Second Chance at Forever
Page 19
“Whatever it is dad, I trust you and will give you the chance to explain. You have always been straight up with me, so let’s hear it.”
“Jackson, I swear you’re wiser beyond your years, you certainly don’t take after me. When I was your age, I was reckless and a bit of an ass. You’re only eighteen years old and have the intelligence and wisdom of someone in their thirties.”
“Dad, you’re stalling. Please talk to me.”
“Please keep an open mind for what I’m about to tell you. My senior year of college while attending NYU, I had met the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on. Her beauty pulled me in like a magnet. I was drawn to her from the very start, and I knew I had to meet her and ultimately be with her. I dated lots of women back then, and most of them were just conquests and insignificant lovers. I never felt a connection with any of them until I met my beauty sitting in the library one day. She mocked me, and I loved it. No lines worked on her. She was amazing, and after she finally agreed to go out with me, I knew I wanted no one else. Our relationship was solid, and many times when I looked to my future, she was in it.”
“I wanted to marry this woman and experience it all with her. The time we spent together was beyond any of my wildest expectations, but also the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. I asked her to marry me many times when we were in bed together. She always thought I was kidding around, but I think deep down she knew I wasn’t and that the day was coming for the real proposal. After graduation, I was to go to California and begin working for your grandfather’s company. I planned on having her join me once I got settled. She was going to continue with graduate school and work part-time. My last night spent with her was indescribable. We just loved each other with all that we had, and my biggest regret was leaving her in the morning.”
“I wanted to surprise her with her favorite breakfast and my proposal. I was called away to handle some unforeseen business at the office, which I now know was orchestrated as a diversion. I didn’t know this at the time. My girl looked breathtaking as she slept in her peaceful sleep. All I wanted to do was finish up and return to her. Proposing to her was all I had thought about, but I never got the chance to do so. I returned to my apartment and found it empty. She was gone, and all she left for me was a note telling me goodbye.”
“Wow!” Jackson exclaimed, “How could mom have done that to you? Maybe she got cold feet as they say, and needed time to think. Obviously you two worked it out, because you did marry and then had me.”
To hear Jackson talk about his mom and think she was “the girl” in my story was killing me. This was the part I dreaded the most because he always had this idealistic memory of his mother and the life we had together. I was about to crush his whole image of her. I poured myself a drink and composed myself for what I was to say next to him.
“Jackson, I’m not speaking about Elizabeth. Your mother was my childhood friend, my very best friend. I was a few months from graduating college when everything went to shit in my life. It was your mother who saved me from myself and helped me mend my broken heart. I can never repay her for the kindness she showed me back then. Her generosity was overwhelming. She gave me her heart when I didn’t deserve it. I belonged to another, and no matter how much time I spent with Elizabeth, I never loved her the way I should have.” I carefully watched Jackson’s face, as he struggled to understand where this story was leading to.
“Your mother loved me back with all of my faults, and she always believed that she had enough love in her heart for the both of us. This is how incredibly unselfish your mother was, and in time my feelings did change for her. When we found out she was pregnant with you, I married your mom, and I completely centered my entire world on her and taking care of you. Your mother was so happy to be pregnant with you, and she couldn’t wait to hold you in her arms. I begged her to find out what we were having, but she never wanted to know. When you were born, I placed you into her arms, and I whispered into her ears, ‘We have a son.’ I made promises to your mother that I would be the best father I could be to you. I vowed to always put you first no matter what. Jackson, I pray that I have all these years and haven’t broken my promise to Elizabeth.”
My son was quiet, and tears are falling down his cheek. I wanted to just take him in my arms and hold him, but I waited for him to tell me or show me what he was feeling. Please god, don’t hate me, Jackson.
“Jackson, are you alright son?”
“Dad, if it wasn’t mom, then who are you talking about? Whatever happened to this woman? Did you ever try to find her and ask her why she left you in the first place? I’m sorry that this happened to you, dad, but if it didn’t, I may not be here right now. I guess everything happens for some cosmic reason, at least I try to believe that.”
“It does, son, I never believed in theories about what’s meant to be, but I do now. Fate has stepped in and has given me a second chance to right a wrong that never should have been. In life we sometimes are not meant to understand everything as it happens. Eventually we may, and we either choose to accept the choices we make and have made, or someone else does it for us. In my story, and unbeknownst to me at the time, outside forces conspired together that separated me from the girl who I was in love with. I only recently found out who the responsible party was.”
“Who is this woman, dad? Was she the big love of your life? The one that got away? Because it sure wasn’t my mother!” It’s like Jackson is looking right through me now. Does he know what I’m about to say? “Dad, what the hell? Who is she?”
“Her name is…Reese.”
Jackson was silent.
And then he wasn’t so silent. “No fucking way, dad. You mean to tell me it’s Riley’s mom? Oh my god, I think I’m going to be sick. The way you two acted that night in the restaurant, I knew something felt off about it. Dad, I have never seen you behave that way before; right there I should have called you out on it. I can’t believe this is happening, and now it all makes sense to me.” He doesn’t know the half of it.
