Drake hasn’t said much since we left the hospital. He has a look of concern and worry on his face, but just underneath that, is anger. Lots of anger. Drake is going to be huge once he’s done growing. He already eats enough to sustain a small village and stands taller than Jake and Jeremy. I want to make sure he has a good outlet for his anger because once he explodes, he could kill someone.
“What’s going on in your head?” I take my eyes away from the road and ask.
“Nothing.” Drake’s voice is quiet and distant. Something is eating at him.
I reach over and clap him on the shoulder, showing him it’s okay to talk to me. Drake releases a breath and says, “I just feel like such a pussy. I mean, I didn’t even see it coming, Grady just knocked me out. I should have stopped him, I could have stopped him. I fucked up.”
Drake’s shoulders slump forward and he hangs his head in disappointment. I can see he’s on the verge of losing it. The industrial area of Sulfur Heights is a vacant bone yard and the perfect place for someone to let off some steam, so I pull into an abandoned parking lot of an old grain mill and motion for him to get out of the car. “Come on,” I say while exiting myself.
“What are we doing?” Drake looks puzzled as I start walking toward the old, empty building. The smell of dirt and dust are everywhere and old remnants of machines litter the inside. Gears, pulleys, chains and pieces of harvested crops are under our feet, but this place will work perfectly for what I have in mind.
“Stand here.” I motion and turn to face him. “Put your hands up, like you’re going to punch me.” Drake complies. “Good, now try and hit me.” Drake looks at me like I lost my mind, but does what I tell him. As soon as his hand accelerates toward my face, I deflect it with little effort.
“You always need to read your opponent, no matter who they are. Eyes, Drake. They will always tell you what their next move is going to be. Focus on his eyes and never let your guard down for anything. The moment you think it’s over, that’s when assholes like Grady strike, and that’s what he did. He knew, without Jake or Jeremy, you were an easy target and he took advantage of it.”
I move toward him and adjust his hands to the proper position. Drake’s eyes focus hard onto mine as I coach him, boring him with my eyes. I align my legs, hips and shoulders, taking the perfect stance, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike. Once I see him waver slightly, I throw a punch directly to his face. He reacts perfectly, deflecting my swinging fist. “Good. Again.”
We spend the next few hours sparring with each other before we climb back into the Camaro and head back toward the house. As we peel out of the parking lot, my thoughts are of Darcie, and I wonder which version of her I will see when she wakes. Regardless, I’m prepared to handle whatever she gives me.
Darcie
I trudge down the hallway rounding my way to our tiny kitchen. Stopping just outside the threshold, I look at the only family I’ve ever had. Drake gets my attention first. Leaning against the fridge, half of his beautiful face is painted purple from the blow Grady landed to his head. He’s shoveling a sandwich in his mouth and laughing through his food. Jeremy is over by the back door, intently staring at his phone with his poker face intact. Jake is partially leaning against the table, retelling a crude story of the last girl he bagged. His hands are animated, waving around with the words spewing from his mouth. Across from Jake is my knight. He looks absolutely wonderful. Leaning against the counter, arms folded across his firm chest, shoulder length, golden hair perfectly tousled and one foot propped on the cabinet.
His aqua blue depths lock with mine and an enormous grin lights up his face. Everything freezes as I make my way to the kitchen. Eight eyes all locked on me. I move to the center of the kitchen and roll my shoulders back. I’m going to be the Darcie they recognize. The loud mouthed, feisty bitch they know and love. Not the abuse victim or attempted rape survivor. I refuse to be the broken little girl they met three years ago. We can move on from this and restore the family dynamic to what it was before Grady McGuire fucked everything up.
I open my mouth to flip Jake a smartass comment, but the sobs I’ve been desperately trying to keep contained, break free. Every ounce of sorrow, guilt and pain for my family boils to the surface and explodes from me like an erupting volcano. I roll my head forward, covering my face with my hands, while my shoulders rack from the deep sobs.
