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Diana in Search of Herself

Page 54

by Sally Bedell Smith


  18 “she must try to be less emotional”: DT, 8/29/98

  19 “She was a very strong character”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  20 “I didn’t think you had it”: B-AM1, p. 27

  21 “I would have been involved”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  22 “buoyant and noisy”: B-AM1, p. 87

  23 “I was always looking for”: Ibid., p. 28

  24 “The compassion and caring”: Ruth Rudge, West Heath Magazine, p. 26

  25 “for anyone who has done things”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  26 “She had a very caring heart”: Interview with Violet Allen

  27 “Mostly it was a traumatic time”: Ibid.

  28 “Most of the girls from”: Ibid.

  29 “was always very controlled”: B-PJ1, p. 65

  30 “A terrible terrible wrench”: B-AM1, p. 28

  31 “a difficult phase”: Ti, 10/17/98

  32 “a chilling time warp”: Spencer, p. 2

  33 “never grew to be fond”: B-PJ1, p. 82

  34 a controversial image: Ibid.

  35 one of her cousins: SuMi, 5/18/80

  36 “When I met Johnnie”: DEx, 11/30/81

  37 By the time Johnnie brought Raine: B-AM1, pp. 91–92; B-PJ1, p. 82

  38 “In the beginning I was very”: Interview with Robert Spencer

  39 “used to … pour us”: B-AM1, p. 28

  40 Diana enlisted a friend: B-AM1, p. 92

  41 Diana’s mistrust of Raine hardened: ST, 10/17/98

  42 “resented”: DEx, 11/30/81

  43 “intense love affair”: WO, 4/8/78; B-AM1, pp. 90, 96

  44 “domestic upheavals concerning my family…. bring it up again”: WO,4/8/78

  45 “I sought a lot of medical help”: I-FSK

  46 “like something out of.… I wouldn’t admit it”: WO, 4/8/78

  47 Sarah later acknowledged: Ibid.

  48 “Bulimia” comes from the Greek: Handbook of Treatment for Eating Disorders, second edition (1997), edited by David M. Garner, Ph.D., and Paul E. Garfinkel, M.D., p. 13

  49 Although bulimia nervosa was not: Ibid., p. 11

  50 “inappropriate compensatory behaviors”: Ibid., p. 25

  51 “It started because Sarah”: Mi, 5/8/97

  52 “I don’t think I have”: I-FSK

  53 “She was often seen lurking”: Ruth Rudge, West Heath Magazine, p. 26

  54 “midnight feasts”: ITV-Doc

  55 “loved food”: B-PJ1, p. 72

  56 “I ate and ate”: B-AM1, p. 27

  57 She recalled sneaking: Ibid., p. 27

  58 As the movers were packing up: B-PJ1, p. 81

  59 From a very early age: Ibid., p. 50

  60 “was always washing or tidying”: Interview with Robert Spencer

  61 “I would go in sometimes”: Interview with Violet Allen

  62 “Diana had strong”: Interview with Kent Ravenscroft

  63 “just came out of the pen”: B-AM1, p. 88

  64 “always released tremendous”: Ibid., p. 28

  65 “I didn’t allow best friends”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  66 On one hand, she recalled liking: B-AM1, p. 28

  67 but she was easily distracted: Ibid., p. 26

  68 wrote a lot: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  69 “Any child from a broken home”: Ibid.

  70 “At the age of fourteen”: B-AM1, p. 24

  71 she “froze”: Ibid., p. 88

  72 “exams made her panic”: B-PJ1, p. 71

  73 “I never remember walking”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  74 “something special”: B-PT, p. 31

  75 “winding road”: B-AM1, p. 68

  76 “going somewhere different”: Ibid., p. 24

  77 to marry a prominent man: Ibid.

  78 “it was well known”: B-RK, p. 44

  79 “according to Diana”: B-PT, p. 32

  80 “never had her marked down”: WO, 4/9/88

  81 “something like one hundred twenty letters”: B-AM1, p. 30

  82 Violet Allen couldn’t help: Interview with Violet Allen

  83 “If Diana was in a safe and secure environment”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  CHAPTER 5

  1 couldn’t wait to go to London: B-AM1, p. 30

  2 “By the late seventies”: Interview with Robert Spencer

  3 But Diana felt overwhelmed: B-PJ1, p. 99

  4 “all the tendons”: B-AM1, p. 102

  5 injuring her leg “slightly”: B-PJ1, p. 100

  6 “She did not hang about”: Interview with Robert Spencer

  7 “velvet hairbands”: B-AM1, p. 31

  8 “When it came to children, [Diana] had”: ITV-Doc

  9 “Diana was pure state-of-the-art”: Newsweek, 10/26/85

  10 “the new school of born-again”: VF, 10/85

  11 “loner by inclination and habit”: B-AM1, p. 99

  12 “I kept myself to myself”: Ibid., p. 31

  13 “You always felt that”: Ibid., p. 105

  14 “Diana didn’t enjoy parties”: B-PJ1, p. 106

  15 “sexually attractive”: B-AM1, p. 105

  16 “Lady Diana’s life in London”: DT, 9/1/97; interviews with William Deedes, George Plumptre

