Alien in the House

by Gini Koch

  “What do you mean?” Abner asked. This time he sounded interested.

  “You mean you think it’s Lydia,” Vance said. “I mean, she’s power-hungry, her husband was cheating on her, and she’s vying for the job as Ap—ouch!”

  Rhee stepped on his foot. “I am so terribly sorry,” she said politely. Cliff and Chuckie both had their phones out and were texting like mad.

  “There’s a backroom power struggle going on.” Well, that was easier than doing the whole Sith Lord explanation, and it was still accurate. “In order to curry favor with the big boss, lower level lieutenants have to do things, including kill off people the big boss wants out of the way. They’re in competition with each other for the right-hand man slot. Pia and Lydia were two of these lieutenants.

  “Lydia has no love for Eugene any more—he’s not interested in her Washington career and cheated on her with a woman far more attractive than she is. She’s got no love for Nathalie Brewer, either, who she can conveniently blame Eugene’s straying on. And then Eugene takes up with Pia Ryan, who is also prettier than Lydia and who is also Lydia’s rival for a position she really wants.”

  “How dare you accuse me of anything?” Lydia snapped.

  “It’s pretty easy. You’re not exactly acting like you’re mourning. You’re celebrating, and I don’t think it’s because my daughter just turned one. You saw a chance to turn the tables on everyone and have your cheating husband kill the husband of his first mistress, ensuring that his current mistress would fall out of favor with the big boss.”

  “You have no proof of these ridiculous claims. I’ll sue you for defamation.”

  “The press is eyeing us,” Cliff said in a low voice. “I’m going to get them out of here.” He headed off.

  “That only works if you’re not found guilty.” Looked at my watch. “And, I’m betting that in about fifteen minutes, you’re going to be found guilty.” I looked at Gadoire. “Or you are.”

  “Excuse me?” he sounded shocked out of his mind.

  “I’m not sure if she’s been staying with you all this time because the evidence is at her house, or if she’s been staying with you because the evidence is being planted at your house. If I were a betting girl, which I am, I’d say your house. Which is why we got more than one warrant.”

  “It’s Christmas Day,” Lydia snapped. “There’s no way you could get a warrant that fast.”

  Chuckie’s phone beeped. “Gotten that fast and then some,” he said. “Police in Silver Spring just finished searching Pia Ryan’s house. They found no arsenic, but they did find botulism toxin, in packets identical to the one I found on Eugene after he poisoned Santiago.”

  His phone beeped again. “D.C. police just finished searching Gadoire’s place. There’s a small stash of arsenic and some other very suspicious things. Heading to the Montgomery house now. I wonder what they’ll find?”

  He pulled handcuffs out of his inner pocket. “Lydia Montgomery, I’m arresting you on suspicion of murder and conspiracy.” He slammed the cuffs on her, then pulled out another set. Sometimes I wondered how he carried all the metal and still seemed to saunter everywhere.

  “I want my lawyer,” Lydia said.

  Chuckie smiled. “I’m not taking you to the police. You’re going somewhere much more special. But you won’t be alone. Guy Gadoire, you’re under arrest on suspicion of murder and conspiracy.”

  “Chuckie . . . one moment before you put those cuffs on.” I looked at Gadoire. “Guy, will this arrest cause issues for you?”

  “Hell, yes,” Vance answered for him. “Being arrested for something cool or acceptable, that’s one thing. Being arrested for murdering a bunch of people because you were sleeping with Lydia Montgomery? That’s career death.”

  Guy looked panicked. “Please, Mister Reynolds, you have to believe me—”

  I put up my hand. “Chuckie, I’d take it as a deep, personal favor if you’d wait to arrest Guy until we’re a hundred percent sure that he was involved in any way. Nothing I found suggested it. And I’ll take complete responsibility for him, too.”

  Chuckie and I had known each other since we were thirteen. He knew what I was trying to tell him when I stressed those two words. He nodded slowly and put the cuffs away. “Don’t leave town,” he said to Gadoire. “You’re still a person of interest.”

  Gadoire sagged with relief. “Person of interest is cool,” Vance said reassuringly.

