Salvation

by Ahren Sanders

  “So all of this is good.” Alex pats me on the head.

  “Yeah, but being with him is so easy for me. He asked me to call him when I got home. I tried to tell him I would text, but he said he wanted to hear my voice.”

  “Smooth, that’s a smooth move.” Cruz whistles.

  I sit back and cross my arms, glaring at him. “That wouldn’t have anything to do with your talk, would it?”

  “Honestly, no, he came up with that on his own.”

  I stare at him for a minute before deciding I believe him and let the whole thing go. The truth that it led me to my first kiss with Robbie doesn’t need to be discussed either.

  “Oh, shit, from that dreamy look on your face, I can tell something happened. I’m afraid to ask what.”

  “Then don’t, because I’m not telling you.”

  “You will. You always do.”

  I shrug and sip my coffee. “As aggravated as I am with you, your advice is needed. Do you think it’s weird to ask him to come here tomorrow night and I cook?”

  “AKKK! I thought you liked this guy? Why the hell would you want to poison him with your cooking?” Cruz’s horrified expression makes me want to throw something at him.

  “You asshole! I can cook!”

  Alex looks between the two of us and bursts into laughter. “Cruz, don’t be a dick. I think it’s a good idea. We can stay at my place.”

  The two of them share a look, and I start to feel uncomfortable. “I didn’t mean you can’t come home. It’s not like he’s staying the night or anything.”

  “Ember, I know you’re slow on the uptake, but a woman asking a guy to dinner at her house can mean a variety of things. Should we be gone all night?”

  “Oh. My. God! No! I just wanted to invite him for dinner. Is that so incomprehensible?”

  “Nope, hold on to your harlot. I was just asking.”

  “Do you think I’d sleep with him after only a few times seeing each other?”

  “I would,” both men say at the same time, holding back laugher.

  “Well, I’m not,” I huff.

  “Calm down. We’re joking with you.”

  “You’re both asses.”

  “Yes, but you still love us.”

  “Yeah, even if I think of killing you slowly after the stunt you pulled yesterday.”

  Cruz bends over and yanks me out of my chair and over his shoulder, spinning us around. “We love you, Star. It’s our job to act like pseudo assholes in order to protect you. But something tells me you know what you’re doing.”

  “Stop! I’ll throw up on you!” I beat on his back until he pulls me up and I’m dizzy. “I love you both, but quit with the antics. Let me see where this goes.”

  Both nod in agreement, and Cruz puts me on my feet. “So spill. I’d love to hear about Robbie meeting Declan Collins.”

  I smile at the story. “Sit down and get your coffee. It’s a long story, but the way he told it, it has to do with migraines, tongues in ears, and Robbie calling him a street thug.”

  Both men sit and listen as I retell the story. By the time I’m done, tears are rolling down my cheeks from laughing so hard and both Cruz and Alex are howling.

  I stir the risotto and check the pork again. Robbie should have been here five minutes ago. My phone dings with a text, so I grab it quickly.

  Cruz: Relax and have fun.

  Why the hell do I feel like an eighteen-year old instead of twenty-three? Oh yeah, because I was forced to grow up and never really experienced my teens. My fucking mom and Natalie left me no choice but to be the responsible adult in the house.

  I check the meat again unnecessarily, and start to get nervous. Maybe this was too much. Maybe Robbie thinks coming to my house for dinner means more than it should. With my freak-out looming, the doorbell rings and another round of nerves kicks in.

  When I open the door, all I see is a vase of cellophane wrapped stems. “What in the world?”

  Robbie lowers the bouquet and smiles slyly. “Sorry I’m late, but these weren’t ready yet.”

  He steps into the doorway, crowding me with his large body. Being barefoot puts me at a sizable height disadvantage. The smell of his cologne hangs in the air around us, and I inhale deeply, eyeing him. He lowers his head and runs his lips across mine lightly. “You look beautiful.”

  “Thanks,” I whisper, momentarily getting lost in his liquid blue eyes. He reaches around and lays everything in his hands on the entry table then lifts me into his arms. For a few seconds, he stares at me then crushes his mouth to mine.