  17 Diana explained that she: B-AM1, p. 28

  18 “I had never had a boyfriend”: Ibid., pp. 33–34

  19 “tuck into a good-sized”: B-PJ1, p. 99

  20 “got terribly fat”: B-AM1, p. 31

  21 Her friend Rory Scott vividly remembered: Ibid., p. 127

  22 “Do you have anorexia? … just common sense”: WO, 4/8/78

  23 “Bulimia ranges from fad”: Interview with Kent Ravenscroft

  24 “touching side to this friendship”: DEx, 7/18/77

  25 “He makes me laugh”: Sun, 11/8/77

  26 “I never thought there was”: B-SB, p. 182

  27 “His closest friends began to”: B-JD, p. 315

  28 “When she was twelve”: Time, 9/8/97

  29 “After the investiture”: Interview with Ruth Rudge

  30 “His first impression”: B-JD, p. 337

  31 “The first impact was ‘God, what a sad man.’… He was charm itself”: B-AM1, p.31

  32 “were seen walking around the corridors”: DEx, 1/17/78

  33 several weekends later: DM, 2/2/78

  34 “show [her] grandchildren one day”: Interview with James Whitaker

  35 “a romantic who falls in love”: Sun, 2/18/78

  36 “I’m not in love with Prince Charles”: DM, 2/18/78

  37 “This is the first time”: DM, 2/18/78

  38 “What a girl!”: NOTW, 2/19/78

  39 one of his six pseudonyms: B-DK, p. 88

  40 “panicky perspiring figure”: DEx, (“William Hickey” column, written by Peter McKay), 4/5/78

  41 “thousands of boyfriends”: WO, 4/8/78

  42 “You’ve just done something”: Interview with James Whitaker

  43 “by foul means”: DM, 4/4/78

  44 “My sister Sarah spoke to the press”: B-MR, p. 40

  45 “I know who you are”: Interview with James Whitaker

  CHAPTER 6

  1 “He was a complete bachelor”: Interview with Michael Colborne

  2 “I’ve fallen in love with”: B-DK, p. 213

  3 By pushing himself to the limit: B-JD, p. 184

  4 As a young boy: Biographical material on Prince Charles was drawn primarily from The Prince of Wales, the authorized biography by Jonathan Dimbleby, which is the most reliable source.

  5 “deep if inarticulate love”: B-JD, p. 59

  6 “she was not indifferent”: Ibid.

  7 “the most intimate of the Prince’s”: Ibid., p. 19

  8 “I simply dread going to bed”: Ibid., p. 76 (PC letter 2/9/63 to unnamed recipient)

  9 “I’m not a gregarious person”: Ibid., p. 44

  10 “sensitive musician”: Ibid., p. 88

  11 “surrogate elder brother”: Ibid., p. 10
2

  12 “to find himself”: Ibid., p. 107

  13 “sow his wild oats”: Ibid., p. 220

  14 “just the girl”: Ibid.

  15 “with a searching look”: PE, “Grovel” column, 7/3/81

  16 “dashed [emphatically] accurate”: Interview with Nigel Dempster

  17 “With all the intensity of first love”: B-JD, p. 221

  18 “live inside [her] trousers”: SuMi, 1/17/93

  19 Parker Bowles was a ladies’ man: B-PJ2, pp. 47–49

  20 By mid-1972 Charles and Camilla had struck: B-JD, p. 232 (PC letter 4/27/73 to unnamed recipient)

  21 In Camilla’s company, Charles became: Ibid., p. 222

  22 “the last time I shall see her”: Ibid. (PC letter 12/72 to Mountbatten)

  23 “such a blissful, peaceful”: Ibid., p. 232 (PC letter 4/27/73 to unnamed recipient)

  24 “I must say, Amanda really”: Ibid., p. 230 (PC letter 4/25/73 to Mountbatten)

  25 “Perhaps being away”: Ibid., pp. 248–49 (PC letter 3/74 to Mountbatten)

  26 “Our editor said … ‘We want”: R&R-Doc, Part I, p. 21

  27 “You’ve got to remember”: BBC/ITV interview with Brian Connell,6/26/69

  28 “His bride needed to have”: Harper’s & Queen, 4/90

  29 “choose a suitable”: B-JD, p. 248 (Mountbatten letter 2/74 to PC)

