Summer at the Dog & Duck

by Jill Steeples

  ‘God no. I’ve not been explaining myself properly, Ellie. That’s the last thing I want. All I’m saying is that we need to make some changes in our relationship. Don’t you think? This, us, is really important to me.’ He stroked the hair away from my face, looking into my eyes imploringly. ‘I’m just worried that if we don’t give each other, our relationship, the time it deserves, then it will suffer as a result. It’s happened before in my previous relationships. I was so wrapped up in my work that inevitably things fizzled out. I don’t want that to happen to us, Ellie. I want us to spend much more time together. That’s what I came to say. What do you think?’

  ‘Yes, yes.’ I was nodding my head in agreement, but feeling slightly dazed too. It was everything I wanted to hear. ‘Well, we’ll just have to make sure we make time for each other. Have date nights and see each other at the weekends, even if it’s only for breakfast and a dog walk.’

  ‘Yes, but we’re supposed to be doing that now and it’s not working, is it? The days slip by when we’re both so busy and soon it’s a whole week since I’ve seen you.’ He hugged me to him tighter and the firmness of his body up against mine sent swirls of delight rippling through my body. ‘Ellie, I need more than that. I want to go to sleep with you every night and wake up beside you in the morning. I don’t want to have to keep calling you to find out where you are and what you’re doing. Second-guessing what you’re thinking. It’s too stressful. Why don’t you move in with me?’

  ‘What? At the manor?’

  ‘Yes,’ he laughed, seeing my bewilderment. ‘Why not? There’s plenty of room.’

  It was true, there was plenty of room at the manor. And I’d be lying if I said I had never entertained a fantasy about living in that big country house, swanning around amidst all that luxury, with Max making me breakfast every day. It would be the most magical place to live. A proper family home. But… Why did there always have to be a but?

  ‘It’s a lovely idea, Max, but I couldn’t leave The Dog and Duck. I’ve committed myself to running this place and I want to do the best possible job I can. I need to be here, on-site, to keep an eye on things. This is my home and my business,' I said, wishing there could be a way around this.

  ‘But think about it, Ellie. You could still run the pub living at the manor. It’s only up the road. How long does it take to walk up there, about five minutes? And you could get someone else in the living quarters if you really felt you needed a presence here. What do you think?’

  My heart was soaring, believing it to be the most amazing idea ever and part of me wanted to throw my arms around Max’s neck and scream my agreement. Moving in with Max would be no hardship at all, living with the man I loved, wasn’t that what it was all about? But what sort of message would it give out to my customers? They might take it as proof that I wasn’t totally committed to my role as landlady of the pub.

  ‘I think… well I’m very flattered that you’ve asked me. I really wasn’t expecting that. It’s just a bit of a shock, that’s all.’

  Max chuckled and kissed me firmly on the lips. It was hard to think straight when I was locked in his arms, his breath warm against my cheek. ‘Just tell me you’ll think about it. I know we could make it work.’ He pulled back holding me at arm’s length, the intense appraisal of his dark eyes not leaving my face for a moment. ‘I want to be with you, Ellie. Properly. If we really want to make a go of our relationship and build a future together, I think we have to do this. If that’s what you want too, then I can see no reason to wait, can you?’

  The trouble was Max could be totally convincing when he was enthused about an idea and it would be so easy to be swept away by his conviction, but already in my head I was mentally preparing a list of reasons why it couldn't happen:

  • I had the pub to consider – it was my home and my livelihood and I wouldn’t want to do anything to jeopardise that.

  • Max and I had only been properly going out together for six months – perhaps it was too soon for such a big commitment.

  • Digby would hate it! Scrap that, Digby would love it. With two canine friends to lark around with and extensive grounds to run around in, he would be absolutely in his element.

