Her Second Chance

by Bette Ford

  The wanting started the moment his eyes met hers across the crowded restaurant. He knew she was special. The attraction was strong and immediate. His pursuit of her had been packed with hurdles. Like an Olympic champion, he didn’t shy away from a challenge. Determination and drive were no mystery to him. He grew up with parents who believed anything worthwhile didn’t come easily.

  Silently, he mouthed Trenna’s name, unable to get the feel of her dark, beautiful skin out of his mind. She was so incredibly soft and her lush mouth unbelievable sweet. He adored the way she tasted. Who was he kidding? He loved everything about her. A single night with her didn’t come close to being enough. He couldn't stop wanting her. He swore beneath his breath.

  Considering how badly the evening ended, it was unlikely he’d ever have more time with her. Being with her, holding her in his arms had been remarkable. There was no comparison. For so long he'd imagined what it would be like to be with her. Nothing had prepared him for her sweetness. Being with her had been unforgettable.

  He’d lost count of the number of times he grabbed his phone. He longed to hear her voice, only to be brought up short. She had hurt him, rejected him, compared him to her another man, and then asked him to leave. She couldn’t have been clearer when she said she wanted nothing to do with him.

  Time and time again, he tried but failed to push all thoughts of her from his mind. Work had become his solace and made the daylight hours tolerable. Unable to sleep, his nights were unbearably long. And when he finally managed to sleep, he dreamed about Trenna.

  He detested those dreams. They were hot and steamy, brimming from his longing and hunger for her. The dreams were proof that he could no more control his need for her any more than he could sprout wings and fly. The dreams invariably left him hard, aching for her and dripping with sweat. And he woke alone, his arms empty and his heart aching.

  Hearing Trenna’s name was enough to set him on edge. He found it highly irritating that nearly everyone in the building had something good to say about her. The cleaning crew would mention how thoughtful she was, or one of the security guards, on duty at the front desk, would brag about her delicious, homemade cookies or breads. He needed no reminders that she was warm, generous, and special. Or that she was beautiful on the inside and outside. He was unlikely to forget Trenna didn’t want anything to do with him.

  Even his assistant had gotten in on the chatter. Because her little nephew was enrolled in the nursery school, she frequently boasted that Trenna was particular about her staff and she truly loved the children. Darrin almost told her to shut up. He didn’t bother to ask himself why should he care, Trenna hired people who genuinely cared about the children. He ground his teeth in frustration. If he did not know better he’d assumed that Trenna had paid them to rave about her.

  He muttered aloud, “You would think everyone around here loved her as much as I do.”

  Love? Where had that come from? Love? Was this love? If this was what being in love felt like then he’d pass. He flatly refused to love a woman who didn’t want him.

  The problem wasn't with him. Despite what she claimed, Trenna wasn’t really free. Even though she no longer wore Martin McAdams’ wedding band, she still used his name. And she used his name because her heart belonged to him... her dead husband.

  For weeks, he had been blind to the truth. He wrongly assumed she understood how he felt about losing his father. He’d only been partly correct. She understood because of her own loss: those of her parents and then that of the love of her life. Only he hadn’t realized how she felt until they’d made love.

  It had taken a while but finally he was able to piece it all together. Why she was unwilling to go out with him, give him a real chance, and why she had no room in her heart for him. She still grieved for Martin because she was still very much in love with him.

  But the absolute worst for him was when she slipped up and said “…with Martin.” Clearly, she had been comparing the two of them. And there was no doubt in his mind that he was the one who came up lacking. That pain had been devastating.

  Why had she bothered to say yes? Evidently, for a short time, desire had gotten the best of her. What other reason could she have for letting him make love to her? Well, she had certainly recovered her equilibrium quick enough. After a single lovemaking session, she had turned her back on him and what they shared.

  He ground his teeth in mute frustration. No way! What he felt for her couldn’t be love. How could it when this felt like he’d descended into hell? And to make matters worse, the longer he was forced to go without seeing her or hearing her voice was pure torment.

