Cocksure

by K. I. Lynn

  “Shh, baby. Don’t cry. Why would you think that?”

  “Because you’re not a one-woman kind of man.”

  He pulls his fingers from me, making me shudder as they graze my clit.

  “Even if we aren’t together, I would always want to be with my child. And even if I didn’t want to be with you, which I do, why would that make you think I wouldn’t want to be a father?”

  I can’t stop the tears, the hiccupping sobs as I hide my eyes behind my hands. This crying can go away. I hate it, and it’s all I seem to be doing lately. That and vomiting, which can also stop.

  “Because why would you want to deal with me for the rest of their life?”

  It’s not until this moment that I realize the insecurity that I’ve been harboring. Inside, I’m still very much the nerdy girl geeking out over her brother’s hot best friend.

  He doesn’t say anything, just stares. It’s unnerving, and I’m about to jump out of the shower and get the fuck out of here and away from this situation I’ve put myself in when he presses his lips to mine and pushes me up against the shower wall.

  I cry out from the cold of the tile hitting my warm skin, but he doesn’t give me time to adjust as his hands grab onto me and pick me up. My legs wrap around his hips, and I can feel his hard cock between us, its length sliding against my slit.

  “You like to pick me up,” I say against his mouth.

  A chuckle leaves him. “Because you’re almost a foot shorter than me. I need those lips closer.”

  “I think you just like throwing me around.”

  “Mmm, pocket-sized for my pleasure.”

  “I’m not that short.”

  “You are to me.”

  He continues to slide against me but doesn’t enter. “Niko, please . . .”

  “What?” He’s grinning at me, knowing full well what I want.

  “Fill me. Please.”

  A growl rumbles in his chest. “First, you need to do something for me.”

  “What?”

  “You need to get all negative thoughts out of that head of yours. Or do I need to fuck them out for you to listen to what I’ve been saying for months.”

  I stare at him, frozen in excitement, in knowing I want him to make good on his threat.

  “Fuck them out it is.”

  With one thrust, he’s inside me, and my head is back against the wall, mouth open.

  Fuck.

  I can’t breathe. Only feel. His thick cock giving me the delicious stretch, filling me completely.

  How did I ever think I could turn this down?

  “Fuck, baby, I never knew it could feel this good,” he says, his teeth scraping along the column of my neck.

  “What?”

  “Being bare, fucking without a condom,” he says the words between thrusts, but I can’t help the way they make me squeeze around him, causing an “Oh, fuck” to leave him. They weren’t meant to be sexy, but somehow, they were.

  “I’m sure you’ve done it before.” With all the women he’s fucked, I can’t be the only one.

  He shakes his head. “No, this is my first time.”

  “Second,” I remind him.

  He lets out a groan and smashes his lips against mine.

  “This is how we should have made a baby,” he says, his hips drilling his cock into me harder.

  “Against a shower wall?”

  “Sober.”

  And I understand. This feeling, this all-consuming desire that is all for him, is so powerful. The raw connection of baser instincts.

  “I’ll make sure you fucking remember how it feels from now on.”

  He pulls me closer, his head buried in my neck as he presses me harder into the wall. Each thrust seems to go deeper, hit harder. My eyes lose focus as I let go and just feel.

  That’s all he will let me do. His hands dig into my ass cheeks, his thumbs around my hips as he moves me up and down his shaft in time with his thrust. Pounding, relentless. Over and over until my breath begins to stutter, eyes rolling back as everything tightens, then abruptly snaps.

  The screams leaving me are echoing around the small bathroom. As I come down, aftershocks rock me, and guttural moans fill my ears.

  I feel each twitch of his cock deep inside me. It’s different than before, unrestrained. His chest heaves with each harsh breath that blows across my skin. The air makes the droplets that have cooled move around my skin, causing goose bumps to pop up.

  Niko blindly reaches to the side to turn the water off, sliding me across cool patches of tile and making me hiss. The water isn’t matched in temperature to the tile, but it’s getting there, the heat waning.

