by Sable Hunter
Maybe one day.
Tanner held the door for her, and for a moment their eyes met and held. He kept waiting for her to remember him, but he saw no recognition in her face...only… What was he seeing? If it had been any other woman, he’d have sworn he saw a flicker of interest, a glimpse of hunger. But she blinked her eyes and it was gone – probably his imagination. “Have a good evening, Desiree. I’ll bring buy a load of wood tomorrow to refill your bin.”
“Thank you.” She stepped outside, and the chill that hit her skin was as much from leaving his presence as from the Texas wind blowing through the pines.
–CHAPTER THREE–
Tanner felt like a teenager, standing at an angle by the window so he could watch Desiree leave. If she turned around, she wouldn’t see him staring at her. His heart was beating so hard in his chest, he thought it might burst through his skin. Hell, he didn’t know why he was reacting this way. She was just as elusive and out of his reach standing next to him as she’d been three states away.
Disgusted, he turned around and forced himself to not gaze longingly after what he could never have. He took the cookies and replaced the lid on the tin. Picking up his coffee cup, he set it in the sink by hers. A pang of loneliness hit him. Just the sight of the two cups side by side made him wistful.
Slamming the flat of his palm down on the cabinet, he resolved to get a grip on himself. He needed to think about something else, or at least call one of his friends and strike up a conversation.
As if on cue, his cell rang. Pulling it out of his back pocket, he saw it was Bowie. “Hey, bro.” Truer words he’d never spoken, the man was like a brother to him. “What’s up?”
“Hey, I’m putting in my order for a bit of your time right after the New Year.”
“Sure. What do you need?”
“Some researchers at North Carolina State have developed some micro-technology to implant in insects in order to use them to help locate victims in disaster situations such as earthquakes. They want some experienced help in testing out their new products.”
Tanner was surprised. “What kind of insects? What are you talking about, like cyborg cockroaches?”
Bowie laughed. “Well, yeah. I don’t know the details but cockroaches can go in small holes, up walls – a helluva lot of places men and even dogs can’t go.”
“What will they think of next?” He hesitated a moment, then added. “I don’t know how much help I’ll be, but I’ll be glad to go with you.”
“Stop it, I know what you’re doing.” Bowie chided him. “Quit punishing yourself for something that wasn’t your fault.”
“I’m not so sure about that.”
“There’ll come a day when I’m going to convince you otherwise, even if I have to beat some sense into you.” Bowie grumbled. “Besides, they’re going to pay well for our time and expertise.”
“Count me in, Bowie. We’ll say this is my swan song. I’m using the money I have saved to invest in more cattle and build an extra cabin. I’m going to be a gentleman rancher.”
“Hell, this is not your swan song. And you may be a rancher, but the gentleman part is questionable,” Bowie teased, continuing on to venture into familiar territory. “Speaking of counting you in… I wish you’d change your mind and come eat Christmas dinner with me and Cassie.”
Tanner couldn’t help but smile. His friend was nothing if not persistent. He was silent for a time, then he cleared his throat. “Desiree’s here.” Only recently, he had confessed to Bowie about the sad, serendipitous way his life was entwined with one of the queens of country music.
“Desiree Holt? Your Desiree?”
“Yes, but she’s certainly not my Desiree. And it’s a secret, she’s here under another name. She rented a cabin until after the New Year. She seems to be having some kind of problem.”
“Mums the word. I hope whatever is up with her is nothing serious.” He sounded solemn, then he snorted. “I don’t blame you for staying there for the holiday. Looks like Santa came early.”
“It’s not like that…” Tanner was about to protest further when he heard Cassie’s voice calling Bowie’s name. “Looks like you’re being summoned.”
“Yea, I hear my baby.” Tanner could hear the smile in Bowie’s voice. “Keep me informed. And if you change your mind, don’t hesitate to just show up. Or come for Christmas Eve if that would suit you better. Cassie has a surprise she can’t wait to show you.”