  What was he supposed to do? How much longer could he ignore her, pretend he hadn't sampled her sweetness? He was already on edge; his temper was razor-sharp these days. He knew that being around him was no picnic. Most days, it was all he could do not to bellow his disappointment like a wounded bear.

  Despite his brother’s attempts to encourage him, Darrin knew there was no fixing it. He needed to face that there was no relationship to repair. All they had ever had was a one-night-stand. He had tried but couldn’t get it through his brother’s thick head that he was neither like his twin nor was Trenna like Megan. He was so sick of Douglas offering to talk to Trenna for him that he’d threatened to punch him in the face if he didn’t leave it alone.

  Unfortunately their mother had overheard their conversation, and began asking questions and giving him advice. It was just his rotten luck that she adored Trenna. His mother had told him in no uncertain terms to get his act together. She wanted grandbabies.

  Darrin had no trouble recalling every intimate detail of being wrapped in Trenna’s arms. The memory was so vivid it filled his dreams, every kiss, every caress, and every delicious detail. He knew exactly what he had said to her and done to her. Her sweet response to his lovemaking was seared inside his head. There was no doubt that she climaxed several times. Her last climax was so intense it triggered his. And the force of his release had been so powerful that he suspected he’d lost consciousness for a few seconds. Being inside of her, a part of her had blown his mind. He could never forget the magic of her sweet heat stroking him from base to tip.

  Incredible! He was amazed by how badly he wanted her again. In record time, she had him rock hard and ready for more. No woman had ever pleasured him and affected him so deeply. Once hadn't come close to being enough for him. Had he ever been in more need? He didn't think so.

  He had it bad, so much so that he forgot about everything, including the used condom he had been wearing. She had stared at his erection as if in shock, and very upset. Had she been sore and believed he was taking advantage? Did she think he was being careless, putting her at risk?

  But that one time with Trenna had messed with him. He hadn’t been with another woman since that night. And he was a virile man with a strong sex drive. He wasn’t cut out to live like a monk. It had been that way since she had refused to go out with him, then made love, and rejected him. She had broken his heart and turned his life inside out.

  Enough with this brooding about her! He still had work to finish.

  14

  Her heart rate drummed in her ears as her high heels sank into the hall’s plush carpeting outside of Darrin’s office. His name was etched in bold black lettering on the frosted glass-panel. The door was partially opened. Her hands were unsteady when she knocked.

  “Hi,” Trenna called, “do you have a minute?”

  Floor to ceiling oak shelves lined three walls of the spacious interior. Adjacent to the massive oak desk was a picture window. Twin taupe leather chairs sat front of the desk.

  When Darrin looked up from the notes he was making, his pen slipped from his fingers and rolled across the surface of the desk. He didn’t say anything, but his dark blue eyes moved over her curvy figure. His gaze lingered on her small features before he looked away.

  He quirked a dark brow. “Get off on the wrong floor again?”

  “Not this
time, I’d hoped we could talk.” Nervously, she smoothed the collar of her pale-pink turtleneck sweater that she’d teamed with a burgundy wool pant suit. Hoping to hide the jitters attacking her stomach, she lifted her chin. “I was getting ready to leave when I noticed your car in the lot…” Her voice trailed off. She had to clear her throat, before she said, “You didn’t answer my question. Do you have a minute?”

  He nodded, as he rose to his feet, gesturing to the formal seating area where a large bronze, sectional leather sofa was positioned on a beautiful russet oriental area rug.

  Trenna did her best not to notice the way his tailor-made navy suit followed the lines of his long, muscular frame or the way the top two buttons of his pale-blue silk shirt were undone. The material emphasized the width of his wide chest and his trim mid-section. A red, dark blue, and white striped tie had been flung over his suit coat, which hung on the back of his chair. He looked good.

