Catch Me If I Fall

by Daniele Lanzarotta

  I try not to laugh as I say, “Let’s go find out.”

  We walk hand in hand and when we get to the door and Alec starts to ask them how long they’ve been here, I let go of his hand and following mom’s instructions, I grab the key from under the mat. Everyone just watches me curiously as I unlock the door. As soon as we go in, the lights come on, and everyone yells, “Surprise!” There is a banner out back that says ‘Good Luck!’ and everything else is baseball themed.

  I look at Alec to see his reaction and he is watching me.

  “You did all of this?” he asks, surprised.

  “I had a little help,” I wink at him.

  “Come on,” I say. “There is a ton of food in the kitchen and Kyle’s mom brought his guitar. It should be out back.”

  I start to walk away, but he pulls me back and turns me around.

  “You’re amazing,” he says right before he kisses me.

  We go outside where the guys already started a bonfire. Kyle sings a few songs while Alec and I eat. I’m about to join Kyle when Alec reaches for my hand.

  “Come with me?” he asks and I nod.

  I follow him inside the house and upstairs.

  “Hmm… Where are we going?” I ask.

  “Trust me,” he winks.

  We go into one of the upstairs rooms and then, Alec opens the window and we climb out and sit on top of the roof, where the view is simply amazing. We are facing the side of the house, so people out back can’t see us. We lay down on the roof and watch the hundreds of stars above us.

  “You know,” I say. “Although I love kissing you. I was trying to tell you something earlier at the waterfall and you kept interrupting me,” I laugh.

  “Like this?” he asks before leaning on top of me and kissing me again.

  “Pretty much,” I say against his lips, “but I think you interrupted me for longer last time.”

  “Like this?” he asks and I smile against his lips.

  “Okay,” he says. “As much as I love kissing you, I’m curious. What did you want to say?”

  I take a deep breath. “That I’m thankful you came back into my life when you did. Losing Kristi was hell and I could never have gone through all that happened without you.”

  His smile turns into a frown. “I just wish we hadn’t wasted ten years before that.”

  I shake my head. “We are here now. That is what matters,” I say.

  By the time we get down from the roof, the parents are all gone. The guys are sitting around the bonfire while Kyle plays his guitar. As soon as Kyle sees me, he motions for me to join him. I sit next to Kyle and Alec sits next to me. Kyle hands me his guitar and the singing goes on until I have to go home.

  We get home a few minutes before my curfew. Alec parks in his driveway and shuts off the engine, but stays where he is. He stares toward our houses and I do the same. I’m sure we are both thinking the same thing. He reaches for my hand, and I say, “It’s going to be weird. You not being so close by all the time.”

  He looks away from the house and his eyes meet mine. “I know… But until you finish school, I will be here every single chance I get and if you ever need anything, I will drop everything to get back over here. I love you, Sky.”

  “I love you too,” I say.

  He glances toward my house again and chuckles. “Your dad is spying on us again.”

  I roll my eyes and tell him goodnight before I go in.

  On Sunday, my world turns upside down. In between helping Alec pack the rest of his things and family time, it feels like the day goes by in a blur.

  I told myself a million times that I wouldn’t cry when saying goodbye. I told myself over and over that it is just for a week, but my mind was already stuck on hardly being able to see him when baseball season starts. Right before leaving, he reaches into one of his bags and pulls out his old high school baseball jersey. “I know I won’t be in the room across from yours, but maybe if you sleep in my jersey—I don’t know… maybe that will make things slightly easier. Either way, I like the thought of you wearing it,” he winks and wipes my tears away before kissing me goodbye.

  CHAPTER THREE

  I slam the door to my room as mom comes after me.

  “Skylar!” Mom opens the door behind me.

  “I don’t want to talk, Mom.”

  “Honey. You can’t fall apart every time he leaves for college. I know it is hard, but...”

  I sit on my bed and hug this huge bear that Alec gave me a few weeks back. “I just need to get used to it. That’s all. This time is different.”