Tanner heard the excited mysterious tone in his friend’s voice. “Oh, really?” He recognized a bit of arm twisting when he heard it. “Well…we’ll see.”
“Bring Desiree with you. We’d love to have her.”
Yea, like that would happen. Tanner didn’t make any promises. “Thanks, Bowie. I’ll talk to you later,” he said, a bit relieved to get off the phone. The more he talked to Bowie, the more his friend would figure out how much this was affecting him. And Tanner didn’t want to have to explain to someone else what he didn’t really understand himself.
Slipping his phone into his back pocket, he headed out to feed the cows.
Over in Desiree’s cabin, she was in the middle of a phone call of her own. She’d called her manager to let him know she was all right. “No, I’m not ready to come back, Randy. I’m staying here until just before the concert.”
“Is it doing you any good or are you still sleeping in your car?”
Desiree sighed. She was tired of his attitude. The man couldn’t understand why she didn’t pull herself up by her bootstraps and just be like she used to be. “No, I didn’t sleep in the car.” She didn’t say she slept out on the porch in the cold – that wouldn’t impress him. Even now, she saw that the sun was getting low in the sky. The familiar sensation of anxiety wiggled up her spine and Desiree knew there would be no staying inside tonight either. Maybe she could run an extension cord and use one of the electric blankets she’d seen in the closet. “Have the police uncovered any new leads on Stark?” Just saying her stalkers name left an unpleasant taste in her mouth.
“None. The only consolation is that if he’s watching the country music channel or reading the gossip rags, at least he thinks you’re in New York for the holidays.”
“Yes, your idea about leaking those unpublished photos from last year’s trip was ingenious.”
They talked for a few more minutes, until a rap on her door gave Desiree a good excuse to hang up. All the way to the front, her heart was skipping beats. What if it was her handsome neighbor? She smiled, liking the idea more than she thought she would.
But when she opened the door, it was Mrs. Foster. “Hello.”
“Miss Holt, I came to check on you.”
“Thank you so much. I’m doing well.” She stepped back to let the woman in. “What can I do for you?”
“Well, you can tell me how you like this new recipe for Texas Trash. I’ve taken liberties with the original and added some new ingredients.” Mrs. Foster winked at Desiree. “I’ll let you guess what they are, so don’t read this until after you try some.” She handed Desiree a folded recipe card.
“Thank you.” She opened the lid of the plastic container and took a whiff of the delectable snack mix. Immediately, she sneezed. “Red pepper, for sure.”
Mrs. Foster laughed. “Yes, my husband likes it spicy.”
Desiree replaced the lid and set the container on the table. “I baked cookies today, I have a few left. I took most of them to Mr. Barron.”
Mrs. Foster clapped her hands together. “Oh, I’d much rather him have them than me.” She patted her hips. “I have to watch my figure for Mr. Foster. Besides, there is no worthier human being on earth than Tanner Barron.”
“Really?” She wanted to know more.
“Yes, he’s saved - I don’t know how many lives.” She waved her hands in the air. “A bunch.”
“Wow. How?”
“He’s one of those people they call when someone gets lost in the mountains or in the wilderness. He’s traveled all over
the country and around the world, climbing mountains, diving, riding horses through the wilderness and rescuing people who’ve lost their way.”
Desiree felt her heart swell with pride. “I’m really impressed. He sounds like he has a big heart.”
“He does and he’s very brave.”
Mrs. Foster was Tanner’s number one fan, no doubt about it. She mentally compared him to the men she knew back in Nashville who pursued her and she had to admit they came up short.
After her visitor left, Desiree tried to keep busy, dreading the setting of the sun. She sat at the kitchen table working on song lyrics, basking in the glow of one of those seasonal-affected-disorder lamps that mimicked the bright light of day. Unreasonably, the encroaching darkness ramped up her sense of panic, so Desiree took the smallest dose of her anxiety medicine that she could and laid aside her notebook to play Solitaire until she could feel a sense of calm overtake her.
