Resilient

by Patricia Vanasse

  “I’ve got it here, Mrs. Owens. We should be done with it today.” I have never seen someone who loves stories so much.

  We’ve been reading The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks. On the way here today, I bought her the movie, that way she can watch it once we are done with the book. I’m not a type of guy who normally reads romance novels, but I admit that I’m hooked.

  When we’re done with the book, Mrs. Owens is still dabbing at her eyes. “Thank you Adam.” she says. “You’ve made my day with this story. You’re a kind young man, you know? I hope you find a love like this one.”

  I smile to cover any disappointment that might be apparent on my face; this kind of love will never happen to me. “It would definitely be nice, Mrs. Owens, but I believe love like this is on its way out.”

  “No my dear, you’ll find yours one day.” She starts to tilt her bed back again.

  “Mrs. Owens, it’s not over.”

  She looks at me, confused, worried that she misheard.

  “I got you the movie since you liked the characters so much. This way, you’ll always have them with you.”

  “Oh, Adam! That’s so nice of you.” She holds her hands together and smiles. “Before you leave, could you put this in the DVD player for me? I don’t know how those things work.”

  I put the movie in place and give her a hug goodbye. I’m glad I could make her day a little better. So far, I had a good day myself, if it weren’t for my mind, which keeps bringing me back to Livia in the barn this morning.

  I wanted to invite her to the party tonight; there’s something about her that intrigues me. But I could feel some anger surfacing from her. Not strong, but it was still there. So I didn’t have the guts to invite her after all, and I didn’t feel like getting blown off.

  In the hallway, I hear a guy shouting at Kim, the nurse tech at the front desk. I immediately feel his overpowering rage in the air. I stop by the door to check if she needs any help, but at the same time, two security guys walk in.

  “There’s no need for that!” I hear the man saying. “I’m not looking for trouble. I just need a word with Doctor Cooper, and then I’ll leave.”

  “I’ve already informed you that he’s not working today,” Kim answers him.

  “Fine! I’ll figure out another way.” He turns on his heel and leaves the wing, and I watch with confusion as he walks away.

  “Adam?” Kim sees me and frowns. I give her a questioning look—that man was after my dad, after all. “He’s been here before and your dad asked me to send him away. He just wants to cause trouble, no matter what he says.”

  I shake my head and turn to leave. Intriguing or not, it’s none of my business. If I hurry home, maybe I can sneak a nap in before dinnertime.

  7 Livia

  After trying on five different outfits, I go for a mini-dress. Short sleeve, round neck, allover print, curved hem, and open at the lower back. It’s not fancy but it’s New York chic. I don’t know what girls here wear to parties, so I don’t want to be over or underdressed. I put on mid-high wedges, long, slender gold earrings, and matching bracelets. I straighten my hair and put just enough make up on to give some color to my pale face. I take one more look in the mirror and head downstairs.

  “Livia, how nice!” Mom exclaims when she sees me.

  “There is a big hole in your dress.” Gabe says, hanging out from the balustrade behind me.

  “A hole? Oh, no! I didn’t see any… Gabe, where is it?” I am freaking out. I don’t have time to go try on five more outfits.

  “Here!” Gabe says touching my spine. “I can see a big part of your back.”

  Half-relieved, half-irritated, I tell him, “It’s not a hole, honey; that’s how the dress is.”

  “If you say so!” he says, raising his eyebrows and putting up his hands in surrender.

  When we leave for the Coopers’, I drive my own car in case I go to the party afterward. When I pull into their driveway, Mr. Cooper is at the front door, welcoming my parents.

  “Nickolas! Laura! It’s nice to have you over and finally meet your family.”

  “Thanks for having us, William,” my mom says.

  “Come on in and make yourselves at home,” Mr. Cooper says, shaking hands with my parents and patting my brothers on the head. I enter last. “You must be Livia, right? Nice meeting you!”

  “Nice meeting you, too.” I give him a shy smile—I’m getting a weird vibe from him. He has emotional scars, bad ones. Something has happened in his life that was disturbing enough to wound him forever.