  The kiss is wet, hot, and deep, with neither one of us holding back. Our tongues dance together, and our bodies mold as I wrap my arms around his shoulders, hugging him close. Too soon, he pulls away, nipping my lower lip.

  “Hi there,” he says breathlessly.

  “Hi.”

  “Am I about to get my ass kicked by two very protective guys that see me mauling you in the foyer?”

  “No, it’s just us.”

  A flash of something crosses his face before he grins. “Just us, huh?”

  I open my mouth to respond as the timer goes off on the oven. As much as I hate to do it, I pry myself out of his arms and run to the kitchen. He follows and brings the package with him.

  “What are those?” I baste the meat.

  “I haven’t been able to think about anything but the taste of your chocolate kisses since Tuesday night, so I had the bakery down the street put a bouquet of chocolate flowers together for me.”

  “Chocolate kisses?”

  “The mousse.” He raises one eye and smirks.

  Tuesday night, he insisted we have dessert, so I ordered chocolate mousse. The memory of our kiss goodnight at my car comes back and I grin.

  “It’s selfish, really. I could have gotten flowers, but the thought of the chocolate kisses for an extended period of time won out.”

  We look at each other for a long minute, and I’m positive there’s a goofy grin on my face. “That’s really sweet.”

  “Smells great. Can I help?”

  “No, but you can open the wine.”

  His crooked expression is hilarious. “Would you be offended if I said I’m not a wine guy?”

  “Nope, already figured that. Beer is in the fridge. The wine is for me.”

  He chuckles and gets us both a drink as I finish dinner. We sit down to eat, and the conversation is light for a while as we talk about our jobs. I’m shocked when he tells me the depth of James’s business. His explanation the other night only skimmed the surface of Hayes Security. Apparently, they have a group that contracts with the US Government on highly confidential projects. Robbie’s whole demeanor changes when he talks about this division. It’s obvious he wants to be a part of the team.

  Once we are done, I start to clean, but he places a hand over mine and his face turns serious. The hair on the back of my neck stands.

  “Ember, tell me about your family.”

  “What about them? Cruz and Alex are pretty self-explanatory. My Aunt Chloe is phenomenal. She’s unlike any woman I’ve ever known. She’s kind and gentle, very open about everything. Her support has no bounds. If I told her I wanted to be President, or I wanted to design clothes, she’d be cheering me on loudly.”

  “Sounds like an amazing woman.”

  “You have no idea.”

  “What about your parents? Any siblings?” he asks cautiously.

  I open my mouth to answer and shut it quickly. Does he really want to know my mom hates me? Or is it too taboo to talk about how my only blood sibling would like me dead? These are things I never speak about and, therefore, my guard goes up.

  “Yes, of course I have parents. And one sister,” I add quickly and leave the table in a rush. I start to put away the remaining food and slam the pots in the sink.

  “Whoa, what happened? Did I say something wrong?” He comes up behind me.

  “No, but I never talk about my family. Ever. Not everyone has the love and sup
port system you do. I’ve seen the way you interact with your sister and talk about your parents. Let’s just say, some of us aren’t so lucky.” My body twists into him.

  “So tell me to mind my own fucking business, tell me it’s off limits, but don’t close me out and go into total shut down. I didn’t know. It was only a question.”

  His face is filled with apprehension. If he knows the truth, that look will turn to pity. The last thing I ever want from anyone, especially Robbie, is pity. Then horror sets in because I acted like a manic- one minute smiling and laughing, the next slamming pots in a sink.

  “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. It’s normal for friends to talk about their lives. For me, though, my family is anything but normal.”

  His face twists in a scowl, and I wait for him to say he’s leaving, but instead, he leans in and rests his hands on the counter, trapping me. “I’d like to dissect that whole sentence, but I’m going to start with the fact that you called us friends. Is that what you want us to be?”

  His voice is low and scary, and I don’t dare look him in the eyes. Instead, I focus on the three buttons of his black thermal and tamper down the impulse to run- or cry.

