Be With You

by Candy J. Starr

  I pulled away. "Tex! They're just outside."

  "I'd better make this fast then," he said.

  That was so wrong but I couldn't push his hands away. I needed him so much. It'd been far too long since we'd been together. I missed him. I missed his touches. I ached for him but I could hear footsteps crunching on the gravel outside.

  He bit my neck, making me cry out.

  "Is the back door locked?" I gasped.

  "I bloody hope so," he said, unzipping his jeans. He ground his hard cock against me. "Do you want me to stop?"

  "Yes... no... I don't know..."

  He kissed me again. I pulled away to resist him but his lips never left mine and I didn't have the willpower to stop him.

  His lips moved to my neck.

  “Whoa, Tex, we have to stop.”

  “Yes, we do,” he said with his mouth but his hand said otherwise, squeezing my nipple.

  With his other hand he slipped my knickers down, spreading my legs apart, stroking my thighs, moving inside me.

  “Seriously, we have to stop...”

  But he kissed me again and I couldn't speak. His fingers – he had the road map to the Ruby Wonderland. Special instructions just for me. I reached out, grabbing the edge of the counter, biting my lip to muffle my screams, biting into his shoulder, clasping my mouth onto his and drinking him in.

  I could hear them, talking outside. They were getting closer.

  Tex lifted me onto the bench. His cock slipped inside the Ruby Wonderland as Devon banged on the door.

  "Just a moment,” Tex called. “You guys go ahead and set up."

  I couldn't breathe, not with Devon on the other side of the door. I'd kill Tex for this -- but I couldn't stop him.

  He pounded into me like a man possessed. I dug my fingers into him, trying not to scream, the ache inside me finally sated.

  "Fuck, I've missed this," he whispered into my ear as he slumped against me.

  "Wow, it really was only five minutes," I said, jumping off the bench.

  He spun me around pressing himself against my back. "I could go again, if you want."

  "Get and rehearse," I told him, trying my hardest to push him away. "Or we'll be here all day."

  He reluctantly pulled his jeans back on.

  "You absolutely sure?"

  I bit my lip, about to be swayed, when Devon knocked on the back door. I grabbed my panties off the floor and pulled them back on.

  Tex unlocked the door and the two of them walked into the kitchen.

  "We thought we'd grab some drinks," said Devon giving me a knowing wink.

  I blushed.

  The new guy lingered behind him. Wow, he was incredibly tall. He towered over Devon and Devon was pretty tall himself. He slumped over as though trying to hide his tallness and I mostly saw his shock of white blonde hair.

  "I'm sure you have plenty to work on," Tex said. "At least you'll have quiet in the house."

  I tried to work up a smile. Yeah, I had plenty to work on. Plenty of nothing. With Devon and the new guy there, I couldn't tell him about the whole getting sacked thing. It could wait though. Once I started that discussion, I wasn't sure where it would go and, if I only had Tex for one night, I wanted to keep things happy and shiny.

  I went into the study with my laptop but those creepy feelings came back again. I really didn't like being in this house alone. It just didn't feel right.

  Tex slammed the back door but I wanted to make sure he'd locked it. I sat my laptop down then went to check. He'd forgotten, again. He knew how much I hated being in the house with the door unlocked. I marched out to the studio and chucked his key at him.

  "I'm locking the back door," I said.

  "Sorry, Ruby."

  "Don't be sorry, just don't do it again." That sounded really cranky but I hated having to go out to the studio and admitting I was scared, especially in front of the new guy. He looked at me like I was a freak.

  "If you want, you can hang out here while we rehearse. That might be better than being alone in the house."

  That didn't help things at all. It just made me look pathetic.

  "I'll be fine."

  "Really, Ruby, I'd feel better with you out here with us. After everything that's happened... shit, I should've thought of it before. Grab your stuff and come out here."

  His tone made me more determined to go back inside. Anyway, I'd spent enough time in the studio in my life. Even with headphones on, it drove me crazy.