“I’m so ssssorry.” It’s the only thing I can get out of my mouth.
Instantly I’m surrounded by giants, the center of their circle. I’m engulfed in eight strong arms as each member of my family grabs a hold of me, squeezing tightly. Sounds of my sobs and deep sighs of relief fill the kitchen as we all hold each other. Each one of us releasing the pain we suffered by the hands of Grady McGuire. We stay in each other’s arms for several moments before we break free from the huddle.
I wipe the tears with the back of my hand and look each of them in the eye. Moving to the fridge, I grab a hold of Drake around the waist and squeeze. His arms fall onto my shoulders, sharing in my embrace. “Thank you,” I whisper into his shirt. The guilt is considerable as I look at the bruise on his face. “I’m so sorry that happened to you, but for what it’s worth, thank you.”
“You’re welcome, sis. I’m glad to see you’re feeling better.” Drake flashes me his dimples and award-winning smile. I can’t help returning one back to him.
Jeremy is tucking himself into the doorway to the back stairs. He won’t make eye contact with me, but I know he’s just trying to maintain the strong, manly presence his older brother possesses. Crossing the cold tile floor, I grab his hand and thread my fingers with his. Jeremy lifts his chin and locks his brown eyes with mine. “Thank you, Jer. I’m truly sorry if I let you down. I should have listened to everyone, telling me Grady was bad news, but thanks for saving me. I wouldn’t be here without you.”
Jeremy says nothing as he wraps me in a tight hug that I return with my arms planted around his waist, squeezing tight.
“Sure, I see how you are. Giving him all the credit for your rescue, Darcie?” Jake jokes.
“Of course not and as much as I hate to admit this, Jake, you were right. About Grady. I should have listened to you. I’m sorry.”
“Pardon me?” Jake replies, cupping his ear. He looks around the room dramatically as he asks, “Did hell freeze over because I think Darcie just admitted I was…right?”
The room erupts into laughter as I playfully punch Jake in the gut. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Enjoy the moment because it won’t happen again.” I smirk.
Jake snags me into his arms. “Love you, sis. Now keep your ass out of trouble, would ya?’
I release a giggle. “Yeah…I’ll try.”
Next is Reggie’s turn. There are so many emotions going through me when I look at him. His smile is wide and eyes are gleaming, waiting for me to spread my thanks. Reggie drops his arms from his chest and places them by his side. I take in everything I love about him. Strong protective arms, fierce blue eyes, rock hard abs, and most importantly, his enormous heart.
I stand next to Jake, leaning back into the table, and look at him. “There is so much I need to say to you, Reg, but I’m not sure where to start.” Audience or not, I cannot keep the feelings bottled. They have to be set free. I take a deep breath and open the emotional flood gate. “You’ve done so much for me over the last three years and the only thing I’ve done is be a pain in the ass. I’m so sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused, so I want to say thank you, Reggie. Thank you for saving my life. Thank you for putting up with all my dumbass antics; from all the fighting and school suspensions to the stealing and arguing.” My eyes drop to the floor and I can feel the baseball rise again in my throat. I choke it down so I can continue.
Releasing a deep breath I let my heart expel every emotion it’s been harboring over the last month. “As soon as I looked into your eyes, I knew there was something truly special about you and I can honestly say, I’ve loved you from the moment we met
. I know I’m young and maybe a little naïve, but I feel like the oldest seventeen-year-old in the world. I was forced to survive on my own when no one was there to protect me. Then you showed up, my knight in shining armor and the hero I’d been begging for, but it wasn’t until recently that I realized what all those feelings meant. Then I really looked into your eyes and I was hooked, addicted to you.
“I do want to experience life outside Sulfur Heights, but I don’t want to do it without you. It’s impossible for me to function away from you. I need to see you every day. I need to feel your arms around me before I go to bed at night. I need…you. I can’t breathe without you, Reggie. I. Love. You.”
