First Love

by Clymer, J. E.

  “Glad to see you have some humility about it,” she asked sweetly.

  Jared sighed and let the barb go, then he said, “Lisa, you’re right. You’ve lived her almost a decade and don’t slip up, but now you have. I might know why, but I need an honest answer from you. Are you connected to any of the five territories?”

  Lisa’s eyes narrowed as she chose her words carefully, “No, Jared, I am in no way connected to any of the five existing packs.”

  “You’re lying, I can hear it in your heart beat,” Jared said simply.

  “The tie is old and no longer valid. Let it go, Jared,” she said.

  “Ties do not just break, Lisa,” he said.

  “Sometimes they do, Jared. Why is this important anyway?” she asked with a small groan.

  “If you had a connection to a pack territory you would be sensing…” he started.

  “I’m not sensing anything,” Lisa interrupted a little too quickly.

  “Sure, you aren’t,” Jared said with a knowing smile.

  “I am serious, Jared. If there are hunters involved I don’t want to be. I have my own hunter problems,” she said firmly.

  “Fine, but I have to have your word you won’t push me like that again,” he said.

  “You have a deal as long as you don’t try to scare the hell out of me when you don’t get your own way, and if you keep it to yourself that I’m a wolf. I know you’re not interested in women, but your brother, Mac and Conner are. Our kind don’t throw that many females and I’d prefer not to be harassed,” Lisa said.

  “I don’t know if I can keep that secret, Lisa. Don’t you know how important you are to our kind?” he asked.

  “I know my aging slowed to crawl about the same time I got cheek bones, so I have time to choose my own fate. I’m not a pack kind of girl, Jared. If you try to push I will run and not look back. I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again,” she said with unwavering certainty.

  Jared looked at her and with a tired groan he nodded and said, “Fine, but I am keeping an eye on you. Our race can’t afford for even one of our women to be hurt, especially not an alpha.”

  “I can accept that,” Lisa conceded.

  Jared relaxed against the bar beside her and said, “I don’t suppose you want to share why you don’t want a pack.”

  “Did you miss the part where I’m in therapy now? I’ve got issues,” she answered with a shrug.

  Jared reached for her hand where it rested on the counter, but stopped himself.

  “I need to go. I…uh…don’t want to be tired for tonight’s performance,” he said.

  “Well, get then,” she said with a warm smile.

  Jared’s tanned skin heated at her smile and his blush made Lisa hold her breath. If she didn’t she was afraid her heart might jump out of her chest. He nodded and walked out of the bar reluctantly. Lisa breathed a sigh of relief when he was finally out the door.

  Lisa cleaned the bar from top to bottom that afternoon and the place practically sparkled when Lance walked in at three in the afternoon. He looked around with wide eyes and a pleased smile.

  “Baby girl, you’ve been busy,” he praised her.

  “Why, yes, I have. How would you like to be in charge at night?” she asked.

  “You know I am happy to cover for you whenever you need it, baby girl,” he said, while pouring himself some beer.

  “I was thinking on a more permanent basis. Of course, you’d have to hire yourself a bartender,” she said casually.

  Lance walked over beside her and sat the half-filled beer on the counter and looked at her in disbelief. When he did finally find his voice he asked, “Are you promoting me?”

  “Not really. You said it yourself, you are already make a good manager. I just need to get on the ball and pay you for it,” she said with a wide smile.

  Lance scooped her up into a bear hug and he gave her an exaggerated kiss on the cheek. The kiss made her skin crawl, but she still managed a wide smile for him. Pulling a hundred dollar bill out of her back pocket she handed it to him.

  “Consider that your first bonus and a thank you. If you hadn’t been complaining to the boys incessantly then Conner would have never insisted I see his brother. I had no idea how tired I really was until I actually slept,” she said.

  “Then you are going to start sleeping at night like a normal person. I worry about you, Lisa. You ain’t got nobody. So, now that you’re done trying kill yourself we need to find you a man,” Lance said with a conspiratorial smile.