  When I got back inside, with the door firmly locked and the curtains pulled tight, I settled into the recliner and got watching me some Teen Wolf. Another of CJ's recommendations.

  I didn't even notice Tex come back in until he was right in front of me, then I almost jumped through the roof. My heart raced and anger coursed through me. I knew that was unreasonable but you shouldn't scare a person like that.

  "We're having a break for dinner. I thought you might've got something together." He glanced at my laptop. "It doesn't look like you’re all that busy with work."

  I slammed my laptop shut.

  "Please tell me you're joking? Because I don't have time to kill you right now and I'll need to put it on my list." I didn't like his assumption that I was around to look after him.

  "What?" Tex turned to Devon and grinned.

  "Seriously, Tex, I'm in the middle of something right now. I don't have time to cook your dinner and even if I did, I’m not your housekeeper any more."

  The three of them looked like chastised schoolboys that just annoyed me more.

  "That's cool, we can just order pizza," said Dong.

  Tex and Devon both gasped and glared at him.

  "It's okay, I'm not going to have a nervous breakdown just because the guy mentions pizza. But there should be some stuff in the freezer that you can defrost."

  I shrugged and went back to my recliner, finishing watching the episode.

  "Dinner's ready, Ruby." Tex didn't bother saying any more.

  I went into the kitchen and sat with them. Holy shit, I hadn't wiped down the bench. That was so unhygienic. If I jumped up and wiped it though, it'd look suspicious to Dong and Devon. They'd know exactly why I was wiping it and I didn't want their thoughts turning to the Ruby Wonderland.

  “I’ll make sure we lock the door and take the key when we go back out,” Devon said.

  Even though he was trying to be nice, it bugged me when Devon said stuff like that. He was such a suck-up and half the reason he said it was to stir Tex up. Still I smiled.

  “Thanks.”

  Devon shook his head. "How did you ever deal with being stuck out here, so far away from any kind of civilisation?"

  "You tool. It's not that far from things." Tex answered.

  "Yeah but you didn't have a car or means of escape. I'm glad that Ruby isn't living here alone."

  I'd never really thought too much of it before. It was different when we lived in the studio. Even with that creepy stalker around, she was something tangible, not the general feeling of creepiness I got in the house. Maybe because the studio was so small and Tex had always been close by when we’d lived there. I hated that this house was so big, someone could get in and I wouldn't even know. The creaking of the house and the wind blowing through the trees outside didn't help.

  "How's rehearsal going?" I asked.

  They all looked pretty happy about it. Then they got talking about band stuff so I snuck out to watch another episode. I didn't need to listen to their music talk.

  When I went in the kitchen later, all the dinner dishes had been washed up and put away. It made me feel bad about snapping at Tex earlier. He was probably feeling stressed about the band stuff too. I hadn't realised how dark it had gotten until I looked out the kitchen window. It was pitch black out there except for the studio lights.

  That shouldn't have made any difference to me but I became skittish. I sure as hell didn't want to watch anything about vampires or werewolves or other supernatural creatures. Even things th
at had seemed funny before made my skin crawl. The worst thing was when someone looked in the mirror and something stood behind them. I shuddered and slowly backed away from the kitchen window until I could no longer see my reflection.

  If I ran out to the studio and sat around while Tex rehearsed, I'd look like a quivering idiot, too weak to even stay in the house alone after dark. Since we'd moved out of the studio, it didn't feel like I belonged there any more. It was Tex's space, filled with his Tex stuff.

  The night wasn't even windy but the branches of the trees creaked like a warning in the darkness. The noise echoed through the empty house.

  Hell, I had to shut my brain off. Maybe I could watch something light and happy.

  I made sure all the lights were on in the house and turned the music up to drown out the sound of creepy trees. Then I moved the recliner against the wall so nothing could creep up behind me. That meant it couldn't recline any more but I was safe. Maybe I shouldn't have come out to the house. We could've just gone up to my apartment for a quickie then I'd be curled up in my bed with no thoughts of crazy stalkers or other dangers. My apartment had a doorman and only one point of entry. I could see everything without leaving my bed too. There were no surprises.