“Jackson, you need to calm down and let me explain. There is so much more to this story than you can even begin to understand.”
“Dad, it seems pretty clear to me. Riley’s mom was the bitch that broke your heart and stomped on it all those years ago. You married the consolation prize, my mother, and then she goes and dies on you and straps you with a kid that you probably didn’t want.”
I grabbed Jackson by the shoulders, and I forced him to look at me. “Jackson, I always wanted you. Don’t you ever defile your mother’s memory like that again! Do you hear me, son? You’re my whole world, my reason for getting up every day and living this life. I will never regret being your father. If you believe anything, you must believe that. I love you, my son.”
“I love you too, dad.” Jackson wrapped his arms around me and held me in a vice grip of a hug until he cried it all out. My son rarely showed this level of emotion with me. After hearing about his mother, he must have needed to get it out.
“Jackson, please calm down. I want you to sit and take a breath. I know this is hard to hear son, but you have to know losing your mother was the hardest thing I have ever had to go through in my life. You, my son, were my lifeline. To be responsible for another human being is the hardest job in the world, and it became my responsibility to care for you and be two parents to you. I never imagined doing this alone, but what happened to your mother was an unforeseen tragedy. You’re the one good thing that happened to me after losing her. You have your mother’s kind eyes, and I know she is with you. I was lucky to have known her and share my life with her for the short amount of time we were given. Not a day that goes by that I don’t remember your mom fondly. How can I not? I see her every day in you. She would be so proud of the man you have become.”
“I’m sorry, dad, for your loss and for flipping out. I always thought mom was the one you were meant to be with, and to have that not be true, kind of freaked me out.”
“Jackson, you
don’t have to apologize, your reaction was justified. I never thought I would have to share this with you at all. My life with your mom, and what I shared with Reese, was very personal. I have never talked to anyone about this, but your mom. I wanted to preserve your mother’s memory and show you who she was.”
“I love you, dad. I couldn’t have asked for a better father than you. Can you please continue with your story?”
“As I said, it’s very complicated. Please don’t think of Reese, Riley’s mom, in a bad way. She was a victim in all of this. Reese loved me, Jackson, and her feelings were true. Sadly, she fell prey to someone who manipulated her and convinced her that she wasn’t worthy of me and who ultimately pushed her out of my life. I didn’t know why she left me, and to have only a note telling me goodbye nearly destroyed me. I searched all over the city for Reese, but every turn I came up empty, and then my anger took over and I gave up.”
“Forces around me convinced me that she wasn’t worth it, and to move on with my life. As I said, I was self-destructing and not caring about anything until your mom gave me hope. I never expected to turn around and see Reese standing before me that night in the restaurant. My heart was bursting out of my chest, and all I wanted to do was hold her in my arms, but we were both so shocked that we played it off. Sitting so close in her proximity after all of these years, my shock turned to anger and I wanted to just mess with her a bit, so that explains my behavior. I knew you knew me better than that, son. I was waiting for you to confront me, but you never did. I’m thankful for that, because I needed time to compose myself and process it all.”
“Dad, does Riley know any of this?”
“No, she doesn’t, son. Reese and I both talked about how we were going to tell you both, but we never got the chance to.”
“Who was the person that made Reese leave you and kept you two apart?”
“I think you’ve heard enough for now, Jackson.”
“Dad, you said you would tell me everything. You can’t stop now.”
“Jackson, I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have. Please let’s drop this.”
“Dad, the only way you will hurt me is by keeping me in the dark. Tell me everything.”
I took a deep breath and started. “After you and Riley left the restaurant, I confronted Reese. I forced her to tell me everything as to why she left me all those years ago. We spent hours together talking, fighting, and revealing many things to one another. Reese told me that your grandfather—my father— tried to blackmail her with something from her past. It’s not important, and it never was, but at the time it scared Reese. Your grandfather used what he knew to convince her that she wasn’t worthy of being with me, and I was only using her to sow my oats until I married the right girl. In a moment of weakness, Reese believed him and left. She left school, her friends, and me all behind, because of a made-up story that she believed to be true.”
Jackson looked shocked as I continued, “What I didn’t find out until she told me was that she was pregnant with my child when she left. She had planned on telling me about the baby the same morning I was to propose to her. We both never got the chance.”
I took a deep breath and pressed on, “Reese told me that she did try to come back to work things out with me, but fate again stepped in and changed the course of our life. She got sick before reaching out to me and lost our baby. I married your mother, and we left for California.”
I went on, “Reese met Riley’s father, and began a relationship with him. They married, and the rest is history. I don’t know if I was ever meant to find any of this out, but when your grandfather died, he had left instructions with his lawyer to finally reveal the truth to me. This is why I made the trip out to the Hamptons. Reese told me all that she could, but it was my father who held the key to my past and played a role in breaking me and Reese up.”
“Why would grandfather do this to you? It doesn’t make any sense to me. How can someone do that to another person? I hate him, dad, for what he did to you.”
