'TIL DEATH DO US PART (Silent Demons Book 2)

by C. Luca

  I want to know everything about him.

  “Nik?” I ask softly.

  He looks at me questioningly.

  My eyes search his. “The scars on your back are from your father, aren’t they?” It’s a risk bringing up such a touchy subject, but I feel it’s a risk worth taking. I’ve given him space, and now I’m hoping he’s willing to venture into these topics with me.

  Nikolai goes completely still, and then I see resignation in his gaze as he releases a long exhale. “Y-y-yes,” he admits.

  I reach out and rest my hand on his side, feeling the warmth of his skin through his shirt. “He was your first kill,” I say, and it’s not a question. I’ve had my suspicion.

  He just gazes back at me, the answer in his eyes.

  “Last year,” I begin, licking my lips as I continue to push the topic, “what you did to me was very specific. You didn’t hurt me, but the cage, the dog food, the cold water… It was like one big mindfuck. Did he do that to you, too?” I ask carefully.

  Nikolai removes his arm and carefully eases away from me, running both hands over his face. At first, I think he’s going to leave the bed, but instead, he digs his cell phone from his pants pocket and then sits up against the pillows. His fingers move across the phone’s screen.

  I sit up as well, waiting to see where this conversation will lead.

  He shows me his phone. I’m sorry I put you through that.

  I reach over and touch his arm. “I know. And you didn’t answer my question,” I say gently. “I think you know by now that you can trust me.”

  His lips flatten, and his fingers move across the phone’s screen once more. Then, he tilts the phone so I can see his reply. My father was a sick fuck. Yes, I was locked in a cage as a kid. When I didn’t eat the dog food, I was punished. If I pissed myself, I was punished.

  My heart aches for the young child that was treated so cruelly. “I thought that might be the case.”

  Nikolai types on the phone and shows me. My stutter made it so much worse. He got off on using it against me.

  I search his gaze. “Were you born with it?”

  He shakes his head, and I wait patiently as he types his reply. My mother disappeared when I was three. My father was an alcoholic and didn’t watch me enough. I fell down the stairs at home and suffered a brain injury.

  I stare at his text, and then lift my eyes to his with confusion. “She disappeared?” I thought he had said she died.

  Nikolai turns back to the phone. I watch his facial features as he types the details of his life to share with me. I can see that this is difficult for him, but he doesn’t appear to be upset with my questions.

  He shows me the phone’s screen. Yes, but I know my father killed her. He was a mean bastard who knocked her around—my father had quite the police record. He likely thought she was going to leave him at some point and killed her for it. Some men won’t let anyone else have what they had or can’t have, so they kill.

  I’m quiet as everything sinks in.

  “I’m not l-l-like my f-f-father,” he rasps, his voice breaking the silence.

  I stare at him with bewilderment and alarm. Had I somehow led him to believe that? “I never said you were, Nik,” I say, my tone very firm.

  His face twists. “I put you in t-t-that cage,” he says stiltedly. “I was t-t-turning into,” his jaw clenches as he tries to push out the last word, “him,” he says in a slight snarl. “But n-n-not any m-m-more. I will n-n-never hurt you…again.” His eyes hold mine, and there’s such an overwhelming amount of sincerity deep within their depths that my breath catches. “Even if y-y-you leave m-m-me,” he finishes.

  I move closer to him and cup his face, hoping that everything I feel for him is visible in my gaze. “I believe you,” I assure. “And the only leaving I plan on doing is just so that I can have my own place. I still want to be with you.”

  He opens his mouth, likely to protest, and I lean in and press my lips against his. I kiss him gently before pulling back and meeting his gaze. “I am not arguing with you about my leaving tomorrow.”

  He gives me a look.

  I ignore it and cuddle into his side, wrapping my arm around his waist. “Right now, all I want is for you to hold me. And maybe spend the night with me tonight so I can sleep in your arms.”

  TWENTY-FIVE

  Nikolai

  I can’t sleep, so I watch Blakely while she slumbers beside me. It’s easy to lose myself in her beauty since the lamp is on.