  I went online and asked CJ for drama recommendations. Just chatting to her made me feel better. At least there was another human being out there.

  I must've drifted off to sleep while talking to her because I was woken up by voices in the kitchen, joking around. Tex turned the music off.

  "Don't wake her up, Tex," I heard Devon say.

  I stood up, stretching.

  "It's okay. I'm already awake."

  "You didn't have to sit up for me," Tex said.

  I didn't want to say that I didn't like the thought of being in the bedroom without him. I hadn't even been upstairs until I followed him to the bedroom.

  He kissed me like we'd never been apart but I could taste whiskey on his breath. He must've been drinking while they rehearsed. I had no idea exactly how much Tex had been drinking but I assumed the answer was a lot and often.

  I didn't mention it though. I didn't want to ruin the time we had together.

  We fell on the bed, tangled in each other. His fingers combed through my hair as he kissed me, his lips toying with mine.

  “Ruby, it’s so good to be with you,” he whispered then ran kisses down my neck, to my collarbone.

  My back arched, urgent with need for him. He traced my body with his fingertips as though he had all the time in the world, his touches far too tender to satisfy me.

  Then he stopped, his fingers still on my belly but not moving. I sucked in my breath, waiting for him to continue, wondering what sort of teasing game he was playing.

  I waited but he didn't respond. Then I touched him. Still nothing.

  He snored. He'd fallen asleep.

  I let him sleep. We'd have tomorrow morning. Then I'd head back to my apartment. Not enough time, not anywhere near enough time. The whiskey taste of him lingered on my lips and wrapped myself around him, letting the scent of him seep into my dreams. We’d find a way to make this work. Once he finished this tour, there’d be nothing to hold us apart.

  Then Tex turned in his sleep. He mumbled something and I put my ear closer to his mouth so I could hear better. When I realised what he was saying, it chilled me to the bone.

  “Julie…”

  CHAPTER TWENTY TWO - RUBY

  "You don’t need to do this.”

  I'd gone to Lizzie wanting to sort things out with her. She wasn't home though and Brownie had answered the door. I'd felt stupid and not sure what to say, so I'd just blurted everything out.

  Brownie's reaction surprised me. I thought that's what the fight had been about, that Lizzie was angry about the money, and he'd backed her up. Then that had caused all the tension in the band which had built up until Brownie quit. That was the entire story as I understood it but Brownie looked at me as though I was loopy and he had no idea what I meant.

  "You missed out on the performance money from the festival because of me so I figured I should pay it back. It's not the whole amount, nowhere near it, but it's something. I'm really sorry for all the trouble I caused in the band."

  Even with the money Alex Feng had paid for my app and all my savings from my salary, I only had about half of the performance fee.

  I stood in the doorway while Brownie gawked at me.

  "Come inside, Ruby. I don't think we should discuss this out here on the doorstep."

  I went into the house. He led me into the kitchen and put on the kettle.

  "It's probably better we talk about this without Lizzie around. You'll have coffee?"

  I nodded.

  He made coffee and sat down at the table with me. He stirred his drink as though stalling for time then looked up.

  "I want to apologise, Ruby. Lizzie was way out of line with what she said to you. Tex was right about that."

  "Huh?" That probably wasn't the most polite response but it was all that I was capable of.

  "When the band got back together and I played that first gig, I was so happy. It seemed like everything we'd dreamed of, our simple dreams, had been put on fast forward. Sure, we’d have still bought a house without that money but it helped. It helped a lot."

  He paused to sip his coffee, his hand trembling slightly. That made me relax. I didn't want to see him stressed but, if he was nervous, maybe this wasn't a trap to get me to lower my guard.

  “It helped Tex too.”

  He nodded. “Of course, that was on my mind at first. Tex had locked himself up in that house, sitting there rotting away with anger and pain. I had to make one more attempt to get him right. Little did I know he’d got himself a housekeeper for that.”

  Brownie smiled at me.