  “No thank you,” Lisa said with emphasis on the thank you.

  “A woman then? Lord, knows I don’t judge, baby girl,” Lance teased.

  “I—no, none of the above. I don’t do relationships,” she said despite laughing.

  “In my experience, when people say that they really mean that they haven’t found anyone worth having a relationship with. There are a lot of good men in this area. You just have to open yourself up enough to get to know them,” he said.

  “Lance, why is it that most of the time I feel like you’re my mother?” Lisa asked.

  Lance snickered, but he did not comment on here question. Instead he set to working getting the bar set up the way he liked it. He stacked his glasses and moved the liquor bottles around. Lisa tried to help, but he swatted her away.

  “Go on home, baby girl. You’ve put in a good eight hours. Consider that manager’s orders,” he said with a smile.

  Lisa didn’t even argue with him. She untied her apron and tossed it under bar. Grabbing her purse from the office she walked back out towards the bar. Lance was looking far too pleased with himself when she walked back out.

  “What?” she asked.

  “I made a call, baby girl. If you walk slowly enough Conner should be getting here right about now,” he said.

  She crossed her arms and shook her head as she said, “Lance, you are going to get yourself in trouble one of these days meddling in other people’s lives.”

  “Meddling is what I do, baby girl. Now get on out that door and don’t make that boy wait,” he said with mischief in his eyes.

  Rolling her eyes Lisa walked out the front door to find Conner waiting in his car. He smile and waved at her when she stepped outside. Walking over she slipped into the passenger seat next to him.

  “If you keep skipping work to go out with me, you might get fired,” she said to him with a warm smile.

  Conner chuckled and said, “Don’t worry. My boss loves me.”

  She laughed as she buckled he black seatbelt. Lisa couldn’t help rolling her eyes. Conner just drove with a silly grin on his face. The moment was perfect. Lisa was happy and relaxed; she couldn’t remember the last time she was this happy.

  Leaning back in the seat she just enjoyed the smells floating on the wind whipping through the open windows of the car. Conner shot her sideways glances from time to time, but he didn’t dare say or do anything that might ruin her blatant happiness.

  After a ten minute drive she felt the car slide to a graceful stop. Opening her eyes Lisa groaned when she saw the large building they were parked in front of. She turned in her seat so she was facing Conner.

  “You can’t be serious,” she said with laughter lacing her tone.

  “Every woman should own a dress. Besides, I made you a promise. That make-up store has three ladies that are going to meet you at the salon,” he said with a smile.

  “So, what? I’m getting all dressed up with no place to go?” she asked.

  “Oh, we’re going somewhere. I am just not telling you where yet,” Conner teased.

  Chapter 4

  Tamika pushed against Bryan’s back as hard as she could. At only eight she wasn’t strong enough to win the fight against gravity when pushing the older boy. Tears welled up in her eyes as she grew more frustrated.

  “I’m sorry,” she cried.

  Bryan jumped out of the swing and pulled the little girl into his arms. He rocked her and she burrowed into his side so
he couldn’t see her face as she took gasping breaths through her tears. He patted the little girl’s back protectively.

  “It’s okay. You’re little, so you’re not supposed to be strong,” he soothed her.

  “Really?” Tamika asked while wiping her eyes.

  “Really, really,” Bryan said with a smile. “Let me push you a little while.”

  Tamika immediately jumped up into the swing. He pulled it back and let it go, then each time the swing came back towards him Bryan gave Tamika a hard push on the back. Her laughter echoed throughout the playground.

  Bryan felt better every time he heard her laugh, which is why he had come back to the playground six weeks in a row. All the two children did was play on the swings. Neither one shared much about their home life, but it almost made their friendship all the more solid because of it.

  A dark-haired little boy around the same age as Tamika walked into the playground. He immediately saw Tamika and Bryan and headed for them. He watched them for a few moments with his little arms crossed.