  Once the water is off, Niko locks eyes with me. He hasn’t pulled out.

  “That’s how I’m going to remember it.”

  I blink up at him. I’m still coming down, my brain scrambling to catch up. “Remember what?”

  He cups my cheek, his thumb running across my lower lip. “How we made our baby.”

  Once again, the red glare of Niko’s bedside clock is the first thing I see when I open my eyes. Shit. It’s almost ten thirty at night. I’ve been with Niko for hours and completely lost track of time. The need to flee kicks in and I turn to look at Niko, who’s sleeping soundly next to me.

  We never did get to talk.

  His hair is all over the place, and I have to hold myself back from caressing his face as he sleeps. I don’t want to leave, but I don’t know if I should stay either. Slowly, I try to make my way out of bed in search of my clothes in the living room.

  Where the hell is my bra?

  “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” Niko growls into my ear, making me freeze. His fingers wrap around my waist, pulling me back against his warm chest. “You thinking of running out on me again, Ev? Leaving another fucking Post-it note?”

  Was he ever going to let that go? Then again, he didn’t really know how dependent I was on the yellow sticky notepads.

  “Running? No, not running. It’s called leaving. Going home. You know, your usual?”

  A growl rumbles through him. I’ve done it again, thrown his past in his face. It will be a hard habit to break. Why do I keep doing that?

  “Nothing has been usual since I met you.”

  My heart thumps in my chest. Nothing? That makes me happier than it should. I step away and he lets me go, so I lean over to pick up my panties.

  “Three months.”

  “Three months, what?” I ask, securing one flip-flop.

  “You’re the only woman I’ve been with in three months, Ev. You’re the only one I can get it up for. The only woman I want to get it up for. The only one I even think about.”

  I stop my search and turn to look at him; his expression is solid. He couldn’t be serious, could he? Only me in three months? I know his track record.

  “I don’t bring women back to my place,” he continues, stepping to stand in front of me.

  I shake my head. “You brought me home with you.”

  He pulls me to him, his lips running up the column of my neck, sending tingles across my skin.

  “I don’t sleep with chicks I fuck.”

  “You fell asleep with me.”

  His breath is hot, and his fingers slip around my torso and between my legs.

  “I don’t stay for breakfast.”

  I draw in a breath, my back arching as the few articles of clothing I collected fall back to the ground. His fingers dip inside me, rubbing against my clit with each slow, agonizing stroke.

  “I don’t call, and I don’t text women.”

  “You called and sent me—” He doesn’t let me finish, placing his finger to my lips.

  “But for you,” he says as he pulls me flush to him and grinds his cock against me. “I’ve broken every one of my rules. You know why?”

  My hips move in time with him, a blaze heating me from my core.

  “Got an answer for me, Everly?”

  “N-no.”

  “Be
cause you’re not just some chick.”

  “I’m pregnant with your baby.”

  The thick ridge of his cock rocks against me as his hand grabs my ass, pulling me ever closer.

  “Fuck, it’s so hot when you say it in that fuck-hot sexy voice.”

  A whimper claws its way up my throat, escaping in a stuttered, high-pitched, body-shaking consumption. He’s assaulting me on multiple fronts, chipping away at the emotional walls I’ve built to protect myself.

  A few more hard strokes of his fingers, then they’re gone. He trails his hand up to rest on my abdomen, gaze locked on the spot.

  “It’s more than my baby growing inside you. Although, I have to tell you, Ev, that makes me feel good as fuck.” His eyes find mine. “Like I’ve marked you, and now you’re all mine, but aside from that . . . It’s you that’s special. From the moment I first saw you, it was just you.”

  “Just me?” I ask softly and in disbelief.

  “Stay. Don’t leave. I want you to stay the night with me. Next to me. All night. I want to know you’ll be here when I wake up in the morning, Ev. Don’t run,” he says and then stares at me. Waiting. The uncertain look on his face does me in, and it’s then that I decide to let him in.