  As he’s showing us where we can hang our car keys, I let my guard down and try to reach deep into his psyche, and I’m met with a painful guilt. A bad decision perhaps? But there’s no regret mixed in his emotions. Whatever he did, he knows it was wrong, but he would do it again.

  Mrs. Cooper comes in the room, breaking my concentration toward her husband’s emotions. She greets everyone and introduces her kids: Kevin, a boy a few years younger than me, Caleb, another boy younger than Kevin, and Amanda, who looks about six, the same age as my brothers. Unlike her siblings, she is shy, hiding behind her dad. They all resemble their mom, light eyes and red hair. I guess Adam was the only one who looks more like his dad—where is he?

  We all walk outside to the patio, and I leave my thoughts of Adam inside. It’s covered and has plenty of leather lounge chairs around and a huge, rustic wooden dining table. There is a double-sided stone fireplace right in the middle of the space. I see a door with a cute restroom sign on it, and when I try to get in, the door is locked.

  “Livia!” Mrs. Cooper calls out. “You can use the bathroom inside. That one is under renovation. Go inside, pass the kitchen and turn left, and it’ll be the first door on your right.”

  I make my way into the house, following her directions. The first door on my right is not a bathroom—it looks like a media room, with a big screen TV, a pool table, a foosball table, and a couple of sofas and chairs. I back out and shut the door. Down the hall, I try the next door. It’s locked. At the very end of the hall on my right, finally, is the bathroom.

  I close the door and stare at myself in the mirror. I don’t really need to use the restroom. I just wanted to get away for a couple minutes, Mr. Cooper’s emotions made my stomach turn, and I can’t help but wonder what happened in his life. The darkness of his mind, pressing and cold, envelops me. I think of water and I turn the faucet on, letting the torrent wash over my hands.

  Slowly, I start to regain control of my feelings.

  I’m relieved that Adam isn’t here, but I can’t help wonder why, and if it has anything to do with me. I think he’s unpleasant—maybe the feeling is mutual. Honestly, I don’t know why I care what he thinks of me. It’s better if he keeps his distance, and I don’t have to deal with his arrogance. However, he didn’t seem so bad this morning, or maybe I’m letting his looks cloud my judgment after all.

  I open the bathroom door to get out—and gasp, as I find my face inches away from Adam’s, who was about to reach for the doorknob.

  “Did I scare you?” he asks, entering the bathroom and blocking my way out.

  “Hello to you, too,” I say following him with my eyes.

  “I’m just gonna wash my hands.” He says turns the faucet on. “Did you go out to the lake today?” He watches me in the mirror. “As it turns out, your parents do own half of it.” He grins.

  “Yeah, I’m sure you already knew that. And no, I didn’t go to the lake today.” I lean against the bathroom door, meeting his gaze in the mirror. “I didn’t want to cross paths with someone unpleasant.” Now is my turn to smile.

  “That tone doesn’t really fit you.” He turns to face me. “I’m sure you’re nicer than that.” He walks past me, leaving me to stare at his back. I inhale slowly through my nose, fighting the agitation growing inside of me with the realization that he is right.

  I walk back outside and sit down next to my mom, who is talking to Mrs. Cooper while Dad is standing next to
the grill, where Mr. Cooper is cooking some kabobs and steak. I try to follow Mom and Mrs. Cooper’s conversation: something about the local hospital and how they need surgeons at the ER. When I’m about to ask what they are talking about, Adam strolls out onto the deck.

  “Adam, come over here and be polite, please?” His mom calls him over to her chair. “Laura, this is my older son, Adam.”

  “Nice to finally meet you,” Mom says, shaking his hand.

  Mrs. Cooper puts her arm around Adam’s shoulder. “Livia is also starting senior year next week.” She smiles at him.

  “I know,” he says but doesn’t return the enthusiasm.

  “Didn’t you say you are meeting your friends tonight?”

  “Why?” Adam asks, sitting up on a barstool.

  “You should take Livia with you. It would be great for her to meet new people.”