  Regret burrows deep within my chest over the fact that she’d made it clear she needed the lamp to stay on during the night. She hadn’t admitted that it had anything to do with me, but I think she fears the dark.

  That’s likely my fault.

  There’s plenty of regrets that linger deep within me, and they haunt me more and more as the days go by. I can’t change the past though, so I try not to let it overtake me. All I can do is control my actions from here on out, and I’m making damn certain that Blakely never has reason to fear me or doubt my motives.

  I watch as Blakely’s chest rises and steadily falls while she sleeps. It’s late, about one in the morning, and she’s peacefully slumbering while I lie on my side and watch her intently. She’d changed into an oversized tee for bed and happens to be wearing only panties beneath.

  I’d switched my clothes for simple pajama pants earlier, and as I lie here with her, my mind continues to wander.

  I’d spent most of the day with her today, and it’d felt good. There doesn’t have to be sex involved for me to enjoy Blakely’s company. She’s opened me up to an entirely new world that I hadn’t known existed until she came along.

  Somehow, I’ve come to trust her, or I would have never confessed my past or allowed her to see my vulnerability when I speak. I knew she was special from the very beginning, and I’m glad that I’d listened to my gut and kept her alive after all.

  Life seems much more colorful with her in it, and it’s such a change actually living in the present rather than going through the motions of a repetitive existence.

  I also knew the second she’d entered my life, she was mine.

  Now, all I want to do is protect her, but she’s determined to go to the hotel tomorrow until she can find an apartment to rent.

  Instinct is telling me someone’s after Blakely, but I have no proof. Nothing has happened since the attack, and the killer’s identity still remains a mystery.

  It burns me not knowing.

  I’m accustomed to getting my own way, but this situation is out of my hands.

  Sometimes, I even wonder if it could possibly be an enemy of mine that has targeted her, but I’ve been so careful throughout the years. The only people that know my true identity behind my illegal dealings are the men that work for me, and I can’t imagine any of them turning on me.

  They have no reason.

  I can’t think of anyone that would want to harm Blakely, except perhaps Jonah. I’m fully aware that he hates her, which is why I try to limit his interaction with her unless it can’t be helped.

  Am I absolutely positive he’d never hurt her? No.

  After all, he’s a trained killer.

  However, Jonah has always been quite loyal. He knows that if he ever hurt Blakely, I’d hunt him down to the ends of the earth to put him down. Still, I’ve been keeping a close eye on him, because Blakely has somehow become my entire life, and I never want to let her go.

  Problem is, I want her willing, so I can’t keep her here against her will.

  I just can’t seem to get through to her that she’s likely still in danger. There has to be a way to get her to stay, but I’m currently drawing blanks.

  She hates this place, and I can’t blame her for feeling that way. So, I’d tried to make the estate more appealing by telling her the other day that she could leave the guest room and roam the house if she’d like.

  She’d shut down the idea and said that there was no point since she’d be leaving soon.

/>   Blakely’s a very stubborn woman.

  She has every intention of staying at a hotel beginning tomorrow night, and I don’t know how to stall her leaving. Plus, the little fool intends to reclaim her shifts at the club starting Thursday evening.

  My gaze shifts away from her as I roll onto my back, staring broodingly up at the ceiling.

  She has completely turned my world upside down, and as twisted as it is, I enjoy the challenge of trying to tame her while knowing she’ll never bend to my will.

  TWENTY-SIX

  Blakely

  My duffel bags are on the bed, zipped and ready to go the following afternoon. Nikolai and his driver will be taking me shortly to the hotel I’ve chosen, so I scan the guest room one more time, making certain that I’m not leaving anything behind.

  As much as I’d like to stay to be close to Nikolai, I can’t wait to get away from this place. I’ll never feel like I’m on equal ground here with him. There are just too many bad memories of the basement, and the loss of control and overall vulnerability I’d felt when I’d gone through the ordeal continues to haunt me.