  I sighed inwardly. Max was right, whatever obstacles were in our way, we would be able to overcome them and find a way to make it work. But there was one huge scary thought that I couldn’t get out of my mind; what if, despite all our best efforts, it didn’t work? If I committed myself to Max, moved into his house, declared my undying love to him and then it all went horribly wrong. What if we found out that we didn’t like each other as much as we thought, or I discovered he had some awful personal traits that I couldn’t tolerate. Like snoring. Or cutting his toenails in the bath. Or, more likely, what if he hated the way I left little piles of mess around behind me. I wasn’t the tidiest of people, but living on my own meant I could do exactly as I liked when I liked. From what I knew of Max, I suspected he was the neatest of neat freaks and my sluttish tendencies would end up driving him mad.

  I was just thinking about dirty saucepans when Max started sniffing loudly in a most unbecoming and unnecessary way.

  ‘What on earth is that disgusting smell?’

  I sniffed too, before suddenly remembering. ‘Oh no! My rhubarb!’

  I dashed out to the kitchen, with Max following me closely behind, and snatched the smoking pan off the heat with a tea towel, looking, in dismay, at the black, gloopy concoction stuck to the bottom.

  I swear I heard Max snigger behind me.

  He put his arm round my shoulder and peered at the evidence in front of him. ‘Hmmm, if it's all right with you, I think I’ll give the crumble a miss today.’

  I let out a heartfelt sigh. Well, at least now he knew he wasn't inviting a domestic goddess to live with him.

  Twenty-Two

  ‘Where do these go, Ellie?’

  It was a couple of weeks later and Katy was holding up some clean glasses in her hand, that she’d been polishing conscientiously for the last few minutes with a tea towel.

  ‘All the beer jugs go down here on this shelf beneath the bar.’

  After that emotional session in Max’s kitchen a few weeks ago with Katy, I’d encouraged Max to sit down with her for a proper chat about her future plans. She’d been adamant that she didn’t want to return to Spain and Max had agreed that she could stay in Little Leyton on two conditions. Firstly, that she came up with a proposal as to what she was going to do here - he wouldn’t allow her to mooch around at the manor doing nothing. And secondly, that she got her mum’s agreement to her staying in the UK, which after lengthy discussions, Katy’s mum had agreed to. Apparently, she was very relieved that the whole thing with Katy and her biological father was out in the open and she was keen for a reconciliation with her daughter, even if she was mindful of the fact that it might be some time in coming.

  Last week Katy and I had been into town to visit the local college and to pick up a prospectus. She had decided she wanted to do a business administration and finance course and had all the necessary paperwork now to complete. She was just mulling over a couple of options, but was determined to start her course in the coming academic term. I’d promised her a couple of shifts a week at the pub so she would have some extra spending money while working towards a qualification. In fairness, she’d turned out to be a great little worker, turning up on time and showing enthusiasm for all the tasks given to her, even the less glamorous ones, like mopping up spilt pints of beer. Nothing fazed her and it was good to see her with a new sense of purpose and direction in life. She was a huge hit with the customers too as she always had a smile on her face and would stop to have a chat with anyone who engaged her in conversation.

  ‘What should I do now?’ she asked, hanging up the damp tea towel over the radiator. To be honest, I'd been grateful for the extra pair of hands at the pub because for some reason I’d been feeling even more worn out than usual. I put it down to all the drama of the last few weeks cat
ching up with me, and was hopeful that we'd all reached a new level of calm. I'd seen Sasha around the village on a couple of occasions recently, tootling around in her little blue car, and I'd wondered how she was getting on. She couldn't have long to go now until the arrival of her baby. I would have to make an effort to pop into to see her.

  ‘I think you’re all done here, lovely,’ I told Katy now. ‘You’ve worked really hard, thank you. You can get off home if you like.’

  ‘Oh, okay. Although… I’d much rather stay for a while if you don’t mind.’

  I shook my head, I didn’t mind at all. I enjoyed having Katy around and she would be good company in the afternoon lull between the end of the lunchtime shift and the beginning of the early evening shift.

  ‘Shall I make us a cup of tea?’ she offered, and headed off into the kitchen, coming back later with two full mugs and the biscuit tin. I smiled, as Digby followed her up and down the corridor, ever hopeful that he might be in line for a treat too.

  ‘How’s things then, Katy?’ I asked, when she plonked herself on a stool next to me.