  “Is that what you want?”

  “Don’t answer my question with a question.”

  “I don’t really know what to say. The obvious answer is yes, I want us to be friends. But— “

  “No fucking buts. You’ve met my friends. Have I given you the impression I want to throw back beers and scan the crowd for women with you in a bar? Or hit the gym when I’m bored?”

  “No, you haven’t.” I cringe at the thought of going to the bar with him to pick up other women.

  He lifts my chin gently, forcing me to look at him. “Do you kiss your friends like you do me?”

  I can’t form words, so I shake my head. My skin prickles where his thumb rubs back and forth.

  His eyes soften a little, and he bends down to my level. “Have any of your ‘friends’ brought you chocolate and told you they’ve been dreaming of the taste of it on your lips again?”

  I shake my head again.

  “Good, because it would really suck if the first woman I’ve had an interest in had a slew of male friends that knew exactly what I’m going after.”

  “Going after?” I whisper, heat shooting through my veins.

  His lips touch mine delicately, but he doesn’t move in to kiss me. He speaks softly against them. “Yeah, going after. I tried to stay away and was a fucking dick about it. You’re too pure for a man with demons like me. I have my own shit buried deep, just like you. But maybe one day we can share those with each other. I don’t want to be your friend, Ember. I want to be more.”

  His breath flows into my slightly parted mouth with an intimacy I’ve never experienced, the affection clear in his tone. For once, I don’t shy away and second-guess his intentions. His tone says it all.

  Did I hear him right? Is this really happening? I can’t stop myself from asking, “You do?”

  “Yeah, the question is, do you?”

  “Yes,” I answer breathlessly, wrapping my arms around him. I’m scared to blink, thinking he may disappear and this is a cruel dream.

  “Good answer, because I wasn’t really giving you a choice.” He runs his hands down my torso, pulling me against his hard chest.

  “Why did you try to stay away?” I ask quietly, eager to know.

  “I’m a dumbass. My reasons are stupid. The minute I walked through the door of Clyde’s and my eyes landed on you, I was fucked. You were so beautiful— too beautiful for someone like me. I told myself over and over you’re too sweet and wholesome.”

  My heart stammers in my chest when he calls me beautiful. His stare is so intense; I swear he can see into my soul. “Sweet and wholesome are bad things?” I question.

  “No, they’re scary things. It’s a combination I’ve never thought was for me, but I was wrong. From where I stand now, it’s perfect.”

  “Robbie, I want you to know, I’m not trying to hide things or be difficult. This is all new to me. There’s a chance I’ll screw things up.”

  My own self-doubt takes over, waiting for him to realize he’s making a mistake. There’s nothing I want more than to have a relationship with him, but how? What happens when he finds out about my past? Fear starts to erupt until he speaks.

  His body grows tight. “With just a few kisses, you have me wanting more. I like you for who you are. Don’t try to change anything for me. I’ll be patient, but one thing I can’t handle is that look on your face earlier. I get there’s stuff you don’t want to talk about, but tell me. Don’t shut down, Ember.”

  “I’ve never been in a relationship. As mortifying as it is, I’m not sure how to do this.”

  A huge grin breaks out across his face, and he kisses me gently. “I haven’t either. Maybe we can figure it out together.”

  I smile back at him and watch his expression soften. “So does this invitation to dinner have an expiration, or can we watch a movie afterwards?”

  “I’d really like that, especially since I’ve been dying to see the latest Nicholas Sparks film.”

  His faced scrunches and I push against him, laughing. “Just kidding! How about we pick something a bit more manly?”

  He grins and his eyes shine. “Manly sounds good.”

  We break apart, and he helps me finish cleaning the kitchen before getting me another glass of wine and him a beer. When he walks out, I grab my phone and send a quick text to Cruz.

  Me: Didn’t kill him with my cooking and now a movie… maybe you should stay with Alex ? J/K come home anytime.

  Five seconds later, a text comes back.

  Cruz: Don’t you dare watch Nicholas without me! See you tomorrow.