  “Okay,” I say as I take his hand, and we walk back into the bedroom.

  We climb back into bed, and I lay my head onto his chest. Whatever thoughts I had of leaving and going home are now gone, a feeling of contentment overcoming me.

  “I’ll stay,” I whisper to him.

  His arm comes around me, and he squeezes me. My mind keeps repeating everything he just said, and all I can think about is just me and the fact that I’m going to have breakfast with Niko tomorrow.

  “I like my bacon crispy.”

  “Your what?” he asks.

  I look up at him. “Breakfast, tomorrow. I want crispy bacon.”

  He lets out a low chuckle, and I can’t help it—I smile too. I’m having breakfast with my cocksure “baby daddy.” The boy I crushed on since I was a kid is now very much a man, and I’m sleeping in his bed telling him how I like my bacon. Who would have thought?

  “Okay.”

  SHE SNUGGLES INTO MY side, her head on my chest, and takes a deep breath before her whole body relaxes.

  “I like this Everly. She’s honest with what she wants, with how she feels,” I say, a content hum vibrating in my chest.

  Everly’s fingers move across my skin in lazy circles, and I’m almost drunk on how good it feels. “I don’t know how to stop,” she says.

  “Stop what?” For a second I think she’s talking about her touch.

  She tilts her head back, eyes catching mine. “Being a bitch to you. Not trusting you.”

  “I guess the question is why? What about me brings that out?” I ask as I run my hand up and down her back.

  “You were my childhood crush, and my heart is a broken, untrusting mess right now. I’m scared you just want me for sex, like all the women you’ve been with, and the first instant I let you in, you’ll devastate what’s left of me.”

  Fuck. She’s hurt and lashing out, and I end up being the target because there’s something between us that I know is more than sex.

  “You’re not a mess, Ev.”

  “Yes, I am,” she argues. “I’m a broken mess. And it’s even worse now.”

  “You may be broken, baby, but you’re not shattered. There is a big difference.”

  “Maybe, but it’s so much more, Niko.”

  “Because of the baby?” I ask. We never did get to discuss whatever it was she came to talk about.

  She nods and gives a little sniffle. “I’m scared.”

  “There’s nothing to be scared of. I’m here with you, and we’ll do it together.”

  I can feel the wetness of a tear slide down my chest, and I take hold of her hand, pulling it up to my lips. A soft kiss while I pull her closer. She’s shaking, crying. Vulnerable in front of me for the first time.

  “I don’t know about babies or what to do. I never babysat. I don’t know the first thing about being a mother or about how to let you in.”

  “I don’t have any answers there. The only thing we can do is be there for each other, help each other, and in that, maybe you’ll see there’s more to me than you think.”

  “Like what?” she asks. I know she doesn’t mean it to hurt, but it still stings how little she seems to know me.

  “Like a man who is loyal. Who values family, friendship, and love.”

  “Friendship . . .” she trails off. “And there is the number three thing that is making me a disaster.”

  “Cam.”

  She nods. “I started this by lying to you on a night you were helping out a friend. You were there, waiting for me, doing everything Cam asked of you and I deceived you, but in the end, that won’t matter to him. He’s going to hate you, and it’ll be my fault.”

  My lips form a thin line. She’s a little too honest. I almost wish she would lie to me about Cam’s reaction, but I know it’s the truth. No matter who started it, the bottom line is I had sex with his sister. Even worse, I got her pregnant after I found out who she was.

  I went after her because I wanted her. So much so that I forgot about my promise to my best friend. All I wanted was more time with her.

  “It’s going to suck when he finds out, I’m not gonna lie. I’m going to get the shit beat out of me.”

  Everly gasps, her brow furrowed as she looks up at me. “I never meant to hurt either of you. I never wanted that.”

  I shrug. “I never meant to knock you up. Shit happens.”

