'TIL DEATH DO US PART (Silent Demons Book 2)

by C. Luca

  I automatically reach for the phone on the nightstand just as it vibrates. His text reads, How’s the pain? Did you get your shower yesterday?

  I set the phone down and reach for the butter to spread it on my pancakes. “The pain is manageable, and I did get the shower in. I feel much better,” I tell him as I drizzle syrup all over the pancakes.

  Nikolai nods, watching me cut a large piece from one of the pancakes and greedily slip the forkful inside my mouth. The corner of his mouth quirks as he notes how much I’m enjoying the delicious breakfast.

  It’s so good to be eating real food, and I briefly savor the pancake before my mood plummets as I think of the detective’s phone call.

  Nikolai, noting my mood change, looks at me questioningly.

  “Detective Markwell called. There’s no evidence Rob hired anyone.” I release a heavy, disappointed sigh. “There’s not much more to be done, or at least that’s how I took the conversation.”

  Nikolai doesn’t look surprised. His gaze drops to his phone as he types.

  My phone vibrates, and I read his message. The case will go to the bottom of the pile, because other homicides won’t be put on hold so he can focus on Ava’s. We need to figure this out on our own.

  He’s right, but I’m not in the mood to rehash all the bad stuff when I’m already feeling so defeated. I’ve wracked my mind over and over, and I can’t come up with anything new that would help the case.

  “I’m glad you came by this morning. I’ve been so bored,” I comment, switching the topic as I take a second bite of one of the pancakes.

  Nikolai texts, I can have Jonah bring you a Kindle or DVD player.

  I offer him a small smile, appreciating that he’s doing his best to make me comfortable during my stay. “Thank you, but the laptop is all I need.”

  Did you find a resting place for Ava? he texts as his gray eyes focus intently on mine.

  My face falls as the usual sadness overcomes me. “I did.”

  His eyes search mine, and then he turns his attention to his phone to text a reply. Text it to me, and I will pay for the arrangements, his message says.

  “Thank you, but I have it handled,” I say lightly, knowing my response is going to draw his curiosity.

  His left eyebrow lifts as he waits to see if I’m going to elaborate.

  He still has no idea about my back account, and I’m not ready to share it with him. So instead of responding to his obvious interest over where the money came from, I focus on my breakfast and how good it is.

  When I eventually glance his way, I find him watching me intently. Something’s going on in that mind of his. “What?”

  His eyes shift to his phone, and his fingers move across the screen.

  Once more, I reach for my phone and wait for his text to appear. Where did you go during the year you were gone? My forehead creases as I look up at him. “You asked me this already, remember?”

  He studies me for a moment before he turns his attention to the phone. So humor me, his text reads.

  I’m not sure why he’s asking me again, but I tell him anyway. “I moved from city to city. I never stayed in one place for too long,” I reply, cutting another slice from one of the pancakes.

  I slip the fork into my mouth and chew the piece of pancake as I watch Nikolai’s fingers move across his phone’s keyboard. When my phone vibrates, I glance at it. Did you get to know anyone? Make friends? See anyone?

  My eyebrows pull together as I begin to frown at him. “No. I worried that if I got too close to anyone, they’d be in danger because of you.”

  Another text is sent to my phone. You became close with Ava. Was there anyone else in Seattle?

  I set the fork down and narrow my eyes on him. “Why are you asking me all these questions, Nik?”

  He looks unperturbed by my suspicion, and he turns back to his phone. Because I’d like to know, he sends.

  As much as I’d like to put an end to the topic, I know I’ll have a chance to turn the tables on him when the subject winds down. “It was just Ava. There was no one else.”

  He watches me for a moment, and then his eyes drop back to his phone. I watch as he sends me another short question.

  I wait for it to appear on my screen with a sense of weariness. What is up with all these questions? What about men? his text reads.

  My eyes return to his with unconcealed exasperation. “I didn’t have sex with anyone the entire time I was away. Now why are you so focused on…” My voice trails off. “You think I’m the target, don’t you?”