  When her hazel eyes stopped staring at the sky and she saw the boy she tried to stop swinging and instead fell out directly onto her knees. Tamika cried as the hard rubber tore at the soft skin of her knees. Bryan was at her side instantly, comforting her.

  He glared at the new little boy and said, “This is your fault, you scared her.”

  “She is not supposed to be three blocks from home,” he said in a voice that obviously imitated his father. It was too high pitched and he was too short for it to sound as annoyed as he had obviously hoped it would.

  “That is no excuse for getting her hurt,” Bryan grumbled as he started to help her up.

  Suddenly the dark haired little boy pushed him down and away from Tamika. His little voice was cold as he yelled, “Stay away from my mate!”

  Bryan’s eyes widened into saucers. They landed squarely on Tamika and in that moment her warm friend that made her laugh looked at her as if she was a monster. There was no sadness in Bryan’s eyes, just anger and betrayal. Tamika only saw the cold. When he turned and ran, she knew she had lost her friend.

  ###

  Lisa tried on all of the four dresses she would be open to wearing in the formal shop. She could tell that it was driving Conner crazy, but she would not wear anything without sleeves. Conner had eyed the dresses she chose as if they were less than dirt.

  “There are some beautiful mini-dresses that you could try,” he prompted.

  Sighing she slipped on the first of her four dress choices and said, “I have to have sleeves, Conner. There’s a tattoo on my arm that is seven different kinds of bad and it will stay covered.”

  “I never realized you always wore long sleeves. Still, we can put make-up over the tattoo,” he offered.

  “Nope, besides, I think I like this black one,” she said and stepped out of the dressing room.

  The black dress fit her almost perfectly, despite being designed for a shorter woman. The bottom hem of the wrap was designed to fall just above the knee, but on here it was half-way up her thigh. The fabric hugged her tight and her bra just barely hid under the neckline. The sleeves made it both casual and elegant because they hugged her arms tightly all the way past her elbow where they expanded dramatically with frilly fabric.

  Conner eyed her from head to toe before he smiled and said, “Well, when you’re right, you’re right. Come on, let’s go get your hair and make-up done.”

  A woman in the dress store sat a pair of black pumps in front of her that she slipped into. They walked five stores down to a high end salon where three women descended on her. Lisa could not even remember the last time her hair was cut.

  Six inches of silky black hair covered the floor. Lisa’s head literally felt light with the new shoulder length layered cut. While the hair dresser had been working behind her head, two other women had been working on her face. They put on twenty different types of make-up. Her skin felt dirty and the smell of powder filled her nose. The three women finished her off with a liberal spritzing of another perfume.

  None of the three women had spoken to her the whole time they had worked on her and they were equally as silent as they finished. If they had not taken three steps back she probably would not have even realized that they were finished with her. Stepping out of the chair she turned and saw a completely different woman.

  Lisa had a tendency to throw on a pair of jeans, hoodie, and boots. There was nothing in her closet less than five years old. Primarily because she hated to shop. She didn’t even own concealer. Lisa had been alone her whole life and assumed that she was just the plain kind of pretty—she simply did not sparkle. She stared in the mirror at a runway model. Conner walked up behind her and whistled.

  “Dang, baby girl, you clean up well,” he complimented her.

  “Yeah, I guess I do,” she said absently.

  “C’mon, we’re going to be late,” he said.

  They went out to his car and they slid into the seats. He popped the car into gear and the wheels squealed as they pulled out of the parking lot.

  “You’re still not going to tell me where we’re going?” she asked.

  “Nope,” he said with a silly smile.

  They drove for some time before pulling up in front of a wide red brick mansion. Lisa marveled at the straight lines of its architecture. It was a new building designed with the intent of old-world charm.

  “Café a la Conner,” he said with a grin.

  “I don’t think I have ever seen you eat anything other than fast food,” Lisa plainly pointed out.