  I’m torn from my dark thoughts as Nikolai enters the room. As usual, he’s a heavenly sight in jeans that fit him to perfection, and a long-sleeved, black sweater that has been pushed up to bare his tanned forearms.

  He already has his phone out and is texting me. I dig my phone from my purse that I’d left near the bags and turn on the screen. His text immediately appears. You can’t stay at the hotel permanently. Let me lease an apartment for you.

  I slant him a look that betrays how peeved I am over his suggestion. I don’t want any financial help from him, and he knows this, yet he still persists. This is a conversation we’ve had multiple times already. “I told you, I’m looking at two apartments on Friday.”

  His jaw visibly flexes, and his gray eyes stare me down for a moment before dropping to his phone.

  I patiently wait for his reply with a sense of dread. I’d wanted to leave here on good terms. Those don’t have enough security, appears on my phone’s screen.

  I was hoping he’d let the topic rest. I should have known I wasn’t getting out of here without another argument, and I release a sigh. “You can’t be certain anyone is after me, Nik,” I insist. “You, yourself, have admitted you’re coming up emptyhanded without evidence of your claims. Besides, those apartments fit my budget.”

  His eyes are downcast as his fingers move across his phone’s screen, but I can see the stern line of his jaw. He’s ready to argue until we’re both blue in the face. His stubbornness drives me nuts sometimes.

  Let me help, Blakely, pops up on my screen. I pull together my patience and walk over to him, giving him a calm but unyielding look. “I can take care of myself. Plus, I have my savings for a backup if I should need it,” I explain.

  His eyes sharpen when I mention my savings. The earlier argument is momentarily forgotten as his focus switches to his curiosity over what I’ve been saving for all this time. “What are y-y-you s-s-saving for?” he asks me, his voice deep with a hint of cajoling.

  I have no reason to keep my dreams and goals from him anymore. “Home,” I say simply.

  His handsome face melts into confusion. “H-h-home?” he questions.

  I nod somberly. “Nothing was ever truly mine, my aunt made sure I knew that,” I say with a grimace. “I really want a place of my own, somewhere I can call home and never worry that someone’s going to take it from me. Apartments and duplexes are temporary. I want something that’s all mine,” I tell him, unable to keep the longing out of my voice.

  Recognition flickers in his gaze, and he dips his head, nodding to let me know that he gets it without my needing to explain myself further.

  I step closer to him and rise up onto my tippy toes so I can press a kiss against his cheek. I peer up at him with smiling eyes. “I’ll be fine,” I assure, and then the smile reaches my lips. “We’re just going back to dating, that’s all.”

  He quirks an eyebrow, looking amused.

  “What, you think you’re too manly to date?” I tease.

  Now exasperation flickers over his features. “As l-l-long as you’re m-m-mine,” his eyes search mine, “I don’t c-c-care what you c-c-call it.”

  I gaze up at him, thankful that he’s in my life and that the darkness that had been hovering over me the past week is beginning to fade. “I’m definitely yours,” I promise.

  His eyes gleam as he pockets his phone and slips his arms around me, careful not to nudge the right side of my ribs. “G-g-good. I’m s-s-staying with you t-t-tonight,” he says firmly.

  “What?” My expression slides into a frown. “No, you’re not. I’ll be perfectly safe on my own,” I protest.

  Something unidentifiable lurks in the depths of his gaze. “How else w-w-will we have p-p-privacy for fun t-t-things?” he actually teases me.

  My heart warms as his humor appears. We’ve come such a long way.

  And he’s right.

  We haven’t been able to be intimate because of my injuries, but I’m feeling much better as each day goes by, and I can’t wait to resume our intimacy.

  “You can definitely come over for that, but you’re not staying the night,” I warn.

  He gives me a challenging look.

  “No,” I say steadily.

  * * *

  I wake in the hotel bed the following morning, and I am not alone.