  My muscles tense, making my body rigid. Adam looks straight at me. “Sure, if she wants to come, I’ll take her.” The edge in his voice sounds somewhat triumphant.

  “Is that the party you told me about, Livia?” Mom asks.

  “Yes, that’s the one,” I say while looking at Adam, who frowns. “Uh, Kyle told me about it,” I add.

  “Of course he did.” He doesn’t look surprised.

  “You don’t have to worry, Laura,” Mrs. Cooper says. “Adam’s friends are great kids, especially Kyle. They’ve been best friends since they were little. He lost his mother very young, but he grew up to be a very nice young man. His dad owns the market in town and Kyle helps out every free moment he has.”

  She really likes Kyle—I can tell when she talks about him. It’s like she is talking about one of her own kids.

  “Is he coming to pick you up?” she asks me.

  “No, I’m going to drive myself.”

  “No need, honey, Adam can drive you.” Mrs. Cooper glances at Adam, who is nodding, but he looks reluctant. “That way, you don’t have to drive at night by yourself. Right, Adam?”

  “Sure.” He smiles. “Why not?” He doesn’t seem as uncomfortable as he did a moment ago, but I’d still rather take my own car.

  “I think it’s great!” Mom says. “It’ll give me some peace of mind to know you are not alone.” Great, I guess that leaves me no choice.

  As soon as we are done eating, Adam wants to leave. “We better get there early before everyone is trashed.”

  “Is there gonna be alcohol?”

  I assumed that much, but I haven’t been to many school parties. Adam dismisses my question with a look on his face that says I’m crazy for even asking. Back in New York, Alyssa threw a girls-only PJ party where I drank two glasses of wine and fell asleep. I woke up with toothpaste all over my face and I learned never to be the first one to fall asleep at a sleepover party. The memory makes me even more reluctant to attend this one.

  Adam and I say goodbye to everyone and head outside. He pulls his car around, then gets out and opens the door for me to get in. So he actually knows how to be nice; surprise, surprise.

  “Thanks,” I say, as pleasantly as I can. He drives a grey Jeep wrangler that’s high off the ground, and the motion of climbing pulls my dress up way too high. “But maybe we should take my car,” I mutter. “That way I don’t risk getting naked by trying to get in your Jeep.”

  “Nothing wrong with being naked in my Jeep,” Adam says, grinning, and I roll my eyes at him. Another personality trait for my list. Eventually I’ll have him all figured out.

  He starts driving and I turn his radio on—no way am I making conversation for the entire drive. I browse through stations and stop when I hear “The Scientist” by Coldplay, my favorite song. I lean back and stare out the window, suddenly a little more at ease.

  “Coldplay, huh?” Adam says. I turn my head to look at him squarely.

  “Yes, my favorite band, and my favorite song.”

  “Does it remind you of someone?”

  I suppose it would be a good song to keep in memory of someone, if I’d ever had a someone. “No, nobody.”

  From the corner of my eye I see him trying to hide a smile. He holds the steering wheel with one hand and rests his elbow on the window.

  “You know, I was going to invite you to this party this morning, but you seemed happy to spend the night watching a movie with your family and I didn’t think you would want to come with me.”

  I look at him, puzzled. Why would he want to ask me to come with him, given that the few times we’ve been around each other, he’s always seemed bothered by me? He sure doesn’t understand that he needs to be nice to someone before befriending them. Another personality trait: unrealistic.

  Nonetheless, I can’t ignore that his confession stirs up something inside of me, and I fight to hide a smile, too.

  “Well, it’s not like you are ever nice to me.”

  “Then you got the right date. Kyle suits you better. He’s always nice.”

  “It’s not like that!” I snap and he turns to look at me. “Kyle told me about the party, and I told him I might show up. He didn’t ask me to go as his date.”

  “I don’t think he got the memo. I heard that he’s bringing a date.” Adam brushes his hair away from his eyes. He has this charming way of messing with it that makes me stare for a moment too long. He looks at me, raising his eyebrows, and I realize I’m letting him get to me.

