mind a bit.”

  Tanya bit her bottom lip, hesitating, but a positive reply was right on the tip of her tongue. She wanted this man, even if it cost her her sanity and led her into the risk zone. Like any other Sunday afternoon, he was dressed casually in form-fitting jeans, black T-shirt, and loosely tied Timberland boots. His motorcycle keys hung from the belt loop.

  He must have sensed her hesitation, because he stepped closer to her, waited a few seconds for her resistance, and then embraced her. His strong muscular arms felt heavenly wrapped around her. Her body relaxed, her knees weakened, and she fell deeper into his embrace. His familiar fragrance renewed her, and she suddenly wished that she’d never been so stubborn to deny what she most obviously wanted.

  “What took you so long to come?” she asked before she could stop herself.

  “I wanted to give your space, time to think. I came here to ask you the same thing.”

  She sighed against his chest. “I’m afraid of committing again. And I’m afraid that if I don’t commit, I’ll get another repeat of what happened at the BBQ.”

  “I understand.” He kissed the top of her head. “Let’s ride. Get some fresh air. We can talk about this.”

  She nodded. “Let me get my keys.”

  ***

  They rode for about an hour up and down the Atlanta freeway and within the city limits and suburban areas. He alternated speeds between neck-breaking to monotonously slow. Consequently, she could compare her emotions over the last few weeks to the ever changing pace of the ride.

  Finally, Marcus pulled into a cul-de-sac of townhouses. She’d only been to his home a few times during their first few dates, but she recognized it right before he pulled up into the driveway.

  “I hope you don’t mind. It’s a little closer…and I have something to tell you,” Marcus said, as they slid off the bike and he collected the helmets.

  “As long as you’ve got something to eat inside, I don’t mind at all,” she teased, walking up the sidewalk with him.

  “I can put some steaks on the grill,” he replied, grinning.

  Marcus’ home was the epitome of a bachelor pad with simple furnishings and toned down muted colors. He’d explained earlier that it was actually a rental provided by Svelte until he was able to settle down and buy his own place.

  He threw his keys on an end stand in the foyer and pressed his fingers to the center of her back. “Make yourself at home.” He kissed her against the temple. “I’m going to take the steaks out and grab us something to drink.”

  “Sure.” Tanya took a seat on his leather couch and grabbed a magazine off the coffee table. Once she recalled that they were to have a talk about the relationship, her nervousness set in again.

  “Oh, and before I forget…” Marcus came back around the corner and handed her a key chain with two keys on it. “Keep these with you.”

  “What for?” She accepted the keys, but looked up at him in confusion.

  “A set of keys to get into my house. Just in case you need a change of scenery or if you just want to come visit.”

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  “I do…” he said. “You are the only woman in my life and I want to see more of you each and every day.”

  “Marcus, I…” Tanya blushed, breaking the eye contact.

  “Let me go get those steaks ready and some drinks. We have something to talk about.”

  She swallowed, pushed the keys down into her jeans pocket, and settled back on the couch. The images in the sports magazine she flipped through did nothing to cool her anticipation.

  ***

  “Tanya, I want you to know that I’m in this for the long run.” Marcus set down his beer and turned to face her completely. “The moment I met you back in Ocho Rios, I knew I wanted you and despite how fast we became intimate, it was never about sex for me.”

  Tanya took a sip of the daiquiri. “I guess you know I have reservations already. I’ve only been in one serious relationship prior to you and before that the men all wanted one thing.”

  “You and I share something in common. Maybe more in common, than normal. Becca and I had been off and on for the past three years before we officially broke up. I couldn’t quite pinpoint why it was that I could never commit to her, and then I realized what type of woman she was.” He shook his head. “It took me almost three years to figure out that she was money
hungry and enjoyed having more than a few men in her back pocket.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “In the beginning, our relationship was non monogamous. Open. Which meant we agreed on seeing other people.”

  “How can a relationship like that work?” Tanya asked.