  “That’s it? Shit happens?”

  “Trust me; I’m not looking forward to a fight with Cam. He’s an attack dog when it comes to you, and I am definitely not safe.”

  “Then let’s wait on telling him,” she says.

  I scrunch my brow as I look down at her. “And keep up the lie that it’s your shithead ex’s kid?”

  She nods. “I don’t think I can deal with it right now.”

  “No, Everly. It’s gonna have to be dealt with.”

  “I know, but give it a few weeks . . . or months.”

  I heave a sigh and shake my head. “If we wait too long, it’s only going to be worse. It’s better just to rip this Band-Aid off as soon as possible.”

  “Please? I promise that we will tell him, just not now. We can tell him together.”

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea, but I’ll wait a little longer, Ev,” I concede.

  “Thank—”

  “But not much longer,” I say, cutting her off. “He needs to know, and it’s best if he hears it directly from me.”

  “I don’t know about that, but thank you.” She leans over and places a kiss on my chin.

  “Everything is going to work itself out, Ev,” I say as I pull her tighter just to feel her as close to me as possible. “Try not to stress, and take care of you and our baby. Let me worry about your brother. Okay?”

  “Yeah, okay.”

  “You’re what?” I ask into the phone. Everly called at one of the worst fucking times with Cam only a few feet away.

  “I’m going to tell my parents this weekend. Cam’s going with me,” she repeats.

  “That’s great—I can’t wait to hear all about it,” I say, sounding a little too cheerful.

  There’s a whispered, “Fuck,” then a loud sigh. “Is he close?”

  I step out the back door where a couple of guys are sitting at the picnic table and keep walking until I’m hopefully out of earshot.

  “We have the same shift tonight.”

  “I’m sorry, I should have sent a text first.”

  “No, it’s fine, really,” I assure her. The last thing I need is to give her any type of barrier. “I want you to call. Just know if he’s nearby, I’ll speak in some code until I can get away.”

  “Are we spies now?” she whispers into the phone. “If so, can I be some sexy, confident femme fatale?”

&nbs
p; “Trust me, baby, you’re already that.”

  There’s a moment of silence, and I pull my phone back to make sure we’re connected. I begin to wonder if I pissed her off somehow when she comes back. “Hold on,” she says, her voice a bit strangled.

  Total silence takes over, but it shows we’re still connected, so I wait. It takes a few minutes, but then she’s back.

  “Sorry, I didn’t want you to listen to that.” Her voice is rough.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Nothing but my regularly scheduled vomit session.”

  Ah. “Gross.”

  “And that is why I didn’t want you to listen.”

  “Are you able to keep anything down?” I ask. If she’s not getting any nutrients, that can’t be good for her or the baby.

  “A little, but not much.”

  “That’s not good. You should talk to the doctor to see if there’s something to help. There has to be.” I don’t know much about pregnancy, but I know about humans, and we need food to survive.

  “I have my first appointment on Tuesday, which is another reason I’m calling.”

  “I’ll be there,” I say, not even letting her ask me.

  “I haven’t even told you what time.”

  “Doesn’t matter. Besides, I have the night shift on Tuesday. And anyway, if I were scheduled, I’d switch with one of the guys.”

  “Niko . . .”

  “Stop, Ev. I will be at every single appointment, no matter what.”

  “Even the checkups?”

  “Yes, this is important to me, too. I don’t care what I have to do to make sure I’m there, but I will. I told you we’d do this together, and I meant it. All of it.”

  “You know, you’re making it hard not to like you.”

  A chuckle leaves me. “Good. It’s about time you noticed what everyone else knows is fact.”

  “And what’s that?”

  The guys at the picnic table are all looking at me, Jenkins is making kissy faces in my direction. I flip them the finger and smirk.

  “That Niko Callahan is a god,” I say loud enough for the assholes to hear.

  There’s laughter, and I can hear a banging. “A god?”