  His eyes hold mine, and he inclines his head.

  I’m already shaking mine with disagreement. “I didn’t make any enemies, Nik. I’m good at laying low and keeping to myself. The only reason I let Ava in is because she was persistent,” I say thickly.

  Nikolai rubs his temple with his free hand before going back to typing. Things just aren’t adding up, Blakely, he sends.

  “It can’t be me,” I argue. “I didn’t get to know anyone while I was gone, and I haven’t gone out of my way to be overly friendly with anyone here,” I insist.

  What about coworkers? appears on my phone’s screen.

  I shake my head once more. “I’ve given no one any reason to want to hurt me,” I say confidently.

  The look in his eyes tell me that he still thinks otherwise.

  “Ava was killed first,” I quietly remind. “Then, he came for me. If I were the target, wouldn’t I have been first?”

  Nikolai turns his full attention to his phone, and then a second later, he watches me as my phone vibrates.

  He may have wanted her out of the way so he could focus on you, his text reads. I look up and give him a bitter look. “I don’t think we’ll ever know the true motive behind it.”

  For once, Nikolai simply watches me, clearly lost in thought instead of throwing more questions my way.

  I’m not one to ignore an opportunity when I see one, so I quickly switch the topic. “You owe me,” I tell him. I set aside the tray on my lap as I prepare to get down to business.

  My announcement gains me a questioning look from him.

  “It’s my turn to do some interrogating,” I say deliberately, refusing to allow him to dodge my questions.

  He looks less than thrilled over the idea, but also resigned. He nods, signaling that I can ask away.

  I relax into the pillows that I’m reclined against and focus intently on him. “You said you’re from Chicago, so you grew up here, correct?”

  He nods.

  I wish he’d use his voice, but I’d rather not be persistent and have him begin to resent me for it. “Nikolai is an unusual name; how did you end up with it?” I ask curiously.

  Nikolai doesn’t make a move to text me his response, and instead, he gazes at me for nearly a full minute, leading me to wonder if he’s going to respond. Then, his attention turns to his phone.

  I avidly wait for his text to appear. My mother grew up in a little town in Alaska named Nikolai. She named me after it. I’m thrilled that he’s sharing more about himself. I look up at him, unable to hide how much I appreciate him opening up to me. “That’s interesting. Have you visited the town?”

  He shakes his head.

  “Are your parents still alive?” I press lightly, knowing I’m venturing into dangerous territory.

  His expression tightens, and once more, he curtly shakes his head.

  “I’m sorry,” I say softly. “May I ask what your mother was like?” I dare to inquire.

  Nikolai’s body language is now tense, alerting me to the fact that he doesn’t want to discuss either of his parents. His expression remains unreadable as his fingers move across his phone’s keyboard.

  I patiently wait until his reply appears on my screen. I don’t remember much about her. I was three when she died. My heart tugs as I read his text, and then without thinking, I ask, “What do you remember?”

  I fully expect him to shut down the conversation, but much to my surpris
e, he looks to be sending another text. She used to hum to me, his text reads.

  My eyes lift, and I search his dark gaze. “So she was good to you?” I ask gently.

  He nods, a muscle flexing in his jaw.

  I should seriously quit before I risk chasing him off, but I’m getting more out of him than I thought I would, and I’m not ready to give up yet. “What was your father like?”

  Now his expression turns icy cold, and his fingers move across his phone’s screen. As soon as his fingers stop moving, he rises to his feet.

  I blink from the abruptness of his reaction and glance at my phone as it vibrates in my hand. I have things to tend to. Enjoy your day. By the time I look up again, he’s already out the door and gone.

  I’m completely crestfallen, and I know it’s entirely my fault.

  I should have respected the cues he’d given me that he didn’t want to discuss his parents, but I’d been too fascinated to let the subject rest.

  I’m also pretty certain my suspicions are correct. Nikolai’s father had probably been the one to give him the scars on his back.

  His childhood was probably more hellish than my own.