  "Then there was the promise of more festivals. More money than I'd ever imagined we'd have. Our dreams got bigger. And, truth be told, Lizzie got greedy. There, I said it. She was a bitch."

  I wanted to reassure him, tell him she wasn't that bad but she had been a bitch. I just nodded.

  "The whole time I was on the road, she kept messaging me. Always about money. Or the things she'd been buying. You'd have noticed all the flash clothes and bags and stuff she'd been buying. She wasn't my Lizzie any more. And it wasn't just you she had issues with. She'd been fighting with her sisters. Everyone. I hated it. Then, I was up there on stage, banging away on the drums, and realised I couldn't do it any more. I hated it. When I was a kid, it was a lark. All kinds of larks being in a band and having all those screaming fans but, that night, I looked out at the fans and wondered why they were screaming. We weren't doing anything special. We weren't saving kids’ lives or making the world a better place or even laying bricks to make houses for families to live in. We just played music."

  I nodded. I didn't agree with him but I could see his point.

  "I flew home and gave it to Lizzie straight. I might've been a bit rough on her but I had to know. I told her I hated the changes in her and if I wanted a money-grubbing bitch, I could have my pick of a thousand of them. Then I told her I was going back to school. I want to learn a real trade, doing something useful. She could live with me like that or leave."

  He scratched his head and looked up at me with a crooked grin.

  I grinned back. You could tell from the lines on his face that it'd been tough on him but Brownie had integrity. You had to give him that.

  "It took me a lot of thinking. I'd gotten so twisted out of shape. I went to my brother's place for a while to let her think things over. I had some sleepless nights, believe me. And, well, I'm back here now so you can see it all worked out."

  "That's fantastic. Does Tex know this though? Because I think he blames himself."

  "If Tex wants to know, he can ask. I'm worried about that guy."

  "Me too." I'd not admitted it to anyone else but I could open up with Brownie. He knew Tex better than I did and I could talk to him about it. My pulse raced but I n
eeded to talk about this with someone. Having Brownie’s perspective on things might make me see them more clearly.

  "He's drinking far too much,” Brownie said. “Hell, I like a drink as much as anyone but Tex drinks alone and he drinks for reasons that aren't healthy."

  "It's my fault."

  "It's not your fault, Ruby.” He patted my arm. “Tex acts tough but he's a scarred man. He's been carrying those scars for far too long. He needs to get over the things that happened."

  I hesitated before talking. There was a fear I didn't want to voice.

  "Do you think he can get over it?"

  Brownie shrugged.

  "I'm not sure. Look at the way he is with Devon. There was something that happened with the two of them on tour. I have no idea what it was. Didn't ask. Didn't want to know. They're both crazy. But he can't forgive Devon and, he sure as hell won't admit it, but he won't forgive himself."

  I drank the rest of my coffee in silence, not sure what else to say. There was always something happening between Devon and Tex. If they were drinking together, they’d have most likely ended the night with punches.

  "But you and Tex are still together?"

  "Yep. Sort of. Yes, we are."

  "And how's the new job?"

  I hadn't planned to tell him about that but he had a way of getting things out of you. He was such an easygoing guy and he really listened. The whole story came out.

  "Don't tell Tex," I said. "I'm worried what he'll do."

  He’d been so angry when I'd told him what had happened when I was at uni. If he knew that had happened again, he'd go crazy. While I had no sympathy for Chris David, I didn't want Tex getting in trouble.

  "That is really shit. You should sue them or something. I'm sure there is someone you can see about that kind of thing."

  I nodded but didn't think that was possible. I was on a contract with them. They could dismiss me any time. Still, I didn't want to get into all that.

  "I hope you don't mind me saying this but it seems to me that Tex isn't the only one that has scars that need sorting out. The two of you are good for each other. A blind fool could see that. But you both hide your hurts away without dealing with them, thinking you have to save each other. Anyway, I'm not taking your money. How could I, anyway? I mean, with me leaving the band, that probably caused even more problems. And you'll need it now if you don't have a job. I have enough. It’s the honest truth that I’m pretty content with life right now and so is Lizzie."