  If she was feeling low in her mood, she wasn’t showing it, and today she seemed more than happy to chat. ‘Oh fine. I’m feeling a lot better now. And it’s so much better now between me and Max. He’s been really brilliant. So supportive.’

  ‘Good, well I’m pleased things have worked out. It’s always better to clear the air and talk about anything that’s troubling you, that way you can avoid any misunderstandings. Although I know,’ I said, with a smile, ‘that it’s easier said than done.’

  ‘Yeah, well at least I’m back on talking terms with Mum. Not that I’ve really forgiven her yet, but I have spoken to her a couple of times and we text every day.’ She shrugged, looking thoughtful. ‘I do miss her, you know.’

  ‘You’re bound to. She’s your mum and she’ll always be there for you. This is just a hiccup along the way. You might not think so now, but I bet you’ll get over this and your relationship will be even stronger as a result.’

  ‘We’ll see,’ said Katy, looking wholly unconvinced. ‘She did say that she could put me in touch with my biological dad, if I wanted to.’

  ‘Oh really. And how do you feel about that?’

  ‘Not sure,’ she said, swinging her legs idly from the heady heights of the stool. ‘It would be weird, don’t you think? He’d be like a stranger and I don’t know if he’d even want to meet up with me. He’s probably got his own family now and I might upset the apple cart just turning up one day and saying “hello daddy”!’

  She laughed nervously, thinking about it.

  ‘Well you won’t know unless you try, and I’m sure there must be discreet ways of going about these things, but I guess that’s something for you to think about. There’s no hurry is there?’

  ‘No, I suppose not.’ She was lost in thought for a moment. ‘There was something I asked Mum about though, one thing I really wanted to know.’

  ‘What was that then?’ I asked curiously.

  ‘Well I had to find out if Dad had known. It was really important to me. I begged her to tell me the truth. Apparently, Dad had known from the very beginning that I wasn’t his, but he insisted on bringing me up as his own. She said how much he adored me, how I was his little princess and how he never once mentioned anything about me not being his child. As far as he was concerned, I was his daughter and he loved me. There was nothing more to it than that.’

  My eyes misted over. ‘Well that’s good, isn’t it?’

  ‘Yes, it means so much to me knowing that,’ she sighed. ‘If he hadn’t known the truth and had gone to his grave thinking I was his real child when I wasn’t, that would have been terrible. I would have been forever wondering how he would have felt if he’d known the truth. If he might have rejected me and wanted nothing more to do with me. The fact that he chose to take on the role as my father, and that he loved me so much, well it makes me feel so much happier.’ She took a sip from her tea. ‘I suppose I got hooked up on the detail, but at the end of the day it doesn’t really matter, does it? Dad was the man who was always there for me. The one who looked after me. He was my real dad and nothing can take that away.’

  ‘Aw, Katy, that’s so true. I’m so pleased you can see it that way.’

  ‘Yeah, and as for my biological father, well at the moment I’m happy to let things lie. Who knows, maybe in six months or ten years I might feel differently, but for now I just want to put this behind me and move on with my life.’

  ‘That’s a good idea. You’re only seventeen, you’ve got your whole life in front of you.’

  ‘Yeah, and I’ll be so glad when I’m eighteen so that I can drink legally!’ She waved her hands in the air excitedly. ‘I CANNOT wait!’

  I chuckled, feeling the frustration of her words. To be honest, I’d be pleased about that too. One less underage drinker to worry about! ‘Well, not long to go now, but don’t wish your life away. It goes quickly enough as it is. And at least you’ve made some friends in the village now. If this good weather keeps up you’ll have a great summer what with all the celebrations to look forward to, and then starting college in the autumn.’

  I smiled, realising how pleased I was that Katy would be staying in Little Leyton. I'd miss her terribly if she left now and I knew that Max would feel the same way too.

  ‘I know,’ said Katy smiling. ‘It’s good to have some firm plans. Ooh, did I show you,’ she asked, whipping out her phone from her back pocket. ‘I’ve got some film here of The Leyton Boys rehearsing. I just love their music, they’re so cool!’

