The Fake Mind (Time Alchemist)

by Allice Revelle

  And finally, for the first time in my life, I felt like I had finally done something right. Everything was truly going to be okay.

  I just knew it.

  CHAPTER 22

  The Black Crown did well this time; they came roughly fifteen minutes after I killed Ivan for good. Well, I’m sure it was painfully obvious back at home that we ran away, but I had never been so relieved to see them.

  Of course, we were both (namely me) in a huge, huge mess of trouble.

  But after fighting and beating an ancient alchemist for good, I couldn’t have cared less what kind of punishment awaited me back at headquarters. I could take on anything!

  I really could.

  And that’s what I believed.

  Rick and I were both interrogated heavily after our injuries were healed.

  Instead of going back to Frankie Ann’s house, we were ushered to headquarters, where Leon was given proper medical treatment by Julio and Gwen, the Healers. Although I had explained to Christopher about Ivan Novak, he did, at first, seem impressed with my feat, but was still angry that I had went in alone without back up.

  “We were scared out of our minds, Miller,” Christopher had said.

  But even then, a small part of me didn’t buy that.

  “Then why don’t I believe you?” I had finally asked, tired of the day. “Ever since we first met you’ve gone to great lengths to keep me under your thumb. True, you guys have really saved my life more times than I could count, but I don’t like being some subject! I’m an alchemist, and sometimes things have to be done, even if you don’t like them.”

  He let out a sigh, brushing a hand through his hair. “Perhaps our methods weren’t that good.” After a look, he let out another sigh. “Okay, they weren’t good at all. Then I apologize for how we have been treating you. But I won’t apologize for worrying.”

  I smiled. “Good. I don’t want you to. I do like this place, I really do. Everyone here is nice, even if I don’t really like your methods. I feel like I’ve gotten a better grasp of being an alchemist.”

  Christopher finally relented his “hold” on me, and promised that he would not resort to any other tricks to “protect” me. Including hypnotizing my dad and my school about my “real life”. But in turn, I did apologize, too. They had given me a lot of things this past month and three times I had threatened it to go off on my wild hunts. I asked them if they would give me another chance, to train me until the start of the new semester, and Christopher gladly agreed—but it would be under his supervision.

  Yay.

  I also made them swear not to do anything to Rick—he followed me without my consent, but saved my life. Christopher claimed he would not do anything to Rick, though he is still under probation.

  Instead, after our “runaway”, we had to move our things to headquarters where they could keep a better eye on us until September. I was fine with that, even more so that I could see Leon.

  A slow week passed, and my body still felt as if it had been hit by a truck every morning. Maybe it was the practice or maybe the sting of adrenaline from Ivan’s fight, but I could never feel properly rested. I rose early on a Sunday morning, the only day off, and got dress and brushed my teeth as quickly as I could. The best part of having such short hair is that I didn’t need to worry too much about styling it; all I needed to do was run a hand through it, and it looked fine.

  Maybe I had Rick to thank for that, but I’d never admit it to his face.

  I waved good morning to a couple of scientists, or other members of the BC and headed down to the medical wing. It was just one hall with a few rooms, mainly used as a resting area. I found Leon’s room—the very last one—and peered inside, not at all surprised to see Dove there, sitting on a chair next to his bed and reading a book out loud to him.

  I knocked gently and Dove looked up, getting to her feet and

  enveloping me in a hug. After we all returned from St. Mary’s, and when Dove caught wind of where I was, she had Frankie Ann drive her over to visit.

  The look on Dove’s face was terrifying. She looked as if she were going to stab me herself. But all she did was shake her head, wrap me in a bone crushing hug, and say, “If you ever pull something like that again I will kill you, then bring you back to life and kill you again!”

  And when Dove says she will do something, you can bet she will stick to her. It may have sounded like a soft threat to most, but I knew it was her way of caring.

  A couple of times Chrys, Ru, and Oliver would come visit and I would tell them the story of what happened. Of course, they all looked equally scary, but I was more relieved to see Chrys up and about instead of worrying about her mad at me.