The room is deathly quiet. The only sound passing through the room is the faint hum from the refrigerator. Reggie’s look of astonishment is plastered all over his face. I can feel the embarrassment creep onto my face, brushing my cheeks red, but I keep my eyes locked on his. I am young and I do have a life to live, but I refuse do it without him.
I can’t do it without him.
Reggie repositions himself on his feet, clearly lost for words. He starts to clear his throat, but before he can get a single word out, I rush to him. I lock my arms around his strong neck and pull his mouth down to mine. Our lips meld together and we are kissing. He doesn’t resist me, instead he consumes me. Reggie grips the nape of my neck in one hand and my back in the other, careful not to touch my cut as he pushes me closer to him.
My hands tangle in his golden hair as I kiss him with every ounce of love I have within me. I whisper into his lips, “I love you so much.”
He doesn’t say anything, just returns his love with deep strokes of his tongue. We kiss for what feels like hours. We kiss for all the times we wish we could, but were fighting with our denial. We kiss until our lips our puffy and our air supply is nearly gone.
As we pull our swollen lips away, I look up into his aqua eyes and feel completely lost in him. Those damn eyes. In my world of darkness, it’s those blue eyes that will always set me free.
Reggie
My world has been flipped upside down from Darcie’s confession and I couldn’t be happier. She laid all her cards on the table and all I can do is fold. I’m tired of running from my feelings for her. I need her as much as she needs me. It took the hell Grady put us through over the last month for my heart to convince my head she’s right where she needs to be and that’s in my arms.
As I look into Darcie’s eyes, I can see the strength and courage of a woman who was dealt the worst hand life could give and then she pushed through it. She is amazing and she loves me.
Her arms are still wrapped around my body. I lean down and absorb the scent of vanilla coming off her skin. I finally find my voice and say, “Looks like we cleared the room.” I look around the empty kitchen; the boys have disappeared.
Darcie releases a small giggle and says, “I’m going to get so much shit from Jake about this.”
“You and me both, Darcie.” Jake will defiantly be teasing us until one of us does something else for him to capitalize on. He loves to seize moments he can embarrasses me about and then never let those moments go. Right now, though, embarrassment is the opposite of how I feel.
I lean down and kiss the purple bruise on her cheek. Her face is still slightly swollen, but looks ten times better than it did last night. Darcie moves to the refrigerator and pulls a jug of orange juice out. I turn and grab a glass from the cupboard and hold it while she fills it to the brim.
I hand over the glass of orange juice and tuck loose strands of hair behind her ear. She begins to gulp down the juice, emptying it in no time. “You need to get your rest. Come on.”
She’s moving very slow and I’m sure her body feels like it’s been run through a meat grinder. I carefully sweep her up in my arms and she instantly tucks her head against my chest. The walk back to her room feels like I’m walking on a cloud, that this should be a dream. I pictured so many times for this moment to be real. I can’t believe it’s happening.
Laying her on the bed, I look over to this woman and confess my heart. “Darcie, I love you. Internally, I’ve been struggling with my feelings for you for a long time. What happened between us in the storage room, it was the most incredible night of my life. I’ve been craving the feeling of your body against mine, to press my lips to yours…it almost killed me to stop. I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you lately. I was trying to push you away. I was unsure how to react to your feelings and it’s my fault you were in the mess with Grady. If I was only honest with you from the beginning, last night would have never happened. However, I was too caught up in what I thought was good for you and all I accomplished is handing you over to the spawn of Satan himself. I’m so sorry for everything.”
I brush my hand down her arm and get lost in the scar on her left shoulder. The perfectly round, wrinkled skin that began the years of tortuous pain her body would be victim to. I’m now responsible for one of those memories. All because I was too big of a pussy to tell her how much I love her.
Darcie grabs my hand and shakes her head. “No. This is not your fault. I knew what I was doing with Grady. I knew the thought of us together was driving you crazy, but I kept on because I wanted you to feel as rejected as I did. Deep down, I always had a bad feeling about Grady, but I let pride override my judgment and that is why I ended up where I was last night. Don’t, for one more minute, think it’s your fault. You’re not to blame, Reggie.”