  “Well, it must be someone else,” I say.

  “Or you misread his intentions. Believe me, it always happens.”

  “It doesn’t happen with me.”

  He snorts and continues, “If you want an easy way out, we can pretend you’re my date. Everyone will see us getting there together.”

  He looks at me and I can tell he’s serious. It actually sounds tempting, not to be Adam’s date, but not having to re-explain everything to Kyle in an awkward conversation. But I can’t do that. I know better than anyone that feelings of disappointment are some of the most powerful in the human soul, and it wouldn’t be nice of me to inflict them on Kyle just because I’m afraid of embarrassment.

  “Nah, that’s okay,” I wave off his offer. “I’ll talk to Kyle and clear everything up. Besides, you’ll end up finding some pretty girl to flirt with and ditch your fake date. That would be bad for my reputation.”

  “Whatever you want,” Adam says and glances over at me. “But just so you know, I wouldn’t ditch you.”

  He turns his car into a long driveway. We come to a stop at large iron gate, guarded by two men.

  “Password, please,” one of them says.

  “Sidekick,” Adam answers. The gate opens and we drive in.

  Adam parks his car all the way in the back. “Just in case we leave earlier,” he explains, “I don’t want people blocking me in.”

  “That’s okay; I don’t mind walking. Besides, it’s nice to know we won’t be trapped.”

  “I hate feeling trapped.”

  I smile to myself. It must be the only thing we have in common. Adam walks down the gravel road and I follow him. As we reach the end of the driveway, a huge white house comes into view. It’s a one-story home but has large, glass windows that reflect the sun setting on the water; the backyard is the entire bay.

  We reach the front door and my heart pounds faster in my chest. I close my eyes and I imagine a rush of water falling over me. I’ll have to keep that sensation running constantly through my head if I want to maintain my sanity in there. From the loud noise coming from inside, this place must be packed. I suddenly wish we’re back in his car.

  “Are you okay?” Adam asks. I open my eyes to see him staring at me and holding the knob of the front door.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Just got lost in thought.” I try to smile.

  “Don’t worry,” he grins, “they won’t bite. If you want to leave, just say the word.”

  I nod and wonder if I should add “caring” to his traits.

  Adam pushes the door open. I can feel eyes on us; there’re tons of people in here, and through t
he windows I can see more outside. Anxiety makes my stomach hurt—I shouldn’t have come.

  “Adam! You finally made it.” A girl comes up to hug him. When I take a second look, I realize that she’s the girl I saw in the picture on his Facebook page. A big smile takes over his face and he embraces her. I find myself hoping that it’s nothing more than a friendship. I turn around before they see me staring.

  I figure I’d better go find Kyle and let him know I made it.

  “Livia!” The music is loud but I hear Adam calling me back. I pretend I didn’t notice and push my way into the crowd, the swarm of emotions lurking around me as I restrain the sensation of water from leaving my mind. Adam shouts my name again and I feel someone touching my shoulder. I turn around and there he is with that girl.

  “Hey, I want you to meet Brianna. She’s a good friend of mine.”

  “Hi,” I say absently, shaking her hand.

  Her face is bright and friendly. “Nice to finally meet you Livia; I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  “Really?” I ask, curious. I’ve only been here for two days. What could she possibly have heard?

  “I’m going to find Matt,” Adam says. Before I can protest, he is gone, leaving Brianna and me alone.

  “So, Adam told me your family bought Aphrodite. She is a really sweet horse.” She has to shout to talk over the music. “I think he was a little sad to see her go.”

  “I could tell he’s attached to her.”

  “We often go horseback riding together. You should come next time.”

  Brianna seems to be nice. Her excitement brings a spontaneous smile to my face. Maybe I should give her a chance—just because she might be Adam’s fling doesn’t mean she’s as unpleasant as he is.

  On that train of thought, I blurt out, “So, uh, are you and Adam…” before I trail off. She looks at me and her eyebrows go up.

  “What?” she laughs. “We’re just really good friends. I do have a boyfriend, though, and that’s Matt—the guy throwing the party.”