After about ten hands of the card game that she mindlessly spread out in front of her, moving the black cards to the red cards, Desiree took her sleep aids and hoped for the best. When she was so tired she couldn’t hold her eyes open, she took a blanket and went to the porch, plugging it into an outside outlet. Laying down on the chaise lounge, she lay shivering, reciting words of her songs until she could endure the act of closing her eyes and surrendering to sleep…
By midnight, Tanner found himself outside Desiree’s cabin. When he climbed up the steps to the porch – sure enough, there she was. She didn’t have enough cover. Dammit! He didn’t understand what was going on, but the protective instincts in him were riding high. The electric blanket on top wouldn’t do a crap bit of good in this weather unless there was other quilts on top of it. Moving as quietly as he could, he went inside and found more cover to spread over her. After he had her weighed down with enough dense blankets to his satisfaction, he took a seat at the edge of the porch, covered himself with an extra quilt and leaned back to watch over her. Sleep came slowly, but just being near her made him feel better…
The next morning, a slight noise brought Desiree’s eyes wide open. She became instantly aware of the extra cover and saw Tanner making his way across the yard to the trail that led to his cabin. This time she didn’t scream, she smiled. This extraordinary man had taken care of her during the night. “You are a white knight, aren’t you?” she muttered to herself. The moment she said it, an ache formed in her chest. She’d never known the name of the man who rescued her in Austin. Even after all this time, she offered up thanks for him. And now she’d run into another gallant gentleman.
As she thought about it, she wondered at the slight resemblance. This man was taller and wider. While she couldn’t recall her original white knight’s face clearly, the scruff of beard that Tanner wore like a dream could cloud the dim memory.
“Stop it!” she chided herself for the wishful thinking. Life wasn’t a country song. Happy endings were difficult to come by.
* * *
As he’d promised, Tanner loaded up the small trailer behind his four-wheeler and started out to make sure Desiree had enough wood to keep her warm. Christmas Eve was almost upon them and despite his resolve to ignore the holidays, he was feeling a bit like celebrating. He had no idea if she’d go for his idea, but if he didn’t give it a shot, he’d never forgive himself.
Inside her cabin, she saw him coming. Desiree remembered Tanner saying he would bring more logs for her fireplace. To pay him back for his kindness, she’d made a big pot of soup and kept it simmering on the stove in hopes he’d show up and join her for a bowl. The idea that he’d sat by her during the chilly night so she wouldn’t be alone touched her more than he would ever know.
When he tapped on the door, she had to calm herself so she wouldn’t race over to open it. Seeing his arms were full of wood, she stepped back to make room for him to come in. “Thank you so much.”
“Just doing my duty.” Tanner made his visit sound so offhand, he almost winced. Nothing could have been further from the truth.
“Of course.” The words she’d been about to utter died on her lips. Maybe she was reading more into last night than she should have. Perhaps he just took his position as an innkeeper very seriously. As he squatted down to stack the split logs neatly, she found herself staring at his perfect denim covered ass. Licking her lips, she just dove in. “I made a pot of beef vegetable soup. I thought it would taste good in this nippy weather. Could I interest you in a bowl?”
Tanner chewed on his lower lip, trying to fight back a smile. She was behind him, she couldn’t see his face, so he didn’t fight too much. Desiree didn’t know it, but she could talk him into just about anything. “I’m very interested,” Tanner stated flatly – let her take that anyway she wanted to.
Desiree’s heart flipped over at his comment. As he stood, she turned toward the kitchen to make good on her offer. The heat she felt on her cheeks surprised her. My goodness, she was on the wrong side of thirty-five, not some blushing teenager.
Tanner stoked the flames and laid another log on the fire before heading to the kitchen where his almost decade long crush was about to let him taste her wares. “Smells great, I haven’t taken the time to eat. This will hit the spot.”