She is simply incredible. I cup her cheeks in my palms and crash my lips into hers. Our tongues begin to dance in each other’s mouth and her hands start to explore my body. Hesitantly, she sneaks them under my shirt and runs her palms up the front of my abs and chest. I release a deep moan from the back of my throat. Her hands are warm and the skin is soft. My dick instantly presses against my jeans. I want to touch her. My body craves to strip her of her clothing and have her lie naked underneath me. I am practically panting with want, but it’s too soon. I want to do it right. She deserves for the moment to be special. We have to wait.
I break our kiss, feeling breathless. She looks at me with desire and I know instantly that it’s going to be fucking impossible to keep resisting her. My will power is already dissolving. Before I can open my mouth, a loud grumble comes from the pit of her stomach and we both laugh.
“Hungry?” I ask through my laugh.
“Starving.”
“What would you like? Anything you want. I will either make it or send Jeremy to get it.”
She deliberates for a moment then smiles. “Pancakes, sausage, hash browns and…scrambled eggs.”
I release another laugh and shake my head. “Wow, all that now. Okay, angel, it’s all yours, but I think I need to recruit the boys for some help.”
“That’s probably a good idea.” She moves off the bed to her dresser, pulling out her favorite comfy pants, t-shirt, bra and panties. I force myself to look away as I feel my dick getting hard again. God, this woman is going to kill me before we even get started.
“I’m going to get started on your food. I’ll let you know when it’s done.” I walk over to her, cup her face in my hands, and delicately kiss her lips. “I love you.”
“I love you,” she whispers back as her green eyes glisten, but this time the welled up tears are not from pain, they’re from happiness, and I’m thrilled the happiness is because of me.
***
Jeremy returns from the store with all the ingredients for Darcie’s requested meal. I’m glad all the boys are here. Not only do I need to enlist Jake’s talent in the kitchen, I really need to talk to them about what just happened between Darcie and me.
As I get the pans and mixing bowls out to start stirring the pancake batter, I call the boys in the kitchen.
“Guys, I wanted to talk to you about what’s going on between Darcie and me. This is something we’ve been resisting for a long time and, with the events of last night, I can’t hold it back anymore.” I cross my arms across my chest then run m
y hands through my hair. Fuck. This is so damn awkward.
“Fifty bucks, Jeremy!” Jake shouts from the kitchen doorway.
“Dammit, Jake, I’m trying to be serious here.” Aggravated, I yank the fridge open and grab the gallon of milk.
“So am I, Reg. Jeremy owes me fifty bucks. I called this shit like six months ago.” He crosses the kitchen and snatches the bills from Jeremy’s outstretched hand.
“What do you mean you called this? You had a bet going?” I swear these boys can be complete douche bags sometimes.
“Yep, we were tossing back beers in the garage one night and you were bitching about Darcie getting suspended from school for the millionth time. Then, she came into the garage, spitting out her infamous apology and you crumbled. I bet Jeremy fifty bucks you’d be all over her in a year.” Jake gets the rest of the groceries out and starts sorting everything we will need to make the rest of the meal. “Drake witnessed the bet and here we are.”
There’s nothing I can say. I am lost for words. I had no idea I was so transparent, however, when it comes to Darcie, there’s so much I can’t hide. I feel compelled to ask what he is talking about, though. “And how did a numbskull like you catch onto this before we even realized what was going on?”
“Easy. There is no way in hell you would let any of us get away with the shit she’s done. At first, I thought it was because she was a girl and all that other crap she went through, but lately, when she even looks at you, you turn into a lovesick pussy. It’s written all over your face.”
“Now that things have changed, is this going to be weird for you guys?” The last thing I want is anyone to be uncomfortable with our relationship. Darcie never looked at me like I was a brother, like she did the boys; she always looked at me differently. She would study my eyes, almost getting lost in them, and I have never once seen her look at them that way.
Scarred Love Page 17