  “Oh, good. Guy, a private word, just for a moment?” He nodded and staggered a couple steps away with me. “Lillian said that you knew why I was calling last night.”

  “Yes, you need a favor.”

  “I need a huge favor, Guy. I need all the bills going through the House and Senate killed or sent back to committee, and I need that to continue to happen until every one of them has the anti-alien wording removed. And it has to happen before January third. I’ll be happy to tell you exactly what needs to come out of each bill if necessary.”

  “Not necessary at all, my dove. I’m happy to do this favor for you.” He glanced at Chuckie. “Especially since you have gone out of your way to defend and protect me.” He turned back to me. “Did she really do all that?”

  “And more. I’d like you to be checked out by our Embassy doctor, to make sure she didn’t, ah, do something to you.” Like turn him into an android. “But, first, Guy, can I count on you? As in, you’re doing this for me out of the goodness of your heart, and not because you expect any kind of payback from me or anyone else connected with American Centaurion later?”

  “Absolutely, my dove. Absolutely.”

  “Wonderful.” Motioned for Rahmi and Rhee to come over. “Please escort our friend down to the Great Tito and ask him to ensure that all is right with Monsieur Gadoire.”

  They hustled Gadoire off and Vance went along. I went back to Chuckie, who was handing Lydia off to Kevin and a nice complement of Field agents. Cliff rejoined us, too. “Press is all gone,” Cliff said. “Moved off for your sake, not hers.”

  “Police are on their way,” Chuckie said. “We can get back to Jamie’s party now. But, before we do, how’d you figure it out?”

  “Someone helped me figure out what was wrong with the picture.”

  CHAPTER 96

  THE REST OF THE PARTY WAS GREAT. Jamie had a fabulous time, and with the press gone and Lydia in custody, I felt pretty decent.

  I hadn’t avenged all the murders of all those people yet, but I’d avenged the ones I could. Reyes, Brewer, even Eugene and Pia. We’d caught all the people responsible for their deaths. Okay, not the Mastermind, but everyone else.

  “You took a real chance with that accusation,” Christopher said while we were munching on cake and Jamie was dancing with Jeff. I had a huge corner piece loaded with icing which I’d claimed as Mother of the Birthday Girl and I was enjoying it. “What if you’d been wrong?”

  “Then I’d have tried again, but she was the only one who fit all the parameters. She was the one who stood to gain the most by Eugene’s being arrested—sympathy, support, and her cheating husband dead, worth a lot. Chance to hurt both her rivals at the same time? Priceless.”

  “I got nothing out of the video tapes. If Clarence was there, even when he slowed down he was at hyperspeed.”

  “As long as he stays dead this time, I’m good with it.” Saw Culver and Abner getting ready to go. “Guard my cake. I am not done with that, so don’t let anyone throw it away and tell Jeff to get his own piece.”

  Trotted after Culver and caught them at the front door. “We were just slipping out,” Culver said. “Abner, be a dear and fetch the car.”

  He sighed. “Of course. Nice seeing you again, Kitty.” He headed off down the street. Had no idea where they’d parked.

  “It was a nice party,” Culver said as she stepped outside. I followed her and shut the door behind me. “And congratulations on getting another friend of mine arrested.”

  Apparently the gloves were off now. Fine by me. “If your
friends weren’t a bunch of murderers that wouldn’t be such a problem. I’d think you’d care more about the friends of yours who were killed.”

  She shrugged. “The dead can’t help you any more, nor can they be helped.” She smiled widely. It remained horrifying. “It was quite neat how you got Guy’s support. You’re far more savvy than you let on, or my husband could recognize.”

  “Backhanded flattery’s nice. Knowing what you want from us for your help would be better.”

  She shrugged. “You’ll do what I want, when I want it. I think that will be the easiest plan, don’t you?”

  “I do not believe that is how it will work,” a familiar voice said from behind Culver. She froze, eyes wide. “You feel my gun in your back, yes?” She nodded. “Good. Look up on the roof across the street. What do you see?”

  We both looked. “Nothing,” Culver said.