  * * *

  The next afternoon, I set the phone on the nightstand next to the bed, my chest aching painfully.

  I’d just spoken with the funeral director, and she wanted to know if there was something specific I wanted Ava dressed in for the burial that will be Monday at two. I still have two days to get an outfit to the funeral home, but I see no point in putting it off. Both Ava and I were pretty close in size, so I’m hoping I’ll have something acceptable for her to wear.

  Slowly, I ease out of the bed and lower myself to the two duffel bags near the bed. I haven’t unpacked them because there’s no reason to. I’m growing stronger each day, and I’m hoping to leave on Tuesday.

  Instead of opening the closest duffel bag, my thoughts shift to Nikolai.

  When he’d brought me my breakfast this morning, he hadn’t stayed. I’d been disappointed but sensed he needed some time to himself after the way our conversation ended yesterday.

  I wish he wouldn’t push me away like he does, but yet I’m also aware that he’s confiding things that he likely wouldn’t under normal circumstances. Even though it feels like we might be falling two steps back, we’re actually moving forward—only it’s a smidgen at a time.

  Reed had also dropped by earlier to check my wounds. Much to my relief, he’d confirmed my own assessment that I was healing well. I was, of course, warned not to overexert myself, but I’m only doing what I know my body can handle.

  Every day, the pain is lessening, and my strength is increasing.

  I turn my attention to my clothes and begin going through both bags. Ava was a vibrant soul, so I want to make certain she’s laid to rest in something that she would approve of.

  When I’m finished and have an outfit selected that reminds me of Ava, I carefully fold it and rise to my feet, walking to the dresser. I place it on the dresser top, where it’ll remain neatly folded until it’s taken to the funeral home.

  Then, I walk back to the bed and sit down, picking up my phone from the nightstand. I text, I need to send an outfit to the funeral home for Ava’s burial. I have one picked out, to Nikolai’s phone.

  Much to my surprise, he responds almost immediately. I’ll send Jonah by in a few hours to retrieve it and drop it off.

  Okay, thank you, I send.

  My phone remains silent.

  After three minutes, I sigh and set it back on the nightstand.

  I’m learning that Nikolai likes to pull away when things become too much for him, and I keep telling myself that it’s just the way he handles things. I am doing my best not to take it personally. He didn’t seem mad at me this morning, just preoccupied. He’ll let me know when he’s ready to resume our talks, and I’ll have to make certain I respect his cues.

  TWENTY-FOUR

  Blakely

  I watch the minister walk away after saying heartfelt words to me and Nikolai. The private ceremony had just finished, and the minister is walking towards the main parking lot. Though it’s paved, he watches his step as he follows the recently shoveled path throughout the cemetery.

  Now, it’s just Nikolai and I standing beside the gravesite as Ava’s gleaming, white casket waits to be lowered into the ground. Once we leave, the cemetery attendants will officially lay her to rest.

  It’s eerily silent as we stand there, and for once, the bitter chill in the air isn’t seeping into me—at least not yet. I’m bundled in a thick coat and scarf, and Nikolai insisted I also wear a hat and mittens to ward off the cold.

  He stands beside me, also wearing heavy winterwear, and patiently waiting until I’m ready to say my final goodbye and leave.

  As I gaze at the casket, I watch as snowflakes drift down from the gray sky above, wedging themselves amongst the bright floral arrangement on top.

  It might be freezing out, but with the fresh snow coating the cemetery trees, it’s beautiful.

  Unwilling to leave, I carefully ease to my knees and kneel in the snow beside the casket. Even the tranquil beauty of the snowy cemetery can’t ease my misery.

  The snow on the ground is soaking into the knees of my black pants, but I don’t care. I just need to be here until I feel I can walk away on my own, without anyone aiding me.

  Nikolai remains standing beside me, his gloved hand resting on my shoulder as he shows his support.

  I appreciate his kindness, but I’m still struggling over the knowledge that Ava’s inside the casket. Beautiful Ava, who was always so full of spirit.