  “That is simply because you’ve never been to my house,” he said with a grin.

  She rolled her eyes, but took his hand as he opened the car door for her. Her stomach tumbled as their skin touched. Conner did not miss just how quickly she broke their touch. Every second that Conner spent with her he wondered just how horrible her life had been before settling at the bar that she couldn’t tolerate another person’s touch for more than a few moments.

  He led her into the home and sat her down on the couch, saying, “Relax and watch TV while I cook.”

  “I could help,” she said.

  “No way, baby girl, you’ve been working far too much the last few weeks. Relax, it won’t take that long,” Conner said gently.

  Lisa settled in front of the largest television she had ever seen. It filled almost the entire space from floor to ceiling. Turning it on she flipped through the channels until she finally settled on a show about how the universe was made.

  Conner hid in the kitchen for probably thirty minutes before he brought two large plates of sushi out. She raised her eyebrow as she eyed the dish. Picking up a small piece she popped it in her mouth and savored the flavor.

  “The local Japanese restaurant really out did their selves with these,” she said in between swallowing and grabbing another piece.

  “I’m hurt. I’ve spent the last thirty minutes in the kitchen slaving away to make you the perfect sushi and you think it’s from a restaurant,” he pouted.

  “I eat there all the time because I don’t cook. How did you know sushi was my favorite?” she asked.

  “I might have mentioned you were my guest,” Conner said with a deep blush.

  She laughed as she took another bite. Conner took a piece and popped it in his mouth. The look on his face was absolutely priceless. It looked as if it took a supreme exercise of his willpower to swallow the thing.

  “I take it you aren’t fond of sushi?” she said.

  “It’s the green stuff around it. What’s the point of adding the meat if there’s so little?” he asked.

  “First off, the green stuff is seaweed and it is very good for you. Second, not everyone likes a lot of meat. The reason it’s so filling is the rice,” she said with a warm smile.

  “I could still order us steak,” he said simply.

  “Go for it. I eat anything,” Lisa replied.

  She knew if she didn’t he’d pick at the sushi
, but never really eat it. Conner had this odd sense of propriety. Lisa could see the relief in his face as he dialed the number of a local steakhouse. He order two medium-rare steaks and gave them his address. Obviously it wasn’t the first time he’d gotten them to deliver.

  “Do you really like this stuff?” he asked, poking at the sushi one more time.

  “I love it and would happily take it home with me,” she said.

  Conner was a sweet man, but they sat in an awkward silence as they waited for the next delivery. More than once she caught him looking at her from head to toe with a hungry appreciation. Every so often Conner would scoot a little closer to her on the couch.

  “So, um…I am glad to hear Dean helped you,” he said.

  There were a few very obvious rules to dating. High on that list had to be that you don’t bring up your date’s mental instability. Conner was a friend, but this was just not going to work.

  “He did. Conner, I know you’re trying here, but I think we are better as friends,” she said gently.

  “I can’t help but agree. It does save time if we aren’t trying to date,” he said and then licked his lips.

  Lisa let out a sigh of relief at his first sentence, so the second one did not sink in until his mouth covered hers. He kissed her like he was trying to devour her. His touch set her skin on fire and not in a good way. It felt as if every nerve in her body was screaming out in pain.

  “No,” she managed to break away from the kiss and whisper.

  “No?” Conner asked, obviously confused.

  “Get the hell off me,” she said while fighting an attack of dizziness.

  Conner scrambled off her as if he had been slapped. He looked confused and lost as he said, “No woman has ever told me no.”

  “Well, I am,” she said as she got up off the couch.

  Lisa walked straight for the front door. Conner scrambled after her and grabbed her arm.

  “You just need to calm down. Another minute or two and I promise you’ll love it,” he said.

  She jerked her arm out of his grasp and stepped outside. Looking back at him she said, “No means no. I will pay you back for the dress. Conner, I am going to let this go; but if you ever make me feel this cheap again I won’t want to see you.”