Book 4: 3rd World Products, Inc.

by Ed Howdershelt

  Sue maneuvered the flitter under him and he, too, turned off his glider. Kent was flushed and trembling with excitement as we descended toward his uncle's yard.

  "Glad you had fun,” I said, picking up my coffee mug. “I'm leaving all those people to you, Kent. We have places to go and stuff to do today, so we'll get with you later to make whatever arrangements are needed."

  When I gestured toward Steph he looked that direction and I whispered, “Three suit on,” and vanished. I walked to the rear of the deck and whispered 'glider on,' then stepped off and slid through the air toward my front yard, where I landed and watched the others for a moment.

  Kent hopped off the flitter with a wave and a smile, then the flitter zoomed back into the sky. I walked around the house, let myself in the side garage door, headed for the kitchen, and ignored the flashing LED on my answering machine.

  Steph and Sue were already at the kitchen table and Tiger was sitting on the table to allow both of them easy access. He looked at my coffee mug floating toward him and said something.

  Sue said, “Tiger would like to know why you're not visible, Ed."

  I laughed as I patted him and said, “Because someone might see me, Tiger. I'm about to refill my coffee cup, and that means standing in front of the window. Someone might come over to talk and I'd rather get my coffee made and go see Selena and Toni. Do you want to come along?"

  Tiger listened with a cocked ear as Sue relayed my answer, then he spoke again in a tone I knew to be affirmative, translated unnecessarily by Sue as “Yes."

  As I dumped what looked to be about enough instant coffee into my cup, I asked, “Steph, does it seem highly coincidental that an Army colonel who is about to retire and happens to be related to friends of mine showed up here this weekend?"

  Steph's attention seemed to remain fixed on stroking Tiger as she said, “Col. Meyer received his orders last Friday, Ed. His visit here is listed as a 'delay en route for personal reasons'."

  "Where are his parents? What state?"

  "They live in Pennsylvania. Kent took leave to visit them during Christmas."

  "Hm. The Army usually allows a month or more for peacetime transfers, Steph. What emergency circumstances required him to change duty stations on a week's notice or required the Army to fill a slot at Ft. Bragg that quickly?"

  "No such circumstances are apparent, Ed."

  Noting that the small crowd across the street had mostly dissipated as I capped my mug, I said, “I didn't think they would be."

  I turned from the sink, sipped my coffee, looked at Steph, and said, “Assume that this is a setup; that he'll retire and sign on with you and even that he'll perform for you as well as he would for any other employer. Also assume that he'll be reporting to someone."

  Steph smiled. “I'd planned to proceed along those lines, Ed."

  Sue looked at Steph and asked, “You're going to hire him?"

  "Someone once told me that well-known demons can be safer company than unknown angels."

  Looking at me, Sue said, “I can guess who that might have been."

  I picked up the phone and called Selena's number.

  She answered on the fourth ring with, “Ed, we expected you to be here by now."

  "The blessings of caller ID ... Hello to you, too, lady. I'm calling to tell you we're about to hit the road. Wanted to make sure you hadn't gone shopping or something."

  "As if,” she said. “Get yourselves moving and your excuse better be good."

  "Oh, by your command, milady. I'm bringing Tiger, too. See you in a few. Bye."

  "Okay-bye. And hurry.” She hung up.

  Grabbing my travel kit, I said, “Ready when you are, ladies.” Speaking to the room, I asked, “Elkor?"

  Elkor's disembodied voice said, “Yes, Ed."

  "Are you coming with us to Inverness?"

  As he said “Yes,” Tiger's platform floated into the kitchen. Tiger hopped onto it and spoke and Elkor's disembodied voice returned the catty greeting. I opened the front door and started to hold it for the ladies, but they'd already vanished from the kitchen.

  Susanne and Steph were seated aboard the flitter when it landed. Tiger, Elkor, and I quickly boarded and the flitter lifted skyward swiftly. A couple of kids who'd been watching our prior air show had lingered at the corner to talk. One of them saw us and dropped his skateboard to point at us as he yelled at the other kid to look.