“Jackson, please don’t. This is why I never wanted to tell you. You have many good memories of your grandfather, and he loved you very much. I believe he loved me too, but he had a hard time showing it. He had his reasons why he did what he did, but they were his and his alone. I can’t continue to try to understand them. When you were born, he changed, and you were his second chance. I allowed him to be a part of your life, and I’m happy you had time with him that I never did. He wanted you to have this watch, which belonged to my grandfather, and now it’s yours.”
He held the watch as I said, “Please carry it with you as a reminder that time is precious, and life is short. Life is unpredictable and sometimes cruel. We lose the ones that we love, and if we are lucky…we can have a second chance at forever to make it right.”
“Is the universe laughing at me now, dad? How did I meet the girl of my dreams who happens to be the daughter of the girl of your dreams?”
“I don’t know, son, I’m still trying to wrap my head around that one, but I do know Riley cares for you. When I see you two together, I see me and Reese all those years ago. It’s like I’m watching a movie of my life and waiting to see what happens next.”
“What does happen next, dad? She’s married to someone else, and how will this affect my relationship with Riley? I love her dad, but she’s not going to want to be with me if you break up her parents’ marriage.”
“Jackson, Reese and I belong together, we always have. I love her, son, and my feelings have never changed for her. She is just existing in a loveless marriage that has never really made her happy. Before coming to New York, Reese asked her husband for a divorce, and then to reunite with me is just fate’s way of righting the wrongs that happened to us. Our chance was taken away from us by forces beyond our control. Now is the time to take back what we lost and be together like we always planned to do.”
“I get that dad, but at what cost? You love Reese, she loves you, but what about the other people in this story? Riley, her father, and me. It doesn’t matter if she asked her husband for a divorce, they still have a life together and have a daughter. Riley is never going to understand this and be accepting to the fact that my father is the reason why her parents are not together anymore. Dad, you really have not given any thought of the damage that you and Reese will leave in the promise of being together. I think at this point, we should just go home and I’ll work things out with Riley on my own. But, dad, you need to walk away from her mother.”
“I can’t do that, Jackson, I won’t. I have lost too many years without her in my life, and I can’t lose one more day. You always wanted me to be happy and find someone to share my life with; well she’s the one I want, Jackson. I can’t deny my feelings for her because she is married to someone else. I know our situation is very unique and complex, but you already believe Riley is the one for you, don’t you? As I have always known Reese was for me.”
“We just need to trust our heart and follow the path that it leads us on. Jackson, I love you, you know this. I would do anything for you son, but this is one request that I have to say no to. I can’t let her go and have her slip away from me again. Please understand and give me your support.”
“Dad, I want to, believe me I do, but all I see is this ending badly for all of us. I want you to be happy, dad, I really do. You have given me everything and put me before your own happiness. I can’t stand here and tell you that you don’t deserve some of your own. I will try to do things your way. I want Riley to be my forever. I know that we’re young, dad, but when I look to my future, I only see her in it. Can you understand that?”
“More than you know, son…more than you know.”
“I’m taking a big risk here, dad, but I trust you. I just hope we can separate our two relationships and not destroy what we have.”
“Jackson, oh god, thank you.” I hugged my son and let out the breath I was holding. We made it through this storm, and now he knows the truth.
> “Dad, what happens next? How are we going to explain why we’re there? Riley hasn’t returned one of my phone calls, and you haven’t spoken to Reese. I haven’t even met her father yet. How the hell is he going to react to me when I introduce myself to him?”
“Jackson, I must ask you not to reveal anything that I have told you with Riley. I don’t know if Reese has told Riley about us. The way they left is leading me to believe that her husband may suspect something, and I have to tread very carefully on how to proceed. I have a contact watching their villa, and once we arrive, I will be brought up to speed.”
“I have never seen this side to you before, it’s like you have shifted into mega mogul, and you will stop at nothing to get what you want.”
“Jackson, I have lived my life at the highest level of control, and I wouldn’t be able to run my business without it. When it comes to matters of my heart, it requires a similar level of control and discipline. I know what I want, and who I want, so it’s time to get my woman back.”
WAKING UP IN paradise was not like I expected. As I laid there with Samuel’s heavy arm across my chest, I felt as if I was having an out-of-body experience. Samuel was relentless yesterday with his demands of me and Riley. He had forced us on this trip and was controlling every aspect of it. I hadn’t had a minute to myself since Samuel showed up in New York yesterday morning.
I carefully removed my body from under Samuel, hoping I didn’t wake him. The bathroom would be my safe place to think for a few minutes, I hoped. I took a peek at my phone and of course it was full with text messages from a number that no one would know but me. I quickly read them as they were all in code, just in case my phone ended up in the wrong hands. I did have one voicemail, and it was from Walker. I peeked out from the bathroom and eyed a sleeping Samuel. Thank god, now I can listen to Walker’s voicemail.
“Reese, I don’t know why you left without saying goodbye. I can’t believe I’m actually saying these words again, it’s like I’m back there when I discovered you missing the first time. I will find you this time. I promise you that, my love. Reese, I meant every word I said to you last night. I love you, and you’re mine forever. You will be seeing me soon. You can count on that.”