Guarded Desire

by Christi Snow

  Elle shook her head. “Well, that’s really not my story to tell. But I can say this much...like the two of you, VA forced him upon me. She just doesn’t know that I kept him, and we want to keep it that way. Trace’s presence in my life is none of VA’s business, and I will cut off the balls of the guy who tells her about him.”

  The curiosity about how that all happened was driving me nuts. What could the huge secret be?

  Dillon must have agreed, because his eyes widened at and he turned toward me looking for answers.

  I shrugged. “I don’t know anything about it, either. She’s very protective of their relationship.”

  “You bet your ass I am. You saw what he was willing to sacrifice for me today. That kind of loyalty means everything. I won’t let VA interfere with his life...ever.”

  “Noted,” I said. “And you can trust us to keep your confidence. Your mom won’t hear anything about Trace from us.” I exchanged a look with Dillon, and I knew from his expression that we would be discussing it between the two of us later. I could see curiosity burning through his brain.

  Which reminded me...I had asked him to do a background check on Trace, and I’d never gotten it. He actually probably knew a hell of a lot more than I did about Trace at this point.

  Dillon drove us to the gym where Hawk Works had commissioned time for us, so we could work on Elle’s self-defense skills. We were lucky to have a specialized facility in the city, which featured both shooting ranges and the mats appropriate for grappling exercises. We had to share use of it with the local police department, but I was okay with that. I just figured that gave us more backup if the press tracked Elle down again.

  Dillon and I probably wouldn’t be doing too much physical stuff today since neither one of us wore workout gear. We could still cover the basics especially at the gun range so Elle could shoot my gun if she had to and wield a knife without harming herself.

  From the street, the gym looked like nothing more than a warehouse. It didn’t even have a sign on the outside.

  “Are you sure this is the right place?” I asked Dillon.

  “Yep, this is the address.”

  Elle scanned the somewhat sketchy neighborhood surrounding the building. “So, this is a real, hands-on kind of place where you can practice your self-defense with real-life muggings right outside, huh?”

  I laughed. “Don’t worry, Illumination, we’ll keep you safe.”

  She scowled at me. “Sounds good, Joe.”

  I growled, and Dillon laughed. I fucking hated it when people called me that, and he knew it.

  The front door flew open, and two uniformed cops stepped through it. We all waited while they came through before stepping inside.

  Elle blew out a relieved breath. “Okay, I feel better.”

  This was most definitely a cop gym as several more uniformed cops milled around the entryway, and most of the gym gear featured the word POLICE on it somewhere.

  “I don’t know about you, Joe,” Dillon said, “but I’m starting to feel under-appreciated with this girl. It’s like she doesn’t think we can protect her without a badge.”

  I punched him on the shoulder...hard. “Well, it’s a good thing we’re here then. Let’s get into the ring where I will take great joy in kicking your ass and showing her just how tough I can be.”

  “Hey, guys,” a man called from the reception counter. “Can I help you?”

  We both reached into our wallets, pulling out IDs as well as our Hawk Works IDs. “I think we’re cleared to work out here.”

  “Aw, yeah.” The guy’s nametag read Nate. “I saw some paperwork about that this morning.” He shuffled through the piles of paper on the desk before he found the one he’d been looking for. “Here it is. Yep.” He glanced down at our identification. “It all matches. Let me just copy your IDs, and if you’ll sign your guest in here.” He pushed a clipboard to me and looked to Elle. “I’ll need to see your ID, too.”

  “Oh, sure.” She dug into her purse and pulled her driver’s license out of her wallet. After our paperwork was completed, Nate gave us a quick tour of the gym and the safety protocols for the weapons areas where he left us since that was what we most wanted to work on.

  The three of us crowded into one shooting lane, and I began to quiz Elle. “Have you ever handled a gun before?”

  She snorted at me. “I may be VA’s daughter, but I grew up in Texas. I think that kind of thing is state law, although I’ll admit, I’ve only shot a handgun a couple of times.”