  “I know it is.” She sighs and sits on the bed next to me. She looks over toward the window. “We have lived here for so long and they’ve been our neighbors for all this time. Even for us, it is going to be strange not having Alec next door. We watched him grow up.” She looks back at me, “But, honey,” she reaches over and puts her hand over mine, “you had an entire summer to get used to the idea that he is going away for college, and I know you. I know you encouraged him to take the scholarship instead of going to college here in town. It was the right thing for him to do and now, he should focus on that. Your Dad and I even gave you some space to spend as much time with Alec as possible before he had to leave. And now that school is starting, things are not going to be easy, but you have to find a way to be okay with it, or you will just make yourself miserable.” She pauses and takes a deep breath. “I really hope you can make this work, sweetheart, but I’m worried about you. You can’t stop living your life here just because he isn’t around.”

  “Mom, it’s fine. I expect things to get worse before they get better, but they will get better.”

  “Honey.”

  “Mom,” I say in an annoyed tone. I take a deep breath. “We’ll make it work. Long distance relationships are not how it was back in your day. We have Skype, FaceTime…”

  “Honey.” She shakes her head. “It won’t be the same as having him here. I’m not trying to be mean or negative. I just don’t want to see you hurting.” She takes a deep breath when I don’t say anything. “Okay. Just remember that I’m here if you want to talk.”

  “I will,” I say as I look away, toward the window that is straight across from his.

  She leaves my room and I lay down. I close my eyes, and try to find a happy place, I re-live one of the many memories from this summer.

  That day, we went to the waterfall with Alec’s sister, Amanda, and Kyle. I was laying down on one of the rocks, sunbathing, with Amanda next to me. I closed my eyes for a few minutes while I listened to one of my favorite songs, and when I opened my eyes, Amanda was no longer there. Alec was laying next to me… watching me.

  “What is on your mind, Alec?” I asked the question that we often ask one another.

  He tilted his head to the side and grinned like he was up to something. “I think I have a plan for that list.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  Alec has this to do list that is like a bucket list, in a way. Every so often, he surprises me by doing one of those things.

  “I’m going to save it,” he said. “For when school starts… to give you something to look forward to.”

  I laughed. “You don’t need to do that. I’ll always have something to look forward to.”

  He smiled. Ugh. His smile drives me crazy. “What is that?” he asked.

  I grinned. “Seeing you.”

  He moved over and leaned on top me… his hair dripping freezing cold water on my skin.

  “I love you, Sky.”

  I open my eyes and pull myself back to reality. I know that Alec and Kyle are still driving back to school so I fight the urge to text him. I decide to go downstairs to find something to pass time until he calls. I regret the decision when I get to the hallway and hear mom and dad arguing.

  I stand in the upstairs hallway where I can hear them.

  “I’m worried, Hun,” says dad. “I thought they would’ve broken up by now. People in town don’t care that the kids have known
each other since they were little, or that they all watched Alec grow up. They are talking and it is distracting to have your employees gossiping about how you let your underage daughter date a college guy,” says dad.

  “It’s a small town. People talk. It’s only a two-year difference, and Alec has always been respectful of Skylar and us. He is very aware of her age and the fact that he is now in college. His parents had plenty of talks with him. You know that.”

  “I know, but—”

  “Just give it time. As much as I hate to even think this way, he is in college. He will meet someone else sooner or later.”

  There is a pause.

  “I’m still hoping that this long distance thing will decide their fate before it comes to that, or before I have to intervene,” says dad.

  “Hun.”

  “She is too young, and they are too attached,” says dad. “He is her first boyfriend. Things shouldn’t be this… serious. It’s just overwhelming to even be in the same room as them.” He pauses. “I don’t want to see Skylar get hurt.”

  I just turn around and go back to my room.

  When Alec tries to FaceTime me that night, I make sure the light in my room is off in the hopes that he won’t notice that I’ve been crying, but my voice gives it away.