  Katy had been spending a lot of time down at Becks’ Farm with the band, watching them practice, and generally just hanging out, much to Max's dismay. There was a group of lads and girls who did the same and Katy had quickly become one of the gang.

  ‘Gosh, they are good aren’t they?’ I said, poring over her phone, watching the group of guys strut their way over a makeshift stage, tapping my foot to their music. ‘You would think they were professional to look at them.’

  ‘Well they have had some interest from the record companies and they’ve got a couple of meetings lined up soon so I reckon they’re really going to hit the big time.’

  ‘Oh well that would be exciting. We’d be able to say we knew them before they were famous,’ I laughed. ‘Just be careful with Ryan. I know you’re keen on him, but he’s a bit older than you and, well, I don’t want you getting hurt.’

  ‘Oh no, it’s fine. Ryan and I are just good mates.’ Katy flicked her hair back and looked at me wide-eyed. Her casual assertion that she and Ryan were only friends did nothing to assuage my worries. I suspected it was too late for any warnings from me. I could tell by the way Katy’s eyes lit up and the way she grew animated every time she mentioned his name that she was already in way too deep. I knew it because I recognised it. The way she spoke about Ryan, the way she lingered over his name and the way a colour flushed in her cheeks, was the same way I spoke and thought about Max.

  And I'd been doing an awful lot of thinking about Max in the last couple of weeks. In fairness, he hadn’t asked anymore about me moving in with him. I knew he was letting me take my time to come to a decision. There was part of me that wanted nothing more, but it all seemed so scary and such a big step to take. I'd never lived with a boyfriend before and I certainly didn’t want to do anything that might ruin things between us. For now, I was just trying to ignore the elephant in the room.

  We were so busy listening to the next track from The Leyton Boys that I didn’t hear the front door open. It was only when a shadow fell over the bar and I heard a voice, oh so familiar, that I looked up from Katy’s phone.

  ‘Hello stranger, long time no see.’

  Still my head took its time working out who it was standing in front of me.

  ‘Johnny!’ I stood up, still hardly able to believe that Johnny Tay was actually here. ‘You’re back,’ I said, quite unnecessarily.

  ‘Yeah, I’m back, and
it’s great to see you, Ells.’

  He was just as I remembered him, only bigger somehow, in confidence certainly. His wayward curly hair was worn much longer now and his skin bronzed a deep golden tan. The black T-shirt he wore accentuated defined muscles in his arms and chest that had never been there before.

  ‘Well,’ he said, opening his arms out wide. ‘Don’t I get a hug?’

  ‘Oh Johnny!’ I lifted up the bar and ran round the other side to him. He swept me off my feet and swung me around him and I soaked up his lovely familiar scent. ‘It’s so great to see you. When did you get back?’

  ‘Just. You’re my first port of call.’ He stood back and looked all around him. ‘Well, the old pub is looking just as I remember it. How are you enjoying being landlady?’

  ‘Oh, it’s everything I thought it would be. Hard work, long hours, but lots of fun.’

  Johnny had always been one of my staunchest cheerleaders and had encouraged me to take on the pub. Even though he had a vested interest in keeping the pub open – it was his favourite drinking hole and he’d been a regular here ever since he was a teenager – when I’d wavered and questioned my ability to run the pub without Eric being around, Johnny had taken me to one side and told me that I had to do it, that there would be no one better for the job.

  ‘Don’t keep me waiting any longer, Ells. I’ve been away for six months. I’m absolutely gasping for a pint of beer.’

  ‘Oh gosh, of course. Wait there!’ I said, bustling back round to the other side of the bar and pulling out a glass jug. ‘A pint of the usual then?’

  ‘You remembered!’

  ‘How could I forget,’ I said, with a smile.

  He waited as I poured the beer, watching my every move, the action seeming to take much longer than usual with Johnny looking on, keen with expectation. ‘Oh god, that’s so good, even better than I remember,’ he said, smacking his lips, after taking a very long glug, almost emptying the glass in one go. ‘I have to give it to you, Ellie. You do keep a very good pint of beer.’