  “It didn’t. Not in the long run. I came to realize that what we had wasn’t a relationship at all. I think Becca got a bit of a rush or confidence booster that she was my main lover and I was hers, like we agreed. I was tired of it, tired of playing around, but Becca convinced me to give her a chance and we promised to stop dating others. Faithfulness is not something Becca was very good at. I don’t think it would have hurt so bad if she hadn’t been sleeping with one of the members of Rugged.”

  “Oh.” Tanya frowned. “You must have had feelings for Becca, then?”

  It took him a while to answer. “There’s affection, lust, and then there’s true love. I’ve grown to learn the difference.”

  “Sorry that happened, but I’m glad you’re being truthful with me.”

  “I can’t control what other people do, but do know that after what happened I made certain she knew that we were through. I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my past when it comes to women, Tanya. I’ve had many, many failed relationships. I played the field because I could and because that’s what I wanted. In the end, there’s no fun in the outcome of it. Broken hearts. Hurt feelings. These things come up to haunt you in future relationships as it has done here with us. You will not be one I fail at keeping. My life is purposeful now with you in it. I can wake up in the morning and know that when I’m with you, everything will be as they should be. I don’t want that feeling to end ever again. When you refused to see me, I experienced what that felt like.”

  “Not only am I an emotional wreck, I’ve got baggage too,” she admitted.

  He arched a brow. “Care to tell me all about it?”

  “Has Zaira told you who Justin is—was I mean?”

  “Why don’t you tell me? I hate gossip and hearsay.”

  She exhaled, but continued to make eye contact with Marcus. “My ex, Justin, used to work for Svelte in the accounting department. I can’t believe you haven’t found that out yet. This is why I had issues with you and I continuing a relationship after Ocho Rios.”

  His brows came together. “Why would you let someone you no longer want in your life dictate your future?”

  She shrugged. “I thought maybe it would be an embarrassment if you found out that the woman you were dating had also been with a past employee.”

  “Sometimes things happen for a reason. We met in Ocho Rios because of the wedding, but I do think that sooner or later, we would have met. This Justin is not the only thing we have in common,” he replied. “I’ve told you this many times, but I don’t give a damn what anyone thinks of me. I’ve gone through that phase earlier in life.” He took her hand. “Why should I care if they didn’t give birth to me, aren’t paying my bills, aren’t fucking me, and aren’t taking care of me?”

  “Okay…”

  “I know exactly what I want. You.” Marcus kissed the back of her hand. “You’re the type of woman that you have for a lifetime. Can you commit to me? Can you commit to us?”

  “You have everything you need versus trying to obtain what you want. You’re already successful, and you’re different, but it will take some time for me give full trust again.”

  “I’ll be patient, Tanya.”

  A long sensuous kiss confirmed their declarations, and Tanya was sure now that she’d found a man who understood her.

  When they pulled apart, Marcus gestured to a package sitting the coffee table. “Now that we have that out of the way, the contents of this box posed no bearing on the decision we made here today because before it ever arrived on my doorstep, I’d already fallen for you. Likewise, what’s in the box never changed my feelings for you.”

  Tanya said, glancing at the box, nervously. “What do you mean?”

  “You ex plays dirty, Tanya.”

  She looked at him in confusion, and shook her head.

  “He still wants you, doesn’t he?” Marcus asked.

  “I don’t know. He’s been calling, but just the other day I had to tell him that I’ve moved on. He was…a little shocked. What’s in the box?”

  “That makes sense.”

  “What makes sense? What are you saying?”

  “Did you make a sex tape with Justin?”

  Her mouth literally dropped to the floor. “What!”

  “That bastard sent me a video tape of you two in bed together.”

  “Oh, my God.” Her heart beat thunderously in her chest. “We…we…earlier, we…”

  Marcus dropped his face in his palm.

  Tanya had no idea that Justin kept a copy of the short recording of them having sex. She didn’t even know he had made a permanent copy of it. “Do you think I cheated on you? This happened when Justin and I first started dating.”

  “I know you didn’t cheat on me. You had shorter hair in the video.” He grabbed both of her hands. “Listen to me. I watched it because I had no idea what it was.”