  30 “A woman not only marries a man”: The Observer, 6/9/74

  31 “My marriage has to be forever”: ES, 1/7/75

  32 “a secure family unit”: WO, 2/75

  33 “You must get married at once”: Colin Clark, Younger Brother, Younger Son: A Memoir (1997), p. 154

  34 “beginning on the downward slope”: B-JD, p. 316 (Mountbatten letter undated, 1978, to PC)

  35 “I must say I am becoming”: Ibid., pp. 317–18 (PC letter 4/15/79 to unnamed recipient)

  36 Clearly he admired and respected her: Ibid., p. 249

  37 She grasped all too well: Ibid., p. 322

  38 Charles had recently renewed: B-JD, p. 335; B-RK, p. 91; B-PJ2, pp.48–49

  39 “warmth, her lack of ambition”: B-JD, p. 335

  40 when Andrew left that year: DM, 1/14/93; PE, 1/4/80

  41 “began to suppose that they”: B-JD, p. 335

  42 Yet the Queen, in her customary: DT, 10/20/98

  43 “The surgeons didn’t want to operate”: WO, 4/9/88

  44 “I was the first person”: Ibid.

  45 They felt that Raine kept them: B-AM1, p. 29

  46 Detecting signals that Diana hadn’t “twigged … amazing place”: Ibid., p. 32

  47 “that weekend was the beginning”: B-PJ1, p. 97

  48 “They were shooting pheasants”: Interview with James Whitaker

  49 “Charles probably didn’t see”: B-PJ1, p. 97

  50 “Charles found himself strangely”: Ibid., pp. 113–14

  51 “quite a lot”: Ibid.

  52 “He would ring up Cadogan”: Ibid., p. 97

  53 “no one ever took much notice”: Ibid., p. 103

  54 “She could have been amongst”: Interview with Michael Colborne

  55 “disorganized about arrangements”: B-SB, p. 111

  56 After her customary visit: B-PJ1, pp. 101, 116

  57 “I have lost someone infinitely special”: B-JD, p. 324

  58 The daughter of a millionaire: B-PJ1, p. 117

  59 “caviar queen”: Sunday Times Magazine, 12/22/85

  60 “Whiplash Wallace”: Mi, 8/22/80

  61 “There is a risqué picture”: DM, 6/10/80

  62 “enormously attracted”: B-SB, p. 171

  63 In February 1980, she traveled: B-PJ1, p. 117

  64 “Can you see me swanning”: B-AM1, p. 105

  65 “perfect English skin”: B-MR, p. 15

  66 “casual encounters”: B-JD, p. 337

  67 “began to think seriously”: Ibid., p. 338

  68 “You’re a young blood”: B-AM1, p. 32

  69 tabloid veteran James Whitaker: Interview with James Whitaker

  70 “He was all over me”: B-AM1, p. 32

  71 “how she had sensed his loneliness”: B-JD, p. 337

  72 “It was to Lady Susan”: B-SB, p. 184

  73 “he had met the girl he intended to marry”: B-JD, p. 337

  74 “as soft, cheerful and bouncy”: B-PJ1, p. 119

  75 “the impression to the Prince’s family”: B-JD, p. 338

  76 “The summer of 1980 was all”: Interview with Robert Spencer

  77 She was disconcerted by his older friends: B-AM1, p. 32

  78 “Lady Diana’s presence struck me”: B-SB, pp. 189–90

  79 “I was terrified—shitting bricks”: B-AM1, p. 32

  80 “all right once I got in”: Ibid., p. 33

  81 “She was a sort of wonderful”: B-JD, p. 339

  82 “always buying him little presents”: B-SB, p. 194

  83 “instinctive understanding”: Ibid., p. 232

  84 “confided to one of his friends”: B-JD, p. 339

  85 “the virgin, the sacrificial”: B-AM1, p. 38

  86 “the sacrificial virgin bride”: ST, 9/23/90

  87 “not a position”: The Madness of George III, Alan Bennett (1991)