  Looking at him brought back memories of their love-making and caused her heart to pick up speed. She had tried, but nothing stopped her from thinking about him, caring about him, and wanting him. The longing was essential, as natural as her next breath.

  A muscle jumped in his cheek as if he were gritting his teeth, but his voice was even when he asked, “Care for something to drink?” He indicated the single-serve coffeemaker. “There’s gourmet coffee, tea, hot chocolate, hot cider, and bottled water. What would you like?”

  “Nothing.” Because her legs were shaking, Trenna sat down. “Very nice. Your mother does excellent job of decorating.”

  “Thanks.” He seemed surprised that she remembered.

  Hoping to fill the tense silence, she asked, “Did she decorate your brother’s office as well?”

  “Yes and our lobby.” Frowning, he got straight to the point. “Trenna, why are you here? The last time we spoke you couldn’t get rid of me fast enough. Something change?”

  “You’re still angry.”

  “I’m confused. You’re here but you won’t look me in the eye. And you haven’t answered my question. What changed?”

  She looked at him when she said, “Me. I owe you an apology.”

  Darrin arched an eyebrow, but didn’t comment. Instead he got up and crossed to the bookshelf that held a liquor tray. He reached for two squat crystal tumblers and poured. He held a glass out to her.

  “No thanks. Darrin, I’m not sure I even thanked you for introducing me to your friends, the—”

  He interrupted, “I don’t know what game you’re playing but I don’t find it amusing.”

  “I’m not playing at anything.” She insisted, “I’m trying to apologize.”

  “For what?” He put the glass down without taking a sip. “Inviting me into your bed? Or kicking me out after you came?” He shrugged broad showers, “We had sex. It’s over and best forgotten.”

  Shocked by his candor, she repeated, “Forgotten?“ It was a struggle to control her emotions. Reluctantly, she admitted, “I’ve tried to pretend nothing happened, but it hasn’t worked.” Unable to remain still, she jumped up and began to move restlessly around the room. She stood in front of the window staring out at the city lights before she said, “I came here tonight hoping we could talk, that I could make you understand.

  “What happened between us was totally unexpected. I didn’t have time to process it, make sense of it. It was easier to put the blame for it on you rather than where it belonged…on me. I felt guilty because I let things go too far.”

  She didn’t turn around, but took a breath before confessing, “It was a shock to me because until that night I had only been with one man…my husband. I wasn’t prepared and was quickly overwhelmed. After…” Trenna stopped, unable to find the right words.

  “After…” Darrin prompted.

  She sighed, “Afterwards, I was very upset,” she forced herself to say. “I honestly didn’t know how I felt and that scared me. You were never the problem, I was. I should have told you about Martin instead of asking you to leave. I’m sorry I handled things poorly.”

  Frowning, he said, “Pretty speech. I might have believed it, if you made eye contact, but you never looked at me. It’s over and I’d rather forget that night ever happened.” He glanced at his watch. “I was on my way out.”

  Although hurt by his cool demeanor, she slowly turned to face him. “What’s the hurry? Do you have a date?”

  “Why ask? Trenna, you were clear when you said you don’t care what I do or who I see, as long as it’s not you.”

  “That’s not true!”

  “Since when? How many times have you accused me of being a player? I believe you said a no-good womanizer. And you say you’re not playing games?” He paused, running a hand over his close-cut natural before he reluctantly admitted, “No, I don’t have a date.” He chuckled, “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were jealous.”

  “It’s not funny!”

  “As long as I’m not sleeping with you, you don’t care.”

  “If I didn’t have feelings for you, I wouldn’t have slept with you.”

  His entire body tensed from fury. “You threw me out of your house! Now you’re telling me you care?” He scoffed, “Get real, Trenna! How many times have I asked you out? Too many to count. Every single time you told me you weren’t interested. Seems to me, you should be celebrating that I finally got the message and have left you alone.” “Just like that”—he snapped his fingers—“problem solved.”