  I squinted. “I can just make out a guy with what I think is a sniper rifle.” Or, as I thought of him now, Uncle Surly Vic.

  “Yes, good. Now, you will listen to me. I understand you, Lillian Culver. I know all about you—who you work for, what you do, where you go, where you live, when you sleep. And I know all about your husband, too.”

  “Yes?” she asked. “What do you want? Money?”

  He laughed softly. “No. I want you to be nice to my niece. She is a kind girl, and a brave girl, but she is not a ruthless girl.” His voice hardened. “I, however, am a very ruthless man. You will help her because if you do not, your husband will die, and then you will die.”

  “My clients are powerful people,” Culver said. Had to hand it to her, she wasn’t panicking and while her voice was shaking a little, she didn’t sound totally frightened.

  The Dingo laughed, one of those low bad guy laughs. He was good at it. “Yes, they are. Your clients are ruthless men and women, like me. They understand that the price of the finest weapon is high. You are not the finest weapon, you are a mouthpiece. And they can always find another effective mouthpiece.”

  “You’re bluffing.”

  “I thought you might say that.”

  Abner pulled up in their car. “Nice Bentley. No wonder you guys drove.”

  “You’re going to threaten to kill my husband and then Kitty’s going to tell you not to, and you think that will make me help them without payback? Nice try, but I say again, you’re bluffing.”

  Abner got out of the car. Heard a muffled shot. Abner went down.

  Told myself I was being an idiot, but I couldn’t stop my feet from running to him. Abner was shot and bleeding like crazy, but he wasn’t dead. Picked him up and ran him to the front door. There were no more bullets.

  There was also no more Dingo. Culver was still there, however, and she was white. “He shot him.” She sounded shocked and, for the first time, freaked out.

  “He doesn’t really bluff. He was being nice, and he still is. I think we need to get Abner to a hospital. Or I can take him to our infirmary. However, my uncle is wrong. I’m willing to be ruthless to protect my people, and what they believe in.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Abner’s going to bleed out fast. I can have our staff help him, and probably save his life, or you can take your chances that the ambulance will get him to the Georgetown Medical Center in time. You pick. But know that if he enters the American Centaurion Embassy again, then you are agreeing to my terms, which is that you help me get those bills killed or sent back to committee, and you do it well before New Year’s Eve.”

  She looked down at Abner. I truly had no guess as to what she was going to say. She touched his cheek. “Can I come with him?”

  “Yes.” Managed not to let the relief show in my voice. “But if he can’t be saved, I’m still holding you to the deal. Because if I don’t, then my uncle will kill you next.”

  She nodded. “I know who the Dingo is. I’d imagine how you’ve hidden that you’re his relative would be an interesting story.”

  “One for another day. Let’s get Abner down to the Great Tito.”

  The door opened. Jeff and Raj were there, along with Tito, Nurse Carter, and a gurney. I put Abner on the gurney, Tito and Nurse Carter took off with him. “Melanie and Emily are prepping the surgery,” Jeff said.

  Raj offered his arm to Culver. “I’ll escort you down. I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

  Culver took his arm, then looked at me. “I’ll start making calls as soon as I collect myself.”

  “Sounds good. I’ll put your car into our parking garage.”

  She smiled, a rather normal smile. Well, for her. “Thank you. I sense this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.” She and Raj went after Tito.

  Jeff looked at the car in the street. “Is that their car?”

  “Yeah.”

  “You’re covered with blood.” He pulled out his phone. “Yeah, kid, you and the other jock get down to the front door immediately.”

  “It’s not my blood.”

  “I know.” He looked up and around. “Are they still here?”

  “My ‘uncles’? No idea. Kind of betting on yes, but who knows.”

  “Your mother said she told the authorities everyone is convinced the Dingo killed Cantu while he was in lockdown.”

  “Good. They’ll get a nice payday and their rep will go that much higher.”

  “So that’s why they almost killed a man on our doorstep?”

  “Yeah. Lillian and Guy are the only ones who can get those bills killed in such a way that we and the President won’t be completely screwed.”

  “That was a pretty tough tradeoff, baby.”