  “Okay, that’s good.” After we’d done a quick review of basic gun safety and handling where Dillon had gotten bored and flitted off to flirt with the hot cops, I gestured for her to pick up the gun. “Let’s see what you have. Go ahead and take a couple of shots.”

  She glanced at me, seemingly unsure, but then she squared her shoulders and picked up the gun. She fired off three shots in succession, and she wrinkled her nose when not a single one hit the target.

  I stepped in behind her to help adjust her stance. “Your feet are too close together. Widen your legs and then as you squeeze the trigger, blow out a breath. You’re tensing, waiting for the kick and it’s sending your shots to the right.” I wrapped my arms around her to show her what I meant.

  Suddenly, I was way too up close and personal with this girl who could turn me on with just a look. Having her body pressed up against mine like this? Yeah, I didn’t have a chance.

  I got lightheaded by how quickly all the blood from my brain rushed south. I closed my eyes at the onslaught, and in a moment of weakness, dipped my head and inhaled the luscious scent of her hair. She smelled like a spicy flower and temptation.

  Her breath hitched, and she leaned into me on a groan that I could feel vibrate against my chest.

  No, no, no. I couldn’t do this. Not again. I could not get close to this girl like this. It wasn’t fair to her, and it wasn’t right for my job. This. Was. A. Job. And I couldn’t forget that fact, no matter how tempting she was.

  I pushed her a little forward so she wasn’t leaning on me, and I stepped back from her. She sent me a confused look over her shoulder, but I just nodded at the gun lane, indicating that she needed to shoot.

  For my sanity...I couldn’t feel her heat, I couldn’t smell her, I couldn’t feel her lush curves against me. I just couldn’t. Not anymore. I wasn’t strong enough to stay away from the temptation.

  Elle shot a few more rounds, hitting the target each time. She set the gun down on the table and turned to me. Her eyes shone with glee. I couldn’t help but return the smile, although it felt subdued as my need slammed into me even harder. Why did I have to be so damn attracted to this girl?

  My client. Thereby...off limits. The job came first. Always had. Always would.

  I told Elle to load another mag. I sent a desperate text to Dillon that I needed him to come take over, because I had to return a phone call.

  He tapped me on the shoulder, and I lifted my cell phone and motioned that I’d meet them outside later.

  With ear protection, we couldn’t really talk, but he raised a challenging eyebrow at me. He wasn’t buying my flimsy excuse for one minute.

  It might have something to do with the erection throbbing in my jeans, refusing to relent, which had to be more than a little noticeable. My lack of control was damn embarrassing. It was like I was fifteen all over again.

  When I got outside, I blew out a breath, wondering if I should recuse myself from this assignment. I’d never had to do that before, but I’d never been this discombobulated by a client before.

  There was no way I could go back inside. My cock still throbbed just from her scent that lingered in my nostrils. I was so fucked here.

  I sent Dillon another text. This may take a while, so go ahead and run her through her self-defense maneuvers and see where she needs some work. Text me when you’re about ready to go.

  Then I made a call to my boss.

  Chapter Nine

  Elle

 
; The last week had been weird between Jonah and I. After that day when we’d visited the shooting range and gym, it was like he’d taken a big step back from me. Now, he was completely professional and withdrawn. Cold.

  I tried not to take it personally, but how could I not? He’d given me the most explosive orgasm that morning. It had been arousing, sensual, and so damn sexy. But by that evening, he couldn’t even stand to be in the same room as me. From that point on, Dillon was the one who stayed nights in my apartment. Jonah accompanied me everywhere during the day as my “boyfriend” and then snuck away in the evenings. I didn’t understand it.

  All I knew was that nothing had happened for a week except my torture. We went throughout our days with him by my side, touching me, whispering to me, and treating me like someone special, when all the while it was nothing more than an act. A tease of what could be, but never would.

  Trace’s audition had gone so well in New York that the director had immediately asked him to stay. Of course, I’d been thrilled for my best friend, but I missed him more now than ever. Trace had always been able to read guys and their motivations so much better than me.