  “How’s he doing?” I asked like I did every morning. I followed Dove over and pulled up a chair, feeling my heart tug at Leon’s state.

  Just because the Healers used alchemy to heal his external wounds, he still had to be plugged up with a dripping IV and attached to a heart monitor. Right now, it was calm, but there were moments it would beep frantically, and Leon would twist in his sheets and give out blood curdling screams until Julio would come to calm him down. Twice they had to put him on sedatives.

  Leon wore pants underneath the sheets, but I requested if they could leave him shirtless, or give him a tank top. I had to keep checking for myself if Ivan’s dark Rune would pop back up, but so far his skin has been smooth and free of that poisonous ink.

  His mind, however…

  I clutched the pouch around my neck, feeling the only two shards left. “Do you think…?”

  Dove shook her head, then ran a cool cloth over Leon’s sweaty forehead. Motherly and sweet as always. She hadn’t left Leon’s side even once, and the Black Crown had treated her almost like a princess, even extended the rules to let her rest in the same room. She only took breaks when I was around only, going for a shower or a meal or even a short nap. Her eyes looked as hollowed out as Leon’s.

  “I don’t think he would want you to waste the Elixir on him again,” she murmured. Dove knew what I had done to save him, using the Elixir to force Ivan’s soul out, and another piece to heal the wound.

  “And this is more…psychological, I think. Leon is in a coma, but I don’t think he wants to wake up.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because of all the things he’s done.”

  “But you know it wasn’t his fault!” I protested. “He—”

  Dove just bit her lip. “Of course I know that, and I’m sure a small

  part of Leon knows that too. But he’s so distraught over his actions—his weakness—that maybe he just doesn’t want to wake up. He’s stuck in a never ending nightmare, one he thinks he deserves.”

  I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from crying. The few times I came face-to-face with Leon, he was in such distress. He claimed that there were endless days of darkness. What sort of things had Ivan made him do? Was he trying to suppress them by staying comatose?

  Leon feels so guilty over the things he had no control over. Is he really choosing this life willingly? To protect us? To protect himself?

  Did I save him for nothing? Would Leon have been able to find peace if I had granted his last wish and killed him?

  CHAPTER 23

  I stepped out of the room, refusing to look back. Dove didn’t try to stop me; it was as if she could sense my distress. And then I felt ten times worse. If anyone had the right to be upset over Leon’s…condition…it was her! That was her brother!

  I took a walk, blindly heading…who knew where. I just needed to get away, to be alone, but then I bumped into someone hard and almost fell backward when I felt a hand grip my arm tightly, pulling me back up.

  “You okay?”

  It was Rick. Oh. I must have walked to the other side of the building, where he was staying. His brown eyes were warm, looking concerned. I managed a weak smile and shook my head. “I’m fine.”

  “Yeah, and I’m the King of Sweden,” he retorted. Surprisingly, Rick put
an arm around my shoulders, squeezing gently. I saw his wrists bandaged thickly from when he had tried to claw those metal bands off.

  Rick had gone through so much to help me. Everyone has. So I should be happy to even get this far. But why was my chest hurting so much? Like an ice pick stabbing into my heart relentlessly?

  “I’m sorry,” I finally said.

  “For what?”

  “You, doing all of this for me, going through all of this pain—”

  “Chicks dig that kinda thing,” Rick retorted with a smirk. “And didn’t I already tell you that I wanted to stick with you? This place isn’t so bad—a little stuffy, but it’s…different.”

  “How?”

  “It’s a little…warmer,” a light blush lit on his cheeks. “White was my family, once, but it never felt this…close. Maybe I can really start over, wipe my slate clean.”

  I smiled, feeling the stabbing pain dull just a little at Rick’s cuteness. “I think that’s a good idea.”

  Wipe the slate clean, huh?

  An idea popped up so suddenly I expected a light bulb to be hovering over my head. But it was squished by another dark thought: Should I?

  No…it’s wrong. A violation.