  88 “a man as good and honest”: TNY, 9/15/97

  89 “He often used to say”: DM, 10/20/98

  90 “resented it terribly”: Interview with Elsa Bowker

  91 “I don’t even dare”: B-MR, p. 40

  92 Just weeks before: DEx, 2/7/80; DM, 4/2/80

  93 “I had so many dreams”: B-AM2, p. 155

  94 she felt secure for the first time: B-PJ1, p. 134

  95 “never dominated”: B-SB, p. 177

  96 “with great cunning”: B-PJ2, p. 58

  97 “oiling up, basically”: B-AM1, p. 40

  98 “When you fall in love”: Interview with Michael Colborne

  99 “[she] realized [she] had taken on”: B-AM1, p. 42

  100 “based on her romantic image”: B-MR, p. 42

  101 “Oh! This is the life”: B-JD, p. 338

  CHAPTER 7

  1 “a perfect English rose”: Sun, 9/8/80

  2 “ ‘What a cunning lady’ ”: DS, 6/29/81

  3 “They exaggerated it”: Interview with James Whitaker

  4 “there was certainly no obvious”: B-SB, p. 191

  5 “Because we had a foreign”: Interview with Andrew Neil

  6 The most important beneficiary: S. J. Taylor, Shock! Horror! The Tabloids in Action (1992), pp. 217, 343

  7 “Kelvin is a natural”: Interview with Andrew Neil

  8 “Kelvin would adopt at a”: R&R-Doc, Part II, p. 7

  9 “I understand all your problems”: SuMi, 9/21/80

  10 “had a way … of taking scalps”: Taylor, p. 152

  11 “fitted perfectly”: B-JW, p. 150

  12 “James and Harry … were like”: Interview with Andrew Morton

  13 “People talk about me as if”: You, 8/22/93

  14 After graduating: Ibid.; Interview with James Whitaker

  15 “master of trivia”: B-DK, p. 88

  16 “absolutely scarlet”: Interview with James Whitaker

  17 “His face was beet-red”: Interview with Peter McKay

  18 “Whitaker both proclaimed”: Ibid.

  19 “I know binoculars are”: Interview with James Whitaker

  20 “several intimate chats”: B-JW, pp. 155, 160

  21 “resemblance to a London”: B-DK, p. 61

  22 Andrew Morton grew up: Interview with Andrew Morton

  23 “Her blue eyes gaze straight”: DS, 6/30/83

  24 “to think they were friends”: ES, 10/9/93

  25 “If they do a feature”: Independent on Sunday, 9/17/95

  26 “the Pompadoured Poltroon.… The Tonsured Traducer”: ES, 12/3/91

  27 “old established”: The Independent, 3/2/96

  28 “[They] knew no one”: Interview with Nigel Dempster

  29 “new choice of girlfri
end”: DM, 9/18/80

  30 “back in each other’s”: DS, 11/5/80

  31 “romantic underwear expert”: Mi, 1/19/81

  32 “If I go to a restaurant”: DM, 11/24/80

  33 “very depressed”: B-SB, p. 197

  34 “safe house”: Ibid., p. 178

  35 “encouraged the romance”: Ibid., p. 185

  36 “It’s almost as if the Parker Bowleses”: DS, 11/12/80

  37 “from the moment of [Charles’s] engagement”: B-JD, pp. 346–47

  38 had stopped when Charles started: B-PJ2, p. 71

  39 “The pressures on the prince”: B-JD, p. 339

  40 “She was most certainly in love”: B-SB, p. 197

  41 Barry sensed her disappointment: Ibid., p. 192

  42 Somewhat primly, she was: B-AM1, p. 39

  43 “quietly captivating”: Mi, 11/19/80

  44 “rely on instinct”: DS, 11/13/80

  45 “reputation as a demon driver”: DS, 11/11/80

  46 “an 80-mph car caper”: Time, 2/28/83

  47 “erratic driving record”: DS, 11/13/80

  48 “the friendship which Charles and Diana”: Sun, 11/10/80

  49 “has been groomed”: Ibid.

  50 “choice of bride”: ST, 9/23/90

  51 the two women chipped: B-JD, p. 340

  52 “Both grandmothers know”: ES, 11/13/80

  53 “If I’d said to [Charles]”: B-JD, p. 340

  54 “sense of humor” and “lifestyle” were “different”: B-AM1, p. 36

  55 “never sent flowers”: B-JW, p. 153

  56 the delivery of two dozen: DM, 11/24/80

  57 “I often felt sorry for her”: DS, 6/30/81

  58 Yet Charles’s valet: B-SB, p. 192

  59 “dawn dash”: Ibid., p. 199

  60 “a bit of a nuisance”: DS, 11/12/80

  61 Judy Wade of The Sun: Sun, 1/5/81

  62 “or the whole country would”: Interview with James Whitaker

  63 “The time has come when Prince Charles”: DS, 10/10/80

  64 “remarkably cool and mature”: Mi, 11/19/80

  65 “put on the most”: B-AM1, p. 61

  66 “unbearable … I cried like a baby”: B-AM1, p. 35

  67 “I’m not so much bored”: DM, 11/24/80

  68 “everything she [could] lay her hands”: B-SB, p. 110

  69 “It seems that … Lady Diana”: Mi, 1/19/81

  70 In December 1980: DM, 12/3/80

  71 She remembered that he seemed only: B-AM1, p. 35

  72 “more concerned”: B-SB, p. 191

  73 “sensationalism”: B-DK, p. 50

  74 “I should like to take this”: B-PJ1, p. 131

 

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