  I dropped into my seat beside my classmate, Minerva, and focused on her and not the hot, sexy guy looming behind me. “Hey, Min. How are you...”

  She turned to me and her eyes lit up with a mix of glee and excitement that made me decidedly uncomfortable as she grabbed hold of my hand. “Oh, Elle. I can’t believe you’re here this morning. How are you holding up?”

  “What?” I glanced around the room and realized that everyone was watching me and whispering.

  Jonah noticed, too, and pulled out his laptop and began to furiously type.

  But Minerva already knew whatever was happening, so I turned to her. “What happened?”

  She gasped. “You didn’t see it.” Her hand shot to her chest in mock distress, but her eyes were alight with way too much salacious interest for me to buy that. “The article on today’s TENews. There’s a letter from your kidnapper. About you. From him.”

  “Him?” My voice didn’t sound like my own as it had risen several octaves in panic. The skin crawled on the back of my neck. “What did he say?” I whispered as horror settled over me.

  I’d let the quiet of the last few weeks convince me that he’d disappeared, that he wouldn’t mess with me again. But now, I knew that peace was about to be blown to bits as I waited for my friend to tell me what she knew.

  She patted my hand. “He was actually very nice about you. Talked about how much he loved you, and how you’re going to be the next big, famous star.”

  My breath began to pant out of me.

  I’m going to make you famous.

  “He said that everyone didn’t see it yet, but they would. What you could become.”

  Jonah wrapped his arm around me. “Come on,” he whispered in my ear. He gently urged me out of my chair.

  “No,” Minerva whined. “Where are you taking her? I haven’t told her the best part. She’s going to miss class.”

  I could feel his hands on me, my body, my face, my hair and those awful, horrible words echoing inside my head. I’m going to make you famous. I’m going to make you famous.

  Shivers rolled up and down my spine, my entire body. I felt like I was about to shatter apart, just fly into little pieces right here in the lecture hall of the economics building with all my classmates looking on in horror. There goes the girl who couldn’t keep it together, they’d say, and they’d laugh at the pun.

  Jonah had his arms wrapped around me, and my feet were hardly touching the floor as he rushed me down the hall, away from my classroom. To where, I didn’t know.

  “Wait.” I dug my feet in, and Jonah stopped.

  “It’s okay,” he soothed. “I’m getting you out of here.”

  “No.” My voice was tremulous so I took a deep breath and said it again. “No!” I stepped away from him and while my legs still felt like jelly from the panic attack that almost was, they managed to hold me up. “I can’t run. I won’t run. He stole my control once. I won’t hand it over to him again. Let’s go back to class.”

  Every part of my body shook inside, but I tried not to let Jonah see that as he examined me, as if trying to make a decision.

  I wasn’t going to wait for him to decide. It was my choice. My control. I was wrenching it back from that madman, right here, right now. I turned and tried to stride confidently back to my class.

  The lecture had already begun when I slipped inside the door. My professor halted speaking, and most the room turned to look at me since he did.

  I slipped into the first empty seat I saw and muttered a soft, “Sorry.”

  Luckily, the professor didn’t make anything more of it, just gave me a slight nod and continued. I felt Minerva’s stunned gaze on me, but I was barely holding it together, so I didn’t look to her.

  Jonah slipped into the seat beside me, took hold of my hand, and squeezed it. That touch kept me anchored for the next hour. I had no idea what my professor had said, but when the lecture was over, I could breathe again. I’d done it...fought through my fear and stayed in control of my life. It may not have been pretty or ideal, but I’d done it. For now, that was enough.

  That and Jonah, a strong force beside me, helping me face it all—the fear, the unknown, and the dread about when the next shoe would drop.

  JONAH

  Never in my life had I admired a single other person as much as I did Elle. She’d gone to every single one of her Monday classes. I could see the fear, feel her shaking every time I held her hand, but she did it.