As he sat down, she placed the pottery bowl filled with fragrant soup in front of him. Steam was rising and winding its way to the ceiling. “I’m glad you could join me. I saw you leaving this morning. Watching over me last night was incredibly sweet.” Taking her place at the chair across from his, she held her own bowl between her palms, warming her hands. “I really don’t know how to thank you. I hope you found some way to keep warm.”
Tanner could think of a few things she could do to thank him, but he wouldn’t get ahead of himself. “I had on clothes and I covered up with a blanket too. There was no way I was going to let you sleep out in the cold with a pack of coyotes wandering nearby. There’s even been reports of a panther or two in the area.”
Desiree’s eyes bugged out. “You’re kidding, right?”
“Nope, I’m not.”
She moved nervously in her chair. Before she knew it, the words just came tumbling out. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. Sleep in the car, I guess.” She bowed her head, looking ashamed. “Since this last attack and my surgery, I’ve developed claustrophobia and an inability to surrender to sleep.” Dashing a tear from her cheek with the tips of her fingers, she let out a ragged breath. “I came to Texas hoping to get past this, I don’t…”
Tanner caught one of her waving hands and held it still on the table. “Last attack? You’re talking about someone assaulting you other than those two thugs in the alley?”
His words rocked Desiree to her core. “My manager kept the details of that night out of the papers. I sung about it, yes. But I never described what happened to anyone. It was just too hard to talk about.” Desiree stared at him, her eyes wide with shock. “You’re him.” She swallowed nervously. “When you were so good to me, the thought briefly crossed my mind. I dismissed it for wishful thinking.” Her voice hadn’t rose much more than a whisper. “That scar on your side…it’s from the…” Clutching his hand as if holding on to a lifeline, she continued. “You’re the one who fought those men for me!”
Tanner looked deep into her beautiful eyes. “Yes, it’s me.” Passing his thumb over her palm, he squeezed her hand. “Looks like fate was determined for our paths to cross again. Now, what’s this about a second attack?”
Desiree ignored his question. “Didn’t you ever hear the song? Why didn’t you contact me so I could thank you properly?”
Tanner leaned back, his face a stoic mask. “You know I did. I attended a concert in Nashville a few years ago. I tried to get backstage. I sent you a note. I waited and waited until someone finally told me you’d left.” Squaring his shoulders, he shrugged off the hurt. “It was obvious you didn’t really want to see me. I never tried again.”
Desiree studied his face while she searched her memory. “No one brought
me the note.” Unable to suppress the impulse, she sprang from her chair and came around to hug him. “I’m so glad to see you. Thank you so much.”
Tanner stiffened. “You thanked me that night in the alley, Desiree.” Her closeness almost took his breath away. He wanted to turn her in his arms and pull her down on his lap, but before he could she’d released him and moved back to the other side of the table.
“No, I didn’t. You left so quickly and I guess I was in shock. It was a day or two later before it hit me how very serious it all could’ve been. You saved my life.”
“I’m just glad I was there to help you.” He noticed she was trembling. “Now, tell me about this last attack,” he repeated. “Were you hurt?”
Desiree eased back down in her chair. She didn’t immediately answer his question. “There’s a man who started out as a fan, by the name of Elliot Stark. It all began innocently enough, but he became sort of obsessed.” Extricating her hand from his, she nervously traced the top of the soup bowl. “He started following me, sending explicit notes.” Looking up at Tanner, she nervously licked her upper lip. “That’s probably the reason I didn’t get yours. My manager and assistant quit bringing notes to me so I wouldn’t worry so much.”
“This fan attacked you? Did they catch him?” Tanner clenched his hands into fists. If there was one thing he detested, it was a man who would physically take advantage of a woman.
“The situation escalated over time. He climbed the fence, broke into my house. I thought I was safe on tour, but I wasn’t. The police told me he quit his job so he could follow my bus. One night he caught me outside of a gas station bathroom. We struggled and I fell and hit my head. I had to have surgery.”