  Grabbing one of the chocolate flowers from the arrangement Robbie brought in earlier, I walk onto the living room to watch a movie.

  Chapter 7

  Scum of the Earth

  Robbie

  It’s comical when she joins me on the sofa and sits a few feet away. I immediately hug her and pull her close, lying us partly down as we scan through the new release choices. She finally relaxes and I feel her heart racing in her chest.

  The only problem is the sweater she’s wearing is scruffy against my jaw. “Ember, babe, you think you can change tops?”

  “Why? What wrong with this?” She leans up and looks down at herself.

  Without saying anything, I bring the thick collar to her cheek and rub it against her porcelain skin. She frowns instantly. “Ugh, this is not very soft, huh?”

  I shake my head, and she surprises me by sitting up completely and tearing it over her head, throwing it to the end of the couch. Underneath, she’s wearing a deep red camisole that hugs every inch of her. It’s form fitting from her tits to her waist. She lies back down, and I know she feels the hardness under my jeans poking into her hip. Her chuckle sends me back to ninth grade and trying to go past first base with…. What was the girl’s name? All I can think about is Ember Walker.

  When we finally settle on a movie, our bodies are molded together. We’ve spread out completely. She’s partly on top of me and my hand is running gently down her back. I begin to believe she’s fallen asleep, then a drop of moisture leaks through my shirt. Without her asking, I hit pause and wait.

  “I don’t talk about myself very much because my past life caused a lot of pain. Only my close family knows the whole story.”

  “We don’t have to—”

  “No, I want to share. You make me feel safe, Robbie. I’m not sure why, but every time you pull me close or hold me, a sense of peace settles over me.”

  Hearing her words sends a thrill down my spine. I want her to feel protected in my arms. In this short period of time, the thought of her hurting or scared makes me crazy.

  “You can talk to me, Ember.”

  “My dad’s in prison. When I was sixteen, my sister, Natalie, confronted me at school and we had a fight. She ended up pun
ching me in the face, putting a deep cut in my temple. I tried for an hour to stop the bleeding, but a teacher finally took me to the office. I lied and said I tripped and fell, but they didn’t believe me and threatened to call my mom. I panicked. My mom hates me, so we called my dad instead.”

  Her sister punched her? Her mother hates her? Anger builds in my head.

  “When he showed up, he was furious. One look and he knew I was lying. We went to the emergency room to get stitches and then back home. The whole way to our house, he promised me that we were leaving. He knew my mom and sister had finally crossed a line. He promised me they’d never hurt me again.

  “There were cars in the driveway, and he was furious. Once we walked in, things got ugly. My mom was on the sofa with another man, having sex, completely naked, and drunk out of her mind. Liquor bottles were lined up on the coffee table and so were lines of cocaine. Dad yanked the guy off and threw him on the floor, screaming the whole time. The guy didn’t even put up a fight, but was out cold after Dad’s second punch. We all heard a crash from upstairs, followed by laughing. Dad flew up the stairs with me on his tail.

  “Natalie was naked, having sex on my bed. When I saw, my scream turned every eye in the room. Dad went into a fit of rage, tearing the guy off her and beating him until he fell onto the ground. He was one week away from turning eighteen, and my dad really messed him up. For a while, he was unconscious in the hospital- traumatic head injury. Charges were pressed. With two men bloody and unconscious, one of them being underage, Dad was charged with several things. One was assault on a minor. My mom didn’t help things, either. It took a while for the whole process, but he took a deal and went to prison.”

  My mind spins with a way to tamper down my anger. A sense of possessiveness I’ve never felt bleeds to the surface. I tighten my arms around her before speaking. “Ember, what happened to you?”

  “Besides living in a house with two women that hated me and tortured me every day in their own sick ways? Nothing. My mom and sister continued to drink, do drugs, and have sex with random guys. Every once in a while, my mom would threaten to throw me out so I’d have to go to foster care. I spent as much time away from my house as possible. A few days after I turned eighteen, I moved here. I lived in an area of abyss until Aunt Chloe and Cruz saved me.”