  A few minutes later we descended toward Selena's condo. Selena and Toni lay by the small swimming pool in lounge chairs. Toni pointed up at us and swatted Selena with her towel. Selena waved her drink at us, then let Toni pull her to her feet.

  The condo's back yard was too small for a landing, so Sue hovered above the fence and I dropped down to the lawn as Tiger descended on his platform beside me. I set my travel kit down to hug Selena and Toni. Tiger hopped off Elkor's platform to roll in the grass by their feet and they each took a moment to pat him and say ‘hi'.

  Sue and Steph appeared and Selena's and Toni's eyes widened considerably as they got their first ‘in person’ looks at Sue. After introductions and greetings there was an awkward moment, then Selena got us moving toward the condo.

  "Toni and I are cooking out here,” she said, “Let's get inside, out of the sun,” and as she turned to lead the way she shot me an amazed sort of look and whispered, “My God, she's beautiful, Ed!"

  "Gee, you think so?” I whispered back, eyeing Sel's bikini-clad body, “Gee, lady, I dunno ... Compared to you, she seems kind of average to me..."

  Sel's raised eyebrow and ‘you can put that back in the bull’ glance spoke her opinion of my comment. Tiger realized that he'd ceased to be the center of anyone's attention and got up to follow us to the screen door.

  Steph studied the pool deck, then looked at Sel and Toni and asked, “Would you and Toni be more comfortable if Sue and I were also dressed as if for swimming?"

  The catch in Toni's breath was audible and I knew that—like me—she and Sel were vividly remembering the last time we'd seen Steph in a bathing suit.

  Sel glanced at Toni before saying, “Whatever would make you comfortable, Steph."

  Field-generated clothing transmogrified into bathing suits; Steph's was, as expected, an emerald-green bikini and Sue wore a white one that offered a rather stark contrast to her carefully-computed bronze tan.

  Toni breathed, “Oh, wowww...!” and settled into a chair near the big plastic table by the pool, unable to take her eyes off Steph and Sue. Selena let her breath out in a long, soft sigh as her gaze ranged first over Steph from head to toe, then Sue.

  After a long look at all of the women present, I went to the kitchen for drinks as Selena grinningly sat down beside Toni, leaned across the table, and said, “So, Susanne, tell us all about you..."

  Tiger followed me to the kitchen and wove back and forth between my feet as I opened the fridge. I took a moment to put down a bit of milk in a small bowl for him, changed into a bathing suit in the living room, then grabbed a Dr Pepper and two diet Pepsis and headed back to the pool deck.

  As I set the Pepsis down Sue was saying, “...So here I am, a flitter pilot for at least a year."

  She glanced at me and I felt as if she'd maybe truncated another line of thought. Sel and Toni trying to stifle giggles reinforced that feeling.

  I looked at Steph, but she simply looked at me as if wondering why I was looking at her. Sue gave me a similarly innocent look.

  Uh, huh ... So it was a conspiracy.

  Oh, well; almost nothing will create bonds among people quicker than sharing secrets.

  Guzzling some Dr Pepper, I made my way to the pool and sat on the steps. I felt eyes on me and turned to see everyone staring at me. More games. Okay. I stood up and whispered ‘five suit on’ just before I entered the water.

  When I ducked under I was below their line of sight into the pool. The five suit kept the water about half an inch from my face and I was able to mutter ‘three suit on'.

  It wasn'
t a matter of holding my breath; reserve oxygen in the field sphere that hung near my briefcase circulated as necessary as I sat on the bottom of the pool.

  Perhaps a minute went by before I heard a chair slide back on the rough concrete above, then a face—Toni's, by her dark hair—appeared almost directly above me. I wondered if she'd noticed where the thin umbilical link from the field sphere above me entered the water.

  Apparently not. Sel's face soon appeared near Toni's. They looked around in some consternation for a few moments, then Selena seemed to have a revelation and she shoved Toni into the pool, then followed her in. Sel spread her arms, then Toni did the same and they began a methodical, groping search of the pool.

  I followed them around for a little while, then it apparently occurred to Sel that I might be behind them. She turned abruptly and backtracked, very nearly making contact with me as I shoved off the pool wall and scooted out of her path.