  “What is wrong?” he asks.

  I sigh. “Nothing… just… parent talk. That is all.”

  “Oh.”

  “Yeah.” We leave it at that. We’ve both had and heard many parent talks over the summer.

  We don’t talk long because Kyle grabs the phone from Alec’s hand and shows up on the screen. “Hi Skylar. Look, I’m starving and Alec won’t let me borrow his truck to get something to eat, so I’m gonna need to borrow him.”

  I laugh. ‘Guys and their toys…’ School starts tomorrow anyway, so we say our goodbyes.

  “Sky?” Alec says before I hang up. “Are you gonna be okay?”

  I assure him that I will, but even I don’t believe in the words I’m saying.

  I have a hard time going to sleep and I know if I play my guitar, I will wake up mom and dad, so instead, I grab a piece of paper and start writing song lyrics to take my mind away from everything, and soon, I find myself smiling at the words on the paper.

  ALEC

  I hang up the phone and give Kyle the death stare. “Really?” I ask.

  He shrugs. “You have no idea how hungry I am. We have no food in this place.”

  I shake my head. “Give me a few minutes.”

  I go to my room and take a look around. This was supposed to be exciting. College… my first apartment… but it feels far from it. Everything is all unpacked, and I keep feeling like something is missing, until I look out the window and it hits me. I can’t look out and know that she is right across from me anymore.

  Something hits my back and I turn around to find Kyle by the door, and the football he threw at me is now on the floor.

  “Dude. Really?”

  He shrugs. “I’m making dinner,” he says all proud. “I found a box of groceries mom packed.”

  I laugh. "Have you ever cooked anything in your life?”

  “There is a first time for everything!” he says.

  “What are you making anyway?”

  “Sloppy Joes. Can’t screw that up.”

  I roll my eyes at him and follow him out of the room.

  I go into the kitchen and by the stove to see how this is coming along, even though I can’t really cook either. I stir the sauce with the spatula.

  “Hey, Kyle?”

  “Yeah?” he says as he sits on the couch and flips through the channels.

  “Where the hell is the meat? This is all sauce.”

  He quickly rushes to the kitchen. “That wasn’t in the can? I mean… the label shows meat on it.”

  I can’t stop laughing. I turn the stove off. “Hmmm. No. I’m going to clean this up. Get ready. We can go out to eat.”

  Kyle goes to his room mumbling something about deceptive advertising even though it says right there on the label that meat is not included.

  I throw everything in the dishwasher and we head out to a pizza place nearby.

  On the way, Kyle texts James and he meets us there.

  We all sit down and order two pizzas.

  “So, there is a party at one of the frat houses tonight,” says James. “You should come along.”

  “Nah. I’m just going to go back and call Skylar, if she is still up.”

  Kyle shakes his head. “I’m not letting you stay cooped up in that apartment the for the next two years. You are coming even if I have to annoy you until you agree to it.”

  Knowing Kyle, he means business. “Fine. I will go. You need someone to keep an eye on you anyway,” I laugh.

  “This girl has really got you whipped, huh?” says James.

  “She does,” Kyle answers before I can.

  The conversation quickly moves to baseball and the upcoming season. We eat the pizza and get back to the apartment so Kyle can change. Kyle is the first one in.

  “Holy crap!” he says.

  “What?” I walk past him and our entire kitchen is covered in bubbles.

  “What the hell did you put in the dishwasher?” he asks, and he can’t stop laughing.

  “Dish soap,” I say and he laughs even more.

  “What? We didn’t get around to getting dishwasher soap yet.”

  James laughs uncontrollably. “Maybe you two should just eat out from now on.”

  We all agree that is probably for the best.

  I just stare at the mess in the kitchen, dumbfounded. I turn to Kyle, “Go ahead and go with James. I will clean up.”

  He gives me a warning look.

  “Just go. I will tag along whenever the next party happens.”