  But my mind flashed back to Dove’s hunched form, crying over her brother…Leon lying in my arms, weak, but happy to just be out of that external nightmare. Now he was fighting his own demons, and I had to help him. I had to.

  “I’ve seen that look before,” Rick said, “What are you planning,

  Clockie?”

  “Nothing,” I said. “But I gotta go. I need to find someone.” I brushed off his worry with a wave and ran off, hoping that maybe a certain Alchemist was coming in today.

  Another week passed, and before I even realized it, it was my birthday.

  July 12th. I was turning seventeen today.

  And it was the day that Leon finally woke up. I heard it just from the chatter outside the hallways as I forced myself up. I had slept unusually late—it was almost noon—and when I heard the news I almost barreled into one of the cleaning crew. I tried to keep cool, pacing myself, even catching tidbits of conversation.

  “Did you hear? King’s son is finally—”

  “I didn’t even know he had a son!”

  “But his daughter claims it, so…”

  “Is that why those two are getting such special treatment?”

  King? I remembered, vaguely, of some of the hooded members claiming something about “King’s daughter” back at the Sun and Moon Library. Could that be the name of her father?

  I finally got to the room, surprised to see the usual group lingering out in the hall. Their happiness was infectious; Chrys, Ru, and Oliver all cared about Dove, even for the short time they had known her.

  If she was happy, they were.

  Chrys was the first to spot me, running towards me with a wide grin on her face, and a twinkling in her eye. Though her skin still looked a little pale; I wondered if she forced herself up for this. I hugged her tightly, muttering something in her ear. She just shook her head and placed a finger to her lip.

  Afterwards, Oliver gave me a half hug, grinning from ear to ear, and even Ru seemed a little happy, with the edge of his lips twitched up into a smirk of sorts.

  “Do you think I should go in?” I asked, peeking through the door a little as I saw Dove hugging her brother gently from the bed.

  Before anyone answered, I felt a couple pairs of hands on my back, shoving me in with such force I let out a squeak. I turned to give them a glare but they had all vanished, leaving me alone with Dove and Leon.

  My heart soared into the clouds. Leon was sitting upright, a couple of pillows tucked behind him as leverage. The color of his skin had returned, giving him a flushed glow, and even though his limbs looked frail and weak, he returned his sister’s hug with much force.

  Neither of them had noticed me yet, so I backed up to the wall, holding myself with trembling hands.

  “What happened?” Leon’s voice was harsh, like sandpaper coated

  his throat. Dove reached for a glass of water and Leon chugged it grateful, spilling a little down his chin.

  “You don’t remember?” Dove asked gently. “You went through a perilous journey, Leon. You’re very lucky to be alive…”

  “Where…are we?”

  “At the Black Crown. They’ve been kind enough to take us in until you’ve healed.”

  “Where’s Master?” Leon croaked out. “Where is she?”

  Dove shushed him softly, pushing him back against the pillows.

  “You must still be dreaming, Leon.”

  “No, no…I remember,” Leon coughed out. “We were…Sun and Moon…and that man…”

  Dove blinked, and I felt a ball of coldness settle into my stomach.

  “That was over a year ago, Leon. Don’t you remember what happened to Guinevere?”

  Leon was quiet for a long time, staring up into the ceiling until his eyes drifted down…down…to me. They widened, and even from my spot I could almost see the flecks of brown and silver, like dust, inside of his sea green foamy eyes.

  Dove caught his look and turned around, brightening visibly when she saw me. “Emery! Come see, Leon’s awake! He’s finally awake!” she waved me over and it was all I could do not to flee like a rabbit. Dove

  turned back to Leon, holding his hand between her own, and smiled.

  “Leon, it’s all thanks to Emery that you’re safe. You wouldn’t even begin to believe what she’s done.”

  Leon was quiet, opening and closing his mouth like a drowned fish. His eyes glazed over when he met mine, and he spoke so quietly I barely caught his words. “I-I’m sorry but…who are you?”

  Dove visibly flinched, shooting a quizzical look at me then at Leon. “She’s Emery, Leon. Are you okay?”

  “Emery…who?”