  When Toni moved to follow her, the time seemed right, so I formed two field tendrils that reached for their legs. Both women shrieked and thrashed, then seemed to become more determined than ever to locate me.

  They began again their methodical sweep of the pool as I headed for the shallow end and eased myself up the steps and out of the water. Since the water didn't stick to my five suit field, there was almost no disturbance of the surface as I lifted my legs and feet clear.

  Some minutes later, the ladies were rather frustrated as they turned to ask Steph and Sue for assistance in locating me. I froze, but though Selena couldn't see me, she noticed that my Dr Pepper bottle was suspended above the table.

  Screaming their ‘gonna get you's', the ladies stormed out of the water and converged on the poolside table. By that time I'd moved to the condo doorway, so their frantic groping around the table yielded them only empty chairs.

  With some minor swearing first Selena, then Toni, sat down and sipped their Pepsis, then toweled their hair. I said ‘three suit off’ and their eyes found me in the doorway.

  "That's cheating,” Toni said in a flat tone.

  "Yeah,” said Sel, “And how come your hair isn't wet?"

  "Five suit,” I said. “Turned it on just before I ducked under."

  "That's cheating,” Toni reiterated.

  I shrugged slightly and grinned so that she'd know the full extent of my remorse and said, “Had to breathe down there."

  Setting my Dr Pepper bottle down, I headed for the bathroom. On the way I keyed my implant and asked, “Steph, are you considering recruiting Sel and Toni for your PFM company?"

  "No, Ed. I have no immediate need of more employees."

  "Understood. Would you have any objections to issuing Sel and Toni demo units?"

  "No. I'll make and deliver them before I excuse myself."

  "Thanks, milady. You're leaving us?"

  "Yes."

  Her flat, one-word answer didn't invite further questions, so I didn't ask them. I finished up in the bathroom and returned to the pool deck. Moments later the screen door seemed to open itself and three small, shining objects zipped into the deck enclosure to land in Steph's slightly extended left hand.

  Two of the objects were standard PFM's, which she placed on the table. The third was a circlet about three inches in diameter that was obviously meant for Tiger. Since Tiger had argued about every collar I'd ever put on him, I expected there to be a bit of a discussion.

  Nope. Steph called Tiger to the table and spoke to him at length in cat-ese. Tiger answered in his affirmative fashion and lifted his chin so Steph could place the collar around his neck, where it constricted slightly for a perfect fit.

  The little guy sat looking at Steph for a moment, spoke again, and put a paw on Steph's hand. He then hopped down and walked to the pool. After staring at the water that barely covered the first step for a moment, he said something, jumped into the water, and jumped quickly out again.

  After examining himself thoroughly, Tiger seemed very impressed as he said something that sounded like “Waowow!"

  "Wow, hell,” I said. “He wasn't in there long enough for the water to touch his fur without using a PFM. He damned near passed himself coming and going."

  Selena giggled and said, “Quick as a cat, you could say."

  Toni said, “Most cats take a rather medieval view of getting wet unnecessarily."

  "This one sure does,” I said. I looked directly at Tiger as I added, “Whatta wuss."

  Being unable to give me the finger, he gave me an equivalent ear-flick, then stepped back into the pool. After verifying his waterproofing, he strutted over to hop back onto the table and again voiced his pleasure to Steph. When Sel reached to pet him, her eyes widened in surprise.

  "I can't quite touch him! It's as if there's something between my hand and his fur! Steph, what..? Is that collar like Ed's implant?"

  "Yes, it is,” said Steph, briefly describing PFM capabilities while using a field screen to display me in flight. She then handed one of the devices to each woman as she said, “Ed and I thought you might like to have demonstration units."

  Chapter Fifty-Eight

  Handing Sel and Toni each a PFM, Steph got to her feet and patted Tiger as she said she had some things to do elsewhere. After a round of thanks and hugs and cheek-kisses from Sel and Toni, Steph vanished, leaving Sue and me to show the ladies how to use their PFM's.

  Sel and Toni stuck the PFM's on their forearms, then spent a nervous few moments joking about what to wear with them and under what circumstances to consider calling up their protective fields.