  I couldn’t even begin to understand why that fact had become so important to her, but I watched her fight her demons and stick to going to the classes, ignoring the whispers that followed her everywhere. But now as we headed home, the exhaustion from the day had finally claimed her. She was sound asleep in the passenger seat of her Rav4 as I tried not to leave indents from my fingers in her steering wheel.

  They wouldn’t have to worry about this guy touching her again, because once he got within arm’s reach of me, he was a dead man. For him to taunt and terrify her like this was unforgivable.

  Elle was one of the most generous, loving, kind women I’d ever met. For someone to threaten that...no, just no. He would never get near her.

  However, Elle was worried about someone else. Mrs. Latham hadn’t been on her bench this afternoon.

  That had sent Elle into a panic. “What if Mrs. Latham saw the article and that’s why she didn’t show up?”

  I had to remind Elle that Mrs. Latham had stayed blissfully ignorant of Elle’s infamy before, and that was probably still the case. Something had probably just come up. Maybe she wasn’t feeling well or had another appointment.

  But that had sent Elle into another blind panic as she worried about Mrs. Latham at home alone where no one could help her if she needed it. So, I’d promised to see what I could do about finding her. That was much easier said than done, since all Elle knew about her was her last name, that her husband had died last year, and that she spend Monday and Wednesday afternoons on that bench, feeding the pigeons.

  All in all, it had been one hell of a day and as I glanced over at Elle, my heart twisted. I didn’t want to leave her in Dillon’s care tonight. I’d started doing that a week ago just for the sake of my own sanity. But today, she had a level of vulnerability that called to me. While she’d built this façade of strength around her all day, I had seen little glimpses of helplessness and fear. I wanted to be the one to fix it all for her.

  We pulled into the parking garage, and I texted to Dillon that we were on our way up to her apartment.

  He texted back. Good. We have a situation.

  Damn. That didn’t sound promising, especially after an already difficult day.

  Elle hadn’t moved since I turned off the car. I gently shook her shoulder, and her eyes fluttered open. She recognized me immediately and gave me a small secret smile, full of warmth and ha
ppiness. Then the memories of the day must have cascaded down over her. She stiffened, her smile fell, and she sat up with a gasp. “Sorry. I must have fallen asleep.”

  “It’s okay. You want me carry you up to your castle like the sleeping princess?”

  She laughed, exactly the response I’d been hoping for. “Um, no. I think I can handle it.”

  “Okay, but you know I’m here for you if you need it.”

  She stilled. “I do. I know.” She met my gaze, suddenly so serious. “And that backup has meant more to me than you will ever realize. Thank you, Jonah.”

  I couldn’t believe she’d said that. Shock held me still for a split second until I realized she was getting out of the car without me. I rushed to catch up with her.

  When we entered the apartment, Dillon was standing in front of the T.V. with a huge frown on his face.

  “What’s going on?” I asked him.

  “See for yourself.” He gestured toward the screen.

  Elle gasped in shock.

  It was TENews, and they were interviewing Minerva. “Honestly, I think she made the whole kidnapping up as a plea for help,” Minerva told the reporter.

  “Why would she do that?” the reporter asked.

  Minerva’s eyes grew wide and fearful. “She has this creepy, overbearing new boyfriend. Something’s off with them. He drags her off when she obviously doesn’t want to go. He’s just really bossy. It’s scary, you know? I’m worried about her. She’s such a sweet girl. To see her with a **bleep** like that.” Minerva shook her head. “It’s just...sad. I feel for her. She obviously feels like she has to cry out before people will pay attention, and she can escape him. His name is Jonah Sutton, and the guy is a creeper with a capital ‘C.’ If you ask me, that’s who she’s afraid of, not this phantom kidnapper.”

  The shot on the television flipped so that only the reporter stood in the screen. “You heard it here first on TENews. Illumination Wilcox might be the victim of domestic abuse, but we’re not just taking this one person’s word for it. Here is video of the victim and her boyfriend taken earlier today.”