  “This? This was nothing compared to what it could have been. This was the only solution that would work in our favor. And my ‘uncles’ knew it would be, too.”

  “I suppose. Reynolds asked me to tell you that they found a plethora of evidence at Lydia’s house. He thinks some of it might have been planted.”

  “Not by me, or by my ‘uncles.’ Maybe by the Mastermind. Or Raul’s chick. But no matter what, Lydia’s out of the running to be the next Mastermind Celebrity Apprentice. So that’s a job damn well done.”

  Len and Kyle appeared. “Kitty, are you okay?” Len sounded freaked out. Kyle looked freaked out. Looked down. Jeff hadn’t been kidding—I was covered with blood. So much for the Optimism of the Elves.

  “Yeah, this isn’t my blood. Need you two to park that Bentley in our garage. While I go change clothes.”

  The boys nodded and went to the car. Jeff took my hand and we went inside and up to our apartment. “Can I put on jeans and a T-shirt now?” I asked as I stripped off the bloodied dress and jumped into the shower.

  “No. I think I want you in something nice. But I’ll take my hat and coat, if that’ll make you happy.”

  “Definitely.” Didn’t have to wash my hair, so I was out of the shower fast. “Where are we going?”

  “Surprise. Just waiting for the rest of the guests to leave. Take your real purse, though.”

  Dumped my handbag into my purse while Jeff handed me the dress he wanted me to wear. It was the green dress I’d had on for our dinner party or, more likely, a duplicate. Akiko had started making duplicates early in her relationship with our Embassy. “You sure this isn’t courting bad luck?”

  He grinned. “Nah, it’s just a sexy dress and I’d like to see you in it again for a happy occasion.”

  “Okay. You’re the boss.”

  Jeff snorted. “Since when? You’re the boss of me, baby, and you always have been.” Then he kissed me, and I decided to table that discussion for another time.

  CHAPTER 97

  ALL THE GUESTS who weren’t our friends and family were gone. Jamie was asleep on Chuckie’s shoulder while he and Naomi talked to his parents. “She fell asleep while we were dancing,” Chuckie said. “Didn’t have the heart to wake her up.”

  Gave his mom and dad a big hug. “When did you two get here?”

  “Just a few minutes ago,” Jeff answered for them. �
��We’ll be back. Keep Jamie, will you, Chuck?” Chuckie nodded as Jeff walked me over to Christopher.

  “What was that all about?”

  “Tell you later.”

  “Fine. Is my cake still around anywhere?”

  “No, it got cleared with everything else,” Christopher said. “And before you whine to me about it, you know you can get more any time.”

  “It’s not the same,” I muttered.

  “I’ll get you more, baby. In a while.” Jeff left me and went over to Pierre. They were instantly in deep discussion. Reader joined them.

  Decided not to worry about it. Found Nathalie. She was leaning against the wall. “How’re you doing?”

  “Oh, alright, I suppose.” She sighed and I put my arm around her. “Tomorrow I get sworn in, to do a job I never wanted to do, to replace the husband I never wanted to lose. Then there will be his funeral, and Santiago’s. I must plan Edmund’s and I wish to attend Santiago’s. I believe your Embassy will be making the arrangements.”

  “I’m sure we will.” Maybe that’s what Jeff, Reader, and Pierre were talking about.

  “I just . . . I would like to have something happy, you know? Christmas has no meaning for me, at least today. I would like to celebrate life and honor the lives gone. Your daughter’s party was lovely, but all we did was talk about political work that needs to be done.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

  Jeff looked around the room. “Great, everyone’s here. Gather up your belongings, folks. We’re taking a little excursion.”

  Saw a floater gate appear, one of the big ones. “Haven’t seen a gate like that since your wedding, Kitty,” Michael said to me.

  “The wedding I missed?” Caroline asked with a laugh.

  “Everyone’s a critic. Where does Jeff have us going? And why?”

  Others were asking this, but they were going through the gate. Raj joined us. “I’ll escort Missus Brewer,” he said, as he took Nathalie’s arm. “We have eight Field teams in the infirmary.”