  How could someone so full of life be suddenly gone?

  As much as I want it all to make sense, I also don’t want it to. Nikolai still believes I’m the target, and I’m ninety-five percent certain that I’m not.

  The small five percent scares me, though.

  What if I am the reason Ava’s dead?

  A tear drips down my cheek as I struggle against the flood that wants to be released. I thought Ava would be better off with me here in Chicago, but I was so very wrong. I don’t know who the target was, but either way, she’s still dead because I’d allowed her to come with me.

  I draw in a shuddering breath, and the bitter cold sears my lungs.

  This hurts so much.

  I miss my best friend, and I regret not giving her more of my time when I’d had the chance.

  Nikolai’s hand disappears from my shoulder, and there’s movement as I sense him squatting beside me.

  I turn my eyes to meet his kind, gray ones.

  His lips twitch before his rich, baritone breaks the heavy silence. “The c-c-cold isn’t g-g-good for…you.”

  A snowflake gets caught on my eyelash, and I blink away the wetness. “I can’t believe she’s gone,” I say bleakly.

  He falls quiet, letting me have a moment as he patiently waits until I’m ready.

  Finally, I nod, and he helps me to my feet. With one final look at the casket, I sadly turn away and allow Nikolai to escort me away from the site and to the path.

  Now that we’re leaving, I become aware of how icy cold my knees are, and the cold gust of wind on my cheeks causes me to shiver.

  Nikolai immediately slips an arm around me, and I cuddle into his side as we take our time navigating the path.

  It’s been nearly a week since the attack. My wounds are healing nicely, and I’m mostly back on my feet again. I still get exhausted easily though, and I know I’ll need to lie down once we get back to the estate.

  In the parking lot, the black limo Nikolai insisted we take is patiently idling. The driver, I believe his name is Ezra, hurriedly climbs out and opens the side door for us.

  Once Nikolai and I are seated, he pulls me close, and I rest my head on his shoulder. I have nothing to say as I grieve for Ava, so the drive back to Nikolai’s home is silent.

  When we arrive, Nikolai continues to keep me close as he walks with me to the guest room.
Desolation sweeps over me, and I stand in the middle of the room and look at him glumly.

  His eyes search mine, and he closes the guest room door and then walks over, touching my cheek.

  I give him a sad smile. “I know I’m supposed to move on, but I don’t know how I’m going to.”

  He lowers his head and presses a warm kiss to my forehead before pulling back and meeting my troubled gaze. “It will c-c-come with t-t-time.”

  “Will you stay with me for a while?” I ask softly, not really wanting to be alone.

  He nods and reaches for the buttons on my jacket to help me take it off. I know he only meant to help me get comfortable, but I’m tired and just want to drop into bed and have him hold me.

  I nudge off my shoes before unbuttoning my pants and sliding them off.

  Nikolai stares at me with surprise.

  I leave the blouse on and walk to the bed, pulling back the sheets and climbing in. Then, I wait to see if he’s going to join me.

  His eyes soften, and then he takes off his coat and shoes, but remains in his dark pants and long-sleeved, button-down shirt. He comes over and climbs into the bed under the covers, sliding towards me.

  I move close so that I am facing him, allowing his body heat under the covers to warm me.

  His gray eyes are intense as they search mine. He reaches near my ear and gently tucks away a strand of hair.

  I wish I was healed enough for sex, because getting lost in him sounds wonderful right about now. However, with the incision site still tender on my abdomen, I don’t think a lot of hip movement is a wise idea. Still, lying here with him, it’s very pleasant.

  And it still feels intimate.

  I like it.

  Nikolai is quiet as he contentedly lies with me, and he shifts one of his arms to rest on my hip.

  A smile curves my lips. “This is nice,” I murmur.

  He nods in agreement.

  We haven’t had any further conversations like the one we’d had the other day when he’d abruptly left my room. I’ve been careful to keep our conversations light, but right now, I feel like I need more from him.