  Neither woman seemed enthusiastic about having glider or parachute capabilities, but both were well impressed with the protective field and spent almost half an hour ‘testing’ it in the pool. Tiger participated cautiously at first, on only the topmost pool steps, then paddled around the shallow end a bit.

  At one point Tiger called up his glider and its emerald wings knocked over one of the plastic chairs almost three feet away from him.

  Unlike our gliders, his had no body bag; beneath his feet was a narrow platform with low walls around it. He could stand on it or walk around it, then pull his feet up onto it in the air.

  Tiger looked at me and said something, then looked at Sue expectantly.

  "He wants to know why his ‘bird-arms’ are so large,” said Sue.

  "Well, have fun explaining the principles of flight to him, if that's possible. Why didn't he just ask you? He knows I don't understand much cat."

  "I believe that would have to do with his understanding of our group hierarchy."

  I shrugged. “He still has to get the answer from you.” Patting Tiger and thumbing toward Sue, I said, “It's all right to ask Sue directly, Tiger."

  Sue translated and I nodded to affirm her ‘words'. Tiger regarded me for a moment, then looked at Sue. She seemed to say quite a lot in cat, after which Tiger flicked an ear thoughtfully and seemed to mull things for a while.

  "He doesn't look convinced,” I said, “Sue, ask him if he wants to try a quick flight in the yard."

  She did so. Tiger looked at the little yard, then at me. I nodded and flew a hand above the table. After another look at the yard, he stood up and spoke affirmatively.

  Just like that. The little guy had courage the size of Texas or total faith in his friends. Or both. I opened the screen door and he marched outside.

  "Elkor,” I said, “The wind is to the south. You could launch him from the fence and I can catch him at this end. If necessary, that is."

  "It won't be necessary, Ed. I won't let him make a bad landing."

  Nodding, I said, “Cool. Thanks, Elkor."

  Selena, Toni, Sue, and I congregated by the screen porch door. Elkor made a Tiger platform, Tiger got on it, and then Elkor lifted it to about twenty feet or so. After some pre-launch instructions from Elkor, Tiger spoke definitively.

  Sue said, “Tiger has activated his p-field."

  "Smart move,” I said.

  Tiger spoke again and sprouted a five-foot-wi
de pair of emerald wings. He looked at us for a long moment, then gave a loud yell and launched himself off the platform. His flight was slightly wobbly as he crossed the yard, but he didn't veer far off course. Elkor's platform followed Tiger closely.

  A few feet from us the nose of Tiger's glider tilted up slightly and his forward progress virtually stopped while he was still about two feet above the ground.

  He spoke and the kite vanished, then he dropped to the ground and strode forward with tentative steps, his tail switching agitatedly back and forth. Do cats get wobbly knees? Probably not, since they can't straighten their legs as humans do.

  Whatever Tiger said to Sue and me rang with excitement. He sat down and seemed to check himself over once, then looked up and around at the rest of us. I knelt to pat him and Selena and Toni followed suit with words of praise and enthusiasm. Sue was the last to kneel to pet him and she spoke cat to him for a moment.

  Tiger almost glowed at her words and the petting continued for another few moments before he spoke to Elkor.

  The platform drifted near him and Tiger got on it. He made another flight from the rear of the yard, then he flopped in the grass and spoke while looking at Selena and Toni.

  Sue said, “He wants to know why you aren't flying, too."

  Toni blanched and swallowed hard, then said, “Uh, well, you can tell him the yard's too small. Or something. Anything."

  I asked, “Toni, do you think we'd let anything happen to you?"

  She looked hard at me for a moment, then said quietly, “Don't pressure me, Ed."

  Shrugging, I said, “No pressure. I just asked, that's all. Sel, do you want to try your wings?"

  Sel looked at Toni and quietly said, “Maybe later, Ed."

  "Would a human demonstration flight help?"

  She shook her head tersely. “No, I don't think so. I'll try mine another time."

  Toni looked sharply at her. “Look, just because I'm chicken doesn't mean..."

  "I know, I know,” said Sel, raising her hands placatingly. “But the yard's too small. We'd have to go somewhere with more room."