  Kyle finally gives in and leaves with James.

  After cleaning the mess, I’m exhausted. I go to my room and lay down, but it doesn’t matter how tired I am. I can’t fall asleep.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  SKYLAR

  I dread the time when the alarm goes off. I’d been staring at it for a good hour. One minute before it actually goes off, I turn it off and get up.

  It’s weird going back to school when everyone I hung out with is gone. I think about calling Alec, thinking that somehow, talking to him will ease my nerves, but I don’t want to wake him up. He still has a while before he has to be up for classes anyway.

  I get dressed and drag myself downstairs to eat breakfast before I get on the bus. Yet another change…

  I find dad in the kitchen, eating breakfast.

  “Oh. I thought you’d be at work.”

  He smiles. “I’m going in late. Thought I would give you a ride on your first day.”

  I smile back at him and sit down.

  “In fact, maybe you can drive. You really need to start practicing.”

  “Seriously?!” I ask excitedly.

  “Sure,” he says.

  This cheers me up. I know that once I get my license, it will be easier to see Alec more often, at least, in theory.

  I finish my breakfast really fast, and get up.

  “Ready?” I ask.

  Dad smiles and throws the keys at me. “Let’s go.”

  I go to the front door, dad following me, and when I open it, I find Alec standing there and it feels like I forget how to breathe. His hair is messy like he just woke up and didn’t have time to brush it. I stare into his chocolate brown eyes and he gives me a crooked smile.

  I go toward him and he pulls me into a hug. I can feel his warm breath on my neck by my ear as he takes a deep breath, taking in the scent of my hair. I love when he does that.

  I hear dad clear his throat and I quickly pull away.

  “Hi, Mr. Bradshaw,” says Alec.

  “Hi Alec.”

  “What are you doing here?” I ask. “You didn’t get there until late last night. Did you even sleep? Don’t you have class?”

  He laughs at my bombarding hi
m with questions. “I wanted to give my girl a ride to school on her first day. Kyle will take notes for me, but I doubt anything will happen on the first day anyway.”

  I feel butterflies in my stomach.

  I look back at dad, but see the disappointed look in his eyes, and I don’t know what to do. I look back at Alec.

  “Actually, dad was going to let me drive today.” I look away. “Can you maybe pick me up after school, if you are still in town?”

  Truthfully, I don’t want to disappoint dad; but, I’m also afraid I will never actually go into the school if Alec takes me.

  “Of course. That’s fine. Driving, huh? Is it okay if I ride with you?”

  I laugh. “I think you’d make me nervous.”

  “Oh.”

  Now he is the one who looks disappointed. I just can’t win this morning. Dad surprisingly comes to the rescue. “Sorry, Alec. I have to get to work right after.” He pauses. “We have to get going, Skylar.”

  “Okay.” I smile at Alec. “I will see you later?”

  He smiles back. “Yeah. Of course.”

  He pulls me into another hug and whispers, “I love you, Sky”

  “I love you too,” I whisper back.

  I can’t stop smiling. I reluctantly get into the car and start it. Dad reminds me to adjust the mirrors and to make sure I use them all. He took me driving a few weeks ago too, so I’m not as nervous as I was that day, but still pretty nervous.

  I wave at Alec.

  “Both hands on the wheel,” he warns.

  “Yes, Dad.”

  I put the car in drive and drive away, watching Alec in the reviewer mirror as I go.

  The short drive to school goes smoothly. When we get to school, I pull into a parking spot.

  “So how did I do?”

  I look over at dad and he seems distant.

  “Dad?”

  “Yes, sweetheart?”

  “How did I do?”

  “Not bad for the second time,” he smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

  I take my seatbelt off.

  “Skylar?”

  “Yes, Dad.”

  “Isn’t it too soon for the whole ‘I love you’ thing?” He asks.

  I turn bright red. “Dad!”

  “I’m serious, sweetheart. You are young and Alec is in college now and—”