  Nikolai is sleeping peacefully beside me. He’d gotten his way after all, but I can’t be too upset. It had been nice to snuggle with him last night. I’d tried to initiate sex, but he was more concerned about my injuries and had insisted we wait.

  If only I hadn’t tripped in the shower yesterday evening and cried out in pain. Had that not have happened, I think I could have convinced him.

  Carefully, I turn onto my side, only feeling a twinge in my abdomen.

  I gaze at Nikolai, watching him sleep.

  There is so much to him that I never could have imagined. In the beginning, when he’d kidnapped me, I’d thought him to be cold and heartless. He’s far from all those misconceptions.

  He’s quite proficient at hiding anything he feels, but he’s been slowly easing back his barriers, and I’m pleased with the man that I’m getting to know. Each day, I know I’m falling for him more and more.

  Nikolai stirs in his sleep but shows no signs of fully waking, so I continue to ogle him. He’s sprawled on his back, his features relaxed but no less dangerous—especially with the morning whiskers darkening his jaw.

  My eyes lower and take in the expanse of his tanned chest that’s toned in all the right places. The hotel bedsheet hides his hips from me, but I don’t need to see what I already know is there. It’s already burned into my memory from the times we’d been intimate before the attack.

  I can feel my heart softening towards him as I watch him sleep.

  Nikolai is a very special man.

  Perhaps it was fate that I pickpocketed him that day.

  Naturally, my mind shifts to Ava, because she’s never far from my thoughts. Some of the contentment I’d felt moments earlier, fades.

  It still hurts to think about her, and it always will, but the all-consuming agony is beginning to lift as I adjust to my new reality. Next week, I want to take flowers to her grave to feel close to her.

  I just really, really miss her.

  I also know she’d be happy that I’m beginning to move on, and by moving on, I mean working tonight at the club. My manager had been incredibly understanding about what had happened, and he’d even told me I could wait until next week to resume my shifts, but I feel that I need to start now.

  It's time to get moving and resume life, otherwise, I’ll just dwell on everything that’s happened, and that’s not good for me.

  Nikolai stirs and catches me watching him. He looks at me questioningly as the sleep fades from his gaze.

  “Can I ask you something?” I ask softly. We’ve really made some progress w
hen it comes to being honest with each other. I’d like to keep it going.

  He shifts on the mattress to face me fully as he patiently waits to see what I want to know.

  “You kill people, right?” I ask carefully.

  His brows furrow, revealing that the topic is a sensitive one. Which is to be expected, considering. His eyes search mine as his expression turns very serious. “What b-b-brought this on?” he asks, his voice still a bit husky from sleep.

  I reach out and trail a nail along his bare bicep, wanting to touch him. “You’ve never really told me the truth.” I gaze at him, letting him see within my eyes that it’s simple curiosity. I won’t judge him over his answer.

  His face tightens. “B-b-because the t-t-truth isn’t p-p-pretty,” he says stiffly.

  I meet his gaze. “I don’t want pretty, Nik.”

  He gives me a hard stare. “Knowing d-d-details is d-d-dangerous,” he grits out.

  He has a point, especially since he works with others. My nail trailing across his skin pauses, and I rest my hand on the side of his bicep. “Okay, then let’s keep it simple,” I agree. “You kill people, right?” I press.

  His expression turns resigned when he realizes he can’t possibly sway me from my line of questioning. “N-n-not so m-m-much anymore,” he admits.

  I look at him intently, thinking about how he controls Jonah and Reed. “You’re like the boss, and the employees do the work?” I guess.

  He gives a sharp nod.

  “Do you like it?” I ask curiously.

  He shrugs a shoulder and reaches up to rake a hand through his dark hair, causing my eyes to flicker briefly to his muscular chest. “I d-d-don’t m-m-mind it,” he responds, and his eyes gleam, letting me know that he hadn’t missed the way I’d momentarily been distracted.

  I ignore his satisfaction as I focus on his answer to my question. He doesn’t mind it, but that doesn’t mean he likes it, either. I’m glad. “Would you ever quit?” I dare to ask.