  Tanya’s face grew heated. “I’m so embarrassed. That idiot. Why did he do this?”

  “I think maybe the point of him doing this was to ruin what we have. From what you’ve told me, he regrets breaking up with you. Do you still have feelings for him?”

  “No.” She shook her head. “It’s over between he and I, but this sounds exactly like something Justin would do. He doesn’t like being crossed.”

  “Well, he’s messing with the right one, because neither do I,” Marcus said, a frank expression on his face.

  “Don’t get involved. Let’s just leave it be and I’m sure he’ll leave it alone.” But how stupid could she have been when she agreed to making a video of them being intimate? “I’m sorry you had to see that.”

  “No need for apologies. At least I understood what you meant the moment you said that you had baggage.”

  “My ex went a little further than yours, don’t you think?”

  “Either way, we’re in this together, and just know that everything will be dealt with. Don’t worry. I know some important people in important places.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “I’ve ties to several business acquaintances in New York, high and low.”

  “Marcus…?”

  “You have better things to do than worry about this, alright?”

  “Alright, but will you at least destroy the DVD?” she asked. “I don’t want to see it. And I don’t want you watching it again or anyone else for that matter.”

  “This won’t ruin our night.” Marcus retrieved the DVD from out of the box and split it in two. “I have the steaks out on the patio, we can make it a date night in, watch some movies, just chill, and maybe I can demonstrate my attempt of a Swedish massage to relieve some of your tension. How about that?”

  She smiled. “You know…I have missed you.”

  Epilogue

  Tanya leaned against the elevator walls waiting for the dial to hit the fifteenth floor. It lugged along slowly despite the fact that the building was nearly deserted after normal business hours. When the buzzer finally chimed and the doors slid open revealing the receptionist area, she stepped inside Svelte Technologies’ corporate suite with a bag of takeout food.

  Save for a few overhead lights over the waiting area, there was no one at the receptionist desk this hour of the evening. They had closed for regular business nearly three hours. Most everyone in the building was gone and from the silence on the floor the Svelte employee’s had gone for the day. Except for Marcus, who was working late.

  Tanya picked the phone on the side of the desk and keyed Marcus’ extension.

  “This is Brooks,” he answered the phone.

  “I’m here.”

  “Good timing,” he said. “I’m in the last office on the right. Three hundred.”

  When she
reached his office, he was seated at his desk over a mountain of paperwork. There were three coffee cups and a bag of trail mix on the desk. With only the dim lights on in the hallways and out into the cubicle areas, he was literally in the dark except for a lamp shining brightly on his desk.

  He eyed her under his dark lashes with an appreciative grin on his face. “I think you wore that dress to distract me from my work.”

  She’d just come from her photo shoot for graduation pictures, so she had no idea that wearing the little black dress could divert Marcus’ attention. But while she was here…

  “Did not,” she teased, coming forward in the office. “I had graduation pictures today. Don’t you remember? I truly see what you mean now when you told me you worked after hours frequently.”

  She sat the bag of Chinese take-out on his desk, and then sauntered over to the long five foot mirror that was attached to a small closet door. She smoothed down the front of her skirt with her palms and shimmied her hips a little to adjust it. “It’s not too tight, is it? I know I’ve gain like five pounds hanging out with you, but I’ve still been going to the gym.”

  “You look sexy. I wouldn’t change a thing about you. Especially not those hips and definitely not that ass. I’d like some of those pictures when you get them, so I can put it here on my desk.”

  Her face grew heated at his compliment. “I’ll think about it.” She turned and moved back to the desk to take out the contents of the bag, placing his Lo Mein noodles down in front of him. “Or I might just make you work for it.”

  He slid his hand gentle around her forearm, and pulled her down to his level to kiss her. “What must I do?”

  “I can think of a dozen ways.”

  “Name one.” His fingers slid alongside the edge of her dress, where it had ridden up against her upper thigh.

  She blushed. “Not here.”

  “Why not?”

  Tanya looked at him cross-eyed. “Are you serious?”