  “Emery Miller, who else would she be?” Dove’s voice went cold.

  “I…don’t know anyone by that name,” Leon shook his head, then winced, clenching his jaw so tightly I heard his teeth shift and grind.

  “Leon! Emery is the one who saved your life!” Dove continued, blinking away tears. “Don’t you remember? She’s the person you lo—”

  “I’m sorry…I…don’t,” Leon hissed. “I just can’t…remember. Is she…another of Master’s students, too?”

  Speechless, Dove turned to me, her bright ice blue eyes shining with unshed tears. She opened her mouth, but no words could come out.

  So I gripped my arms tighter, so tightly that I felt my nails dig into my skin, and shrugged. “Maybe he’s suffering from some sort of memory trauma.”

  I couldn’t meet her eyes, and that’s when I knew she could tell.

  Coldly, she repeated. “Memory trauma.”

  “Yeah it…happens.”

  “Of course.” She turned around, refusing to look at me. “Memory trauma.”

  She made no move, sitting there rigid as a statue. Leon’s eyes had closed again, but now he was in a peaceful sleep, his chest rising and falling slowly. I squeezed the tears away. I had no right to cry.

  Not after what I did.

  CHAPTER 24

  “What did you do?”

  Dove had corned me the second we had stepped out. I folded my arms to my chest, looking down at the scuff marks on my shoes. Finally, she grabbed my shoulders, forcing me to look at her, and whispered,

  “What the hell did you do?!”

  I had never seen such fury come from Dove. Dove, the gentlest girl I had ever met. But also one of the weakest. And now this anger was rolling off her in waves, and I knew I would never be able to hide the truth from her. And I shouldn’t.

  So I told her.

  I begged Chrys for her help, one more time. Last week, I had managed to find her just as she arrived for her morning training. Chrys was a wise one; she could sense my distress and she let me take her to my room. I told her flat out what my plan was, and even she seemed floored by it.

&nb
sp; “You want me to erase Leon’s memories?” Chrys had gasped, a hand to her mouth.

  I nodded. “I think it’s the only way to really free him, Chrys.

  You’ve seen him; he’s so guilt ridden that he’ll never wake up! He’s being plagued by nightmares, and for the rest of his life—if he wakes up

  —he’ll be haunted by Ivan’s doings. I can’t let this happen to him, Chrys.” I choked out a sob. “I—I love him. I love him so much that it hurts, but it hurts worse to see him suffer.”

  Gently, Chrys had put a hand on my arm, leaning against my shoulder. It was hard to believe we were the same age—she was just like Dove. Calm, mature, wise. I couldn’t hold a candle to her. But at the same time, I was asking for so much.

  I fished for my pouch and pressed it into her hand. “It’s not much, but I want you to have this. As…compensation. If you help me. Please.”

  Chrys opened the pouch and dumped the last two remaining shards into her palm. The twinkled like blood coated stars, and she stared at me with a wide look.

  “After what happened last time…”

  “I’ll do it,” Chrys had spoken up. “Of course I will.”

  “But…” I bit my lip, hesitant. “Are you sure, Chrys? After everything that I’ve made you do—”

  She held up a hand. “Emery, you didn’t make me do a ny of those things. I wanted to do it. I wanted to help. And yes, it uses up a lot of my energy, but I believe that I truly am getting better…stronger. So I’m

  going to do this because you’re my friend.

  I wanted to cry, but instead I wrapped my arms around her, wondering what I did to deserve this friendship. All I did was take, take, take, and now…

  Chrys pushed one of the shards back into my pouch and handed it to me. “You worked hard to get these, Emery. And I know that you still need one, so I’m only going to take one as payment, alright? Next time, though, my price is going to be a little higher!” She gave me a wink, and we both laughed.

  Chrys went to work that very night, wanting to sleep over in my room to have better access. She refuses to let me come, so I stayed up the entire night, watching her struggle in her sleep. But it took hardly an hour, and Chrys woke up once, bleary eyed, and fell back to sleep after she mumbled “It’s done…”