  “Darrin, I said I was sorry! I never suspected that you might—”

  “Suspected what?” he interrupted. “That you might hurt me? That I might actually have feelings for you? Not that it still matters, since we both know it’s over. You can relax, I won’t bother you again.”

  Trenna stared at him, feeling as if her heart was breaking.

  Darrin was the first to break the silence. “But there was only one thing left to clear up. Since the storm, we’ve managed to avoid each other. Yet, tonight you show up here acting as if I don’t know what’s really going on. I know, Trenna.”

  “Know what?” she said calmly, but her hands were clenched so tightly her nails bit painfully into her palms.

  “But what I don’t understand was why? Why did you do it? First you invite me into your home and then you ask me to stay. You let me kiss you, touch you, and hold you. Why did you make me believe I had a chance with you when I never had a hope or a prayer?” He growled impatiently, “But then how could I when there was another man in your life? Why couldn’t you just have been honest with me?”

  “I never lied to you!”

  Ignoring the comment, he glanced at his watch. Then he said impatiently, “It’s late and I’ve had about as much of this game of yours as I can take.”

  Trenna watched as he grabbed his suit jacket from the back of his chair and pulled it on. He tossed in his laptop, along with legal pad and files into his briefcase then slammed it closed. He straightened with the briefcase in hard.

  Stunned by the accusations, Trenna was unaware that Darrin was ready to leave.

  “After you,” he motioned for her to proceed.

  She blinked, then shook her head. “No, I’m not leaving until we’ve finished. I don’t know where you get the idea that there’s someone else. Darrin, I’m not the one who sleeps around. And since we’re being frank, why not admit to being involved with more than half the women in this building at one time or another? Even some of married ones have chased after you.”

  “Really? Have you ever seen me out socially with any of the women in this building?” Darrin didn’t give her a chance to respond. After dropping his briefcase on the desk, he kept coming until he stood directly in front of her. His large frame towered over hers as he glared at her. “Have you? The correct answer would be no! The correct word would be celibate. I haven’t been with anyone in a very long time. I’ve been attracted to you from day one.

  “You may not have noticed, but my friends and family certainly have. I was coping un
til the night you came by the house after my Dad passed. Since then, the wanting has intensified. I feel like an idiot admitting that I’ve been celibate. The instant I saw you, I knew you were the one I’d been waiting for…the only one for me.”

  She confessed, “I had no idea—”

  He interrupted, “My mistake was falling in love with a woman, who’s in love with a dead man!”

  Her eyes went wide and she began to shake as she wondered if she heard correctly. Had he said he loved her? Loved her? A sudden rush of elation came with the crushing weight of anguish and slammed into her with dual forces. No way! He couldn’t claim to be in love with her, and then in the very next breath accuse her of still being in love with Martin!

  Instead of screaming at him, she said quietly, “You’re wrong. I’m not in love with Martin.” Trenna swallowed down her keen disappointment. “My life with Martin’s over.”

  When she moved to Detroit, she had permanently left her troubled past and painful marriage behind her. Determined to make a fresh start and a new life for herself, she had succeeded beyond her wildest dreams. She had worked tirelessly to make her nursery school into something she could be proud of. Her home was hers alone. She had bought and decorated it to suit her taste. In the years she’d been on her own, she had become independent and confident.

  Never again would she repeat the mistakes of getting involved with a controlling man. It had been her experience that lawyers in particular had that tendency. She had wasted enough years trying to please a man. When she started to date she felt safe going out with male friends. She was working hard plus having fun. It had taken a few years, but she felt as if her life was back on track.

  When she met Darrin, the attraction was strong and immediate, so much that it unnerved her. He was too much, too male, too good-looking, and too self-assured. Alarmed, Trenna had run in the opposite direction. She didn’t want to get involved with him; she wasn’t interested in a relationship and had no intensions of ever remarrying. Once was enough. She needed no reminders of past mistakes or her inadequacy.